So, it's all set. I'm moving to St James in a month. A part of me boggles at the thought of leaving home. Is it possible to live in any place other than here? This apartment is the only place I have lived in since I was born. I am strangely excited at the thought of leaving everything familiar, to go into the unknown. And yet, the thought of going to boarding school frightens me too. It sounds so … so final. As if I am being packed off, almost punished. Will I ever come back home? Will my friends in Bombay forget me when I am gone? I'm not sure I want to go. But it will be cool to be on my own. To be away from home. It's thrilling … But scary. As I am preparing to head off, Dad's called away on another hotshot, super-secret assignment.
It's been a while since he's been away on one of these. The past few days Mum has been quiet. Sulking. She doesn't want him to go. I can tell she's worried about him and will miss him. But she doesn't say any of this to him. Just stays in their bedroom, moping. Her bad mood hangs over the entire house. We kids tiptoe around her, not wanting to catch her attention. If we do she'll just scold us, take her anger out on us.
The day of Dad's leaving arrives. His packed bags are by the door. And he's wearing his shoes, now ready to leave.
As if that's a signal, Mum saunters out of her bedroom and stands near him. If he notices her, he doesn't say anything. The silence stretches. He's good at this, Dad. Keeping quiet, waiting for the other person to speak. She sits on the sofa next to him. Stands up again. Nothing. He continues doing up his shoelaces. Finally, she snarls, "The last time you disappeared on a so-called secret mission, you came back with that boy."
"Hmm! That's true." Dad looks up and smiles. He really is in a good mood. Almost as if he's happy to be leaving. He likes these adventures, to be off by himself.
"Don't you dare surprise me again this time …" she glowers.
"I do plan to surprise you …" He grins at her raised eyebrows. Before she can reply with a cutting remark, he says. "I plan to come back with that Tiffany bracelet you have been eyeing for ages."
"Trying to bribe me?" she snaps. Wow! Not even the mention of her favorite brand is helping. She must be really upset. She's wrapping tendrils of hair around her fingers. She only does that when she is very worried.
"Yes," he says, and not caring about the three of us kids watching, he leans down to brush his lips against her. Next to me, Vishal chortles, and I nudge him to be quiet. They are never this openly affectionate with each other, don't even hold hands in front of us kids … Only fight a lot in front of us. Of course, they do care for each other. But this open kiss …? Hmm! Something's not right.
"Dad!" I run to him and hug him around the waist.
"Hey!" He bends down and hugs me fiercely. I am as tall as Mum now, but at six feet two inches, Dad still towers over me.
"Look after them when I am gone, Vik." His voice is soft, affectionate. A whiff of his cologne, lemony, musky—Old Spice—that's what he likes, wafts over me. He kisses my cheek. His freshly shaven beard is still rough against my softer skin.
Dad prefers to treat me as a man, which normally means a pat on the head or a back slap. I can't remember the last time he kissed my cheek.
"You can do that, right?" he urges. He wants to hear me promise.
I nod. "I will, Dad. You be safe too."
"I'm always careful." He ruffles my hair and sets me down, going over to gather his bags.
"When will you be back?" Mum's voice is thin, and she bites her lips, trying not to cry.
"I told you already. I don't know."
"And you can't even keep in touch with us when you are away?"
Dad shakes his head patiently. "You know the rules, Meera."
"Damn the rules!" Mum bursts out.
Vishal giggles at her swearing.
"Language, Mum." I admonish her using the same stern tone she often takes with us. I am hoping to get a smile from her. She doesn't even acknowledge my words.
"Go, go. Leave me behind, again. I know you are happy to be off, playing at being super spy or whatever it is you do …" She is looking at him, her amber eyes large, shimmering with anger and ... and tears. Is she angry with him? Or is she upset? Or both?
"Yes, I am." He grins. "Am a darn good spy too."
Dad's enjoying this; seeing her get all worked up. He knows just what to say to set her off the deep end.
Mum places her hands on her hips and just stares at him. "How dare you?" Her cheeks redden, and she makes a sound as if she's choking. She looks around as if searching for something. Uh! Oh! I know what's coming.
She picks up the closest thing at hand, the vase of flowers on the dining table and throws it at him. But Dad's quick too. He steps aside and at the same time, drops his suit bag and moves forward so quickly I don't even see him cross the floor to her. The next thing I know he is putting his arms around her, hugging her. She tries to punch him and he holds her hands down, holding her prisoner, and she is struggling to get free. What the—? Are they fighting? I move forward to help Mum, and then they are kissing. Like full on. Mouth-to-mouth and all.
Huh? What's this? Are you fighting or (ugh!) kissing, you guys? Make up your mind.
There's silence all around now. Vishal is just looking at them, mouth half open, his eyes so round I know he's never seen anyone kiss before. Unlike me.
Then, Dad is stepping back and gently kissing her on the forehead. They just look at each other for a minute, not saying anything. Mum nods as if he's just said something to her, something I can't hear. Placing his suit bag over his shoulder, he walks over and pats Vishal on his head. "Take care of your sister."
"I will." Vishal stands straight, his little chest puffing out with pleasure at being singled out by Dad.
Dad nods. He hesitates, as if about to say something else. Changing his mind, he moves away and towards the door. He stops and turns to all of us one last time. "What do you say to a soldier going off to battle?"
"Luck!" we chorus in unison. Mum keeps quiet.
"Bring back my spy safely," she says, her voice calmer now.
Dad nods. Then a last look at us and he is gone.
And so I move into the next stage of my life, much as I am going to spend the early years of adulthood. On my own.
Part II
St James
9
Age 12
"Our campus covers more than 250 acres of protected forest on the foothills of the Himalayas!" The ward mother exclaims, her voice excited.
I've made the journey from Bombay to St James with Singhji. His father worked for my grandfather all through the time they lived in Mussoorie. After grandpa died, Dad sold off the ancestral home … using the money to buy the spacious flat we live in at Breach Candy. Since Dad travels a lot on work and Mum can't leave Seema on her own to come see me that often, they tell me that Singhji is now my designated local guardian.
I drop my bags on the floor of the room that will be my home for the next five years. It's wide enough to have two beds pushed apart at opposite ends of the space. Next to each bed is a chair and table, between which is a large bookcase, with a smattering of books. I walk across and pick up one. Autobiography of a Yogi. My eyes glaze and I set it down; my eyes flick over the other one, The Hero's Journey. The third is a Mills & Boon romance, showing a muscled man in a clinch with a woman whose breasts are outlined through her thin white shirt. Her face is contorted into an expression of what is meant to convey ecstasy. Seems more like agony.
I walk to the large bay window between the beds and take in the scene. It's as if I am alone, adrift in a sea of varying shades of green. The sunlight dances off the emerald canopy which stretches all the way to the hill in the distance. It's broken in places by red-roofed structures. This is the highest I have ever been both physically and spiritually. If I reach out now I could touch the gods above.
So, this is why the ward mother sounds so happy. She's living close to the skies.
My head spins, and I grasp the window frame for support. "It's a nice view,
" I manage.
She comes over and places a hand on my shoulder. "You're a smart boy, Vikram. Outstanding grades. Spelling champion all the way."
Okay. Okay. So, I don't want to remember those agonizing spelling competitions.
"So you're a bit ahead of other people in some subjects, but you know our human abilities are pretty multifaceted. What you'll learn here will come from more than books. It'll be from your fellow students, from nature."
What's she talking about? I simply stare at her.
"What I am trying to say is, just enjoy your years here." She laughs at the surprise on my face. "I know, I know. You are so young, what I am saying probably sounds all too distant and in the future. But the friends you make here will last you a lifetime. That's how it is with school friends, and more so when you are in a boarding school like this one." She prompts, "So, be pleased your parents sent you here."
"I am," I mumble. How strange. I never told her about how lost and unwanted I was feeling. It's like she's reading my mind.
"Okay?" she asks again, eyebrows furrowed.
"Yes. Yes, I am," I say
"That's good." She smiles. "And remember, if you have any questions, you can always ask me."
I look away at that, feeling grateful, but also a little shy.
"I'm sure you'll settle in just fine," she says.
I nod. After she leaves, I continue to stare at the scenery outside. So, this is the view I will be waking up to for what seems like an impossibly long time—for the next many years.
I sit down on the cushioned seat, a wave of homesickness washing suddenly over me. I close my eyes and listen for the cook's sounds from the kitchen, the muted roar of the TV in the background, the horns honking from the ever-present traffic clogging the streets below …
The piercing cry of an unfamiliar bird jerks my eyes open, and I notice a boy at the doorway. He walks towards me, hand outstretched. His face breaks into a smile.
"I am Tenzin Wangchuck," he says.
"Are you Chinese?" I ask surveying his features with a curiosity I am trying to hide. He looks similar to our Nepali watchman. But he is so well dressed. I know he comes from a well-to-do family.
His hand falls to his side and the smile disappears, replaced with a frown that mars the smoothness of his forehead.
"From Bhutan," he says, his voice flat.
"Wow." It's my first brush with someone not from my country … and with it a sudden realization that there are kids like me in so many other places. That the world is much bigger than I thought it to be.
I smile, not quite sure what to say. Then it's my turn to hold out my hand. "Vikram Roy. From Bombay."
"Hey, Vik." He shakes my hand. Going over to his side of the room, he pulls out a large box from under his bed to the middle of the room.
"Hmm. What's in this then?" he wonders aloud.
"Aren't you supposed to open your tuck box only once a week?" I ask.
"Yes," he replies. "But why wait?" He holds up the keys. "Made a duplicate set. So I can get in whenever I want."
"Isn't that against the rules?" I frown.
"So?" He looks up, a question on his face, as if he doesn't quite understand what I mean. Opening the box, he pulls out Pringles, Maggi noodles, a jar of marmalade, Kit Kats, Toblerones and Bourbon chocolate cream biscuits. "Where is it?" he wonders aloud. Then, he turns the box upside down so a few single-packed slices of cake fall out.
"What are you looking for?" I ask.
In reply, he taps the bottom of the box while still holding it upside down. Nodding as if satisfied at the noise it makes, he slides his hands around the sides and then rips it out.
"Hey! What is it?" Now I am really intrigued.
He turns to me, holding a Playboy magazine. "See, it's good to have the family servant in your pay, don't you think?"
It's even better to have a roommate who gets showered by such care packages from home on a regular basis.
10
Age 13
I want to fit in with everyone here. I also want to stand out. It's all so confusing. I haven't stopped feeling this way since I arrived here.
It's been six months already, since I've been at St James. I am now officially a teenager. Thirteen. Not that it feels any different. More like I've gone back in time. Like I am ten again. I'm not really sure what to make of what's happening around me.
I try to focus on the basketball tournament taking place at the gym. I sit far behind the court, watching the game in progress. I feel awkward, as if everyone is watching me. Other than Tenzin, I have no other friends yet. But then, I haven't tried very hard either. Surrounded by strangers … foreigners in varying sizes and colors, for the first time in my life, I am tongue-tied. Nepalese, Koreans, Tibetans, Americans, British. They all seem so exotic. And confident. Me? I'm just ordinary.
My dorm parent tells me it's quite normal to feel a little lost, that it will take months, maybe even a year, to settle in. A year? That long?
I've always managed to make friends quickly. Before I came here. Maybe it's being this high, at the foothills of the Himalayas, but everything feels so out of balance. I am not sure I actually want to stay here.
I don't want to go home either. Everything I left behind seems tiny … little, compared to what I am discovering here.
I can't really concentrate on the game, so I give up and leave the gym. I continue walking till I have left the Quad and the main building of the school behind. A path leads into the woods behind the school. The fresh air hits me. Even after all this time I'm not used to it. I take a deep breath and the bright, white air rushes in making my head whirl. It's evening, and the shadows of the pine trees mesh together on the ground so it feels as if I am playing hopscotch with my own shadow. Their needle-shaped leaves crunching underfoot is the only sound I hear. Out of nowhere something slams into my back. What the—? What was that? I'm pushed over, doubled in pain, all my breath knocked out of me. I hear footsteps behind me.
"Hey, you okay?"
I look up into a pair of blue eyes, fringed with the longest, brownest lashes I have ever seen before. Her hair falls in a braid down her back. She's wearing a white T-shirt stained with mud and grass, and jeans torn at the knees. On her feet, faded blue-black sneakers.
"Are you hurt?" She waves a hand in front of my eyes and I snap back to the now.
"No. I'm cool." My voice comes out a little breathless. It's because I've just been hit square in the back by something that felt like a heavy brick. Of course, that's what it is.
"Oh! Good. You scared me." She walks to where a red-colored ball lies on the ground. "I would have never forgiven myself if you had been badly hurt, and at the speed this ball was travelling, it could have been quite lethal. You know what I mean?" Her words wash over me, but I can't hear what she is saying anymore. She uses her hands when she speaks. They rise and fall, like birds skimming air currents, as if they are talking to each other, in secret code, a language of their own. She picks up the ball and I notice the curve of her hips where the jeans pull tight against them. She turns, and catches me staring, and I find myself blushing.
"Well?" She rubs the ball on the front of her thighs. I can't take my eyes off her hand. "Never seen bowlers shine a ball to get better swing?" she smirks.
"Uh?" What's she talking about? It's as if she is speaking a completely alien language. Which, of course, she is for me.
"You're playing cricket?" I sound so stupid.
She shakes her head in exaggerated surprise. "Well, of course, dummy. Is there any other game to play?"
She brushes past me towards a clearing I hadn't noticed earlier.
"Well?" She looks over her shoulder. "You coming or what?"
When we reach the edge of the forest, she whistles. Catching the attention of the tall boy behind the cricket stumps, she throws him the ball, before running over to him lightly. I trail behind her, feeling just a little useless.
"What took you so long, Ash?" the tall guy asks in an ir
ritated voice.
Aware of four sets of eyes following me, I try my best not to hunch inside myself. I do need to look strong in front of Ash … who has just jumped up to kiss the boy, full on his lips, before running past him towards the far side of the field.
"I was getting you your sixth player." She gestures vaguely in my direction.
The tall boy sweeps me with a gaze that seems to go right through to my bones. "Him?"
I bristle at the tone in his voice, which implies I don't play the game—which of course I don't. Not that I am going to admit it.
The boy hasn't taken his eyes off me. Hands folded, he continues to assess me, his stance aggressive. He's older than me, a senior. I look from him to the girl and back.
"A newbie, Ash?" he drawls. "You sure about this?"
"Of course." She replies. "He fielded the ball, after all? Besides, I can spot a cricket player a mile off."
I make up my mind right then to become the best cricket player in school.
And I am going to get Ash.
"Watch carefully, and I don't mean me. Watch how I roll out the grass mats, because it's your turn tomorrow."
"What?" I grin. She's right. I was watching her. But what a picture she makes. I know I am in the throes of my first crush. But I am not fighting it particularly hard. I'll probably regret making a fool of myself over her.
Right now, I don't care.
Best to just give in and watch her. Let this feeling just pull me under. My pulse is racing; breath coming out in short bursts as if I have run a mile. I feel dizzy. Feel like jumping high in the air, leaping from treetop to treetop. Just as long as I'm with her. And that's the only reason to come here after school. I'm keeping Ash company as she rolls out the grass mats over the rocky ground between the trees. It's the only way to create a smooth enough pitch to play on.
"Tomorrow you roll out the pitch."
"Me? I don't know how to do it," I protest.
Chosen: Vik's origin story (Many Lives Prequel Book 2) Page 4