Elizabeth entered the information.
“How pregnant was she?” he asked, hesitantly. “Did she or the baby suffer?”
Whitefox looked at the man in the rearview mirror, and tears were filling Jonathan Delray’s’ eyes.
“Cordelia was around two months pregnant. The ME doubts she suffered,” and yet she didn’t tell him how she died. They were holding that close to the vest.
“I wish I could have her back. I would have married her, and we could have been a family.” Now he did break and begin sobbing.
Ethan Blackhawk reached behind him and uncuffed the man’s arms. He handed him some tissues from the box his wife was holding.
“I dated Cordy in high school, and then we broke up. I just got her back, and now she’s gone. I could have been a father, and I would have loved them both.” He blew his nose.
Callen glanced over at Elizabeth and felt for the man. He wanted to be a father too, and the only route to that was with the woman beside him. Unfortunately, it was blocked by the fact that any kids they had would be illegitimate bastards.
Just like him.
“You can take me where ever you want, and you can beat the hell out of me. Kill me for all I care! I lost the woman I love and my child. I have nothing left!”
Elizabeth nodded at Whitefox, signaling they were done with the man. They’d take him back to his truck, and let him head into work. She bought his story, not because he wept. Tears could be faked, but because she knew a lie when she heard it, and Elizabeth didn’t hear one coming from him.
As they pulled into the Adare yard, she turned and looked back at him. “Jonathan I’m sorry for your loss, and I promise I’ll find the killer.”
“I just want Cordy and my child back.”
Elizabeth knew there was no way they could give him that. Once a person was gone they weren’t ever coming back. Didn’t she know that better than anyone? First her mother, her father and now Timothy Blackhawk too. Her heart felt the telltale ache, as the tears welled up at the thought of the older man being gone.
Elizabeth wished she could bring him back. “You're free to go.”
He looked up and he was back where they started. “You're good at your job, or that’s what I hear. I hope you find the killer, before I do.” Then he hopped out of the Escalade, slamming the door.
She sincerely hoped she did too.
* * *
He saw them take the man away and question him regarding Cordelia Adare. This was a bad sign. Something had to be done and soon.
If the truth got out, everything would be ruined.
Right now he had to step in and take care of the situation, and that meant distracting the FBI until Desdemona could be grabbed. He knew how to do it. If they wouldn’t just let well enough go, he was going to have to handle it.
Tomorrow the town would be talking, but it wasn’t going to have anything to do with Cordelia and Trinity Adare. Tomorrow they’d have a bigger problem.
This was a war, and in war there were casualties.
* * *
Wednesday Afternoon
Elizabeth sat between the two men as they had lunch. The boys wanted burgers, and she just wasn’t in the mood. She missed her son and wanted to be with him desperately. Then there was the uncomfortable reality between her and Callen, regarding children. To top it all off, she missed Timothy Blackhawk. His smile, how he called her sweetheart, and would kiss her on the forehead.
Her heart just hurt today.
“You okay?” asked Blackhawk, noticing she wasn’t eating her lunch. Something was bothering Elizabeth and it had to be big if she wasn’t touching her food.
“Yeah, I’m just working through some issues that I’m having. Can I have a few minutes? I need to make a call.”
Both men nodded, and they watched her leave the table, pulling out her phone.
“Is she okay?” asked Whitefox.
Blackhawk shrugged. “I don’t know, she just looks distracted about something. It has to be big. I can’t help her through her issues, because I haven’t a clue. I can help you through what’s bugging you if you tell me what’s going on.”
Whitefox looked up and tried to clear his face.
“Nice try, but I’ve been doing this almost twelve years, profiling criminals. If you think I can’t tell your upset then you must think I suck at my job.”
“Elizabeth’s not on birth control.”
“I’m well aware. We like to let fate drive that one part of our lives.” Blackhawk was curious as to where his brother was taking this.
“What if I get her pregnant?” he asked, lowering his voice so the people around them wouldn’t be privy to their conversation.
The thought of his brother getting his wife pregnant did bother him a little, but what was he supposed to do? They decided to let him into their lives, and offer him something he desperately needed; a family. That opened them up to the possibilities that either man could be the father of her next child. Then there was the idea that if something happened to him, his brother would take over his family. If he fell in the line of duty, Callen would raise his children as his own, and he’d do the same. All their children would share the most important factor; their mother, and that outweighed everything.
Ethan had already dwelled on all of this extensively, weighing the pros and cons and finding more pros. He’d seen his brother with CJ, and he didn’t trust anyone more. Many times, Ethan found Callen with his son asleep on him, as he protectively cuddled their boy. If he had to pick a surrogate for himself, it would be the man in front of him. Ethan loved his child, and so did his brother.
“Are you worried more about what people will think or is there something else?”
“I don’t care what people think. My problem is me.” It was time to be honest with someone, and it might as well be his brother. “I’m the Blackhawk bastard, and I don’t want any child of mine to ever live that.”
“I really wish you’d stop calling yourself that. It really upsets and bothers me.”
Whitefox laughed sardonically. “It bothers you?” Now, that was funny. “Then imagine how I feel living it.”
“Cal, I can’t make you feel better over the name thing. If I could I would. I named my first son after you, because I wanted you to see that you belonged. I’m sharing the only woman in this world I love with you, and I’ve acknowledged that fact you could be the father of any of our children. I don’t know how much bigger of a Band-Aid I can put over this wound. I’m trying the best I can to fix this hole. Just tell me how to heal it, and I’ll do it.”
“I know, Ethan. Like I said, it’s just me.”
“What’s already happened has happened. If you already impregnated her, there’s nothing we can do. If you don’t want the risk, get some protection or stop having sex with her. You really only have two choices, and I think you know that. You’re a grown man, and you need to make the choice, and then stand behind it.”
“I need to think about it.”
Blackhawk shrugged. “Then think about it. No one is forcing you to have sex with Elizabeth. If you can’t handle this, stop doing it. It won’t cost you her love or mine, but you need to be the one that tells her your decision. I’m not going to drop this one on her, when it’s your issue.”
Whitefox saw Elizabeth coming back. “I’ll deal with it.”
She sat down and had obviously been crying. Both men looked alarm.
“Are you okay, baby?” asked Blackhawk, pulling her against his body protectively.
“Yes,” she sniffled. “I just called dad, and he told me CJ sat up by himself a few seconds, and I missed it.”
Blackhawk knew how hard this was for her. “Oh, baby, it’s okay. I’ll make dad record him non-stop. Even when sleeping just in case and we can go home, make popcorn, and watch CJ TV until we catch up.”
Elizabeth attempted a watery laugh, wiping her eyes. “I just miss him and granddad too. I’m just struggling today with this. All this pregnancy talk, and it r
eminds me of CJ, and he reminds me of granddad, and then I’m crying again like an idiot.”
“I miss CJ and granddad too,” confessed Whitefox. “Don’t feel bad, Lyzee. I keep thinking, ‘I should call him and check on him’ and then I realize that I can’t. It catches me at the weirdest moments.”
Elizabeth looked over at Callen. “I’m sorry to bring it up. I just felt overwhelmed for a few seconds. I’ll be okay.” She forced the tears down and just swallowed the pain. Now wasn’t the time to be distracted.
Ethan took her one hand in his, kissing her on the cheek. “You’re entitled to your feelings, baby. I miss them both too. I dream about granddad and wake up feeling empty.”
“I’m sorry you both lost him. I know how much he meant to you both. He was a sweet man, and he’s lucky he’s not here. I’d so give him hell for not telling us he was sick. I would have dragged him to the doctor at gunpoint.” Elizabeth looked up. “Do you hear that Timothy? I’m so pissed at you.”
Both men laughed and she joined them.
“That’s probably why he didn’t tell us, baby. He knew we’d make a giant production, and drag him off the Rez to take him to a million specialists.”
Whitefox changed the subject. Right now he wasn’t comfortable with talking about babies or his grandfather. “What’s next for today?”
“I need a baseline from Ethan yet. I also need to head to the lab and talk to the doctors.”
“Maybe we should get going then. Are you done with your lunch, Lyzee?” he asked, pointing at her uneaten burger.
“If I say yes, are you both going to dive at my food? Not because I mind, I just want to get clear of the carnage and not lose a limb in the process.”
Blackhawk looked at his brother. “Rock, paper, scissors? The best two out of three gets to pick first?”
“Deal.”
Elizabeth laughed and watched them do it. “When I was pregnant no one poached my food.”
Blackhawk won and grinned at his brother. “I want the fries, you get the burger.” Then he looked at his wife. “You were growing a child and that just seemed wrong.”
Whitefox snickered, grabbing her burger. “Who are you kidding? I was scared shitless she’d take off one of my arms.”
They all laughed as Elizabeth cleaned up the table they were sitting at. “You're both just lucky I can’t eat like I used to or you’d both be out of luck.”
They knew it wouldn’t matter. She loved them enough to share with them both anyway.
And always would.
* * *
When they pulled up to the lab, there was a surprise waiting for them in the parking lot. There sat Desdemona’s rental car, and she was leaning against it and obviously waiting for them.
“Who wants to deal with her?” asked Elizabeth.
“I had to do the notify, and she tried to kiss me back into her bed, so I think I’ll pass,” answered Whitefox, not realizing what he just said. When the vehicle got quiet, he looked up. “I meant…”
“This one’s mine,” stated Elizabeth, with no emotion. “Ethan, take Callen inside. I’ll be right in as soon as I neutralize this problem, I mean handle the doctor.” Elizabeth thought about the woman kissing Callen and she changed her mind. “No, I do believe I really meant ‘neutralize the problem’ once and for all.”
As the men exited the vehicle, Blackhawk punched his brother in the arm and dropped his voice really low. “Are you insane, Cal? You don’t tell the new woman that the old one made a play. That’s an invite for bloodshed, and when there’s bloodshed the man is always going to be in the line of fire. Didn’t I teach you all this when we were young?”
“I didn’t think Elizabeth would care. She knows how I feel about her.” Even as he tried to rationalize it out loud, he realized how stupid it sounded. “Hell, I’m an idiot!”
“Of course she’s going to care. You gave her the family ring and that means committed relationship. The moment you gave her that ring, your lips are prohibited from ever touching another woman again. That’s a big couple rule. No lies, no making out with other women, and no keeping secrets. If you break any of those three, you don’t get laid for a long time. Now, let’s get in from the bloodshed at least behind the glass, so we can watch the fight without getting hurt,” he said, laughing.
“My money’s on the smoking hot one in the skirt with the bad attitude,” stated Whitefox.
Blackhawk laughed. “No bet. I’ve seen her beat down men three times her size. Doctor Adare’s a goner.”
Yeah, it was wrong they were both going to enjoy this.
Blame it on the male DNA.
There were somethings that they just couldn’t be held responsible for, and this was one of them.
Elizabeth watched the men leave. “Yes?” she asked, stopping in front of Desdemona. “Is there something I can help you with?”
“I want to help in the lab. I need something to do. All I know is I feel sick to my stomach all day long over all of this, and I just need to do something other than sit at the bed and breakfast.”
“Where’s Julian?”
“He went to shower and I snuck away.”
Elizabeth laughed because she found it funny their super tracker got ditched. “Give me a few good reasons why I should let you.”
“We used to be friends.”
Elizabeth shook her head. “I don’t let friendship come in the way of my work. So you can take that off the table.”
“Because I was once almost family and you do anything for family.”
That one she had her on, except she betrayed them. “Desdemona, I’m pretty pissed at you.”
“Me? You’re sleeping with the man I’m in love with! How pissed do you think I am over all this?”
“I love my family.”
Desdemona looked over at the door, and noticed both men were staring out at them, but neither were looking at her. “Can I ask you something and will you tell me the truth?”
“You know I will, but don’t bitch later if it hurts your feelings. I tell it like it is.”
“Are you in love with him?”
Elizabeth weighed her choices between lying and the complete truth. Generally, she disliked hurting people, but this was getting old and fast.
“I’ll take it to my grave.”
Here went nothing. Damned if she did and damned if she didn’t. “I’m in love with him.”
“Were you two having an affair behind my back?”
Elizabeth looked right into her eyes. “No. I don’t cheat, and I don’t break the girlfriend code.”
Desdemona didn’t look away, as she searched for an iota of truth. “Are you having sex?”
“That’s none of your business, and I’m not going there with you. All I’ll say is that I abided by the girlfriend code until you severed that bond by putting your hands on me. What happens in our bedroom is our business, Desdemona, and I really am tired of discussing it with you and everyone else that thinks it’s up for discussion. Private life is not fodder for work.”
She nodded. “Are we ever going to be friends again? Is there a way to repair this?”
“Probably not,” she answered, truthfully. “You still have feelings for a man I’m in love with. That’s not something you’ll overcome and forget.”
“I think you’re probably right.” Desdemona thought about it. “Can I work in the lab until this is over?”
Elizabeth thought about it. “Can you be objective, Desdemona? If I told you that I suspected one of your friends or family, could you really swallow that?”
“No, but I will. I’m a scientist. I’m damn good at my job. Let me in and give me a chance to prove it.”
“Go back to the bed and breakfast. Tomorrow you can start, but you need to go and find Julian. He’s probably worried.”
“Thank you, Elizabeth.” Desdemona turned to walk away and stopped, turning back around. “You know I’ll always cherish the time I had you as a friend.” Then she walked to her Mercedes and got i
n, pulling away.
Elizabeth watched her drive away, her eyes filling with tears. She was grateful she had sunglasses on to hide behind. “So will I, Desdemona. So will I.”
And that was the complete truth.
Both men watched the women, and neither looked angry. In fact they were being civil and that was even more terrifying.
“I think I may throw up,” muttered Whitefox, as he watched the ex and Elizabeth talk.
“Elizabeth is being really calm. I’d be scared shitless if I was you,” his brother teased. “Right about now they're discussing your performance in bed.”
Callen punched his brother. “Seriously, what if that was your ex and your wife talking.”
Blackhawk grinned. “Won’t happen, because I’m pretty sure Elizabeth’s already tracked her down and killed her.” Now he was laughing. “Chill out, Cal. What’s the worse she can do? Give you back to Desdemona?”
Whitefox gave him a dirty look. “Wait! They’re done! Oh hell, Elizabeth doesn’t look happy. Son of a bitch, this is bad.”
Both men stepped back as Elizabeth walked into the ME building. “Okay I’m ready.”
“You okay, baby?”
Elizabeth shrugged. “We just had some things to discuss, to clear the air. You know, girl things.”
“Okay.” That made Callen even more nervous.
“Let’s deal with work; I hate this personal bullshit falling all over the place when I’m trying to find a killer. It pisses me off.” Elizabeth walked away, trying to regain her composure before she had to talk to Doctors Leonard and Magnus. When she finally entered the lab, both men were reading papers, oblivious to the world around them.
Finally they realized that she was standing there. “Hey, Lyzee! You came to visit us. Have more evidence or bodies?”
She laughed. “No, but I did need to talk to you both.” Finding her customary spot on an exam table, she hopped up. “You were here when Desdemona and her grandmother came in, right?”
Deep Dark Mire (An FBI Romance Thriller ~ book four) Page 41