One-Click Buy: September 2010 Harlequin Blaze
Page 69
It was enough to make a guy want to claim his woman in a big, public, very gossip-inducing way. Focus, Maddow. She was right to keep things private. He was leaving soon. No point in sticking her with gossipy backlash on top of everything else.
“I’m just concerned that you might be a little too…” He paused, searching for a way to explain without putting his foot in his mouth. Or anything else. “I’m worried you might be a bit too eager about the Pownter Institute.”
“Too eager?”
Her eyes narrowed. Thankfully, the suspicion wiped out that hurt look. She did start tapping her fingers, the rhythm warning him that she was losing her temper.
Alex leaned back in the chair, fighting an unexpected grin. He’d never actually seen the ice princess lose it. Would it be as hot, as sexy, as it was when she lost her cool in bed?
“Let me see if I’ve got this straight,” she clarified in precise tones. “You forced me to step outside my preferred direction for this project, shoving me way beyond my comfort zone. You practically blackmailed me into participating in the patron meetings, nagged me into courting these people who you now claim I’m too eager to work with. Why? Was that pitch a lie? Do you really not believe I’m qualified to handle this project?”
“No,” he said, grabbing her flailing hands from across the desk. “Everything I said was true. I believe in you, Drucilla. But like you said, I pushed you. I pressured and twisted this project for my own purposes. That isn’t fair to you.”
Drucilla wet her lips, nerves dancing in her eyes. She glanced away, took a breath and squared her shoulders, then met his gaze again.
“Alex, I want to do this. I’ve always taken the easy route. The safe route. Yes, I’ve aimed for success, but, you know, safe success.”
“Drucilla—”
“No, let me finish. I know I argued for the government grant. To keep things easy and pressure free. But you’ve shown me that some things are worth the risk.” She leaned closer, lifting their clasped hands to press a kiss against the back of his knuckles.
“I want to work with the Pownter Institute. I know what’s at stake,” she insisted, passion making her eyes glow, the same way they did when he touched her. “I want to take the chance. Big risks for big success. I’ll make it rock, Alex. For Trifecta. For you. And most of all, for myself.”
13
DRU FINISHED PATTING the soil around the base of the hibiscus, then leaned back on her heels to smile at the bright purple blossoms.
Gorgeous.
Nothing said security like roots, right? Even if they were plant roots.
“Drucilla, what on earth do you think you’re doing in my yard?”
Dru lost her balance and fell on her ass.
“Mom,” she greeted with a grimace as she pushed herself to her knees then brushed the dirt off her butt. “The nursery called again about the special hibiscus order, so I picked it up. I figured I’d surprise you.”
From the look of anger scrunching up her mom’s face, it was one hell of a surprise. The rip-the-tree-out-of-the-ground-and-spank-Dru-with-the-branches kind of surprise.
“You know how I feel, Drucilla. Is this your way of mocking my concerns?”
Guilt, so easily tapped, bounced right to the surface of Dru’s psyche. She had the trowel in hand and was about to dig the plant up before she even realized she’d moved.
“No,” she exclaimed. Her words were as much for her own wimpy self as they were for her mother.
It might have been the astonishment of Dru back talking or the fact that she’d back talked at such a high pitch. Either way, her mother’s face was a study in shock.
“Please, will you please just believe me, Mom,” Dru said, slowly straightening to give herself time to try to figure out what she was going to say. “Nothing is going to happen to the house. You need to stop worrying about it. I’ve got a steady job, I’m in a solid position with the lab and there’s nothing to stress about.”
Her mother clamped her arms across her chest and stared.
“Look, I’m heading up a huge project. We’re in line to receive backing from one of the biggest institutes in the country. My reputation will be made,” Dru claimed, her tone just this side of bragging.
Her mother’s glare said just this side was way too far over the line.
“Do you have a guarantee of success on this little project of yours?” Olympia asked bitterly. “Are you so positive that you’ll prove your hypothesis?”
Panic tried to worm its way into Dru’s gut. But she stood firm and refused. No. Whatever happened, she was going to have faith. In the project’s success. In her career potential. And most of all, in herself.
So Dru mirrored her mom’s arm-crossed attitude, shifting her weight to the left and setting her chin.
“There are never guarantees in science,” Dru said through gritted teeth. “You know that, Mother. Just as you know a failed hypothesis isn’t the end of a career.”
Her mother looked at her in that way she had that made Dru feel about eight years old. Stomach churning, she lifted her chin higher and tried to stop her lip from trembling.
“Just because Daddy didn’t make it doesn’t mean I’m a failure, Mother.”
“You’re your father’s daughter. You have the same eyes, the same interests, the same personality. You’re practically walking in his footsteps.”
Dru’s mouth dropped. “That’s so unfair.”
Olympia lifted her chin, then snatched up a broom and started cleaning the dirty evidence of Dru’s recent horticultural venture.
“Life isn’t fair, now, is it?”
Dru gave her mother the evil stare of rebellion, perfected in her teen years. It worked just as well now as it had then. As usual, Dru gave up after a few seconds. She puffed out a huge breath of air, then grabbed the dustpan off the potting bench.
“Why can’t you support me, Mom?” she asked quietly. “Why can’t you believe in me for once?”
The sweeping quickened, her mother’s moves getting jerky.
“I believe in this project, Mom. I’m good at what I do and I do have a solid reputation,” Dru continued, bending down to hold the dustpan in place. She blinked a few times to clear her vision, then looked up beseechingly. “I’ve been at the same lab for five years. My papers are well received. I’m heading up a major study before I’m thirty. Why can’t you see these things as the positives they are?”
The broom stilled. Dru held her breath.
“You should never count on anything,” her mother warned, sounding defeated.
Dru sucked in a shaky, tear-filled breath, then scooped up the dirt, walking slowly to the trash can as if the gloomiest rain cloud was hovering over her head.
“Come have lunch,” her mother said, holding open the screen door. “I just made a fresh batch of your favorite cinnamon-butter cookies this morning.”
Dru wanted to refuse. She wanted to go home, curl up under her bed and snivel. But as gratifying as that might be, it was also pointless. She put the dustpan away, wiped her hands on her jeans and climbed the concrete steps.
As she reached her mom, she frowned. “Fresh this morning? You didn’t know I was coming over, though.”
“I make some fresh each week,” her mother said, heading for the kitchen. “So you always have something to come home to.”
And that, Dru realized, was what it was all about. Her mom wasn’t really knocking the possibility of Dru’s successes. In her own way, her mom was just making sure Dru knew she always had somewhere, something, to depend on.
Just in case she needed it.
Overwhelmed by emotion, Dru walked over and hugged her mother. Arms wound tight, she rocked from side to side. After a brief hesitation, Olympia returned the hug, then stepped back to give her daughter a questioning look.
“That’s just a thanks,” Dru said. “You know, for the cookies.”
DRU WAS PRACTICALLY skipping as she made her way down the hall to her office. She rounded the corne
r, her head full of happy thoughts, and almost mowed down her best friend.
“Well, well,” Nikki said, laughing as she sidestepped. “Did someone get lucky last night?”
Dru’s eyes widened and she looked quickly up and down the hall before hissing at Nikki to quiet down. “I didn’t get lucky,” she whispered. “I just had a, well, a really great evening with my mom.”
Nikki’s brows shot sky-high.
“Your mom? Olympia Robichoux? She who is never satisfied?”
Dru’s lips quirked. With a roll of her eyes, she opened her office door and gestured for Nikki to precede her.
“I went over to do some gardening, then we talked. She was just as discouraging as usual.”
Nikki dropped into a chair and stared, giving Dru the when-did-you-go-crazy look.
“I finally realized none of that matters,” Dru explained as she sat opposite her friend. It’d taken her half the night to label this giddy feeling, but it was still hard to explain to someone who actually knew how negative her mother was. “My mom has her hang-ups, but they aren’t mine anymore. I believe in myself. I’ve got a solid career I love. I make a good living and have excellent prospects.”
Nikki’s grin was so big, her dimples almost disappeared. “Hmm, this sounds familiar.”
“I know. You’ve been telling me this for years. But I finally believe it,” Dru told her. “I finally believe in myself. And I also believe that the cosmic string project is actually going to make me a star.”
“A star?” Nikki looked like a proud momma whose daughter had just scored the lead role in the school play.
“Nik, I’m going to push for the Pownter Institute deal. It’s huge,” she said as butterflies danced wildly in her stomach. She leaned forward, her hands clasped as she continued. “The bar will be set to the highest rung. The accolades when we actually document the strings’ effect on hydrogen gases will be… Oh, man, enormous.”
Nikki bit her lip and gave Dru a cautious look. “I love how excited you are. I do. But have you thought this through? You know the percentage of hypotheses that fail. I’m not saying yours will, I’m just saying that maybe you should prepare yourself for all the possibilities. You know the first rule of science. Don’t become emotionally invested.”
A week ago, that kind of comment would have destroyed her confidence. But now? Everything felt solid. She was solid, dammit. Her career star was rising. Her love life was kicking ass. Even her dialogue with her mother was improving.
Which meant even if doubts were biting her in the butt, she could easily ignore them.
“I know the rule,” she acknowledged. “But you know what? This is actually one of those win-win deals, isn’t it? Having a Pownter backing listed on my résumé is impressive, regardless of the project’s outcome. Isn’t that worth taking a shot?”
Kind of like what she had going on with Alex. Somehow her career and her relationship with him had become symbolically intertwined. The better she felt about one, the more confident she was with the other. And right now, she was over the moon with both.
“It is worth taking a shot,” Nikki confirmed slowly, as if she was seeing the subtext and wasn’t sure if she should offer a double warning or just stick with business. “It definitely is. And—” Nikki’s face showed her conflicted emotions “—I don’t want to discourage your confidence in any way, shape or form.”
“But?”
“But what if the project fails?”
Subtext? What if her relationship with Alex failed? Dru’s happy mood took on a gray tinge and her stomach turned.
“I’d be fine.” She didn’t need to see Nikki’s face to know she sounded anything but certain. So she squared her shoulders, lifted her chin and stated, “My reputation is solid, my career would stand up. I might not get the accolades or the huge boost, but I’d still have a job. I’d still be secure.”
And she’d survive emotionally without Alex, as well. Sure, it’d be hard to top the incredible sex. And she might not ever connect with another guy on so many levels. But she’d be okay. She wasn’t going to start doubting herself again.
“You’re sure?” Nikki asked, as if she could read Dru’s thoughts. “You’d be okay with that?”
Dru puffed out a breath and forced herself to nod. “I am sure. I have to start believing in myself, Nik. Believing enough to give myself permission to take risks. To have faith that those risks will pay off.” She met her friend’s dark eyes and nodded. “And yes, to believe that I’m strong enough to handle whatever happens if they fail.”
Even as she said the words, she promised herself they’d be true.
ALEX CURLED HIS ARMS around Drucilla’s naked waist and sighed deeply. Oh, yeah, this was good. He breathed in the scent of her hair, letting the warmth of it relax him even more than the mind-boggling climax that’d just ripped through his body.
“We need to get moving,” Drucilla said, her words a sleepy murmur. “I’ve got a staff meeting at nine.”
“I’ve got the same meeting.” Alex pulled her closer, not ready to let go yet. “We’ve got time.”
“Not if I’m going to shower before I leave.” Her words reflected the same reluctance Alex was feeling to get up and start the day.
Probably not for the same reason, though.
He grimaced against her hair and breathed in, needing to hold on to as much of this moment as he could. Not that he didn’t think they’d have more sexy times. They would. He was sure they would. After all, their sex life wasn’t tied to work. And he’d done what was best.
At least, in his mind, it was best for Drucilla.
He hoped. The sick ball of dread in his stomach warned him that he was hoping in vain.
So just in case…
“If you need a shower, why don’t we see what kind of water games we can play to kick off the morning.”
A few extra orgasms before she found out his plans couldn’t hurt him any, right?
ALEX WATCHED DRUCILLA lead the project discussion, pulling everyone’s input into play, encouraging them to share their findings so far, as well as ideas for expanding their experimentation.
He’d been pretty well bullshitting his way through the pitch to Charlene last week when he’d raved about Drucilla’s qualifications. Oh, he’d known he was telling the truth. He just hadn’t realized how good she was at doing her job. Not just the calculations and tests, although watching her run those had led to one very memorable, rule-breaking roll on the lab floor. But now, watching her lead the group, he realized she was simply fabulous.
She encouraged her team, but still kept things on track. She had the group not only working to their fullest potential, but also excited about how far they could push the limits of testing the hypothesis.
Her smile glowed, filling the room with a bright energy that made him feel a little gooey inside. Stupid, maybe. But he just loved how she was totally into what she did.
God, he was getting sappy.
A half hour later, he was still just as sappy, and now way too turned on for a workday meeting.
“So we’re set,” Drucilla was saying as she wrapped up the meeting. As people shuffled out to start their day, Glenn held the door open, signaling that Alex and Drucilla wait to speak with him.
“A.A., good morning,” the director said when he reached the conference table. “Dr. Robichoux, how are you today?”
He took Drucilla’s vacated seat at the head of the table without a word and set down a folder, clasping his hands over it with a congenial smile.
“I’ve got wonderful news to share,” he said as Dru subtly moved her papers to the left and took that empty chair.
She shot Alex a look, sharing her amusement at Glenn’s usual obliviousness. Her expression quickly turned from humor to heat. Alex crossed one leg over the other and grimaced, the horny heading toward that unmanageable-in-company state.
“I thought we’d wind up the project meeting with a little financial powwow,” Glenn told them as he handed
them each a matching blue folder. “We’ve solidified our financial decision.”
Alex met Drucilla’s startled gaze with an infinitesimal wince. He was pretty sure what the director was about to share would eliminate Alex’s horny feelings.
Knowing what was coming, he offered Dru his most charming smile, glad to see her blink in surprise, then turn a pretty shade of pink.
Yeah, they’d be fine, he assured himself. He had everything under control. Except the sick feeling in his stomach, but that’d go away just as soon as he knew Drucilla wasn’t going to throw that folder at his head.
“The board of directors has met and considered the backing offers,” Glenn said, pushing his glasses higher on the bridge of his nose and opening his own folder. “We had a great deal to choose from, which was quite a boon for Trifecta and for which we give complete credit to A.A., his reputation and his wealthy contacts.”
Drucilla waggled her brows at him in amused recognition.
“The Pownter Institute offered an impressive package,” the director said, folding his hands on the table and smiling. “They not only are willing to buy a brand-new telescope and fund the project for two full years, but they’d welcome new project suggestions by either of you, as well.”
Drucilla’s eyes went huge and she leaned forward with her mouth open, lips glistening as if she could barely hold back her screams of joy.
“Mr. Blackstone also offered a proposal, in which he’d purchase the abandoned telescope in Mount Shasta to utilize for this project. He’d require, of course, a variety of promotional tie-ins to the telescope in return for donating it to Trifecta.”
Drucilla’s face went blank except for a hint of disdain clear in the faint wrinkle of her nose.
Well, that wasn’t a good sign.
“We’ve considered both offers carefully,” the director continued, his pedantic tone making Alex want to yell at him to hurry up and get this over with. “And taken into account both the good of the lab as well as the strong backing of our guest, Dr. Maddow.”