“The fuck it is!” He stormed out of the office heading toward the ring.
Somebody had to finish the fight and it seemed he was that somebody, even if it meant stepping into the ring himself.
“Tap out!” He yelled to Noah but the man was too far gone to understand him, or perhaps really didn’t give a damn about losing big.
And it was a complete disaster already. His injuries were going to put him out of fighting for quite some time and they all knew it. Where exactly was Tony gaining an upper hand in this scenario? Xan wondered. Could it really be as absurd as wanting to teach Xan a lesson? He refused to believe in that possibility, even though everything was leading in this direction.
He was about to step into the ring when the other fighter threw his final punch, knocking Dragon out. The crowd roared with glee, which had never sounded in his ears as vicious as at the moment, Xan thought.
He was already dialing 911 when he reached Dragon and knelt next to him. He was barely conscious and Xan wondered if he was even aware of his own surroundings.
“I told you to tap out, you stupid son of a bitch!” He muttered, feeling helpless in a way he knew too well.
People were cheering the winner and nobody seemed to care about the defeated. Noah could have been dead already to them as well, he thought, and a wave of hate that crashed into him caused him to see red.
“Let me through.” Xan looked up and shifted slightly to make a room for the doctor they had in the club in case of emergencies of any kind.
It was definitely one of them, he thought.
Peter Woodley was a forty-year-old doctor with constantly tired eyes and kind hands. Xan avoided him like the plague and it was nothing personal. He just hated dealing with medical personnel in general since his childhood. Although the times he actually got to the ER with his injuries while being a kid were few and far between.
“Call 911!” The doc told him.
“Already did.”
“Trying to do my job for me, Xan?” The man checked Dragon’s pulse and responsiveness of his pupils.
“Someone has to; why the hell didn’t you stop the fight?” He snapped.
“It’s not my place. I am here to patch you up guys if need be, not to get in the middle of your affairs.” Peter said, and Xan knew he was right.
The need to blame it on someone was spreading through his veins like wildfire and he knew it was just a matter of time before his temper would be in a full swing.
“I will go with him.” He said.
“You can drive after the ambulance, you know the rules man. Don’t make me waste time on explaining the basics to you. Now step away and let them do their work.”
Paramedics came into Xan’s view and he swallowed hard. Yeah, he wasn’t fond of medical personnel, although they were only doing their job and he was not going to delay them.
“He needs his ribs x-rayed and right kidney checked for damage.” Peter Woodley said and Xan allowed himself to feel a slight relief.
Maybe the doctor didn’t stop the fight, but he definitely watched it close enough to know what Xan noticed himself earlier.
The crowd was moved by the whole scene, but it was an unhealthy kind of interest, like drivers passing by a scene of an accident. It was mixed with some dose of solace in the fact it was not them who was being carried out on a stretcher. None of it was even the slightest compassion toward the beaten fighter.
The defeated didn’t deserve mercy; Xan knew it firsthand.
‘Remember it’s on you,” Tony said. “Now I need to buy over the paramedics so they will keep their mouths shut. I will take it off your next fight.”
“Keep pushing me Tony, we are already on the ring. Want to raise it a notch?” Xan looked at him and smirked when the other man took a step back. “Didn’t think so.”
“Don’t think you have the last word, Xan.”
“Oh I know I don’t, since we are far from being done with the subject. I’m out.”
“What do you mean you are out? Don’t forget you can’t be out. Remember the stakes?” Tony asked him.
“I don’t need your reminder,” Xan said and stepped out of the ring, pushing through the crowd still electrified by the events of the night.
He really didn’t need a reminder because not one day passed by when he didn’t think about the one night that had altered his life forever, tying him to the club and Tony in a way that could never be unbound.
People were eyeing him warily, letting him pass through, and it was then that he noticed Catalina standing between people. She was pale and her wide eyes were fixed on him.
Damn, he thought, making his way to her, wondering how the hell he managed to forget about her presence in the whole commotion, and how much it was going to cost him now.
CHAPTER 20
Catalina knew what happened behind the hidden door leading to Cul-de-sac afterhours. It was the reason why she had found herself on the scene the very first time, after all.
She knew about the not-so-legal activities, had witnessed one fight firsthand. But so far the bloody sport was bloody only in name.
Now the brutal side of it became reality and it hit her like a two-by-four or, more accurately, a perfectly performed punch nearly knocking the air out of her lungs.
Xan was a winner but she was convinced he had taken his pound of flesh before he became that good. His bruised jaw, which couldn’t be compared to injuries of the man taken by the ambulance mere minutes before, was still a vivid sign of dangers concealed in the venture he was an active participant of.
She had always been aware of leading a sheltered kind of life. Photography was her way of stepping out of her comfort zone and broadening her horizons. Catalina didn’t shy away from the harsh reality of life, but she had never played an active part in it either. No matter how often she had wished she could trade her privileged upbringing with much more informal and ordinary life, it had never happened.
Now she wondered if she lived in this normal life she’d always yearned for and if she was right to seek it out.
She observed Xan throughout the whole ordeal, both the way he handled the situation and himself. It was obvious he was at the end of his rope as far as his temper went. Yet he did what had to be done, while most of the people gathered around them didn’t act as if they comprehended how things could easily and tragically slip out of control.
Or maybe they did and that was exactly why they were agitated more than before. Sadly she didn’t think it was the right kind of anxiety vibrating in their bloodstreams.
It seemed ridiculous now to be mad at Chloé for leaving her behind or worry about dozens of unimportant things after witnessing something like that, Cat decided.
She watched Xan now as he made his way through the indifferent and capricious turnout. It was obvious he had forgotten about her presence and she didn’t mind it at all because it gave her an opportunity to see a new face of the man who, in some inexplicable way, had become important to her.
He looked miserable and furious at the same time, which was a very volatile mix of emotions and she knew it was only a matter of time before they all came to a tipping point, spewing all over.
She should have been making a U turn, leaving the dangerous zone right about now, she thought. That was what her common sense demanded of her, but she took a step forward and then another, reaching out to him instead.
Apparently she and common sense were having a falling-out.
“Are you okay?” She cupped his jaw when they met in the middle, but all she really wanted was to wrap her arms around his waist and hold on to him.
“I’m sorry I left you alone,” he said instead of answering but she was not interested in apology.
“Alex… talk to me.” She chose to use his name, reminding him that he had trusted her before.
“I am not the one who took the beating tonight,” he reminded her, taking a step back and Cat let her hands fell uselessly to her sides.
He hadn’t, not p
hysically at least, but his look suggested otherwise. She didn’t tell him that though, convinced he wouldn’t appreciate hearing it at the moment.
“I will get the keys to my car and drive you home on my way to the hospital,” Xan said, wondering why she wasn’t mad at him or terrified of what had happened but seemed ready to comfort him instead.
It took all his will not to wrap her in his arms and take her from this place. Not to take what her eyes told him she was offering. He had never leaned on anybody and now was not the time to start either.
Catalina sighed and followed him, feeling a little bit silly. He was completely closed off and she had no idea if she should back away and leave him be, or push in order to get through this wall he built between himself and the whole outer world. It was easy to recognize it since she was always doing the same. However, she was hiding behind the seamlessly polite exterior while he was locking himself away with his inner turmoil.
He didn’t invite her in but she went against her manners and entered the room he disappeared into anyway. One glance at the unmade bed and an empty box of pizza told her he had spent at least the previous night in here.
“Do you live here?” She asked and by the way he flinched she understood he forgot about her presence… again.
And while it was still understandable she wished there wasn’t going to be a third time.
“What if I do?” Xan snapped angry at her, at himself at the whole fucked up world.
He didn’t want her to see the room because while he had a perfectly acceptable apartment in the city, it still was his reality for many years before.
So much for wanting to show her more than the ugly side of his nature and the filthy world he was a part of, he scoffed at himself.
“I am not your enemy, Xan,” she sighed and decided that pushing for answers was overrated, at least in her case.
All she managed to achieve so far was directing his anger squarely at her. She should be so proud of herself, Cat thought mockingly.
“This was not my plan for tonight,” he said and moved closer, forcing her to step back until she hit the wall.
Anger was still brewing inside of him, pushing him to act his worst and he was aware there was only so much a person could take.
He wanted to reach this point with her and be done with it.
What was he thinking? He didn’t, he told himself.
He just wanted to have her but it became painfully clear why it was never going to happen. There was nothing more to lose here.
Go big or go home, he decided.
“Since you are already here…” He muttered and dipped his head covering her lips with his greedy mouth.
He curved one hand around her neck, immobilizing her, not caring how unfair and ill-advised his behavior was. His tongue sought the entrance out and pushed in with a bold demand once it was found. She moaned but then stiffened almost immediately and pushed at the wall of his chest.
Everything in him urged him to ignore it and continue, but this vicious side of his died down as fast as it came to live and he stepped away, letting her breathe.
“Come on, Cat, it’s just sex, not rocket science,” Xan smirked.
“I am not some floozy you can use whenever the mood strikes you!” She glared at him, wiping the back of her hand across her mouth, sending him a very clear message of what she thought of his kiss.
It felt beyond tempting to pick up her little challenge, but there was a little catch to her voice now, making him feel like the biggest bastard in existence.
No, she wasn’t one of the bimbos he was used to, but he hated the reminder more than ever now because it was just widening this precipice between them.
“I might understand where your mood is coming from, but I won’t be your whipping boy. Not now, not ever. Let me go!” She demanded and he couldn’t not admire the way she stood there, basically telling him to go fuck himself but in this calm and elegant manner of hers.
He knew how to answer when someone addressed him with anger equaling his own, or when a woman faced him with eyes shining from her tears no matter how fake they were.
But he was defenseless against her quiet dignity, defeated by her unfaltering class.
He sighed and leaned in close, boxing her against the wall with his hands on either side of her face instead of letting her go like she asked of him.
“I don’t know what to do with someone like you.” He admitted.
“Then we are even,” she said instead of pushing him away again.
He was no longer aggressive, although the way he boxed her in could be still considered threatening, she supposed.
“Don’t ask me to let you go.” He looked into her eyes and she held his gaze.
“Don’t act like an ass and I won’t.”
He chuckled involuntarily because the word felt wrong coming from her but sounded so damn sexy at the same time, regardless that it was hardly an endearment.
“I want to be with you.” He could say it out loud since apparently they were putting all cards on the table.
“I am still here Alex, but I am not one-night stand material.”
“Color me surprised.” He chuckled again and pressed his aching body against her soft one, not able to stop himself. “You know how much I want you; will you deny wanting me back, Kitten?
She sucked in a breath because she felt how much very clearly. And the knowledge was… titillating.
Catalina was used to men who acted with finesse and subtlety, hiding the true nature of their desires under the veneer of civilization. Xan was as far from it as one could get, she thought.
Her eyelids fluttered when he cupped her cheek and she could almost taste another kiss in his hot breath.
But this one, when it came, was a fleeting, teasing thing so unlike the previous, filled not only with hunger but with echoes of viciousness he was capable of as well.
Something she would do well to remember, she told herself.
“Will you deny it?” He asked again when she didn’t respond.
“You know I can’t, but I am not ready for it, Xan.”
“I’ve figured that much, it’s okay.” Waiting wasn’t his preferable way, but it was different.
She was different.
“Is it? I know I am not like those women you are used to and…”
“Hell! Of course you are not, one of the reasons we are having this conversation in the first place. Catalina, look at me. I want you, not those other women. Are we clear on that?” He wanted to know.
“I just meant I don’t have their experience.” She blushed making him frown.
“Dammit! I don’t care how many men you were with before,” He snapped.
“And I am trying to tell you I have never been with anyone, but you are making it more difficult than it already is!” She said desperately, unhappy with the direction their conversation had taken.
“What?” He gaped at her completely taken aback.
This was the last thing he could have expected, Xan decided.
“You’ve heard me perfectly the first time.” She raised her chin in a haughty way which any other time would have provoked him.
She waited for him to laugh, to comment on her words, maybe being incredulous or… anything really. Because anything would be better than the sudden silence between them, only deepening her mortification.
“Forget it,” she muttered and tried to pass under his arm, but his reflexes proved perfect and intact.
Xan blocked her and cupped her cheek with one hand, bending his head to hers again. But he didn’t kiss her as she expected him to, instead his green eyes skated over her face, down her nervously working throat, over the rise and fall of her breasts and up again.
“Forget it, Cat? I don’t think so,” he murmured, and she sucked in an unsteady breath. “Now I won’t be able to think about anything else.” His voice dropped even more and she shivered slightly because those eyes of his, that captivated her so from the beginning, became even bri
ghter, even more focused on her as if nothing else mattered.
Nobody had ever looked at her as if she were the center of all that was important and as much as she wanted to bask in it, there were other concerns they had left unaddressed for long enough.
“Did you find your car keys?” She asked, desperately trying to shake off the sensual spell he had her in and return to reality, no matter how bleak it was.
“Got ‘em.” He nodded and she saw the solemn look filling his gaze again.
“Then let’s go,” Catalina said softly.
CHAPTER 21
Xan was on the phone since the moment they left the club and from bits and pieces Catalina understood, he now knew who the winner of tonight’s fight was, but she was not sure what he was going to do about this tidbit of information.
And it worried her.
He also learned his friend’s whereabouts and now they were on their way to Saint John’s Health Center. Xan answered several calls, ignored others and judging from the lines of tension bracketing his mouth, all of it was only putting more strain on him.
“It’s a good hospital, you know,” she said in order to break the silence, but he just gave her a look that told her his thoughts were miles away.
“Saint John’s Health Center. Their ER is very efficient and cordial. I was a part of a committee raising funds for their cardiac department once. The entire staff I met seemed very helpful and capable,” Catalina explained and was surprised to hear him chuckle. “What?”
“Nothing, I just can’t believe I know someone who talks about raising funds and charity so casually.” He shook his head and Cat bristled.
“You make it sound so ridiculous, but those things do help.”
“Maybe, but from my experience the hospital should put a big fat dollar sign on their entrance door. It is a good place for people with deep pockets, otherwise their care leaves a lot to be desired. I guess average patients are a step lower on the hospital’s importance scale than someone who is a pillar of the respectable community.”
CUL-DE-SAC (On The Edge Book 1) Page 16