Indulge

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Indulge Page 113

by Liv Morris


  “I want you to stay,” he repeats. “I’ve never done this before, so I don’t know how all this works. I just know I want you here with me. I want you to stay here as often as you want to, even if that’s every night.” He softly pushes some hair behind my ears. “I know you’re probably worried and want to be cautious, but I’m being honest. I would never lie to you, Angel. Never. I only want you.”

  I shake my head. “You’ve already lied to me, Slade. How do I know you won’t do it again?” I whisper, looking down at the floor. He had lied to me about Jax and Bridgette, but can I really hold that against him? What would I have done if I had been in that situation? Would I have told someone I didn’t know that their boyfriend was cheating on them over the phone?

  He places a hand under my chin, and pulls my face to look up at him. “I’m sorry for that, Angel. I never meant to hurt you, or for you to get hurt. I will never lie to you again.” He straightens himself up and takes both of my hands gently in his. “I know I don’t have a clue of what I’m doing here, and you deserve someone who does, but I want to be that person. I want to try for you. You make me want to be someone better. I want to have a relationship with you, Angel. Please give me that chance, and tell me you want that too.”

  Are we ready for a relationship? I mean, Jax and I took our time becoming friends first before we took the step for a relationship. Yeah, but look at how that turned out. Would this relationship end differently? Yes. It would. I already know I would be much more heart broken when it ends with Slade. The way he looks at me as if I’m something special. The way he is always touching my face or tangling his hands in my hair. The way he speaks to me, whether it’s soft and sweet or vulgar and demanding. This man holds the power to bring me to my knees as I beg for more, and that’s just what he offered me. More. I would be dumb not to take it, even if I know the outcome is a broken heart.

  “Okay,” I whisper.

  He smiles that breathtaking smile that reaches his eyes, brings my hands to his mouth, and kisses them as he still holds them in his hands, then he releases them, bringing his hands to my face as he kisses me softly. So softly that my heart melts. I place my hands on both his forearms while his hands are still on my face.

  “You make me so happy, Angel. So happy.” He kisses me again, showing me just how happy I make him. He pulls away, eyeing me carefully. “I’m working from home today because I want to take care of you. I need to be here. With you.”

  “What?” I look up at him. “You didn’t have to do that. You could have just taken me home.”

  “What kind of boyfriend would I be if I took you home when you needed me?” He smiles a slow sexy smile. My heart rate picked up when he mentioned boyfriend. Wow! This infamous playboy is all mine!

  Well, for right now anyway.

  “I do have to get some work done today.” He leaves the bathroom for a second and returns, reaching out his hand with a pill in it. “Take this.”

  “I don’t need that. I feel much better already.”

  “That’s why you need to take it. You may feel better, but you’re not completely healed. You’ll start doing too much too soon.”

  “I don’t like the way it makes me feel,” I whine.

  “Take it.” His eyes get hard and his jaw clenches. It’s pointless to argue with him. I just take it from his hand and swallow it. “Good girl.” He kisses me on the forehead before he heads back to his office.

  The rest of the day goes by in a blur. I lay on the couch in his media room watching T.V. and falling in and out of sleep while Slade works in his office. I wake feeling groggy and disoriented as Slade carries me to the bedroom. I snuggle closer to him. “What time is it?” I whisper.

  “A little past nine.” He lays me down on his bed. “I’m going to work from home tomorrow and Wednesday. I don’t have to be in the office until Thursday. Okay?” He cups my cheek in his hand as I lay down looking up at him through heavy eyes.

  “Okay.” I’m so tired, I’m not going to argue. I roll over and fall asleep as I hear Slade go to his bathroom.

  The next morning, I wake up to Slade lying in bed next to me. As I open my eyes, I drink in the sight of him. He’s wearing a white wife beater tank with gray sweatpants. He’s lying down with two pillows propped up under his head. He’s got his fingers laced together behind his head, causing the muscles in his arm to bulge out. His legs are crossed at the ankle, and he’s barefoot. I follow where he is looking to see that he has the TV on ESPN, but the volume is muted.

  “You can turn the volume up,” I rasp out.

  He turns his head to look at me as a smile forms on his face. “I didn’t want to wake you,” He says softly.

  “You’re fine.”

  “Here” He reaches over to his nightstand, producing a bottle of water for me. I greedily take a drink and hand it back to him.

  “Thanks.”

  He takes a drink himself then places the drink on the nightstand, then lays back down. He pulls me over to him. I lay in the crook of his arm, placing my head and hand on his chest. I listen to his slow and steady heartbeat.

  “I thought you had to work today?” I look up at him.

  “I worked most of last night while you slept.” I nod my head, then lay it back down on his chest. “I got a phone call today from Officer Kent. He said that they found Matt had some priors in Louisiana for an assault against an officer, so he’s going away for quite a while.”

  “That’s good.” Stupid bastard. If I see him hitting Slade again, I’ll kick him in the balls.

  “I thought so.” His right arm pulls me in tighter as his fingers rub little circles on my arm. I lay there with him, watching ESPN as the silence fills the room. It’s not uncomfortable, though. I could lay like this forever. I sigh and close my eyes.

  “Angel?”

  “Yes?” I keep my eyes closed.

  “Can I ask you a question?” He asks cautiously.

  “Sure,” I say slowly.

  I feel his hand sweep the hair off the back of my neck, and his fingers lightly brush over my tattoo. I swallow, knowing what the question is going to be.

  “Will you tell me about your tattoo for your dad?” he asks quietly.

  I take in a deep breath and slowly release it before I speak. “I got it the week after he passed. I was so heartbroken. Everyone kept saying it would get better with time that the hurt would go away, but I didn’t want it to. I didn’t want to forget about him. I guess in my own little twisted way, I felt I needed to brand myself with ink to remind myself of what I had lost. I wanted something to visualize what I was going through, so I got half of a hollow heart because a piece of me had died.”

  Slade is quiet for a moment. “I’ve been thinking about your dad ever since you told me he taught you how to fight. And I was wondering…why did you sell your dad’s company and go off to college instead of running it?”

  He sounds this like this has been bugging him. I don’t like to talk much about my past. One parent is dead, and the other acts like I’m dead. What else is there to say? I guess we have to have these conversations, though. We are a couple now.

  I lay there with my eyes closed, thinking I shouldn’t keep anything from him. He is my boyfriend, and I want him to know he can tell me anything if he needs to.

  I open my eyes, but don’t move. “My dad left me letters. Letters concerning the company. They explained to me that he didn’t want to hold me back in life by running it. He wanted me to sell it and go to college to become whatever I wanted.

  “At first, I wasn’t going to sell it. I thought about keeping it. That company meant the world to him. It felt bad to give it away. I don’t know. I think if I would have kept it, maybe my mom would have never quit talking to me. She never came out and said it, but I think that’s what made her the maddest. That I sold it. Like I just threw it away.”

  “When exactly did she stop talking to you?”

  “She started acting weird a couple of months before dad had died, but i
t wasn’t until a few months after, that’s when we got in a huge fight that changed everything.

  I was in the kitchen making a sandwich when she came barging through the front door. I could tell she had been crying, but she seemed to be more mad than sad. She came in the kitchen, yelling about how my dad shouldn’t have left it to me, a child. She just could not grasp the concept of him giving it to me.”

  “I said some horrible things,” I sigh. “Asked her why not me? Who else would he leave it to? Her? It wasn’t like he owed her anything. I called her a bitch along with a few other choice words. I told her I was selling it, and that I was going to go out of state for college. That I didn’t want to be around her anymore.” I shake my head lightly. “I’ll never forget the hurt in her eyes when I said that. She just nodded her head, and said that was for the best, and walked out the front door. We didn’t speak after that.”

  “Towards the end of my school year, I was having second thoughts. I didn’t want to leave her. No matter how mad we were at one another, she was still my mom. You only have one mom. I was going to tell her I was sorry at graduation, but she never came. I was so mad at her. How could she be so mad at me over a situation I had no control over? Like I asked for my dad to die?” I angrily brush a tear off my face. “I went out after graduation and got trashed with Courtney. The next day when I went home, she wasn’t there, so I packed a bag and took off for Texas.”

  “It must have been hard, being somewhere new not knowing anyone.” He runs his fingers through my hair.

  “It was hard,” I nod against his chest. “I was terrified. There wasn’t a day that went by where I didn’t want to call her and beg her to forgive me...to love me again. I finally broke down and called her...she didn’t answer. I left her a message, telling her I was sorry and that I loved her. She never called back. I thought if I sent her money that maybe that would help her feelings towards me, so I sent her a check. It became a habit. Calling her every month and sending a check, but it hasn’t changed a thing,” I say sadly.

  He removes his arm from me as I lay down on the bed. My eyes are still closed, but I feel his weight shift and his hands on either side of my face.

  “Open your eyes, Angel.” I open them and my vision is blurry from the tears filling up my eyes. They slowly run out the side of my eyes on to my cheeks before Slade brushes them away.

  “You mean you still call her every month, along with the check you send her?” His eyes are hard, and his jaw is clenched. I nod. “She just disowned you? All over what? Some money!”

  “A lot of money,” I whisper.

  “How much money could you possibly have gotten for her to just let you go?” he asks sarcastically.

  “12 million dollars,” I whisper.

  He frowns as he shakes his head. “I’m so sorry, Angel. No amount of money is worth losing you.”

  I keep my face blank. I feel a little shocked that he didn’t react to my money. I’ve always tried to keep how much I had got a secret. People tend to treat you differently when they find out you have money.

  He leans down and gives me a sweet kiss. “You need some rest, Angel.” He pulls away and reaches in his nightstand. “Take this.”

  “Slade, I don’t need that.” How many times is he going to give me these freaking pills?

  “It wasn’t a question.” I stare up at it. “Take it,” he demands.

  I snatch it from his hand as he reaches over grabbing the bottle of water off his night stand handing it to me. After I swallow the pill, he kisses my forehead.

  “Get some rest, Angel.” He lays down next to me, pulling me underneath his arm as I cuddle up to his side.

  I could never get enough of being in his arms.

  Chapter Twelve

  As I stare at the muted TV, all I can think about is Angel cuddled up next to me. No wonder she is so strong. She had to be. Someone weak would have been broken in two. What kind of parent just quits talking to their child? She had just lost her father, for fuck’s sake. She needed her mother more than she probably ever had.

  I look over at Angel and notice she has fallen fast asleep. I know she is feeling better, but I just don’t want her up and around doing too much. With a sigh, I relax into the bed and close my eyes, not waking until I hear the doorbell. I lift my head and move out from underneath Angel gently so I can answer the door.

  I open the door for the delivery man.

  “Hi, I’m delivering a door for...Mr. Long.” He looks down at his clipboard.

  “That’s me.”

  “Okay, where is it going?” He turns and signals someone to bring the door in.

  “I was wondering, can you just leave the door? I would like to install it myself.” The guy raises his brows, and for a few seconds he just stands there, looking at me. Finally, he nods his head.

  “Yeah...you can do that.” He doesn’t sound very sure, though.

  “Thanks.” I sign my name and hand him the clipboard.

  I don’t want them in the bedroom while Angel is asleep, and since I gave her that pill she will be sleeping most of the day and through tonight. They bring the door into the entry way and lean it up against the wall before leaving. As I shut the front door, I hear my phone ringing back in the bedroom. Shit, who could that be? I take off in a mad dash to get it before it wakes Angel up.

  “Hey what’s up?” I say when I see Josh’s name on the caller ID.

  “Not much. I called your work, and they said you were working from home today and tomorrow. Everything ok?”

  “Yeah, I just didn’t want to leave Angel. She says she’s better, but I think she still needs a couple of days resting.”

  “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

  “Are you at work?” I sit down on my brown leather couch in the living room.

  “No, I’m grabbing a burger. You want me to grab you something and bring it to you?”

  “I’m not very hungry, and Angel is asleep. I’m in the living room. My new bedroom door was delivered when you were calling.” I pick up the remote and turn on the TV.

  I had filled him in on my outburst and the entire door incident yesterday when he called. I was working, and Angel was sleeping in the media room. He wasn’t surprised. He and I were once in a fight at a party before I had left for college. Me and the man I was fighting both went through a door. The guy had thought I had fucked his girlfriend. Turned out I had fucked her twin sister, who the guy was also fucking. That was quite a drama filled party. “You had your door delivered?” He laughs. “Do I even want to know why you didn’t just go and get it like any other man?” He laughs again.

  “For your information...” I laugh at myself, “I didn’t want to leave Angel here alone, but I wanted to get it fixed as soon as possible.”

  “I still can’t believe you punched that door.” He chuckles. Glad he finds it funny. “Are they installing it right now?’’

  “Nope. I wouldn’t let them. I can do it myself.” I lie back on the couch and put my feet up on the coffee table.

  “Okay. I will come over and help you put it up. I’ll be there in about twenty minutes.”

  “Thanks. See you then.” I hang up and click through the channels, but my mind wanders to Angel. A smile forms on my face, she is all mine. She belongs to me and no one else. It makes me happy knowing I’m the only one to kiss her, touch her. To have her sexually. I can’t wait until she is healed and I can take her the way I have been craving. She brings out an animal in me that craves to dominate her. I sigh as I lean my head back and close my eyes.

  “You okay, Slade?”

  I really need to start locking my door. I open my eyes to Josh standing in my living room with a sack of food in one hand, and a twenty four pack in the other.

  I look at my watch. “Twenty minutes, huh?” Have I really been sitting here forty five minutes?

  “Yeah, I took a detour and stopped for some beer.” He lifts up the twenty four pack of Bud Light. “And, being the nice friend that I am, I grabbed y
ou a sandwich and some fries.” He smiles, holding up the other bag he’s carrying.

  “Thanks. I’m actually hungry now.”

  He sits down in the recliner next to the couch, and I take a good look at him. He actually looks okay today. I don’t see any marks or bruises on his face, and he looks like he showered and put clean clothes on. It’s not that he normally doesn’t, or that he has poor hygiene, but he’s just not been himself. He used to be the one in a serious relationship. We were partying buddies until he met his ex, and for a year he never wanted to go out or drink. We would still talk daily, but we didn’t hang out every day like we used to. His ex hated me. Said I was a bad influence. Whatever. She was a bitch and a whore, so the hatred was mutual.

  “How are you doing, Josh?”

  “Not as good as you,” he jokes, handing me my sandwich and fries.

  “I’m serious. I just want to make sure you’re doing alright.” His hand freezes midway to his mouth as it holds his burger.

  “What?” I pick up a fry and toss it in my mouth.

  “You! Are you going to give me relationship advice too? Tell me that I need to find someone?” He lifts an eyebrow.

  I shake my head. “I’m the last one to give relationship advice. I’m only a day into my first one.” We both laugh.

  “So, it’s official? You two are together?” Josh asks through a bite of food.

  “Yeah,” I nod while opening my beer.

  He chuckles as he shakes his head.

  “What?” I ask.

  “Nothing, but you better not fuck it up. She may kick your ass.” He laughs.

  I nod, knowing she would do just that. I wouldn’t do anything to fuck up what I have with Angel. She is someone special, and when you find something that special you don’t let it go. Ever!

  “So, how is work going? You guys staying busy?” Josh and his dad own a chain of jewelry stores here in St. Louis.

  “Yeah, the stores are doing really well. Dad said he wants to open one up in St. Charles. So I may be going there sometime next week to look at some spaces for sale.” He takes a drink of beer.

 

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