‘Mother, ’Cameron said, ignoring the question and leaning down to kiss her on the cheek. ‘How is Father?’ Dismounting he continued their conversation while squatting to greet his exuberant dog, the boxer’s docked tail wagging back and forth like an overwound metronome.
‘He’s going to be fine, dear. Your timing could not have been better. The fever has broken and he’s talking again. Meggie and Ellie are with him inside.’
‘Who else is here?’
‘Nobody.’
‘I thought Torben and Gerda might be.’
‘No. We haven’t seen them or Alice in ages.’
Cameron shrugged. ‘That must be a relief.’
Lorna ignored the comment. ‘Wait till you see little Frazer. Actually, he’s not little, he’s huge. Have you heard from Duncan?’ she babbled, walking beside Cameron as he led his horse towards a shy umfana who waited to take it from him.
‘Not recently. Fairfax could be anywhere.’
When Lorna looked up into her son’s face she was startled to see a coldness in his steely blue eyes that hadn’t been there before. It gave him a distant, haunted look.The war, she thought sadly, it has changed all of us. ‘I can’t wait to catch up on your news.’ Lorna was determined to remain positive but a mother’s intuition told her all was not well.
‘There’s not much to catch up on.’ Cameron shrugged, removing his saddlebags and sliding a military carbine from the leather bucket strapped to his saddle. ‘You can take my horse, ’he said to the young Zulu. ‘Make sure he is well rubbed down and fed.’
‘Yebo, nkosi.’ The boy led the tired animal towards the stables, leaving Lorna, Cameron and slobbering Saba standing in front of the house. Meggie and Ellie were waiting on the verandah. Before Cameron could say hello he was swamped with hugs and kisses.
Mister David hung back respectfully, a huge grin on his gleaming black face. ‘I see you, nkosi, ’ he said.
‘And I you, madala. Your son is well and sends greetings.’
Mister David nodded and nearly fell over Suza, who had actually moved to see what all the fuss was about.
‘Come and see Father, ’ Ellie said, taking one of her brother’s arms.
‘I’m sure he feels quite deserted, ’ Meggie added, seizing the other.
Later that evening, Lorna looked at her husband and burst into tears. It was going to be a good Christmas.
That night the rain came, falling in torrents on the tin roof. It was a sound Dallas had all but forgotten. One that said he was home.
Cameron had never replied to Ginnie’s letter. He carried it in the pocket of his tunic, next to the heart she had broken. Its contents he could repeat word for word but that did little more than bring back the memories. Today he would find out if the woman he loved could say the same things to his face.
She had always been there and when childhood friendship turned into something more, Ginnie gave him the time he needed to work some of the wildness out of his system. If anything, it made him love her all the more. They had never actually made love, though that was due more to him. Virginia Waring-Jones was the woman he would spend the rest of his life with and respect for her virginity was his way of telling her so.
Ginnie understood him better even than his parents. Cameron remembered how the two of them would talk for hours of a family, the farm and plans for their future together. How God must have laughed at that, he thought to himself. Then the war came. It shouldn’t have changed anything but when Kevin was wounded it changed everything. Cameron sometimes wished he were the one who would never walk again.
Apparently, Ginnie hadn’t called at Morningside since before Duncan and Tanith’s wedding in August. That had been four months ago. Her letter reached him in October. Had he left it too long?
It was Ginnie’s father who answered the door and invited Cameron into the living room. He was surprised at how much the man had aged. Of Kevin or any of the women there was no sign.
‘I’ll call Virginia, ’he said, obviously embarrassed by Cameron’s unexpected arrival.
When she appeared a few minutes later Cam froze. He had intended sweeping her up in his arms, smothering the woman he loved with kisses and making everything good again, but her reserved demeanour instantly dispelled any thoughts of doing that. Instead, he stood awkwardly– hat in hands – while she took a seat and carefully gathered in the long dark dress she was wearing.
‘Please, Cameron, won’t you sit down?’ she invited, almost formally. ‘You are looking well. Are you home for Christmas? How is the family?’ The words came tumbling out, as if from someone he barely knew.
‘My darling, these past weeks have been the worst hell I have ever known. How could you suddenly say that you no longer love me? It isn’t possible.’
Ginnie’s hands were clasped in her lap, knuckles white with strain as she unconsciously wrung her hands together. There was a ring on her engagement finger which she kept turning. Not his.
‘It was not a good idea to come here, ’ she replied softly. ‘My intention was never to hurt you. I had no choice.’
‘Choice? Ginnie, you love me. How in God’s name can you use a word like “choice”?’
‘You’ve seen Father. Kevin is, let us say, having a little sleep. I cannot desert my family. Somebody has to run this place. They need me more than you do.’
‘We can work something out, ’Cameron replied, pacing the room. ‘Your family is important but I do not believe your feelings for me have changed. Our love is built on a lifetime of knowing each other. Something like that doesn’t just stop.’
‘Cameron, I really would prefer it if you sat down, ’Virginia said gently. ‘You are working yourself into a temper.’
‘A temper?’ Cameron repeated the word in exasperation. ‘I’ve been stuck out in the bloody veld fighting to give this country a future and all you can say is that I’m working myself into a temper? Well, so what!’
‘Sit down, ’ Ginnie said again, more forcefully this time. ‘There is something you have to hear which will hurt you even further. I must tell you all the same.’
‘What could hurt more than refusing to admit that you still love me?’ Cameron fell into a chair opposite Ginnie. ‘There can be nothing in this world worse than that.’
‘I do not think that you should come here again, ’ Ginnie said, her head bowed. ‘I am to be wed in three months.’
The statement hit Cameron harder than a Boer dumdum bullet. For a moment he was unable to comprehend what Ginnie had just told him. ‘Who?’ he finally asked, his voice little more than a whisper.
‘Paul Norman, ’she replied, still unable to look him in the eye.
‘Norman!’ Cameron exploded, leaping to his feet. ‘You can’t mean it. That little weasel from next door?’
‘I knew you would not understand. Paul has asked me for my hand in marriage and I have accepted. That’s all there is to it.’
‘When did all this take place?’ Cameron asked, standing over Ginnie.
She didn’t answer. ‘Paul has been very kind to us. We might even join the two farms.’
‘Look me in the eye and say that you love him, ’ Cameron demanded. ‘Or is this no more than a marriage of convenience?’
‘I do love Paul, ’ Ginnie said, although her voice was not as convincing as she had intended. ‘I am sorry, Cameron, ’she went on. ‘The wedding date has been set so I would rather you say no more and leave this house.’
‘The only thing that kept me going out there was the knowledge of our love.’ Cameron nearly choked on the words, forcing himself not to burst into tears. ‘Every night I told myself we were one day closer to being together. Then your letter arrived. I wanted to desert my men and be back here with you. You were all I could think about. Ginnie, I will not – no, cannot – accept that there is another you love more than me.’
‘What’s done is done, ’ Ginnie said, holding out the ring he had given her. ‘Take this and know that there was no other way.’
&n
bsp; Cameron stepped back, his face contorted with anguish and anger. ‘Keep it. Call the bloody thing a wedding present. I hope you find happiness.’ With that, he stormed out of the house.
Outside he seized the reins of his horse and swung into the saddle. Turning its head Cameron kicked it into a canter and rode away without once looking back. Tears flowed and he ignored them. It was over.
Ginnie hadn’t moved. She sat in the chair crying uncontrollably, her mind in turmoil. How could her life have become so complicated? How was it that she had found solace in another man’s arms and yet her heart could not let go of Cameron? She had thought she was over him until he appeared and stood in front of her. ‘Oh, Cam, ’ she sobbed, knowing full well that if it were not for the war their future could have been all they had planned. Life was so unfair.
When Cameron returned to Morningside the fury on his face made it plain no questions would be tolerated. All knew where he had been. Even Saba, sensing something was seriously wrong, decided that it might be best to give her master a wide berth.
Sitting in his favourite chair on the verandah and looking down towards the lush green of cane plantings along the Mhlathuze River, Dallas reflected on how close he had come to dying. There had been many times in his life he had stood toe to toe with death but more often than not the instinctive decision which kept him alive was his own. Pneumonia had been a different matter altogether. The insidious disease was something over which he had had no control. All he had to fight with was his will to survive and the knowledge that his family needed him, Lorna in particular.
No, he would not be returning to active service. The medical report submitted by Doctor Parry and Ellie would see to that. In many ways Dallas was glad. He had done his bit for Queen and country and now it was time to think of the future– even admit a few mistakes.
This was not cattle country. Dallas accepted that, though he had persevered and been more successful than most. Sugar was, without doubt, the way things were moving and Zululand yields were far better than anything in the rest of Natal. It was only a matter of time, two or three years at most, before the rail line from Durban reached Empangeni. Another mill would be needed by then. What if it were on his doorstep? The thought called for a family discussion. But with Christmas just a week away, it would have to wait. Anyway, Ellie had already gone and Cameron had other matters on his mind.
There was nothing anybody could do about his break-up with Ginnie. Even the news that Caroline Hammond was giving him her farm, Wakefield, met with a snapped response:‘ And what am I supposed to do with the place – become a bloody hermit?’ Nobody could talk to him. Tanith had tried – introducing Frazer – but that only added to his depression. Mister David tried, seeking news of Henry. Cameron did at least take the time to tell him of his son’s bravery, swelling the Zulu’s heart with pride.
Saba had shadowed her master’s every move. Cam would take a rifle and they would be gone for hours, disappearing into the swampy reed beds round the Mhlathuze Lagoon. Dallas suspected that an old croc who lived there was the challenge but the wily old fellow was well protected by an early warning system provided by the plovers he allowed to feed in and around his giant jaws. Dallas remembered when his friend and mentor, John Dunn, had shot a twenty-two footer on the lagoon. Man-eater it might have been but monsters like that are a thing of the past, he thought, before his mind snapped back to the present.
At least some of the family would be home for Christmas. Cameron, Meggie, of course, Tanith and Frazer – the grandson he had only just met. Torben and Gerda were expected, though they hadn’t bothered to confirm they were coming. Dallas looked forward to seeing the changes in Alice, though he realised that their visit would also mean having to put up with Gerda’s perceptions of the important things in life. From what he had seen for himself, Torben’s growing wealth was no figment of his imagination. His son’s business was doing well and he had done it on his own with no calls for help.
‘Penny for your thoughts?’ Lorna said, joining her husband and laying an affectionate hand on his shoulder.
‘I was just thinking about this place and our rather special family, ’he replied, reaching up to touch her. ‘They may cause us concern from time to time but when all is said and done we are so very fortunate.’
Lorna sank into a chair beside him. ‘Even with the tragedies that have befallen us?’ she asked, though it was not really meant as a question.
‘God has plans that we are not privy to, ’ Dallas responded, bringing a faint smile of surprise to her face.
‘That is not in doubt, my darling, but I have never heard you admit it. Don’t tell me age and maturity have brought on a bout of religious fervour in my normally pagan husband?’
Dallas looked uncomfortable. ‘I don’t think so, ’ he replied seriously, ‘though somehow it makes it easier to accept what we have lost in our lives.’
Lorna nodded and fell silent.
Dallas had come to know every nuance of her manner and felt she had more to say. ‘You seem a bit distant. Is something wrong?’
Lorna looked up at the sky before replying. ‘There is something I think you should know, ’ she said. ‘But first you must promise not to overreact and get angry.’
‘How can you expect me to do that when I have no idea what I should not get angry about?’ Dallas had a pained expression on his face. ‘Give me a hint. That’s only fair.’
‘It concerns Meggie, ’Lorna said. ‘And I still need your word.’
Dallas felt immediate alarm at the mention of his youngest daughter, the person who had a place in his heart second only to Lorna. He always tried not to differentiate between any of his children but Meggie had always been special. Lorna knew that and accepted their closeness, so whatever was on her mind had to be bad news. She left him no choice. ‘You have my word that I will not display anger at anything you have to tell me.’
‘Meggie is seeing Stanley King.’
‘She’s what?!’
‘Remember your promise, dear, ’Lorna hurried to remind him.
‘Stan King, ’Dallas roared. ‘He’s an old man. He’s my age!’
‘No he isn’t, ’ Lorna said, placing a restraining hand on her husband’s arm to prevent him leaping to his feet and striding up and down the verandah as he was prone to do when he needed to think. ‘Keeping it from you is breaking Meggie’s heart. She can’t bear the thought of hurting you.’
Lorna’s well-chosen words eased Dallas’s anger. ‘Who else knows?’ he asked.
‘Only Ellie. She tried to talk Meggie into telling you but couldn’t convince her.’
‘At least that explains why she seems to have been avoiding me.’ Dallas was calming down, though he couldn’t accept the thought of his little girl in the arms of a man twice her age. Perhaps when his strength returned, he would ride out to Kingsway with a sjambok and teach the old lecher a lesson or two ... ‘I think I should have a chat with our Meggie, ’was what he said. ‘Explain to her that it cannot work.’
‘Why?’ Lorna asked, taking him completely by surprise.
Dallas looked at her in disbelief. ‘Why? I would have thought that was obvious.’
‘This may come as a bit of a shock to you, my husband, but your little girl – the one you used to carry around on your shoulders and tuck into bed with a story– has grown up. She is a young woman ready to leave our house in search of her own life. Don’t look so surprised. I have been thinking that Stan King is a man very much like yourself in more ways than you would dare admit. Meggie might not realise it but to some extent she’s paying you an enormous compliment.’
Lorna’s outburst stunned Dallas. ‘I don’t care, ’ he said. ‘All I know is that she is far too young to be running around with any man – young or old. Meggie’s still a child.’
‘In your eyes she will always be the baby girl who played rough and tumble games with her brothers and sisters one minute and dolls’ houses the next. Those days are gone, Dallas. Our family has grown u
p. Letting our little girl lead her own life is just as painful for me as it is for you, but I have realised this – even greater sadness will follow if you confront our daughter and attempt to stop her seeing the man she loves. She will dig in her heels and the character you so admire will do the rest.’
‘She will listen to me, ’Dallas growled. ‘I am her father.’
‘Think about it.’ Lorna laughed bitterly. ‘I did the same thing for the man I love. Our daughter sees in Stan King the same strengths she sees in you.’
Lorna could sense Dallas’s reaction and recognised his shock. ‘It is perfectly normal, ’ she soothed. ‘We women often look at the first real love in our lives and find our fathers. It’s from them we learned what it is like to be sheltered from harm, to find comfort in their strength and protection in their arms. Is it so surprising, then, to unconsciously seek another who will provide us with the same sense of well-being and love? I think Meggie has found that and more in Stan King.’
Dallas listened to Lorna’s logical explanation but still could not accept that his little girl had turned to another. No-one was good enough to take Meggie from him, though he grudgingly had to admit– to himself if nobody else – that no matter what man had appeared in his daughter’s life he would have found some fault with him. In the case of Stan King, age was the only shortcoming he could think of. Damn it, he had always liked and respected the man – until now.
‘Dallas?’
‘What?’
‘Go to your daughter and let her know you are still the loving father she has always known.’
‘How can you expect me to condone what she is doing?’ he asked quietly.
‘I don’t. But you have to recognise that Meggie is no longer a little girl and one day soon she will start a family of her own. Dallas, love is not about possession, it’s about giving. Perhaps that is what makes it so difficult.’
Dallas turned to Lorna, hearing the wisdom in her words. His undying love for this woman who herself had given up so much to be by his side in a strange and often dangerous land had never been stronger. ‘I will still have to sit the bounder down and have a fatherly chat with him.’ He smiled weakly. ‘Won’t that be fun!’
Footprints of Lion Page 35