by Sky Corgan
I stormed into the bar, forcing back the tears of shame. I knew we weren’t dating, but I didn’t realize I was some dirty little secret Gabriel had to sweep under the rug for his reputation. I took a deep breath then blew it out, trying to calm myself. Why did I care? Just because we had exchanged fun messages? Talked all day for weeks? I waved down the bartender, ordering a vodka and tonic, heavy on the vodka.
“Fuck him,” I said to the drink.
“I’d rather you fuck me.” A man slid up onto the bar stool next to me, and I leveled him with a scary enough glare that he turned right around and scrambled away.
Tugging out my phone, I scrolled down my list of contacts before tapping to call my best friend. “Tasha? I’m sorry to call so late…” My voice cracked.
“Abigail! Where are you? What's up? Didn’t you say you’d be meeting with that hunk of a rock star?!”
“About that…” I bit back the tears of anger. “Could you…come meet me?”
“Of course! Give me the address. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
***
I was three vodka and tonics in before Tasha finally arrived with an extra jacket, per my request. I think I looked as miserable as I felt. Rejection stings. Who knew I cared so much?
She sat next to me, draping the jacket over my shoulders. I ordered her a drink and told her what happened.
“What an ass. Embarrassed to date you?” she blistered on my behalf.
I smiled faintly. “We weren’t even dating. We’ve gone on maybe two legit dates. We just had sex. Which is fine. I mean, rock stars have sex with tons of people. No big deal.” I snorted, downing my drink.
“Screw him.”
“That’s right. Screw him and his stupid grin and that stupid twinkle in his eyes.” I pulled myself to my feet. “I could sleep with whoever I wanted.”
“I would sleep with you!” A guy nearby called.
“Yeah, not tonight.” Tasha snapped at him.
“See? I could. I could do casual hookups… But Tasha, we texted. We had fun. I didn’t realize I was just a…piece of entertainment. Something to be tossed aside when inconvenient.”
“Honey…” She tugged me into a hug.
I rested my head on her shoulder, frowning. “I hate that someone I barely know can affect me like this.”
“You liked him. You clicked. That doesn’t happen often for you. It's okay. Let’s get you home. We can make it a sleepover, watch some crappy movies and have a blast!”
Tears fell for the first time from my eyes. I had the most amazing best friend. She would drop anything for me. “Okay, sounds like a plan.”
Tasha held my arm, helping me walk to her car. Once home, we changed into night clothes and put on a ridiculous movie, pulling out the ice cream and popcorn. I pushed all thoughts of Gabriel to the back of my mind and enjoyed the evening with my best friend and several glasses of wine.
CHAPTER NINE
Gabriel texted me a couple of times over the next few weeks, but I ignored all of the casual ones and only responded to things related to business. I couldn't ignore him completely, but I also didn't want to pretend like we were anything more than client and contractor. Every time he'd send me a meme, I countered with requests for videos for the band's website.
Kia kept me updated on the dating rumor. They discredited it with Gabriel's television interview, and the gossip surrounding the rumor died down pretty easily. Watching his interview made me even more upset—was a painful reminder of the delusion I'd allowed myself to fall into.
It took a little while, but Gabriel finally gave up on messaging me for anything other than business. Things were better that way. I relaxed back into my routine—my life without him.
I began playing a new competitive game, devoting my after work hours to destroying the opposition and rising in the ranks. There was a tournament in coming up, and I intended to win. My fans were going to be there. I may not be a rock star, but I had my own following.
“Good night, guys,” I said as my team finished up a match, receiving a chorus of responses from my guild members.
After closing out of the game, I stretched, popping my shoulders with a wince. Yeah, perhaps I stayed up a bit too late. I glanced at the time and laughed. Two in the morning on a work night. Oh well.
The tournament was in just a few days. I had already let Kia know I wouldn't be unavailable while I was traveling to participate. I would have to make sure all of my updates to my client websites were done before I left. It was a lot of work, but I was confident I could complete it in time.
***
I arrived at the hotel early, checking in to my room and organizing my stuff. Tasha had crafted my costume herself. She and had I met at one of these cons almost a decade ago. Now she was a fashion designer, one of the rising stars, but she was never too busy to make something for me.
After slipping into my costume, I slid on my wig and put on my makeup. It took over an hour to get ready, but that was fine. I still had plenty of time. I clipped my badge onto my flowing coat and tapped my spiked blue wig, ensuring it was securely in place before leaving my room and moving toward the elevator.
I had four hours until the first round of the tournament. That meant I could explore the booths, game rooms, and meet some friends for an early dinner.
Tasha’s work garnered tons of attention. Many con-goers asked me to stop for pictures.
I purchased some game art at the artist's alley and explored the various vendors. Then I met up with my friends at one of the panels.
“Alex! Kendra!” I tapped their shoulders, and they turned. They were dressed as a night elf from World of Warcraft and a blood elf. It was cute.
They both burst into laughter. “Abigail! Damn girl, you went all out this year. Did you have Tasha do that again?!”
I nodded, and they inspected the outfit.
“Her attention to detail is amazing. Look, there's even a chink in the armor where your character has one.” Alex shook his head. “Remind me to get with her on my next cosplay.”
“I’ll check to see if she's free,” I teased. It was a running joke. Tasha only ever made costumes for me.
“We're excited to see your first round. New game, new team. Is this their first tournament?”
I nodded.
“Think they're ready?”
“Hell yeah. I wouldn’t have brought them if they weren’t,” I said confidently.
We left the con to go to a restaurant for dinner. The strange looks didn't bother us as we ate and laughed, catching up on a year’s worth of news. But all too soon, it was time for the tournament.
I excused myself to go meet up with my teammates. All the players logged in, and the tournament began. My team was nervous but ready. I took charge, and we dominated the first bracket, easily moving up. The next bracket didn’t start until after noon the next day, so we all logged off for rest.
***
Very few spectators attend the first bracket. There are so many rounds that most people don't start paying attention until later in the competition when most of the teams have been vetted out. Saturday was when all the fans came to watch on the big screens. Five matches going at once, five different screens, tons of screaming fans. I came in, shirt stating my name, hair in a bun, and black jeans. I greeted familiar faces and new fans. Some had brought banners to show their support. I chatted with them before turning my focus to the competition.
There were two close matches, but we squeaked by, making it into the finals.
It was us versus a group based in Germany. We went in, fingers tense from endless clicking. My wrist hurt and my vision was starting to blur, but I kept at it, talking swiftly to my team through the mic. “Alpha, circle around. Cut them off before they reach it. Fucking do it now!” I growled.
We were ahead, barely, but the other team swooped in and claimed the victory in the last minute. I groaned as the announcer said that we'd been eliminated. Hearing the cheers of the other team was like rubbing
salt in a wound. Grudgingly, I sent a congratulations message to them before logging off.
After packing up, I walked away, looking down at my system like it had failed me. Not paying attention to where I was going, I crashed into someone and stumbled back. “I’m so sorry!”
I gasped when I looked up, staring dumbfound at Gabriel. Had I passed out at my screen?
“Not a problem. I was just coming to congratulate you.” He had that goofy grin that tugged at my heart. That betrayer.
“Sorry. I’ve got fans to talk to,” I muttered, turning around and backtracking.
“Can’t escape me that fast.” Gabriel laughed, easily navigating the crowd that I was struggling through.
He grabbed my arm, and I glared at him. “I would hate to embarrass you. What if you have a fan in this crowd?” I snapped, pulling away.
“Looks like you have your own fans.” He gestured at the people waving to get my attention.
I waved back, smiling before turning to him. “What do you want?”
“I wanted to talk. Since you ignore my texts.”
“Aren’t you supposed to be touring?”
“Yes. Kia was quite mad when I said I needed a few days off.”
“It's your first big tour. You can’t just take a few days off!” I folded my arms over my chest.
“I'm the lead singer. I can do what I want,” he mimicked Eric Cartman before tugging me outside. “I was curious what could cause our ever dedicated web designer, who even updates on the weekends, to take a few days off, so I Googled your name and saw you entered this tournament.”
“I told you, I'm a serious gamer,” I mumbled.
“Yes, you did. I honestly didn’t understand what that meant,” Gabriel said. “Will you please just talk with me?” He motioned to a bench.
I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. Fine. I could talk to him. That wasn’t a problem. I was a professional. I had gotten over my hurt feelings. He could do whatever he wanted.
“Fine. What is it?” I sat down, arms crossed, laptop case secured on my lap.
“I watched some of your YouTube videos when I Googled you. I didn’t realize you had a following as big as mine.”
“Yeah. I’m no PewDiePie, but I have a following,” I muttered, not sure where he was going with that.
“I read several interviews you've given gamer blogs,” he continued.
“Were you stalking me online?” I hissed, embarrassed. I was a totally different person online. Not someone I wanted him to see.
“Yes. You weren’t talking to me, remember? Abby, I thought we had something. I mean, we traded memes. I felt like you really got me. I'm not ready to just let that disappear because I sounded like a condescending dick last time.”
“You made it sound like I was an embarrassment ruining your image.”
“That wasn’t what I meant. I just didn’t want you caught up in...insanity. I mean, look at some of the people rock stars date. Their lives get ruined.”
“I wasn’t worried about that.” It had never even crossed my mind, honestly. "Besides, it's not like we were really dating. We just went out a few times."
“You're right. But I want them to be real dates from now on." He cleared his throat, turning up the dramatics. "Abby, will you agree to date me? Rock star warts and all?”
“What?” I laughed.
“Formally, I won’t hide that I'm dating you. I'll even post it in the backstage interview things, if you want. I felt like we clicked. Didn’t you?”
I did, but I didn’t want to admit it.
Gabriel cupped my face, and before I could pull back, he engaged me in a kiss. I gasped, realizing that I had missed the warmth of his lips. His tongue darted into my mouth, and I couldn’t help but respond, my hands grabbing his arm.
He was smiling when he pulled away. “We have an ember that could become something more. Please, Abby. Let me start it out right this time.”
I sighed, closing my eyes. This was going to be a big mistake. “Fine.”
Gabriel cheered. “Great! Let me take you out to dinner to celebrate your accomplishment here.”
“I didn’t win,” I reminded him.
He barely gave me time to drop my stuff off before we were heading to some amazing restaurant near the convention that I didn’t even know existed. I didn’t have time to change, so I felt entirely out of sorts as we walked in. All of the other people were dressed beautifully, and I was dressed like, well, a cosplayer. Not that Gabriel didn’t stand out as much as, if not more than me.
“Why didn’t we just go to Noodles and Company or something simple?” I asked as we were seated.
“I’m proving a point to you that I’m not worried that people will see us together.”
I rolled my eyes. “You could do that anywhere.”
He picked up his menu, ordering us some wine.
We sat in awkward silence for a solid ten minutes before I finally asked, “How goes the tour? A good showing?”
“It was amazing. We’ve never sold so many tickets. There were tons of fans, and we gave away a lot of backstage passes. It was exciting to see how our music has impacted all of these people. It actually inspired a few new songs! We'll be introducing those on the next tour. Kia is trying to get us into other states. There's another music festival next month; she's trying to get us set up as a headliner. It's tough since we don’t have nearly the fan base some of these other bands have.”
“Have you tried posting some YouTube videos?”
“Like the vlog stuff?”
“No. Like formal music videos for your songs. You'll get more shares than your live videos.”
He frowned. “I don’t think Kia has a connect with someone who does music videos, but we can find—”
I cut him off, smiling. “I have someone. He does videos for a living, he’s an indie filmmaker and videographer.”
“Are you serious?” Gabriel blinked. Then his eyes narrowed in suspicion. “Is he an ex?”
I burst into laughter. “He's gay. Very much so. We’ve been friends since high school. He would probably hurl if you even suggested we dated. His standards,” I paused, holding my hand really high, “are way up here. Guys in suits, well paid, very sophisticated.” I shook my head. “No, there's no worries that he's an ex.”
“Great.” He sighed in relief.
That set the relaxed tone for the rest of the dinner. I told him about all of my battles at the con and how exciting it had been up until we lost. He didn’t understand, but he listened with enthusiasm. That meant a lot to me.
By dessert, we were flirting again. Little comments in our conversation, an accidental hand touch. I was grinning like a loon, but he was too, so it was okay.
We split a piece of cake. Gabriel fed me, and I returned the favor. He took his time on each bite, licking the fork. I couldn’t ignore the zing it sent through me. I could easily picture that tongue on me, eating me out.
By the time he was walking me back to my hotel room, we were both wound a little too tightly. Outside my door, I turned to him. “That was…a lot of fun, Gabriel.”
“It was, wasn’t it?” He leaned against the door frame, smiling down at me.
I stood on my tiptoes to give him a peck, and he wrapped his arms around me, pulling me in for a deep kiss. I melted in his embrace, our tongues dancing. He still tasted like the cake, with a hint of Gabriel. I moaned as his hands roamed. When he broke free from the kiss, there was no hiding the desire in my eyes.
“Are you sure you don’t want me to come in?” he asked teasingly.
I took a deep breath, already regretting my decision. I could climb him right now, and it would be worth it. But I shook my head. I needed to know that this was real. That he wasn't just going to fuck and run.
“Goodnight, Gabriel,” I told him, waiting until he had stepped towards the elevator before I let myself in.
I silently cursed for being such a prude. I could have let him rock my world. Did I really trust him so l
ittle with my heart since he'd already hurt me once?
Shaking my head, I took a cold shower until my body stopped trembling with desire. Then I settled in for bed.
CHAPTER TEN
I didn’t get to see Gabriel for a week after the tournament, and when we did meet, it was purely professional. I scheduled a meeting with Luke, my videographer friend. Kia looked amused, as did the rest of the band, when Luke started flirting with the bass player. Totally unexpected. Not the type of guy I thought he'd go for at all.
Naturally, Luke's talent landed him the job, and he and Kia began working on which direction they wanted the band's music videos to go in. Once the videos were ready, I placed snippets on The Flaming Arrow's website, and fans went wild. CD sales spiked, and a new line of merchandise was born.
After two weeks of seemingly nonstop work, I finally reached out to Gabriel via text. “Hey. I know you're busy, but I was wondering if you wanted to meet up?”
He responded with a thumbs up emoji, and I smiled.
“Can you meet me at the park near where you live?”
Another thumbs up.
Rolling my eyes, I fixed my makeup and hair, By the time I walked out, my Uber was already waiting.
The Uber driver was especially friendly. We chatted until she dropped me off. I waved and walked to the park entrance near Gabriel’s apartment, settling on a bench.
“I’m at the entrance near you,” I messaged, surprised to hear a phone beep near me. I looked around in confusion, and he popped out of the bushes, a grin on his face. He held a few hand-picked flowers.
Gabriel scooped me up into his arms and twirled me around before setting me back down and handing me the flowers. I laughed, giving them a sniff. They didn't smell like anything in particular.
“I missed you," he told me. "Why'd you want to meet here?”
“I figured you might enjoy a walk in the park.”