* * *
Serg ended up dropping me off at home before going to handle some business.
“I’ll be back in a few hours baby,” he told me before I got out of the car.
“Okay.” I planted a soft kiss on his lips and opened the car door.
I knew that he didn’t really want me to deal with Caramel. Although he was a street nigga who was down for whatever, he didn’t want shit to be dangerous for me. He’d said that the type of business I was involved in was dangerous enough without me making enemies. I told him that when you make money you make enemies. That was just how it was.
Once I was inside of my quiet, spacious domain, reality set in once again. My best friend in the whole wide world was not talking to me. I’d tried to call, but she’d obviously blocked my number. I couldn’t believe that she was acting like that. I really missed her, but I decided to call Bells.
“Sasha, heyyyy boo!” She squealed excitedly when she answered the phone.
“What’s up Bells. I miss you girl.”
“Aww, I miss you too.”
We talked for a while and I filled her in on what was going on with Cherie and Serg.
“Cherie was reachin’ girl. I ain’t never tell her I had a crush on Serg. I mean, yeah, he’s sexy and I’m happy as hell for you, but I ain’t say that shit. She must’ve felt that it was something between you two. Maybe that was her way of tryin’ to get you to confess.”
“Maybe so.” I sighed.
Right when I was about to say something else, my phone beeped with another call.
“Hold on boo. Let me see who’s callin’ me.”
I glanced down at the screen and it was a Texas number. It was funny that I’d seen that number a few times before, but I never answered it. That time out of curiosity, I decided to.
“Let me call you back Bells.”
“A’ight girl.”
“Love you.”
“Love you too.”
I answered the call. “Hello.”
“It’s so good to hear your voice Sasha.”
My blood started to boil at the sound of his.
“Kamal. It’s been years. Let’s get to the damn point? Where the fuck are my divorce papers?”
As angry as I was, I couldn’t give him a hint that I really wanted to end his life.
He cleared his throat. “I don’t want to divorce you.”
I was taken aback. “What the fuck do you mean? Do you think you can just leave me for my best friend, disappear for two years and I’ll just take you back?”
“We need to talk. Face to face.” He sighed.
“You have nothing to say to me…!”
“Please Sasha, I’ll be in Atlanta next week. I need to see you.”
“Why? Why do you need to see me after all this time?”
He sighed and then cleared his throat. “I never stopped lovin’ you and I never loved Jordan. I need you to promise me that you’ll see me.”
That nigga just didn’t know that I was going to tell Serg everything. Being that Kamal didn’t know about us and the fact that I knew his little secret, that made it easy for him to trust me. I decided to play along, since that may be the only way we could get to him.
“So, you’re in Texas now? Not California?” I quizzed.
“Yeah.”
“You still with Jordan?”
“I guess you can say that.”
“Hmm, I guess the grass wasn’t so green on the other side.”
“You don’t know the half. If only things turned out different, but I’ll explain all of that to you later. I’ll be in touch. Okay?”
“Yeah, okay,” I agreed.
Right after we ended the call, I called Serg.
“Hey babe,” he said with the sound of loud music playing in the background.
“Can you turn that down please?” I stuck my finger in my ear, but he turned it down.
“Sorry babe. What’s up?”
“You’ll never guess who just called me.”
He didn’t bother guessing. I guess he wanted me to get to the damn point. “Who?”
“Kamal.”
“What? What did he say?”
I filled him in.
“And you did agree to meet him right? You know this may be our only chance to get that nigga.”
“At first I forgot about the agenda and I wasn’t too cooperative. Then it did occur to me that it may be our only chance.”
“K ma. I’ll be there soon. I’m handlin’ somethin’ right now.”
Something didn’t feel right to me, but I didn’t want to read too much into it. It wasn’t like I expected him to be with me twenty-four seven, and I knew what came with his lifestyle. However, I wanted him to drop everything for me. When he didn’t, I wondered if he was spending his time with another woman.
“Ok babe, I’ll see you soon then.”
I hoped he didn’t sense my insecurity. That must’ve stemmed from what Kamal did to me, because Serg had never cheated that I knew of. Not putting anything past a man, but if he was cheating on me, he was damn good at it. Then I wasn’t the type to look for anything. I didn’t check his phone, or his social network pages. There was no need to do all that. If he had some bitch out there he was fucking, at least she stayed in her lane.
* * *
A couple days later I got another unexpected call from Kamal.
“So you with Serg now?” He asked as if he was mad or something. As if he had the right to be.
“Why would you give a fuck!” I snapped.
Would him knowing affect the plan? I was certain that he wouldn’t come to Atlanta now.
Damn!
“Do you know how dangerous he is?”
“Uh, duh. He’s my best friend’s brother. I’m very aware of his lifestyle, thank you. Unlike you, he doesn’t keep secrets from me. Yeah, I know everything.” I filled him in on what Serg had told me.
“He didn’t tell you everything Sasha. I can guarantee you that. I owed him a little money back in the day. When we were at the graduation party I didn’t offer you to him. He wanted you. He told me that if I let him fuck you, he’ll erase my debt. I told him hell nah. There was no way. You really think I’d offer you to another man as jealous as I was? No amount of money would’ve made me do that.”
My heart fell, because I didn’t know who or what to believe. Why would Serg lie to me? Kamal had every reason to, but still, who could I trust?
Kamal kept talking. “He’s the reason I left baby. He threatened to kill me if I didn’t leave you. That nigga had been wanting you. It was his suggestion that I get with Jordan, since she confided in Cherie about being in love with me. Well, he claimed Cherie told him that. I felt that if I was with her, that would be the next best thing to being with you. She hates me because I talk about you all the time. She doesn’t know about Serg’s threat. She really thinks I chose her over you. The bitch gets on my nerves. She nags more than you…”
“I don’t believe you Kamal!” I snapped, cutting his lies off. Did Jordan really tell Cherie that? How could she keep that away from me? There was no way. “You’re full of shit! Serg loves me and he would never do any of what you’re sayin’. He kept your ass alive because of me. Don’t make him look like the bad guy. You shouldn’t have ever got caught up in that lifestyle. You lied to me for years! At least Serg doesn’t lie to me. That’s why I trust him more than you. So, is this what you wanted to talk about? Huh? Are you afraid to come here now since you know about us? You’re such a fuckin’ coward. If you had loved me so much, why didn’t you stand up for me? Huh? Instead you did exactly what you claim Serg told your pussy ass to do. Fuck you! I don’t want a man who can’t protect me anyways. Good thing you left.”
His ego was crushed and I could tell. I’d said all that, but I honestly didn’t know what to believe. I had to talk to Serg.
“You don’t mean that ma. You don’t. I know you still love me.”
I ignored that bullshit he was talking. “Who to
ld you about Serg?”
“You know I’m still in touch with a few of my niggas there. Word gets around. Somebody saw ya’ll together. I don’t think it’ll be a good idea for me to come there now. Although I miss you and I want you back so bad.” He cleared his throat. “You’re with him now though and I don’t need no more trouble. Guess he got what he wanted huh?” His voice broke.
“Whether you’re telling the truth about Serg or not, do you really think I’d take you back? Do you think I’m that damn stupid? I’ll wait.”
“Nah, but I thought I’d have that change eventually. I’ll send you the divorce papers. Just don’t marry that nigga. I ain’t lying on him. He ain’t shit. I didn’t leave ‘cause I owe him a hundred stacks. That would’ve been easy to give him back. You know that shit don’t make sense to you. Serg sent me away to have you. He knew that I’d never go against him and his goons.”
A sigh escaped my lips as I listened to what Kamal was accusing Serg of. Damn, I was so confused. Who the hell were the men I’d fallen in love with? At that point I felt like I didn’t know either of them. My head was spinning and all I wanted to do was confront Serg about Kamal’s allegations. Suddenly killing Kamal and Jordan didn’t seem so important anymore. What if he was telling the truth and I didn’t even have a reason to. What if Serg was so adamant about killing Kamal so that I wouldn’t find out the truth. Kamal was right about one thing. One hundred thousand dollars was not enough to throw his life away for. I was sure that he could’ve paid that back. We had more than that in our bank accounts.
“So, I guess that’s it then. There’s nothing else for us to talk about. Just send me the papers and we have no reason to talk again. Bye Kamal.” I hung up on him and called Serg.
“Come over here…now…” I simply stated and pressed the END button before he could even respond.
Chapter 14
“And you gon’ believe the nigga who left you for your best friend over the nigga who’s been here for you?” Serg’s forehead wrinkled as he scowled at me.
“I don’t know what to believe. Why would he run for two hundred stacks? He had way more money than that. I don’t get it.”
Serg stared at me. “Greed ma. That nigga was money hungry as fuck. Worse than me. That was just part of his debt. When you put it all together, he owed me way more. He took advantage of the fact that you’re my sister’s friend. I’d always spare him because of you, because Cherie would beg me to. She knew about what was goin’ on, but we both wanted to protect your feelings.”
“More secrets. I don’t know what the fuck to think anymore!” I balled my fists up at my sides in frustration. “This is all just too much for me Serg.”
He searched my face as he shook his head. “What are you sayin’?”
“I’m sayin’ that I need to be alone for now. Maybe…maybe I was just lonely and you happened to be there. I mean, can I really trust you? Why would Kamal lie? Why would you lie? Which one of you is tellin’ me the truth? Is either of you tellin’ the truth? I’m just so confused right now.”
Serg walked over to me and I backed away.
“Just leave,” I put my hand out to show him that I wanted him to keep his distance.
“You really want me to leave? How can you say that you were just lonely? I know it’s more than that between us.”
“Uh, yeah. I do want you to leave and I don’t know what we have between us right now.” I stared up at him with a straight face. “Do I look like I’m joking nigga? I need some time to think.”
“No, but you should believe me, because I ain’t never gave you a reason not to. He has. I’m gonna leave, but we will get to the bottom of this. I’m gon’ find that nigga. That’s my good word. It ain’t no way I’m lettin’ you think I’d ever hurt you. I would never hurt you baby. Never. You gotta know that. You don’t need to think about it.” His eyes glistened with tears, but I didn’t think he’d let them fall.
He was a thug and thugs didn’t cry. However, he was a thug who had stolen my heart and I didn’t know if I wanted to let him keep it. At that point all I was certain of was the fact that I had enough money in the bank to not need anybody else. Cherie wasn’t talking to me and I didn’t know if I could trust her brother anymore. My pops was right when he told me not to put my faith in people.
“All you need to put faith in is your money,” he’d told me all of my life. “It’ll never fail you like people.”
“Just leave,” I said in a soft voice.
He closed the distance between us and held out his arms like he wanted an embrace. I pushed him away.
“I said leave Serg!” My voice was a lot louder that time
“You think it’s that easy for me to walk away right now when I know that you’re mad at me? You gon’ let that nigga fill your head up with bullshit after bein’ gone for two years. How you gon’ let what he told you hold any weight when you know in your heart I’m a stand up nigga? Bae, I been here for you yo’. This is me. Serg. Your lover and your protector. Ain’t no stranger standin’ in front of you. Open your eyes. I was willin’ to sacrifice my own sister for you ma. Are you serious right now?”
I wiped the hot tears from my cheeks. “I never asked you to sacrifice your sister…”
“You don’t have to ask me to do the right thing ma! I’m a goon ass nigga, but when it comes to you, I got a fuckin’ heart. I don’t play them mind games wit’ you like the nigga you married played. I’m for real ‘bout mine! I don’t waste my time tellin’ a woman the truth and that I love her for nothin’. That ain’t me! Shit. I’m gonna give you your space yo’, but it ain’t over between us. I’m pissed as fuck at you, but I know you just confused and don’t know what to believe. I get it.” He backed up toward the door. “But I love you and you ain’t goin’ nowhere ma. That’s my good word. You’ll see the truth. It’ll come to light.”
With that said, he left and closed the door. My legs felt weak as hell and suddenly gave out under me as I sobbed. When my ass touched the floor, I straightened my legs out and leaned against the wall. The tears that I’d been holding in for so long came crashing to the surface like an ocean’s tidal wave. Damn, I missed my mother. Shit, I even missed Jordan. When I looked around, I realized that nobody was there. I thought about going to see my pops, or my Aunt Mo, but I didn’t want them to see me like that.
‘Get yourself together.’ My mind told me to get up and shake that shit off, but even the strongest person could break at times.
* * *
A month later
“Wow,” I breathed as I looked over the books for Sweet Nectar Entertainment.
Just like I thought Caramel was beasting and out of all of the girls, she was bringing in the most money. She was actually doubling what Serenity was making and at first she was my biggest money maker. It was crazy because a couple days ago Serenity actually complained about losing a few of her regulars. Maybe they’d decided to try out some Caramel.
Either way, it didn’t matter to me, as long as the money was still coming in. Those hoes had to do what they had to do to compete and complaining to me wasn’t going to help. So business was booming, but my personal life was another story.
Not knowing what to believe had caused a wedge between me and Serg. He was trying his best to get back in my good graces with flowers and expensive gifts, but I didn’t know what to do. For the moment, we were on a break. Until I could figure out if he was trustworthy, I needed to be by myself.
He made me feel guilty as hell for letting what Kamal said hold any weight with me. See, it wasn’t that I believed Kamal. I was just confused as hell. What if Serg wasn’t who I thought he was, just like Kamal.
Cherie still wasn’t talking to me, although she was aware that Serg and I were having problems. She’d told Serg that she was angrier at me about keeping our relationship from her, not just the fact that we were together. I guess I had lost my friend for nothing, because although me and Serg were on speaking terms, we hadn’t been intimate since Kamal�
�s revelation.
In my heart I didn’t want to believe what Kamal had told me about Serg. Then again, I was tired of being hurt and lied to. Serg had never lied to me before that I knew of, but my trust levels were depleted. What if he really did make Kamal leave? He was part of one of the biggest drug rings in the city. What if he was even more ruthless than what I was aware of? Although I didn’t really see that side of him, like Kamal said, he was a dangerous man.
“You still need my protection,” Serg had told me over and over again. “I won’t turn my back on you. No matter what ma.”
“I’ll still use the security that you put in place for me. I don’t need your personal protection Serg. Only the girls really need to be protected anyway,” I’d protested.
“Just ‘cause you don’t sell your ass, don’t mean that you’re safe. Word about Sweet Nectar is really starting to spread and mufuckas know who you are. You got respect in the streets ma, but if it gets out that we’re not…like that anymore…the wolves are gonna come out. I’m still worried ‘bout Cuba tryna get to you.”
That conversation had taken place hours earlier, but I wasn’t really stressing that shit. I knew that my business dealings weren’t really the biggest secret anymore, but as long as the streets were only on to me and not the cops, I was good.
I’d also received the divorce papers from Kamal. The return address was the lawyer’s office, so I still had no clue where he was. Serg was still on a quest to find him and prove the truth to me. I just felt that I’d never know the real story. That was because Kamal could clearly say what Serg wanted him to out of fear.
The divorce had been finalized a week ago without a hitch and I wondered if Kamal would marry Jordan. Then I wondered if they had children. Then I wondered why I even cared? That part of my life was over.
I thought about moving away, since I’d be able to run my business from anywhere. One good idea that Serg had was expanding the business to other states. Maybe that would be a good way for me to get over all of the heartache and paint that I’d been subjected to over the years. Maybe it was time for me to plant my roots somewhere else.
A Pimp In Pumps Page 14