by Tate, Sennah
I knew that she would be furious about missing her re-match. I knew that she would never forgive herself for this, even though none of it was her fault. The officials were scrambling to figure out what should be done and I saw the smug little twerp she was supposed to race sitting in the stands looking all too satisfied with himself.
My blood boiled and I wanted to punch him in his weaselly little face. If he had anything to do with this I would make him regret the day he ever heard the name Aubrey Red.
I wished more than ever to go back in time to talk to Aubrey when she wanted to talk. What if I never got the chance now? What if I never got to show her how much I cared about her?
And that’s when it hit me. I knew exactly what I had to do. Aubrey couldn’t be here for her race, but maybe they would let me race in her place. They still needed a race after all.
If I could win her re-match for her, somehow that would fix everything. I didn’t know how and I knew it didn’t make a whole lot of sense, but logic wasn’t my strong suit at that moment. Panic, worry and a frantic desire to prove my love for this woman overrode any and all logical thought.
I wasn’t even going to dwell on the love thing right now. I didn’t care what I called it any more. I just needed to make this right for her. I knew that Aubrey was the type of woman that would much prefer me racing in her place than sitting by her sick bed doing nothing.
It would likely be hours before I could see her anyway. Instead of driving myself insane with worry, I was going to do something with all of this pent up energy. And if it involved wiping the smug look off that little bastard’s face, that only sweetened the deal.
I rushed over to the conferring officials and told them my plan. It took a bit of convincing, but finally they agreed. I mentioned that Aubrey had given me some lessons and they seemed impressed by that. I didn’t know exactly what I was getting myself into, but I knew that I would do anything for her.
“Do you have your own vehicle?” one of the officials asked.
I nodded, watching with a broken heart as they towed the mangled remains of Aubrey’s Mustang away.
“I do. I’m able to do a qualifying run if you’d like.”
The man that looked to be in charge shook his head sadly.
“No, that won’t be necessary. I won’t be taking any more unnecessary risks with racers today. If you say you can do this, I will believe you. If Aubrey comes after me because you fuck up, know that I’ll be after you in return.”
I tried to laugh his threat off, I knew Aubrey wouldn’t care. Or at least I thought I knew. Maybe she wouldn’t care as long as I won, but if I lost, that may be a whole nother story.
The officials prepped me the best that they could and inspected my car thoroughly. A couple of them remarked that I was some kind of idiot for racing a car like that. I didn’t care. I didn’t care about the car at all. I didn’t even care about myself. I just wanted to do the right thing for Aubrey, come hell or high water.
When the time for Aubrey’s race approached, the announcers asked for a moment of silence to wish Aubrey a speedy recovery. The somber attitude was enough to make my skin itch with the need to get away from it all. I wasn’t good at handling these emotional situations, especially not when I was the one facing the out of control emotions. Everyone here respected Aubrey and felt bad about what happened to her, but no one else was an absolute wreck like I was.
I told myself I had to pull myself together. For Aubrey’s sake. I had to put everything she taught me into action. I couldn’t let her down. I wouldn’t let her down.
After the moment of silence, they announced the substitution. There was an audible gasp through the crowd and I found my opponent near his car looking clearly flabbergasted. He thought that he was going to win by default. I didn’t even know if there was a prize for the race or if it was just bragging rights. I didn’t care about any prizes, obviously, but I wanted more than anything to beat this guy for Aubrey. I saw the way her tie to him affected her. I didn’t even want to think about how devastated she would be if she lost by forfeit.
Everyone cheered us on as we inched our way up to the starting line. My body was awash with anxiousness. I’d never actually done this. I knew the theory behind it all and I knew some helpful tips from Aubrey, but I really was a complete novice.
That didn’t stop the lights.
Red.
My heart pounded in my ears, drowning out the sounds of the crowd and the roaring engines.
Yellow.
I tightened my grip on the steering wheel, steeling my resolve to do this thing right. I wasn’t going to disappoint Aubrey.
Green.
Chapter 26
I blinked my eyes open slowly, wincing against the bright lights. I couldn’t remember exactly where I was at first. Everything around me was white and bright and smelled like antiseptic. That triggered all of my memories to flood back. The car losing control, smoke pouring in, not being able to breathe and then nothing.
The next thing I remembered was seeing Tanner. I didn’t know if it really happened or not. I was sure that it was probably a hallucination of some sort. I’d gone into the qualifier wishing that Tanner would be there, so it only seemed reasonable that my brain conjured him there when I was under extreme duress.
I turned my head to the side and saw my parents standing there.
Great. I’d ruined my secret all on my own without any help from my blackmailer.
“Elise, we were so worried about you,” my father spoke first, surprising me. My mother was typically the one to offer me consolation, even if it was only because social norms dictated it.
I looked into my father’s face and saw real compassion there for the first time. My entire life he’d been distant and unavailable, but for the first time he was looking at me like his child. A child he loved.
“When we heard what happened… I was so scared that we would lose you,” he continued. I felt my chest constrict around the emotion that bubbled up in my chest. I was not going to sit in the hospital and cry in front of my parents. I refused.
“What were you thinking getting involved with that kind of nonsense?” my mother chimed in, ignoring the stern look my father gave her.
I sighed and closed my eyes, sinking back into my pillows. I didn’t even know the extent of my injuries and my mother was already railing into me about my poor decisions. That was exactly what I wanted to hear.
“What did the doctor’s say?” I asked in a raspy voice without looking at them.
“You’re incredibly lucky,” my father answered, “mostly a few scrapes. A concussion and some scorched tissue in your larynx, but everything should heal without complications.”
That was a relief at least. I felt surprisingly okay all things considered. I didn’t even want to think about my poor car, probably dead for good. That was enough to make me want to cry for real.
“You know,” my mother spoke again, “Chester was very disappointed to hear about your little hobby. I happen to agree with him. Racing is not something a woman of your status should debase herself with, Elise. It’s distasteful. I only hope that we’ll be able to convince him to go through with the wedding even if we have to postpone it until your injuries have healed.”
I tried to ignore the dull throbbing in my head to process everything she just said. Of course the wedding would still be happening. Why did I think that this would change anything?
I didn’t care one whit what Chester thought of my racing. As much as I had tried to keep everything a secret, the cat was out of the bag now and if they wanted to hate me for it, so be it. It wasn’t like I had a car to race any more anyway. Now, more than ever, my future looked to be a bleak landscape of subservience.
“You know what… no,” I finally spoke up after a long silence.
I opened my eyes long enough to look at my mother’s shocked expression.
“What?”
“No, mother,” I repeated without explanation.
“No
, what?” She asked, doe-eyed and confused.
“I’m not marrying Chester. I never wanted to marry him and he doesn’t care who he marries as long as they have influence. It doesn’t need to be me.”
“How can you say that, Elise? Chester is the perfect husband for you.”
“No, he’s not. My perfect husband would be someone that allowed me to have my own interests, no matter how inappropriate or distasteful. My perfect husband would not expect me to be an empty smiling dummy sitting next to him that merely nods along with everything he says. My perfect husband would care about me for all of the things that make me my own person instead of trying to shove me into some mold of what he wants in a wife. Chester is not that man. I’ve already found that man. I know that he doesn’t want anything to do with me after everything I’ve done, but it doesn’t change the fact that he holds my heart.”
My mother’s mouth hung open in shock. She was unable to come up with any response and just stood there looking like a fish gasping for air.
“This man, you love him?” My father asked, surprising me yet again.
My eyes welled up with tears. It hurt my heart to talk about Tanner like this. I wished he was here. I wished I had told him everything sooner.
“Yes, I do, very much.”
My father nodded without saying anything.
“He loves you, too,” I heard Tanner’s rich baritone and nearly gave myself whiplash turning towards the door.
He was by my bedside in an instant holding my hand in his.
“I know none of this really went how it should have, but I don’t care. If you want to be with me, I could forgive you for anything, Aubrey.”
A stray tear trickled down my face. I couldn’t believe he was really there. I couldn’t believe that he could forgive me and still want me after all of my secrets.
“Elise,” I corrected with a small smile.
He chuckled and squeezed my hand.
“Of course,” he replied, “I have something to tell you though.”
“Oh?” I asked, suddenly full of worry.
“I took your place in the race against Rex.”
“You did what?” I exclaimed, sitting up from the bed. I was surprised that they even let someone who’d never raced on the course, let alone let him take my place.
“Well, they were going to rule it a forfeit otherwise…”
I held onto his forearm with a vice-like grip, trying to squeeze the details out of him.
“Well?”
“I smoked him,” he answered with a confident grin. “Edged him out by nearly two seconds.”
“That’s amazing, Tanner! I can’t believe you did that for me.” My vision was blurry with tears again. He knew how important my race was and he made sure that everything was okay. I couldn’t have loved him more if I tried.
“Well, this is all very touching, but you’re already betrothed, Elise. Were you off cavorting with this man while you were engaged to Chester?”
Leave it to my mother to pick up on a scandal. I tried to hide the shame burning my cheeks. Tanner didn’t know I was engaged. He didn’t know about Chester, he didn’t really know anything at the moment other than my actual name. I looked at him and he seemed angry, but not with me. He looked at my mother with the same contempt that I often did. She was just out of touch with the world around her and couldn’t understand the motivations of other people.
My father rested a hand on her shoulder.
“Give it a rest.”
She looked at him with wide eyes, stuttering and stammering to try to voice her arguments.
“But… the Westmores. Chester… wedding…” she pouted, unable to form complete sentences. I’m sure she was more upset of the prospect of losing out on a big fancy party than she was about the marriage falling through.
“Just let the kids be happy, dear. If today has taught me anything, it’s that life is too precious and too short to waste on unhappiness. If this man will make Elise happy, then I will welcome him into our family, whether you agree with it or not.”
My mother opened her mouth to respond, but promptly closed it without a word. She was defeated. She knew that she couldn’t argue with my father. That went against everything she stood for.
I turned my gaze back to Tanner, smiling like a fool.
He bent down, brushed my hair from my forehead and went in for the kiss.
I sighed into him, melting under his tender kisses. I was finally home.
Epilogue
I drank my morning coffee while Elise poured over the newspaper, her laptop and a stack of real estate listings. We’d been living together for a few months with Skye still crashing on the couch and things were starting to get a little cramped in my bachelor pad.
Skye sat at the other end of the table, doodling something in her notebook. It was the weekend so she didn’t have to worry about school. She just hung out with us most of the time.
It still surprised me how quickly Elise and Skye became friends. Within days of meeting each other they were inseparable. Skye’s fashion sense had even benefited from Elise’s influence. Her hair was dyed a much more natural chestnut color with streaks of purple, most of her piercings had been removed and even her clothes seemed more grown up and appropriate. Everything appeared to have worked out for the best.
Elise circled one listing before crossing out another. She flipped through pages, typed frantically on the keyboard and repeated the whole process another three times. She’d been looking for weeks without much luck. In her words, everything was ‘too big’ or ‘too expensive’. I tried to tell her a million times over that I didn’t care about either of those things if she was happy.
She finally put her head down on the table and groaned.
“This is impossible,” she whined. “Who knew it was so difficult to find a decent place to live around here?”
I tried to suppress my laugh and pet the back of her head reassuringly.
“Well, sweetheart, would you like to go blow off some steam?”
“Ugh, gag me. It’s bad enough that you guys never stop doing it. Could you not talk about it right after breakfast?” Skye interjected making a face at us.
Elise laughed and picked her head up to look at me.
“Sure, a drive sounds nice.”
‘Blowing off steam’ was kind of our coded way of saying we were going to take the Jag out and open her up. I knew Elise was still heart-broken over losing her Mustang and driving didn’t hold the same excitement for her that it once had.
She still maintained a presence in the community; my victory in her name only heightened her fame. She kept turning down races though and I didn’t know if it was fear or merely a lack of her own vehicle. I hated to see her so conflicted over something that once brought her so much joy and I only hoped that I would be able to remedy that for her.
We left the apartment, leaving Skye behind as she made a few more snarky comments about our sex life. At least she always made both of us smile.
I handed her the keys to the Jag and she looked at them like she didn’t know what to do with them.
“Oh, Tanner… I don’t know,” she protested.
“It’s fine, Elise. You need this more than I do.”
She took the keys with trembling hands. I gave her a big kiss before we got into the car.
At first, she was stiff, but soon she fell into the familiar routine. We weren’t pushing the limits; hell, we weren’t even speeding. It was just a nice leisurely drive to shake off some stress.
“Why don’t you turn over here?” I pointed towards a neighborhood that we’d never explored. We often took roundabout ways home simply to find more parts of the city that we hadn’t discovered.
She followed my instructions, turn after turn without question. She gave me a few confused glances, but never questioned me.
“Pull in here,” I told her as she neared a bright little cottage with a ‘For Sale - Sold’ sign in the yard.
Now she looked at m
e like I was a crazy person.
“Tanner… you didn’t…”
I grinned and handed her a key.
“Go check it out, beautiful.”
She was positively giddy as she hopped out of the car and hurried to the front door. She fumbled with the key, trying to get it in the knob, but it wouldn’t fit.
She turned those tilted eyes toward me waiting for an explanation.
“Oh, did I give you the wrong key?” I asked innocently as I pulled the correct key out of my pocket and opened the door for her.
The home was spacious, but not ostentatious. There was plenty of space for the three of us… and maybe even one more. It wasn’t flashy or showy at all. It still cost more than Elise would probably be comfortable with, but she didn’t need to worry about that. I had it more than covered.
“Is it really all ours?” She asked excitedly as she darted in and out of the different rooms.
“All ours, babe.”
She came back to me and wrapped her arms around me, planting a big kiss on my lips.
“Thank you,” she whispered before resuming the kiss.
I ran my hands up and down her spine, holding her close as the kiss intensified.
I finally broke the kiss before we ended up naked in our new living room.
“Wait, there’s one more thing…”
Her eyes widened.
“There’s more?”
“Hmm… let’s see if I can remember where I put it…” I muttered, wandering through the house, opening doors, cabinets and drawers. I could tell by her expression that she was exasperated with me. She had her hands on her hips and her mouth pursed in a look that clearly said she wasn’t buying my bull shit.
“Tanner…” she grumbled as I wandered to the garage door and opened it.
“Oh, there it is! I knew I put it somewhere.”
She poked her head through the door and I thought she was going to have a heart-attack by the look on her face.
“Is that… really… you didn’t! I can’t believe you… is that for me?” she stammered, looking over the brand new ruby red Jaguar parked in our garage.