by Sarah Morgan
‘I can’t believe this.’ Jenny ran a hand across her face and took several deep breaths. ‘I.’ She struggled with tears and Evanna reached across to borrow Logan’s phone.
‘Janet?’ She quickly spoke to the receptionist. ‘Can you come and take Helen and show her some interesting toys, please? It’s very boring in here for her and she’s finished the colouring Logan gave her.’
Jenny shot her a grateful look and moments later Janet appeared, a wide smile on her motherly features. ‘You come with your Aunty Janet. I’ve all the plants to water and I really need some help,’ she said happily, holding out a hand to Helen, who scrambled to her feet and glanced towards her mother doubtfully.
‘You go, sweetie,’ Jenny breathed, her smile just a little forced. ‘Help Janet with the plants. Then Mummy will come and get you.’
Helen slipped her hand into Janet’s and went without protest.
Jenny reached into her bag for a tissue. ‘That was kind of you,’ she whispered, blowing her nose hard. ‘You try so hard to protect them, don’t you? And then something like this happens. I’m sorry to be a baby, but it’s such a shock.’
‘I can understand that.’ Logan’s voice was kind, his gaze sympathetic. ‘But I’d really like you to try not to worry until you know exactly what there is to worry about. That’s easier said than done, I know, because once you’re a parent all hope of being calm and rational goes out of the window.’
‘Do you have children?’
Logan gave a crooked smile. ‘Little girl. Thirteen months. So I know all about parental worry.’
‘Oh. Yes.’ Jenny blew her nose again. ‘So what happens now?’
‘I’d like to ring a good friend of mine who is a paediatric cardiologist. He’ll arrange for you to have those tests that I described. Then you come back to me and we’ll talk.’
‘But you definitely think there’s something wrong with her heart.’
‘Yes, I do,’ Logan said quietly, ‘and I’m not going to lie to you about that. But she’s a bonny little girl who has obviously done very well up until now. This may be something that is easily solved. They may even decide to wait and do nothing.’
Jenny was still struggling with tears. ‘My husband, Bobbie, is away so I can’t even talk to him.’
Logan leaned forward and covered her hand with his. ‘You can talk to us,’ he said gruffly, glancing towards Evanna. ‘Anything. Any time.’
Jenny gave a dismissive laugh. ‘You’re suggesting I make an appointment just to discuss how worried I am about my daughter’s heart?’
‘Yes. Why wouldn’t you? Being a GP is about caring for the whole family.’ Logan’s eyes were kind. ‘Let’s have those tests done and then talk again. If there are any decisions to be made, I’ll help you weigh up all the pros and cons.’
‘You’re incredibly kind.’ Janet shook her head. ‘I—I’m just not used to having a GP who encourages me to come back. The practice we were in before had eighteen GPs. I never saw the same person twice and they were never interested in anything other than hurrying me out of the door as fast as possible.’
Logan nodded. ‘Different pace of life,’ he said easily, ‘and different priorities. Glenmore is a small community, Jenny. And when you moved here, you became part of that. I’m going to call the cardiologist now and I’ll phone you with an appointment time. Will you be able to get her to the mainland?’
‘Oh, yes, I have a car and I travel across once a week anyway, to see my sister.’
‘Good. Here’s my home number and my mobile.’ Logan scribbled on a piece of paper. ‘Call me if you need to. Otherwise I’ll see you when we have some results.’
Jenny slipped the piece of paper into her bag and stood up. ‘Thank you.’ She looked at Evanna and gave a faltering smile. ‘And thank you, too.’
‘You’re very welcome.’
Evanna took Jenny to find her daughter and then returned to Logan. ‘You really think she has a heart defect?’
‘Yes. But obviously it needs to be confirmed by the cardiologist. She needs an echo.’
Evanna looked at him. ‘But now that it’s just you and me—tell me what you think.’
He didn’t hesitate. ‘I think she has an ASD. Atrial septal defect.’ He was sure and confident. ‘The second heart sound is split. It’s fairly characteristic.’
‘But why hasn’t it been picked up before now?’
‘There are often no symptoms in early childhood. But in Helen’s case I’m fairly sure that her breathlessness, the chest infections and the fact that her weight is below the tenth percentile …’ He shrugged. ‘I could be wrong.’
‘You’re not usually wrong, Logan,’ Evanna murmured, and he studied her for a long moment.
‘Are you leading my fan club?’
‘You’re a good doctor. You don’t need me to tell you that. So what will they do? Surgery? Or did I read somewhere that they sometimes close on their own?’
‘It’s unlikely that Helen’s will close on its own. By the time a child has reached the age of three it’s extremely unlikely that it will sort itself out, and she’s five and a half.’
‘Which means surgery, then.’
‘Not necessarily. There are some new techniques that can be done by an interventional cardiologist, rather than a surgeon. Basically they attach a device to a catheter and they can put it in place without having to stop the heart.’
Evanna pulled a face. ‘Which still sounds scary when it’s a child. Poor Jenny. And her husband away, too. How quickly can you get her an appointment?’
‘I’m going to call him now.’ Logan opened a file on the computer and scrolled down a list of phone numbers. ‘We worked together in London and he’s a really bright guy. I’m hoping he can fit her in this week. Did you call the hospital about Sonia?’
‘Yes. They’re very happy with her. Baby is a bit jaundiced so they’re going to keep her in for a few days but they hope she’ll be home by the middle of the week.’
‘A good outcome, then.’ Logan reached for the phone and then looked at her. ‘You asked me about the beach barbecue, but what about you? Are you going?’
Did she want to spend the evening watching him with another woman? The answer was very definitely no, but to not go would draw attention to herself. And anyway she lived on an island. No matter how she felt about Logan, she had to get on with her life. ‘I’m going.’
The beach was big enough, she reassured herself. There would be volleyball and football and a barbecue going, not to mention swimming. It should be easy enough not to have to stand staring at him.
CHAPTER NINE
EVANNA spent Saturday afternoon getting ready for the beach barbecue in her new bathroom. She opened the windows and lay in a deep bubble bath, soaking away the stresses of the week and enjoying the view of the sea. There couldn’t be many people lucky enough to have a view of the sea from their bathroom, she thought to herself when she finally eased herself out of the suds and reached for a towel.
She dried her hair and put on her bikini, knowing that the evening usually began with a swim. The she pulled on a halter-neck sundress in a deep shade of blue and slid her feet into pretty flip-flops. There was no point in considering elaborate footwear when she knew from experience that she’d be spending most of the evening barefoot.
Her doorbell rang just as she was pushing a towel into a raffia bag.
It was Kyla. ‘Ethan and I thought we’d give you a lift.’
Evanna picked up her key and pulled the door closed. ‘How many people are coming, do you know?’
‘Everyone. How’s Sonia—have you heard?’
They walked to the car and Evanna smiled at Ethan who was lounging in the driver’s seat, a pair of dark glasses shielding his eyes. ‘Sonia is doing very well.’ She squashed into the back seat of Ethan’s sports car. ‘She came out on Wednesday and I’ve already seen her in Meg’s, chatting to Lucy and feeding the baby.’
‘Those two will have a lot in common. Quit
e nice, really.’ Kyla checked her lipstick in the mirror. ‘A sort of ready-made support group. And how was Logan? I expected him to be traumatised but he’s actually seemed quite buoyant all week.’
Evanna fastened her seat belt. And she knew why that was. He was thinking about a woman. ‘He seems fine. He looked pretty grey to start with but then he seemed to pull himself together and he was fine during the delivery.’
‘Really?’
‘He’s fine,’ Ethan drawled, pulling up in a vacant parking space. ‘You girls worry too much.’
They arrived at the beach, parked in the car park and then made their way down the steps to the sand. A delicious smell of charcoal and cooking floated through the air and a group of teenagers were playing an extremely noisy game of volleyball on the sand.
Automatically, Evanna wandered over to help with the food.
‘We’re all under control,’ Meg said firmly, giving her a gentle push. ‘You go and have a swim, dear. It’s so hot, I’m sure you need it.’
‘I must admit, I do fancy a swim. Are you sure you can manage here?’
‘Absolutely. If I need help, I’ll yell. Kyla and Ethan are already in, look.’ She adjusted her sunglasses. ‘Go and join them.’
Deciding that it was too hot to argue, Evanna wriggled out of her dress, folded it neatly and placed it on top of her bag and then sprinted towards the water’s edge to join the others.
Kyla and Ethan were fooling around, splashing and ducking each other, and she waded cautiously into the water, shivering slightly as it surged above her knees. ‘I don’t know how you two can be so brave. It’s freezing.’
‘Fresh is the word you’re looking for,’ Kyla yelled, splashing Ethan and finding herself ducked as a result.
Smiling at the two of them, Evanna gingerly eased herself into the water.
She swam with them for about ten minutes and the cold water was deliciously refreshing against her hot skin. Despite the fact that it was late afternoon, the heat of the sun was relentless.
‘All right. That’s quite enough exercise. I’m starving.’ Kyla rubbed a hand over her face to clear her vision and squinted towards the shore. ‘Do you think the food is ready yet?’
‘I expect there will be sausages because they always feed the children first.’ Evanna dived under the water again, enjoying the cool rush of water through her hair. When she emerged, dripping, Logan was standing in front of her.
Instantly her legs weakened. ‘Logan!’ Her voice was a shocked squeak. She hadn’t expected to see him. Not yet.
More beach bum than doctor, she thought to herself, trying to catch her breath. He was wearing a pair of blue surf shorts and his shoulders were bare.
‘Hi, Evanna.’ His voice sounded unusually strained and she wiped the water from her eyes and studied him closely.
Something was wrong, she could sense it.
‘I—Is everything all right? Where’s Kirsty?’
‘One of the cousins offered to babysit. I decided to take your advice and have a night out.’
‘Oh. Great idea.’ He was staring at her. Why was he staring at her? Feeling self-conscious under his steady blue gaze, Evanna lifted a hand and squeezed the water out of her hair. It trailed over her shoulder in a thick, wet rope. ‘I tried to call you this morning.’
‘You did?’ His eyes were on her hair. ‘Why?’
She felt hideously flustered, not least because Kyla gave her a wink and started to swim towards shore, leaving her alone with Logan. ‘Why did I call you?’ She turned away from Kyla, found herself looking at his chest and backed away, flustered. ‘Because I wanted to ask about Helen Price. Do you know if she saw the cardiologist?’
‘Yes. He confirmed my suspicions. She has an atrial septal defect.’
‘Oh, poor thing.’ Evanna took another step backwards. ‘So what happens now? Open-heart surgery?’
He shook his head. ‘They’re going to have her in as a day case and operate using a catheter. It should be relatively straightforward.’
‘Well, that’s progress for you,’ Evanna croaked.
He watched her for a long moment and then his eyes slid to her mouth. ‘Evanna—’ He broke off and lifted his gaze to hers.
For a long moment they stared at each other and she felt her heart hammering rapidly against her chest. There was something in the atmosphere. Something—
No.
She was doing it again! She wasn’t going to start imagining something that wasn’t there! She wasn’t going to start dreaming again!
Anxious to get away from him, she turned towards the shore, her voice bright and breezy as she spoke. ‘Well, I’ve finished my swim so I think I’ll go and eat something.’
There was a long, aching silence and then he cleared his throat. ‘Go ahead. If you’re hungry.’
See? She spoke firmly to herself as she waded to shore. He hadn’t even tried to detain her. And what had they spoken about? Work. As usual. It didn’t matter whether they were in uniform or swimming gear, their relationship was the same as ever. Professional friendship.
Determined not to wallow, she pulled the blue sundress on top of her damp bikini and left her hair loose. And tonight she wasn’t going to spend her evening staring at Logan. She was going to socialise. Mingle. Allow him the space to find the woman he wanted to move on with.
Determined to enjoy herself, she talked to everyone she knew and at least a dozen people who she’d never met before. She spoke at length with Janet Price who was there with Helen, she helped Meg serve the food, she laughed with Kyla as they shared a delicious hamburger, trying not to drip ketchup on their clothes. Then the music started and she kicked off her flip-flops and danced barefoot in the sand with Ethan and then with Nick.
But no matter how much she talked, laughed or danced, she was always aware of Logan standing in the shadows. He danced with no one. Occasionally he exchanged a few words with someone but only when they’d made the effort to approach him. Other than that he stood alone. Apart.
And as midnight approached and lots of families started gathering their things together, Evanna couldn’t stand it any longer.
He’d said that he’d forgotten how to approach a woman but surely that couldn’t really be the case? Out of the corner of her eye she spotted Polly from the café, laughing at one of Nick’s terrible jokes.
Pretty Polly. Wasn’t that what all the boys had called her at school? Evanna knew that she’d be only too thrilled to be approached by Logan, so why was he hesitating?
Part of her wanted to leave for her own self-protection but a bigger part of her wanted to see Logan happy.
She walked over to him. ‘All you have to do is ask, you know.’
‘Ask?’
‘You say something like, “Do you fancy joining me for a walk on the beach?”’
‘Oh.’ He put his drink down on the upturned crate that had been placed on the sand. ‘In that case, do you fancy joining me for a walk on the beach?’
Evanna giggled. ‘Not me, you idiot. Polly. She’s standing there, looking hopeful. If you want to approach her, this is a really good time.’
‘But I’ve already asked you.’
‘W-we were j-just practising,’ Evanna stammered. ‘Role play.’
‘All right. In that case, I want you to walk along the beach with me. Call it role play, if you like. It’s been so long since I’ve walked along the beach with a woman, I’ve forgotten how to do it. I might put my feet in the wrong place.’
There was a dangerous glint in his blue eyes that made her feel strangely uncertain. She couldn’t read his thoughts. She really had absolutely no idea what he was thinking. ‘Logan, you should be asking Polly.’
‘I’m asking you.’
He was obviously still afraid to approach Polly. Deciding that he clearly had no idea just how attractive he was to women, Evanna smiled. ‘All right, then. Let’s walk. Towards the road or towards the cliffs?’
‘The cliffs.’ He’d pulled on a loose lin
en shirt over cut-off shorts but his feet were bare.
‘Is it so hard, Logan? Approaching another woman. Is it because you’re thinking of Catherine? Does it feel strange? Wrong?’ She wanted to understand. She wanted to help. Despite the late hour, there was still enough light for her to make out his features.
‘I’m not thinking of Catherine. Not at the moment. Should I be?’
‘No. I think it’s good. But I don’t understand why you were reluctant to approach Polly.’
They moved closer to the water’s edge and the sea rushed in, swirled around their ankles and then retreated with a gentle hiss.
She glanced back and suddenly realised how far they’d walked. ‘I can’t see the others.’
‘Does that matter?’
‘No. I just thought you might want to be getting back so that you can—’
‘Are you afraid of the dark?’ He gave her a lazy smile and took her hand in his. His fingers closed over hers, his grip strong and firm.
‘I’m not afraid of the dark.’
Without announcing his intention, he gave her a gentle pull and started walking away from the sea in the direction of the dunes.
What was he doing? ‘Logan—’
‘Don’t say anything.’ His voice sounded strained and suddenly her heart was beating so rapidly that she felt dizzy. This was ridiculous. She was walking hand in hand along a beach with a man she adored. And she didn’t have a clue what was going on. She just didn’t know what to say or do.
They crested the first dune and then slithered and slipped down into the dip. The sea breeze immediately faded away and they were enclosed, cocooned by the gentle swell of sand that created an intimate atmosphere.
‘Logan, I really think we should—’
His mouth came down on hers with a hunger that knocked the breath from her body. For a moment Evanna just stood still, so shocked that she couldn’t move. She felt the firm pressure of his hand behind her neck, felt his other arm slide round her waist, dragging her hard against him. And then she felt the tip of his tongue demanding an entry and excitement devoured her like a ravenous beast.
Her lips parted against his and she melted into the heat of his kiss, her senses stirred and tumbled as she closed her eyes and sank against him. Shock and surprise melted into frantic excitement. She tried to speak. Tried to reason with him. But his kiss was fierce and greedy and he clearly had no interest in conversation.