by J. H. Croix
“I can't believe this,” I said when he glanced up.
He shrugged. “I can. It's not like it hasn't happened here before. It's smart and easy pickings for somebody who just wants to make some quick cash.”
“Seriously? How much money can they be making?”
Dallas cocked his head to the side, his mouth curling up at one corner. My belly did a little flip at that. His smiles were too delicious for me.
“You don’t think like a criminal. It might not seem like much, but if they’re pulling 10K value for every break in, they pawn it off and keep the cash. These guys are headed to one of the cities, Portland or Boston probably, and selling what they steal. I'm sure they have an arrangement in place with some pawn shops. I figured I would take notes and maybe I can be a little help while I'm here,” he explained.
I nodded and took a sip of my freshly filled cup of coffee. “I’m sure Howard will appreciate it. You seem busy today. Is everything okay with work?” I asked.
He eyed me, his gaze assessing. “Nothing unusual. Some activity on a case I'm handling in Boston. You don't mind, do you?”
“No, of course not. It's your job. It's not like you expected me to be here. You certainly don’t need to do anything different because I am.”
As soon as I spoke, a thread of tension ran through me. I realized this was the point where he probably expected me to tell him what my plans were. The truth was, I wanted to stay here for the entire time that I would've been in Italy. That had been my original plan. I didn't want to go back to New York. That was the last place I wanted to be. Even though it would be nice to see my family, I wasn’t up for anyone feeling bad for me about how things ended with Matthew. I preferred to stay here and lose myself in Dallas. Even though I knew it was a potentially disastrous idea, I’d patch up my heart and face the world later.
Chapter 13
Dallas
“Cole, do you think I need to come down there?” I asked, running a hand through my hair and spinning to look out the dining room windows. Audrey had gone outside to gather some balsam fir to make a wreath. Her bright red coat stood out against the snow as she walked through the trees at the edge of the yard, gathering branches that had fallen to the ground. I laughed to myself. Of course she wouldn't cut the branches. That wasn't her style.
Cole interrupted my train of thought. That’s how easily distracted I was with Audrey. I prided myself on staying focused, and all it took was a gap between sentences and my mind spun to her like a weather vane in the wind.
“You don't have to come down, but it would probably help if you did,” Cole replied. “We’ll have him here for questioning by tonight. I can handle it, but if you were here, obviously you would handle the interview.”
My eyes tracked Audrey’s progress through the trees. I gave myself a shake, bringing my attention back to the phone call.
“Dallas?” Cole said.
I realized I’d waited a little too long before replying when he spoke. “You know what? I'll be there. I'll probably come down for tonight, do the interview and maybe stay through tomorrow, or the day after. Sound like a plan?”
“Of course.”
He paused, and I sensed he wanted to ask me something. He cleared his throat.
“You doing okay?” he finally asked.
“Yeah. Of course. Why do you ask?”
“It's not that I don't think you deserve a vacation, but normally I would've expected you to already be on your way to Boston after our call this morning,” he explained.
“Just taking care of a few things up here. I was actually helping the chief of police review details on the run of break-ins they’ve had here. That’s the reason I'm up here to check on the house. But you're right. Normally, I would already be there. I’m testing myself to see if I can handle a vacation,” I said with a little laugh.
Cole accepted my explanation, and we ended the call. I set the phone down on the table and spun back to watch Audrey in the yard. She had a small armful of balsam boughs now, definitely enough for a wreath. As she returned and walked back towards the house, the wind blew her hair in a wild swirl. My heart twisted in my chest. Cole was exactly right. Usually I would've been in Boston already. Hell, normally I’d have taken his call in the middle of the night and left right then.
I had a convenient excuse with Howard showing up today, but the truth was the only reason I wasn't already in Boston was because of Audrey. It made no fucking sense what I was doing. I’d given into need and longing, trying to convince myself that's all it was, and it would be enough. Stupidest thing I'd ever done. I gave myself a hard mental shake. It would probably be best for me to go to Boston. Probably best to stay more than a day or two. With Audrey here, the superficial reason of staying to keep an eye on the house was no longer necessary. I could let Warren know I had to leave for work, and I knew he wouldn't mind. There was a whole host of other things to consider. For example, he would then be worried about Audrey being here alone. They would probably want her to come visit with them.
I didn't know how she felt about that, but I sensed she didn't want to and for good reason. Hell, if I were her, I wouldn't either. She would be explaining things, trying to convince people not to feel bad, and trying to put a good spin on it. Separate from my own feelings, and I had somehow convinced myself I was separating them from this equation, it appeared she was relieved to have things over with Matthew. It appeared she wasn't too hurt beyond having her pride stung due to the betrayal. He’d clearly hurt her, but it was obvious she hadn’t loved him.
For that, I was relieved. If she had, I probably would’ve punched him the other night. As it was, it had been entirely unnecessary. Audrey had stood up for herself and hadn't hesitated to hold her ground. She’d been glorious. I loved that feisty side of her. Damn. I was so fucked. It wasn't just lust, and I knew it. I spun away from the window when I saw her getting closer to the house, immediately sitting down in front of my computer and zapping off a few emails.
The investigation Cole had called about was a big one. They’d arrested one of our main targets in Connecticut and were bringing him up to Boston tonight. It was the biggest break we'd had thus far. My specialty was financial crimes, and this investigation had started there. The trail of money had led us to a massive human trafficking operation that ran out of Boston and New York. I wanted the chance to interview this guy. I had confidence in Cole though and had no doubt he could handle it as well as me. I was questioning leaving because Audrey was here. Which was all the more reason why I needed to go. I needed to draw that line for myself, as well as for her.
Cold air swirled in from the entryway as she entered. The front door sat in the center of the house with archways on either side, one leading to the living room and the other to the dining room and kitchen. I heard her kicking the snow off of her boots and then she stepped into the archway. Her cheeks were rosy, her lips pink, and her eyes bright. She was fucking gorgeous. She held up the cluster of balsam boughs.
“Just enough for a wreath. I didn't have to cut anything,” she announced with a grin.
I managed to smile. I didn't know what it was about her decorating, but it made me feel strange. It made me want things I wasn't supposed to want. My job occupied most of my life in Boston. There would be no way that I could have the kind of life Audrey wanted and deserved. Even if I convinced myself I could, she’d be watching me work late nights and take off at odd hours during investigations.
It wouldn’t hurt you to work less.
Shut up.
Audrey’s a grown woman and plenty strong. She can make her own choice. You shouldn’t make it for her.
Shut up.
Great internal debate. I held her gaze and smiled, though it hurt a little. “So you did. Will that go on the front door?”
She nodded, glancing down to shake some of the snow from the boughs onto the tile floor.
I considered that I should tell her now I would be going to Boston for a few days, but I didn't. I watc
hed her walk off into the back porch behind the kitchen where she got to work weaving the wreath together. I went upstairs to pack. I heard her footsteps come up the stairs and stop in the doorway into the guest bedroom.
“Where are you going?” she asked.
I zipped my bag closed and spun to look at her, keeping my expression calm. “They made an arrest in Connecticut for an investigation I’ve been handling. I need to go to Boston tonight for interviews.”
She was quiet for a beat, while my heart twisted in my chest. “Okay, drive safe.”
I didn't know what I'd expected, but a small part of me had wanted her to argue the point. Hell, I wanted her to go with me. I didn't say anything and simply nodded, swallowing against the tight feeling in my throat. Her eyes had gone from open to guarded. I hated it. But this was completely necessary. She didn't need to think I could be someone who I wasn't. I loved my job, and I was damn good at it. I couldn't consider giving it up for something domestic like love. I almost flinched internally when that word passed through my mind.
“Do you need me to make some coffee for you to go?” she asked as she turned and walked back down the hallway.
She was always so polite. Of course, she would offer to do that, and it made it all the harder to leave.
“Sure,” I said quickly, snagging my bag and following her down the stairs.
I jogged outside to start my car, returning to find her prepping a pot of coffee. We waited in silence while the coffee brewed. If she was upset, I couldn't feel it. She’d walled herself off from me. I could feel the distance she created acutely. I hated that too. I hated all of this. I wanted to step to her, run my hands through her hair, cup her cheeks, and kiss her. I wanted to tell her I would be back tonight. Because for her, I would make the four hour drive to Boston and back in the same day, if only so I could fall asleep beside her again.
I didn't do any of that. She filled a thermos and handed it to me.
“Will you text me when you get there? The roads are icy,” she said conversationally. “When do you think you’ll be back?”
I hesitated, staring into the layers of her eyes, the swirl of colors in the depths. I saw a hint of hurt, but she was too proud to let it show. I’d made my limits clear, and she would respect them. Even though right now, I wished like hell she wouldn't.
“Either tomorrow or the day after,” I finally said. “I should know tonight.”
She simply nodded and saw me to the door. For a flash, I considered kissing her, but I didn't. I turned, walked to my car and drove away.
Chapter 14
Audrey
“Dammit, dammit, dammit,” I said to no one.
Because no one was here but me. I was in this fucking house alone, which was exactly what I’d thought I wanted when I drove up here a few days ago. But that was before I saw Dallas, that was before I let myself tumble into this madness with him. That was before I’d realized with painful clarity what a hold he still had on my heart, my body, my soul, and my mind. Sweet hell. I could not keep him out of my thoughts. I'd gone on a crazy cleaning spree the following afternoon after he left. My parents usually spent a month or two here in the summer and often came up every few months in between to check on things, maybe stay for a long weekend. The house didn't get regular cleanings, so I’d gone nuts. I’d cleaned all of the bathrooms and the kitchen. I’d swept, vacuumed and mopped. I’d been restless and needed something to burn off my energy.
I was filthy by the time it was over, so I took a quick shower and pulled on my most comfortable pair of fleece sweatpants and a fleece sweatshirt. I settled into the living room couch with a blanket and a cup of hot cocoa, intending to lose myself in silly television. I was deep into a ridiculous reality show when I heard a sound in the background. I couldn't figure out what it was, but it kept up. I finally turned off the TV and listened. It sounded like a dog whining. I walked to the back door off of the kitchen porch to find said dog shivering in the cold by the door.
The dog was a medium-sized, golden colored dog. It didn't quite look like a golden retriever, but some sort of mix. I held my hand out, kneeling inside the door.
“Hey sweetie, did you want to come in?”
The dog eyed me cautiously, but made no move from its spot a few feet away. It let out another shivering whine. I left the porch door open and returned to the kitchen. I snagged a few pieces of sandwich meat, figuring if anything could bribe the little dog, maybe this would. Returning to the porch, I found the dog had sidled into the corner inside the porch. It was still shivering, but at least here it was out of the wind. I walked carefully to the porch door and closed it before kneeling down again. I held out my hand with the tempting sandwich meat and waited. After a brief standoff, the dog came over, sniffed my hand and took a cautious bite of the deli turkey. That’s all it took and then it followed me right inside.
I loved dogs. That had been another point of contention between Matthew and I. He’d declared he didn't hate them, but he thought they were messy and not worth it. I should've known then he wasn’t worth my time. I gave myself a shake. It didn't matter. Matthew and I were over. This was a new chapter for me, and this little stray had just showed up to take part. I allowed the dog to meander about downstairs while I looked through the pantry, wondering if we had any of the old canned food that we used to feed my last childhood dog, Bradley.
When I couldn’t find any, I made some rice and chicken. Our vet had always said this was the best thing to start with when Bradley had an upset stomach. I figured I could safely feed this to the dog until I could go to the store tomorrow. The dog quickly came over when I set the food on the floor. While the dog was eating, I leaned over to ascertain whether this was a boy or a girl. Definitely a girl. I decided to call her Molly. After she finished eating, she cautiously approached me when I held my hand out. In short order, she seemed to decide I was safe.
I curled up on the couch and didn't even bother trying to keep her from climbing up there with me. Finding her made Dallas’ absence less sharp. I was busy petting her and telling myself it was good Dallas had left. I needed to remember I was here to get my head on straight after everything with Matthew. I didn’t need to dive right into something with anyone, much less Dallas. At least that's what I told myself.
My phone buzzed, and I picked it up to see a text from Dallas.
Letting you know I won’t make it back until tomorrow at the earliest.
I stared at his text, my heart clenching. Dammit, why did this little tiny thing matter so much to me?
Thanks for letting me know.
I didn't expect him to reply, but then he did.
How are things there?
I stared at his question, wondering what to say. The true answer would be:
I miss you and wish you would come back.
But I couldn't say that. I stuck to the concrete.
I cleaned the house and found a dog.
?
I assume you're asking about the dog, not cleaning the house.
I could practically feel him laughing when I got the eye roll emoticon in return. I heard a dog whining outside. No collar and pretty thin. So she’s here now. I've named her Molly. When you come back, she'll be here. I hope everything’s okay with your investigation.
When he didn’t reply, I set the phone down, thinking that was it.
A while later my phone buzzed again.
I miss you.
My heart went a little bit crazy.
Chapter 15
Dallas
I threw a file folder on the desk and plunked down in the chair across from Cole. Running a hand through my hair, I sighed.
“Well, I think we got as much as we could for now,” I said.
Cole nodded. “Agreed. This guy’s not ready to fold yet, but we’ll get there. Right now, he's busy trying to keep himself out of trouble. You planning on staying through until tomorrow?”
I eyed him, considering his question. The easy answer would be yes. Yet, I was odd
ly distracted. The only time I hadn't been distracted was when I was in the interview room. Then my attention was laser focused. At all other times, Audrey kept dancing along the edges of my thoughts. I’d missed her like hell last night. Staring down into another night without her made me so uncomfortable, I shied away from thinking about it. I looked over at Cole.
“Dunno. Do you think it's necessary?”
Cole looked across at me, his dark gaze assessing. Cole knew me well. We’d worked together for years. I sensed he noticed something was off with me, but he stayed quiet.
“I don't think it's necessary. I'd say you probably still need that vacation,” he finally replied.
“Why do you say that?” I asked, feeling slightly defensive.
I rolled my head from side to side, attempting to ease the tension bundled in my neck and shoulders.
“You seem a little off that's all. Everybody needs a break, so let yourself have one.”
I nodded and stood, quickly striding to the corner in his office where there was a coffee pot. I poured myself a cup and took a sip. I spun back to look at him, holding the paper cup aloft. “I see you're still an expert at shitty coffee.”
Cole flashed a grin and leaned back in his chair with a chuckle. “Gets the job done, and that’s all that matters.”
“That it does. All right, I'm gonna check on a few things in my office. I'll let you know later if I'm staying or going.”
He nodded, his eyes already on his laptop on his desk. I returned to my office, quickly rifling through the stack of mail and files my receptionist had left on my desk. She'd been gone for the day before I’d gotten here. I'd arrived in Boston by six-thirty in the evening yesterday and worked until past midnight. It was now going on nine o’clock the following night. I glanced at the clock on the wall, considering what time I would arrive in Haven’s Bay if I were to leave now—around one in the morning. I made a quick decision I would stay the night and head north in the morning.