by Lori Wilde
Even so, her sister’s words rankled, partly because Elena knew that on some level, they were true. But she’d chosen her path with careful deliberation. Sure, there were times when she felt that she was meant for something bigger and more exciting, but she simply had to spend time with her parents and sisters to remember exactly why she’d opted for the conventional life she now led.
Her family might boast about the hot, Spanish blood that flowed through their veins, claiming it was the reason for their unpredictable and often volatile behavior, but Elena wanted no part of it. She’d watched her parents divorce and remarry each other twice; she’d spent countless nights with each of her sisters, lending both an ear and a shoulder as they’d wept and wailed about the failure of yet another relationship. Her younger sister, Sarita, actually enjoyed dating two, even three men at a time and then watching the fireworks when they found out about each other. That kind of excitement she could do without.
Granted, Nick Belcastro seemed like a decent guy, and he was both gorgeous and financially independent, but Elena wondered how long he’d tolerate Carmen’s mood swings before he decided he’d had enough.
Elena glanced at her watch as she pulled out of the restaurant parking lot. Nearly one-thirty. Was Larry still at the office? They had plans to go out to dinner and a movie later on, but Elena suddenly had an urge to see him, if only to reassure herself that he wasn’t as mediocre as Carmen claimed. She could picture him in his office, surrounded by papers, with his hair sticking up from where he’d combed his fingers through it in frustration. Deciding he could use a break, she swung the car in the direction of the federal building where they both worked. Even if he’d already left, there was some paperwork she could collect from her own office and bring home with her.
Twenty minutes later, Elena passed through the security checkpoint and walked through the darkened corridors toward Larry’s office. The Defense Procurement Agency oversaw the purchase and delivery of goods and services for the military. Elena and Larry worked in the agency’s headquarters, an impressive four-story structure of limestone and sleek marble, located on the outskirts of Washington, D.C.
After obtaining her law degree, Elena had spent the first few years of her career negotiating and administering contracts for the military, everything from nuts and bolts to major weapons systems. She was good at what she did. So good that she’d been offered a promotion to the DPA’s legal department, writing policy and procedure manuals for the agency’s contracting center. There was very little that Elena didn’t know about contracting, both from an administrative and a legal perspective.
Her parents might be disappointed that she hadn’t chosen to use her law degree in litigation, but striding up and down a courtroom while making impassioned speeches to a judge and jury held little appeal for Elena. Nope, she enjoyed researching regulations and statutes, and then applying them to how the agency did business. She didn’t mind sitting through oversight meetings and briefing senior leadership on changes in federal procurement policy. She told herself yet again that what she did mattered. She was making a difference.
Elena stopped briefly at the mailroom and checked her box, flipping through the assorted envelopes and papers for anything that might require her immediate attention. Most of the mail was routine correspondence, including a letter from the Director’s office requesting civilian volunteers—especially those with contracts and legal experience—to work in Iraq for six months, negotiating and monitoring the defense contracts there. According to the memo, such volunteer deployments were the agency’s number-one mission.
Elena snorted. As if that would ever happen. This was the third such call for volunteers in as many months, and while most folks who did volunteer had only positive things to say about their deployment experience, Elena couldn’t imagine working in Iraq or Afghanistan. While she had an extensive background negotiating military contracts, the agency couldn’t pay her enough money to go over there. She disliked being hot, and having mortars lobbed at her wasn’t a huge incentive, either.
Carrying her mail in one hand, she walked toward Larry’s office. His door was closed and she had a moment’s regret that she’d missed him, when she saw a shadow pass beneath the crack at the bottom. Just then, a crash sounded from behind the closed door and Elena heard Larry give a pained groan.
“Larry!” She thrust the door open so hard that it slammed against the wall, and then she stood there, speechless at the sight that greeted her.
Larry stood at the side of his desk with his pants and underwear crumpled around his ankles, his shirt open and flapping loosely around his pale buttocks and thighs. Sprawled facedown across his desk was a woman, her black skirt pushed up around her waist. Her legs were splayed wide, the stiletto heels on her shoes lending them extra length. Larry gripped the woman’s hips as she bent forward over the desk, thrusting himself into her. His head was thrown back and the cords in his neck stood out in a way that Elena had never seen when he’d been with her.
The crash she’d heard had been Larry’s alabaster paperweight falling to the floor as the woman swept it from the surface of the desk in her frenzy. The paperweight Elena had given to him on Valentine’s Day last year.
In the instant before they both turned toward her, Elena recognized the other woman as one of the new interns they’d hired in the legal department. Her reddish hair fell forward over her face, and her eyes were hazy with pleasure. Her full lips were parted and moist as she gripped the edges of the desk and arched her back to give Larry better access. When she raised herself to look toward the door, Elena saw her pink blouse was open at the front and her bra was pulled down below her breasts, which had left a damp mark on the glossy veneer of the desk.
For a moment, the three of them stared at each other. Larry’s harsh breathing was the only sound that broke the stunned silence, until he muttered an oath and snatched himself from the woman’s body.
Elena didn’t wait to see more. She turned on her heel and walked blindly back the way she’d come, unable to dispel the erotic images she’d just witnessed. She tried to recall when the woman—Claire—had first begun working at the agency. Five months ago, maybe? Six? How long had she and Larry been having an affair? Was this what he did every Saturday when he told her he was going into the office?
“Elena, wait.”
Larry trotted down the corridor after her, shoving his shirt into his waistband. Elena stopped and watched him approach, noting his flushed features and disheveled hair. She’d always thought he was attractive, but now all she could see were his white legs and thin buttocks, pumping furiously into another woman.
“What do you want, Larry?” She glanced at her watch, ignoring how her hand trembled. “I really can’t stay. I only came by because I thought you needed a break from work.” She gave a bitter laugh. “Little did I know.”
Larry swiped a hand through his hair, looking both embarrassed and defiant. “You should have called. You always call first.”
Elena gaped at him. “I should have called? Excuse me, but I work here, too. I don’t need your permission to come by the office after hours, Larry.” She ran a scathing eye over him. “It figures that the first time I do, this is what I find. You, in a sweaty clutch with the office intern. It’s so cliché that it’s actually pathetic. What if someone else had seen you? You both could be fired for this.”
“I think I’m in love with her,” he blurted, then swiped a hand across his face. “I mean, I know I’m in love with her. I am in love with her.”
Elena’s mouth fell open, but no words came out. She stared at him, speechless.
“I’m sorry,” he muttered, clearly uncomfortable. “I didn’t mean for you to find us—to find out like this.” He rubbed the back of his neck and glanced toward his office where he’d left Claire. “It’s just that—”
“What?” Elena asked sarcastically. “I wasn’t willing to spread myself across your desk? To fulfill your naughty little fantasies? Maybe I would have done it, Larry. Maybe all y
ou had to do was ask, but now you’ll never know what I might have done, will you?”
To Elena’s dismay, Larry’s face grew tight. “I never asked, because I already knew what the answer would be. You’re not exactly Miss Excitement.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” Elena gasped, but she had a sinking feeling that she already knew. His words sounded a little too much like the conversation she’d had with her sister earlier that day.
“I don’t want to hurt you more than I already have,” Larry began, “but it wasn’t until I met Claire that I realized what I’d been missing with you.”
Elena’s eyebrows flew up. What? The numbness that had enveloped her when she’d first walked into Larry’s office was rapidly vanishing, to be replaced with a slow, simmering anger.
“Oh, and what would that be?” she asked sweetly. “I don’t seem to recall that you were missing out on anything. You had sex every week—and that was just with me. I always paid my own way when we went out. I never objected if you wanted to play golf with the guys, or head up to Atlantic City for a weekend. I never demanded anything of you, Larry, and I was always there when you wanted me. Basically, you had a perfect relationship.”
Larry missed the sharp edge beneath the silken veil of her words. “Yeah, it was a perfect relationship all right. Perfectly boring.”
“Boring? You think I’m boring?”
Larry made a sound of frustration. “No, that’s not what I said, but since you brought it up, then yes! I think you’re boring. Okay? Are you happy now? I said it!”
“Oh. My. God.” Elena stared at him in disbelief. “You’re serious.”
Didn’t he realize that in their relationship he was the boring one? He was the stereotypical accountant—detailed, meticulous and not given to extravagance or grand gestures. He was the kind of guy that you’d pass on the street and never look at twice. He appealed to her because he was ordinary and because she always knew what to expect from him. At least, she amended silently, she’d thought she always knew what to expect. And now, to find out that he thought she was boring!
“Listen, Elena, you’re a beautiful woman, but you’re too set in your ways. You need to be a little more flexible. You need to live a little.”
Elena arched an eyebrow. “It certainly appears your new girlfriend is flexible. Is that what this is all about, Larry? Having sex in forbidden places?”
Larry’s face turned a ruddy shade. “No, of course not. But it does have something to do with spontaneity. Face it, Elena. Your entire life is about order and routine. You’re a creature of habit, and you hate surprises. You’re about as capable of spontaneity as a fish is of flying.”
Later, Elena would not be sure what made her do it. She only knew that in that particular moment, the most important thing in the world was to prove Larry wrong. To show him irrefutable proof that she was as capable of being spontaneous and exciting as the next person. She snatched the director’s memorandum from the sheaf of mail she clutched in her hand and waved it beneath Larry’s nose.
“Oh, yeah? Well, here’s a little bit of spontaneity for you. I’ve decided to do a six-month deployment to Iraq.”
To her dismay, Larry’s eyebrows flew up, and he gave a snort of disbelieving laughter. “Oh, come on. We both know you’re bluffing. When did you decide this? Two seconds ago? We both know you’d never volunteer to go over there. You may not be a spur-of-the-moment girl, but you’re not stupid, either. Besides, you enjoy your creature comforts just a little too much to go to Iraq for six months. I can’t picture you sharing a B-hut with twenty other women, or eating in a chow hall every night.”
“Oh, really?” Elena tossed her head. “Well, believe it or not, I’m going. And I understand there are battalions of healthy, young, hard-bodied soldiers who would do anything to keep me safe. In fact, I’m sure my deployment will be rewarding on many different levels.”
To her satisfaction, Larry no longer looked quite so skeptical. “You’re kidding, right? That’s your damned sisters talking. You’d never actually do it.”
Elena gave him a sweet smile. “Watch me,” she purred, and turned on her heel and walked away.
2
Kuwait City, six weeks later
THWAP, THWAP, thwap.
The steady sound of helicopter blades cut through the air overhead, but Elena hardly noticed the noise. After three days spent sitting in a converted hangar alongside the U.S. military airstrip in Kuwait City, she’d become well accustomed to the sound of both helicopters and jets as they came in and then left again. The kicker was she should have been on one of those helicopters long before now.
She’d seen her orders; she was going to the Green Zone in Baghdad, where she would try to clean up the colossal mess that had been made of the military contracts there. She’d heard countless stories about how good the quality of life was in the Zone, and she’d actually begun looking forward to her deployment. In the six weeks since she’d volunteered to come to Iraq, she’d had plenty of opportunity to examine her life and had concluded that both Carmen and Larry were right—it was boring.
But that was all about to change. She was shaking things up in a big way. She’d embarked on an adventure and made a promise to herself to embrace each new and exciting opportunity as it came her way, no matter what. Now she stared at the woman holding the clipboard that contained her new orders, and silently counted to ten, willing herself to control her rising temper.
“What do you mean they’ve changed my assignment?” she demanded in dismay. “I’ve been sitting in this hangar for three days, waiting for a sandstorm to subside so that I can fly to Baghdad, Iraq. As in the Green Zone, complete with fitness center, modern plumbing and a fast-food burger joint. That’s what I signed up for—” she broke off to glance at the front of the woman’s uniform “—Major Dumfries. Not some remote outpost in northern Afghanistan.”
The other woman didn’t even have the grace to look apologetic. Instead, she met Elena’s gaze unflinchingly. “Your deployment paperwork clearly states that your assignment can change at any time, depending on need. The Defense Procurement Agency has indicated they now need you in Afghanistan, and you need to be flexible, ma’am.” She glanced again at the clipboard. “We have a helicopter departing for the outpost at 0600 hours tomorrow morning. I’ll see you back here at the airstrip then.”
Elena’s mouth fell open. “Wait! That’s it? Just like that, I’m now going to some hellhole in Afghanistan? How can you do this? Is it even legal?”
Major Dumfries smiled. “I don’t make the assignments, ma’am. I just make sure the folks get there in one piece.”
Elena took a deep breath and reminded herself yet again that this was an adventure—a new opportunity—and she would embrace it wholeheartedly. She pasted a smile on her face.
“Fine. I’ll go to this outpost.” Reaching down, she lifted her rucksack onto one shoulder and then hefted her two duffel bags with as much dignity as she could manage, considering they weighed about a gazillion pounds each. She started to turn away, and then swung back toward the Major. “Just out of curiosity, what kind of facilities do they have at this place?”
“Facilities?” The other woman’s eyebrow arched.
“Yes. As in dining hall, fitness center, recreation center…please tell me this outpost has facilities.”
Major Dumfries’s mouth twitched. “I understand they’re still in the process of improving the post, but they do have toilets and showers.”
Elena stared at her. “What about a dining hall? They must have that, right?”
“I believe there is a dining facility, yes.”
Elena drew in a deep breath. “Are there any other civilians at this outpost?”
“Several, as a matter of fact.”
Elena supposed she should be grateful for that. If there were other civilians at the outpost, then the living conditions couldn’t be too primitive. But she’d heard horror stories about some of the forward operating bases located o
n the northern and eastern perimeters of Afghanistan, particularly in regards to their vulnerability. She hadn’t planned on going to an area that was potentially dangerous. After all, she wasn’t a soldier. She had no combat training. She was a contracts geek—a desk jockey, for Pete’s sake. Her job was to meet with the defense contractors who were doing work on the various military bases and to negotiate terms and conditions for performance of that work. Aside from ensuring that the soldiers had the facilities and equipment they needed to perform their jobs, she had no military background.
“I’ve heard some of these outlying bases come under frequent attack by the Taliban,” she ventured. “Is that the case with this particular base?”
Major Dumfries gave her a reassuring smile. “You’ll be in safe hands, ma’am. We haven’t lost a civilian yet. There’s a special-operations detachment based there. They’ll keep you safe.”
Elena swiped a hand across her eyes. “I need a drink.”
She wasn’t aware she’d muttered the words aloud until she saw the amusement in the other woman’s eyes. “Alcohol is prohibited in Kuwait City, ma’am.”
“Great,” she replied. “I can’t even have a last drink before I leave civilization.”
Major Dumfries tucked the clipboard under her arm and leaned forward, glancing around to ensure they wouldn’t be overheard. “This is strictly off the record, but sometimes the U.S. embassy personnel have access to alcohol. I understand they’re having a small send-off tonight over at the hotel for some of their aides who are returning to the States.”
A party? At the hotel? That was the first positive bit of news she’d had since arriving in Kuwait City three days earlier. Since then, it seemed she’d done nothing but schlep her gear back and forth between the hotel and the military airstrip, waiting for transportation to her final destination. Which was supposed to be the Green Zone, not some scary outpost in eastern Afghanistan.
Oh, yeah, she definitely needed a drink.