“You, on the other hand, are a different matter,” he said softly, his breath warm against her cheek. She quivered at the low timbre of his voice, so deep and dark when they were all alone like this. “You are definitely someone that I’m attracted to. And you smell amazing.”
You do, too.
She didn’t know how long they sat there and stared into one another’s eyes. They were in their own little world tonight with the ice glistening all around them and the town tucked up into their own homes. She took in a lungful of his scent, her head spinning as it hit her veins. She could get lost in a man like this.
That’s the one thing I’m not ready to do.
“Marshmallows.”
Smiling, he sat back slightly. “Marshmallows?”
She swallowed hard, loath to end the moment but knowing she must. The pull toward him was strong and she could tell they both felt it. If she stayed here, something…physical was going to happen. “Yes, we should toast some marshmallows. You know, for dessert.”
Before he could even reply she was standing, tugging her sweater down where it had rucked up. “I’ll go get them. I’ll be right back.”
If he thought she was acting strangely, he didn’t say it out loud.
“Do you need any help?”
Tons. It would be nice if you could be an asshole. I’m falling for you and this is a tad inconvenient.
“I’ve got it.”
She turned and fled into the kitchen, but it was only a temporary respite. She couldn’t run forever, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Ryan opened one eye slightly, shaking off the sleep that lay heavily on him. A gap in the drapes showed that it was still dark outside, although he didn’t know exactly what time it was. Normally he’d be sleeping but a sound had woken him from his slumber in front of the fireplace.
He and Sierra had talked until almost midnight before making up a couple of beds – his on the floor and hers on the couch – near the fireplace and going to sleep. A glance at the empty sofa told him that what he’d heard had been Sierra. Sitting up, he looked around and saw her shadow in the kitchen moving about. Strangely, she hadn’t taken the flashlight with her. If she wanted a drink or a snack, she was doing it in the dark. She must not want to wake him up, which was sweet.
Still dressed in sweatpants and a t-shirt, he stretched and stood, folding the blankets back. Despite the cold temperatures outside and the lack of electricity the small living room was pretty comfortable. The fire would need to be stoked up and more wood added but it was putting out a great deal of heat just from the simmering embers.
Padding on bare feet, he didn’t try and be quiet. Scaring or surprising her was not on the agenda. It was better that she knew he was coming and this time he was going to bring a flashlight.
“Are you okay?”
Without shining the light in her eyes, he focused the beam close enough that her form was illuminated. She was down bent over, her legs together, touching her toes and then reaching as high up as she could go, before repeating the process.
Ryan heard a heavy sigh and then Sierra straightened, her hands laced behind her head in another stretch.
“I have a bad back and sometimes I can’t sleep.”
She was what…thirty or a little more? Far too young to have a bad back unless she had an injury. Maybe from sports or a job in the past.
“Did you hurt yourself? Do you have some sort of injury?”
There was silence and for a moment he thought she wasn’t going to answer.
“Yes, I have an injury. I…spent some time in the hospital a few years ago. I have some lingering effects from then.”
She didn’t elaborate on how she’d been injured. It might have been a nasty car accident. One of his brothers had been hit from behind and to this day had a bad back and neck from it. He could tell when it was going to rain.
“Do you have some medicine for it? You know…an ointment? I could rub it on your back.”
Now why did he say that? The words had jumped out of his mouth before he’d fully engaged his sleepy brain. He couldn’t deny, however, the fact that he wanted to touch her and make her feel better. The thought of her in pain bothered him far more than it should.
Once again there was a long silence before she spoke.
“Yes, I have some of that stuff that goes cold. It’s in the bedroom.”
He had the flashlight. “If you tell me where it is, I can get it for you.”
“No!” Her tone sounded distressed. “It’s…in my nightstand drawer. I can get it.”
Now his mind was wandering places it shouldn’t go. Just what did this woman have in her nightstand drawer that she didn’t want him to see? Toys? Condoms? Porn?
It’s none of my business.
He held out the flashlight. “You’ll need this. I’ll wait by the fire. There’s plenty of light in there without it.”
She accepted it without a word and left the kitchen so he went back into the living room, stoking up the fire and adding another log. Chuckling, he wondered what he’d be doing at this moment if he hadn’t smelled Sierra cooking dinner last night. Probably freezing his sorry ass off next door and trying not to fall asleep and die. Or maybe he would have come over anyway, found another excuse to see her.
That’s what I would have done.
Pushing the blankets into a makeshift pallet she could lie on, he gave himself a stern talking to. This was only because she was in pain. She’d turned him down when he’d asked her out, although he could swear he saw an answering desire in her gaze. He wasn’t a callow youth who didn’t know shit about females. He was an experienced man who had been around the block a time or two. He could feel the mutual attraction as if it were a living thing but Sierra was running from it. He’d almost kissed her last night but his instincts had held him back.
She had to come to him. He wasn’t the type to keep pushing or negotiating for what he wanted. He’d put it out there that he was attracted to her but the next move? She had to make it.
Ryan was so lost in thought that he hadn’t heard her come back into the living room until she sat down on the floor next to him, shyly holding out a tube of a recognizable brand of gel for aches and pains. He’d used it himself a few times for sore muscles.
She looked nervous, her top teeth sinking down into her lush lower lip. “How do you want to do this?”
That’s a loaded question. Any way you want to, honey.
Stay focused, man. Keep it together.
“Where all do you want this? Your upper back? Lower?”
She reached around and placed her hand on her lower spine. “Here and up on my shoulder blades too, if that’s okay.”
That was fine. The thought of getting to touch that much exposed flesh was exciting him like a schoolboy. He was acting like it had been months or years since he’d had sex. This was a simple act of kindness. Sierra was in pain and he had the means to aid it. This wasn’t about his baser instincts.
At least, it shouldn’t be.
Except that she totally looked adorable in her red plaid flannel pajama pants and black t-shirt. She was definitely not wearing a bra and despite the emanating heat from the fire her nipples poked against the cotton fabric, constantly drawing his attention. Her long hair was piled up in a messy bun on top of her head and it showed off the exquisite bone structure of her face. She wasn’t wearing a smidgen of makeup but she was still incredibly gorgeous.
Frankly, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d been in this intimate of a situation with a woman and the outcome hadn’t been sex. There had been wine earlier, a roaring fire, blankets on the floor. Wasn’t that the perfect recipe for wild lovemaking?
Jesus, I have sex on the brain. When did I become such a horndog?
“That’s fine. Do you want to lie down on your stomach?”
Her eyes widened at his request but she did anyway, stretching out on the blankets he’d arranged for her comfort. He twisted
off the top and was about to squirt a bunch into his palm but paused when he realized they still had one problem.
“You’re going to have to lift your shirt.” He cleared his throat and shifted slightly. “It would be easier if you took it off. I don’t want to get this stuff on it. It might stain.”
There was only a moment of hesitation and then she reached down and tugged her t-shirt up all the while still lying down, her front modestly turned away from him. She didn’t toss it away, instead setting it right next to her as if to remind him that cover was only a fingertip away. Don’t try anything, buddy.
He wouldn’t dream of it. He’d meant it about her making the next move.
I’m not that hard up. I’m not the type to seduce an unwilling woman.
The gel was cold in his hand and he tried to warm it up between his fingers, but she still jumped slightly when he touched her skin. At first, he made long sweeping strokes up and down her back before concentrating on the spot between her shoulder blades that made her sigh and squirm.
Story boards for his next film. Baseball statistics. A Bolognese recipe that his mother had taught him. Ryan thought about anything and everything to keep from becoming aroused just stroking Sierra’s beautifully soft skin. His fingers trailed up her sides, tickling her ribcage and she giggled, a sound that made his chest tight. He needed to keep his head on straight and not let a little bit of bare flesh make him crazy.
But oh, what bare flesh it was.
Creamy and soft, it glowed like pearls in the firelight. There was a freckle on one shoulder and another near the base of her spine. He had to resist an overwhelming urge to lean down and press his lips to it before trailing upward…or downward. At this point, he wasn’t fussy. Her pajama pants had ridden lower on her hips and he could just spy the dimples at the top of her delightful bottom. He wouldn’t mind kissing those, too.
His loose sweatpants had become increasingly uncomfortable and he should stop all of this madness. Right now. Pull his hands away from her tempting torso and put the cap back on his lust and this pain gel. Maybe standing outside in the ice and snow for a few hours would cool off his ardor.
But he simply wasn’t going to do that. Because he was stupid and he didn’t have a lick of common sense. Defiantly, he squeezed more gel onto his palm. Like his dad always used to say…
If a job is worth doing, it’s worth doing well.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Sierra was going slowly, excruciatingly insane. Ryan’s touch was incredibly gentle, yet sensual at the same time. It had been a long time for her…too long if her sizzling reaction was anything to go by. With barely a brush of his fingers, she’d gone up in flames. She’d long ago forgotten any pain or discomfort in her back but she wouldn’t budge from this spot for anything. It felt too wondrous and amazing.
That tension that had been building between them all night was so thick it was like a stack of bricks pushing her into the blankets, keeping her from stopping him. Not that she wanted to. If she had her way, this would go on forever and ever. It was like floating on a cloud of pleasure and no one came down from Cloud Nine voluntarily.
Get a hold of yourself.
Nope, don’t think I will. This feels far too good and I don’t want to stop.
I want this and there’s no good reason not to have it. And him.
Billie’s words were echoing in Sierra’s brain. Have fun. Enjoy yourself. You deserve this.
All the reasons she should just go for it. The only thing holding her back was her own self-doubt. Ryan had made it clear he wanted her, she could see it in his eyes. He was also aware that she returned those feelings. She was terrible at hiding the attraction.
The tension had been simmering between them all night and this had really been inevitable, if she were honest with herself. She’d known it when she’d invited him to stay with her. She could say she simply didn’t want him to freeze to death but deep inside she’d known what it meant. Their crazy back and forth flirtation was about to come to an end. They were going to take the next scary – for her, at least – step. He might be far out of her league but right now she wanted him so much she didn’t care.
You set the ground rules, then he won’t know you don’t know the game.
Lifting up slightly, Sierra reached for her shirt and slid it under her, holding it over her breasts. She needed every ounce of bravery at this point to go so far out of her comfort zone. Feeling her movement, he’d paused as she turned over. For some reason, it was important to see his expression, the look in his eyes.
“Feel better?”
She did but it was only partly from the gel he’d rubbed so carefully and gently into her sore back.
“Yes,” she said, automatically nodding. “I–I think we need to talk.”
His lips twisted and he sucked in a sharp breath. “Believe me, I’m not trying to pressure you, honey. I swear. I get it. You said no and that’s it. I can accept rejection. I may not like it but I can take it.”
If she didn’t do it now, she’d chicken out and always wonder what might have been. With every ounce of courage she possessed she sat up and cupped his stubbled cheek with the palm of her hand.
“Ryan, I’m not saying no. I’m saying yes.”
* * *
Ryan didn’t move at first, seemingly stunned by her admission. He stared for a long moment and then a smile spread across his too handsome face. Her own heart lurched in her chest and the breath she’d been holding blew out slowly. Despite her inexperience, she hadn’t been reading the situation wrong.
That had been a real fear in the back of her head. That she’d imagined all this sexual tension between them and if she made a move he’d be confused. Then he’d have to let her down gently and that would be a nightmare. How on earth could she possible finish the movie and see him every day when she was mortified to her very bones?
His fingers brushed up her arm and curled around the back of her neck. For a moment she tensed, memories of not-so-gentle touches flooding her brain but then she reminded herself that this was Ryan. This wasn’t her evil ex-husband. She relaxed against his hand, enjoying the tingle that flesh on flesh brought. This was what she’d craved. Two people touching, wanting to bring the other pleasure. She barely remembered it.
“Are you sure?” He looked happy but conflicted. “Baby, I really like you and believe me, I want to make love to you but you have to know that I’m–”
She placed her own fingers over his lips. “It’s okay. I’m not looking for a commitment. I’m definitely not looking for a husband.”
That was literally the last thing she wanted.
His shoulders sagged in relief but there was still hesitation in his eyes. “It’s just my work takes me all over the world–”
“I mean it, Ryan. I get it. We both have busy careers. I’m not trying to make this something it’s not. We’re both adults here and we both know not everything leads to forever.”
She hadn’t thought it would be this difficult to convince him. In her experience, a man would just go for it when given the green light. Or even a yellow one.
There was honesty in his gaze, but there was fear, too. He might be thinking that she would pull away if he spoke too much of the truth.
“I just don’t want there to be any misunderstandings,” he said, his voice hoarse and tortured. “I can’t offer you anything past this ice storm and that sounds really piss poor. I wouldn’t blame you if you threw me out in the cold. You deserve better.”
That made her smile. He didn’t get it at all. “What is it with all men that you think women are only after one thing – a husband? I’m not. I’m not looking for commitment. I’ve had that and frankly, it wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. What I’m looking for now is some no-strings fun. Just some time to enjoy myself while the power’s out and it’s freezing. There’s no one here but you and me, Ryan. This can just be for us. No one else.”
This is no time to be nervous or scared. Go for it. This is your cha
nce.
She didn’t know if she’d convinced him but if she hadn’t he didn’t seem to care any longer, groaning deep in his chest and capturing her lips with his own. They fell back on the cushions together, his hands immediately tugging away the shirt she’d used to cover her bare breasts. At the same time, her own impatient fingers were pulling his t-shirt from the waistband of his sweatpants. She couldn’t wait to feel every inch of his flesh pressed to every inch of her own.
His tongue swiped at her lower lip, gaining access to her mouth. His kiss was playful but demanding. He wasn’t content for her to play a passive role as she was used to. He wanted her to be a full participant and she reveled in the opportunity to return each kiss and caress with one or two of her own.
Kicking his pants away, he was totally naked to her gaze and she feasted on the perfect specimen of male beauty in front of her. Muscular but not overly so, he had a body more like a swimmer than a body builder. Wide shoulders, ridged abs, and powerful thighs. His skin glowed golden in the firelight and she couldn’t stop herself from reaching out and running her fingers down his torso, drawing a moan from his lips.
She hadn’t realized how sexy it could be listening to a man moan and groan from pleasure she was giving him but it was a heady concoction. It made her even bolder and she allowed her fingertips to wander all over his chest and shoulders before meandering down the silky treasure trail low on his belly.
She wanted to wrap her hand around him, measure with her fingers to be sure her eyes weren’t deceiving her. He was long, hard, and thick, and as a woman who had only seen two cocks in her entire life he seemed far too large to be real. It was a little intimidating but beautiful all at the same time.
“Baby,” he rasped as her fingernail traced a blue vein down the side of his cock. It jumped when she touched it, drawing a giggle from her lips. “You’re killing me here.”
Sierra looked up and frowned. “Do you want me to stop?”
And the Winner Is Page 7