“I swear, I won’t.” Guinevere moved toward the door. “Looks like I have to face the dragon one more time. Thank you, again.”
When she was gone, Morgan turned to her. “So, spill.”
Aphrodite was wide-eyed. “What do you mean?”
“You know exactly what I mean. I know Ares has been on the island. I can feel him. And you don’t have the look of a woman recently laid like tile. Aeron has been here, but not here, if you get my drift.”
“The drift has definitely made its point.” Aphrodite huffed, and all trace of the benevolent all-knowing goddess was gone. In its place was a very frustrated woman. “Ares won’t take the hint. I looked, Morgan.” She sighed heavily and flopped back on the large bed.
“You look looked?”
Aphrodite nodded miserably. “Yeah. He’s supposed to end up with Morrigan. Do you know her?”
“Not really. Never made the effort. I used to get her mail and she’d get mine. We were confused for a lot of mythology. But she seems like a meaner version of me, if that’s possible.”
“She’s like me and you, if we made one awesome goddess. Being both hearth and war, she’s perfect for Ares.” Aphrodite exhaled heavily.
“Are you okay?” Morgan asked, concern tinging her voice.
“I guess. I mean, I’m the Goddess of Love, with the capital letters. So that means when Love works out like it’s supposed to, it increases my power. It makes something click inside me that’s a bliss unlike anything else. But it’s Ares. I always thought we were forever and we’re not. All those years, wasted. There’s no part of my history that he hasn’t been there for. When we were godlings, he’d tie knots in my braids and I’d make him fall in love with his swords.”
Morgan smiled. “And you’ll always have that. Even if he warmongers off with Morrigan.”
“I know. I can’t even say I don’t like it, I guess I don’t know how to feel.”
“I know what you mean.”
“I’m sure you do. How’s the hookup with Lance coming along? Must be interesting if you were bringing Guinevere to see me.”
“I can’t even talk about it. It’s a great big bag of crap and honestly, I just want to put a tie on it and put it in the corner.”
“So, we have to smell it, but you don’t want to think about it?” If it was crap, the best thing to do was dump it like kitty litter.
“Pretty much. Just for now.”
“Do you want me to look?” Aphrodite was dying to know what happened. She was sure that Lance loved her friend. He’d always had a thing for Morgan. He’d always been pissed he had a thing for her, but it had been there nonetheless.
“What do you mean? Look to see if he loves me? Goddess, no. Not in a million years. And no, I don’t want you to make him love me, either.” Morgan eyed her like she would a child who’d gotten caught with her hand in the cookie jar.
Aphrodite liked that about her. Morgan had never been intimidated by her. In fact, Aphrodite doubted Morgan would be intimidated by Zeus himself standing hip to hip with the Cronus and the Kraken.
“Why not? I can help you, so let me. I swear, you’re the only person in any dimension who hasn’t taken advantage of being my friend.” Aphrodite really wanted to do this for Morgan.
“And I never will.” Morgan replied gently.
“But…but I want you to.”
“Get over it.” Her friend grinned. “I really don’t want to know. Right now, I can still hope.”
“What if I told you that Lance would love you?”
“Then I’d find a way to screw it up. I really don’t want to know. Really.” Morgan said emphatically. “Plus, I’m not going to let you use this thing with me to hide from your own issues.”
Aphrodite sagged. “Damn it, why not?”
“Well, what about a compromise?” A mischievous grin curved Morgan’s mouth.
“You look like you’re about to suggest some real trouble. I’m in.” Aphrodite mirrored her expression. She was better at meddling in other people’s love lives than handling her own anyway. Not that she’d ever admit it out loud. After all, who wanted to deal with a Goddess of Love who didn’t know her ass from a gopher hole? Not her, that was for sure.
Morgan laughed and she sounded very much like the wicked witch she claimed to be. “Good. Since my relationships are out and you don’t want to talk about yours, how about we stir the pot in Mordred’s? He needs it.”
“Oh!” Aphrodite gasped. “I’ve been so busy I forgot to update you on what happened to him. The curse that pissed me off when I got here? I’m sure Artemis told you, it was Vivienne.”
Morgan raised a brow. “Oh really?”
“Yes. And she didn’t just piss me off. She pissed Mordred off too.”
“What did she do to my son?” Suddenly, Morgan was all avenging lioness of doom. “He’s paid Vivienne’s price more times than any one person should ever have to.”
Aphrodite gave a delicate shrug. “He might have earned it this time.”
Morgan’s eyes narrowed. Aphrodite had never seen one woman express so much with just a subtle shift of her eyes. She definitely had the bearing of a goddess.
“Oh really?”
“He pretended to be Arthur and played at seducing her until she surrendered. Then he revealed himself.”
“She had it coming. But I think, maybe, he might have earned it, too. What did she do and can I fix it?”
“She cursed him to fall in love with the next woman he kissed.”
“Which I’m really hoping was Artemis.”
“Actually, it was. Convenient, yes?” Aphrodite grinned. “And I cursed Vivienne for what she did.”
“Can you maybe not? She’s the Lady of the Lake, Keeper of Avalon. We kind of need her magick.”
“Oh no. She’s lost her magick. You are the new Lady of the Lake. In fact, the power should hit you any minute.”
Morgan closed her eyes. “I… fuck.”
“What’s the problem?”
“The problem is that Vivienne is Lance’s mother. So basically, she lost her job and it’s my fault. Great.”
“Uh, how is it your fault?”
“Because… just because.” Morgan couldn’t articulate exactly why it was her fault, but Aphrodite could see where she was coming from and how Lance would think that. But damn it all anyway, Vivienne wasn’t a goddess and she shouldn’t be trespassing on goddess territory. The world was bigger than Avalon and Aphrodite was bound and determined to teach her that lesson.
“I was just giving Artemis the I’m Going To Be Your Mother-In-Law talk and here I go and screw it up with Vivienne.”
“I will smite her so hard if she blames you. She did this to herself, Morgan. To. Her. Self. You’ve served her and Avalon faithfully for almost all of your life. I really don’t think she’s going to blame you. And you should have heard the curses she hurled at Guinevere when Lance brought her home instead of you. She’d planned for you to end up together. I know she loves her son and you. If she didn’t, the curse I hit her with would’ve been much nastier, I promise you.”
Morgan sighed. “Looks like even meddling in other people’s affairs, our own crap still finds the light of day.”
“Let’s get back to Mordred. If he asks me to lift the curse, what do you want me to do?”
“It would just figure that he had to antagonize the one woman whose magick could really screw up his day.” Morgan shook her head. “But he was always like that. I’m sure by now he’s figured out that I threw Artemis at him. How does she feel about all of this?”
“I don’t think she knows. She definitely doesn’t want to fall for him just because he’s first. I can see that in yellow highlighter all over her aura.”
“As much as I love my son, it might do him good to have his heart broken. It’s never happened before.”
“Most mothers wish for their children to never experience heartache. Why would you wish that on him?”
“So he knows what it feel
s like to be on the other end of his schemes. As I said, I love my son, but he’s been a weapon his whole life. It’s time he learned how to live. Pain is sometimes a part of that. I wish it wasn’t, because he’s had enough suffering. Just not the kind that teaches the good lessons.”
Aphrodite smiled. “You know, I think it’s past time that you became Lady of the Lake. Vivienne hasn’t been willing or able to teach her followers these things for a long time.”
“I don’t want it, Aphrodite. I really don’t.”
“Which is why it’s yours. That’s how these things work.”
“Well, we’re magickal beings. We can un-work them.”
“Un-work? Is that even a thing?”
“It could be,” Morgan insisted.
“Fine. Want to help me figure out how to tame a dragon?”
“Is that a euphemism?” Morgan grinned.
“Actually, yes. And no. Ares and I are over and things are going well for Artemis, so I decided maybe Aeron might be a nice distraction.”
“What’s the problem?”
“His dragon.”
Morgan snort-giggled. “You’re kidding me, right?”
“No. He fed me some line about how his dragon wants me and—”
“His dragon. Goddess, that’s as bad as love gun.”
Aphrodite realized this was payback for her conversation with Artemis on her birthday. Love gun. Swinging Dick Stick of Doom. Purple-headed womb ferret… “At least he didn’t say his anaconda.”
“Yes, thank you, Sir Mix A Lot.”
They giggled. “But really, what’s a goddess to do to get a little tail?”
“The answer is rather simple.” Morgan smiled at her. “To tame the dragon, you should become one. Literally.”
20
VIVIENNE
F or Vivienne, it was as if her very soul had been torn from her body.
And maybe it had been.
For so long, Avalon had been part of her. She’d tried to live her office, to be nothing more than Lady of the Lake because in her heart, she’d been so much less.
She didn’t know if she was being punished or rewarded.
“Vivienne? What happened?” Hector asked, his palm cupped her cheek.
“I—I’m no longer Lady of the Lake. My magick is gone.” She held up her hands and looked at them as if they didn’t belong to her. Yes, she’d thought that the mantle was too much to bear and so it had been taken from her.
But without it, what was she?
Who was she?
She looked to Hector, as if he somehow had the answer. “Without Avalon, who am I?”
“You are not without Avalon. You’re still here. You still walk upon the green summer grasses, you still breathe the sweet air, and if you go outside, you’ll still look up at the same sky. Avalon is in your blood as much as you are within her shores. Magick or no.”
Suddenly, her little cottage was cloying, suffocating. It was as if she had to run outside to see if she did indeed breathe the same air, could feel the grasses under her toes and look upon the perpetually blue sky.
Vivienne ran outside and the warm sun cascading warm and gentle over her face. She inhaled deeply, smelling apples and grass, and a newness she couldn’t name. Looking up into the sky, she did see the oceans of infinite blue above her.
All was the same.
Yet, everything was different.
Hector emerged behind her, silent and strong. Always the protector—even now.
“I remember when the priestesses came for me. I was terrified and hopeful all at once.” Vivienne bit her lip, but that didn’t stop the tide of memory that washed over her.
“How old were you?” he asked, inviting her to continue her tale.
“I was ten when they took me as a novice. Back in those days, the Priestesses of Avalon had more sway than any king or lord. If they’d said for the sake of the people I was to go, then I would go.” Vivienne sighed. “But I can’t say I didn’t want it. As soon as I was old enough to know of Avalon, or the powerful, educated women who basked in the light of Avalon, I wanted to be one. I looked around my village, at the lives of my mother, my sisters, and I never wanted that. They were all old before their time, pushing one squalling child after another into a world of violence, darkness, and strife. I was so sure that if I could just be a priestess, I could change all of it.”
“And you did, Vivienne.” His expression was tender.
“How did I do that? I brought down an empire. I ruined my son’s life. I—”
Hector interrupted her. “You of all people know that there is always free will. You may have set the stage, you may have even provided some direction, but always, the choice lies with those who acted. Not you. Morgan chose to seduce Arthur and bear his child. Arthur chose to be seduced. Lance fell in love with Gwen, and she with him. They both chose what happened next. You did not choose for them. Stop owning their blame.”
“At least if I own their blame, I can do something useful.”
“You said yourself Camelot was a dream and it was something golden and pure for man to aspire to. It wasn’t meant to last. And yet, when you look in the world, can you not see your influence? Arthur’s story inspires so many to do more, to be more. You would change that?”
“I don’t know,” Vivienne confessed. “What if Camelot hadn’t fallen?”
“Nothing lasts forever, Vivienne. Everything that is born must die.”
“Why? We’re here. We were born and living on Avalon, we will never die.”
“Change comes to all things, even Avalon.” He took her hand. “Come, let me show you.”
An unreasonable terror knifed through her. She pulled away. “No. I can’t.”
He grabbed her, his strong arms trapping her against him. “Why not?”
Her mind clouded as her brain could only focus on the hot steel of his hand on her back, the stone wall of his chest, and the fire that flared between them.
“Let me go.” She struggled against him.
“No, Vivienne.”
“You wouldn’t have dared this if I still had my magick,” she said in a low tone, fighting panic.
“You didn’t need this from me when you still had your magick.”
“I don’t want you.” She shoved uselessly at his biceps.
He laughed, but it wasn’t the warm sound that sent shivers up and down her spine. It was cold and mirthless. Then he whispered against her ear, “You made that plainly obvious when you called out for Arthur instead of me when it was me between your thighs. I’ve already told you, I’ve accepted my penance. Perhaps this is yours. But instead of accepting it, you’re hiding from it. I never knew you to be a coward, Vivienne.”
“I told you that you didn’t know me at all,” she whispered. He was right. She was a coward. She always had been. Deep down underneath all of her bluster, she was afraid of everything. Vivienne didn’t need him to say it for her to know that it was true.
He released her, disgust twisting his handsome features. “Maybe I don’t. But you may take cold comfort in this, my lady. If you don’t have the strength of character to meet change, you aren’t strong enough to engineer anyone’s fate. Least of all the shining beacon that was Camelot. Let your conscious be clear of that.”
Hector said this last as if he were spitting out something foul. And it cut her somehow. He’d never spoken a harsh word to her, never displayed any emotion when he was around her except service, loyalty and devotion. In short, she was an ass. She shouldn’t have said those things, shouldn’t have said that she didn’t want him because it wasn’t true. She was only trying to hurt him, she’d lashed out like a dog backed into a corner. And that was ridiculous. He’d only been trying to reassure her, to show her things that he thought would comfort her. Instead, they’d scared her even more.
“Hector, I—”
He held up his hand to stay her. “No. You spoke the words you meant to speak. And I did the same. There is no apology needed for truth.”
“The set to your shoulders. The frown on your lips.” He watched her intently for a moment. “The soft pity in your eyes.”
“Maybe the pity was for myself.”
“Most assuredly.” He nodded. “We’re both wretched creatures this day.”
“You were right. I am afraid. I’m terrified.”
“I know.” His voice was soft again. “And perhaps I pushed too hard. You’ve just lost your magick. I imagine it’s like your sword and armor. I would be lost and I admit, even afraid, without my own.”
Goddess, he was just too perfect. Even in his flaws, he was an ideal.
Her words were a dagger that had stuck home. She knew she’d hurt him, and it was her aim to hurt him so he’d stop, but she should’ve known that even if she hurt him, she’d never sway him from what he thought was his duty. Now, they’d been spoken and she couldn’t take them back. He already believed he wasn’t good enough, and that was her doing as well. She had to try to fix this. “I was only trying to hurt you. I was afraid.” She looked down at her hands, unable to face him. “I still am.”
“Your words will not make me leave you. I vowed myself to you again after your magick was gone. I am, and will always be, your champion. Lady of the Lake, or not.” He reached out slowly and lifted her chin so she looked into his eyes. “Lover or not.”
“Hector,” she began, but she was at an utter loss. Vivienne knew that was the truth of it, but she also know that she didn’t deserve his loyalty, or his devotion.
Instead of saying anything else, she turned her face into the palm of his hand. Goddess, but his hands were a thing of wonder. So strong, but so gentle. He touched her as if she were a butterfly he knew he could crush.
And he could.
Now that she was without her magick, she was defenseless against him, or anyone else who sought to do her harm.
Mordred.
The spell she’d cast on him had been broken. Oh, when he discovered Vivienne was powerless—fear reared again, a King Cobra whose fangs dripped with venom. Mordred was what she’d made of him, a weapon who’d been wrought only for destruction.
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