Sebastian gave me a real smile, "I called again to talk to you and Josh told me you were with the London elites." I chuckled gently at Seb's nickname for the London pack and nodded; because I didn't know what else to do.
"I love ya, kid." Then, Seb took off again.
I went over and leaned against the stairs railing. Sebastian scanned the apartment before fast walking over to the door.
"I love you too." I whispered gently.
Sebastian turned around and gave me one last smile, which told me that he had heard me. Then, he was out the door. I hung my head when I heard him relock the door. I was sad; I'd admit that to anyone. I loved Seb. He was like a second brother to me. And watching him leave was just as bad as when the pack left.
A large, warm hand rested on my shoulder and I jumped a few inches in the air. Nathan chuckled softly, but I didn't miss the sadness in his tone, expression, or eyes.
"You scared me." I stated.
Nathaniel didn't reply. He just pulled me so my back was against his chest and then he rested his chin on the top of my head.
"I worry about him." Nathan confided in me gently.
"I know." I whispered, "I do too."
We stayed like that for a while before we strayed apart. I went to my room and plopped on my bed. My curtains were open so light was freely shining in. It was only because of that, that I saw the flowers on my nightstand.
I pushed myself up so my elbow was supporting my upper body and reached out for the card.
Don't be sad for too long. I'll be back soon.
Love ya sis,
Seb
A light smile graced my lips for a second, but was quickly swept away as I laid back and thoughts clogged my brain. I thought over the day, or rather the night, and cringed at my obvious failure.
I had shown so much weakness, I was ashamed to leave my room to get something to drink. I didn't want to face any of the Durand brothers.
I punched my pillow before laying on my stomach and squeezing my eyes shut. Tears of frustration, anger, and shame entered my eyes. I wiped them away painfully and clutched my blankets in angry fists.
I had spent my entire life trying to be seen as a strong and confident warrior. I had believed I was ready for battle, but tonight showed that I wasn't. I was just a wannabe trapped in a wolf's world.
Then, I cried myself to sleep.
CL
"They camp at a state park?" Gabriel remarked from beside me. Somehow, I'm not sure how, but we got stuck in the backseat together. So far we've been in one poking fight, one small 'debate', and a food fight that got all of our snacks confiscated. To say the least, the trip was a lot of fun, and we hadn't even got to the campsite yet!
I nodded as I leaned forward so I could see where we were. "Keep going on this road." I told Nathan; who, no matter how many times he came to this thing, could never remember how to get to our campsite.
"Aren't they worried about being seen by mundanes? It is summer; camping season. This isn't the best time of the year to be ditching your clothes in the woods and going on a run as wolves." Gabriel continued.
I rolled my eyes to myself and caught Nathan's gaze when he glanced into his rearview mirror. "Do you always have to ruin my fun?" I grumbled to Gabriel.
He snorted, "I don't see how this is fun."
"You love camping!" I exclaimed in mock outrage.
Gabriel narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms like he was a two year old throwing a tantrum. "This isn't camping. This is camping with Leo. I wouldn't be surprised if he laid plastic all over the ground to keep the dirt off his precious truck, or something."
"Don't hide your feelings." I rolled my eyes sarcastically, "Tell us what you really think of the guy."
Gabriel shoved my shoulder lightly, but didn't say anything.
"Elaine," Nathan's voice brought me back to reality. I scanned the road and gave him more directions. Soon we were turning onto a gravel road. A sigh said 'Group Camping' and I grinned lightly as memories flooded into my mind.
About twelve cars were already parked along the side of the road. Nathan pulled us near the back. He had barely put the SUV in park when I opened the door and jumped out.
"Elaine," Michael grabbed my arm gently before I took off. I turned to him; waiting for some kind of lecture. "Please try and remember that you're a guest this year, and not a member."
I gritted my teeth at his words, and only trusted myself to nod.
Then Michael went to the back of the SUV to get our stuff.
I frowned at the ground and glared. I guessed that, that was Michael's way of telling me to remember my place, but it still hurt. I knew I wasn't part of the London pack. I had never been part of the London pack.
When Gabriel walked up behind me I left them.
I walked across the clearing and scanned the campsite. Tents were pitched along the edge of the tree line, but what really got my attention was the clown like tent in the center of the field. It was huge! Long tables and about a fifty or more chairs were set up underneath it.
"Leo sure goes all out for this camping trip." I said under my breath.
"Well, you know my dad." I turned and saw Caleb coming up to me. "He likes to put on a show."
I saw the hesitation in his eyes when he was about two feet away. So, I hugged him first.
"Are you feeling better?" He asked and released me. That had been the shortest hug in history, and I wondered why.
As I said, "I wish people would stop asking me that." I looked around. I found my answer in the form of my Beta. He was watching us closely from the spot he'd chosen to pitch our tents.
"Well, have fun, and call me if you need anything." Caleb told me gently.
I rolled my eyes playfully, "I've been camping here before. I know what's what."
Caleb bumped my shoulder teasingly as he passed me, and I was left alone.
I saw my sanctuary a second later and walked into the clown tent.
I plopped down on a white folding chair and rested my eyes. I was tired. The night seemed to have gone on forever, because I only got two hours of sleep. I tossed and turned as I waited for the first rays of sun to break through my curtains. Once they did I was up and drinking coffee; which told everyone about my miserable night.
Now I was begging for a bed.
"El!"
I jumped in my seat and almost went toppling to the ground. I wasn't given more than a few seconds to recover because a pair of small arms wrapped around my waist. When I saw the head of blonde hair, with their usual pink sparkly highlights, I started laughing as I hugged the seven year old back.
"Sharon!" Both the little girl and I whirled around at the motherly voice. There was Heidi, Sharon's mom, with a HUGE box of crafts in her arms. The box looked bigger than her; no joke.
I went to help but the blonde woman waved me away; or tried. "Not a chance Elaine. Don't think I didn't hear about what happened last night."
I suddenly felt like I was seven years old and about to get yelled at by my mom. Heidi had a way of doing that to me. She was practically everyone's mother. She was just like that; always looking out for you.
"I'm not that hurt." I grumbled pathetically and shuffled my feet.
Sharon grabbed my hand and led me back to my chair. "Mommy's doing face painting!" I glanced down and saw that Sharon's face had already been done up. Light pink paint with sparkles mixed in was painted around her eyes like a fairy mask.
I grinned at her and allowed her to push me back into my seat, "I can see that. You look gorgeous, kid."
Sharon blushed lightly, "D-Danke." She furrowed her brows together for a second and then looked past me. Her face told me she was silently asking a question.
"That's right." Heidi replied from behind me.
"Daddy wants me to learn German." Sharon told me.
Instinctively I scanned the camp ground. I spotted Heidi's dad standing by Caleb and Michael. Part of his attention was on us; more specifically his mate and daughter. I could tell because his
torso and head was angled towards us.
"That's great." I told Sharon.
Then, Sharon and Heidi went to work on my face. I let them pick what design they'd do and just sat back and watched everyone.
I got a sick feeling in my gut when I saw the guards. Nathaniel was among them. They stood strong to protect us while we were here, unlike how I handled the situation last night.
"Sit still, El." Sharon scolded me. I hadn't even realized that I had begun shifting around in my seat.
"Sorry." I told her and sat still as a rock until she was finished.
A few minutes later Heidi put a mirror in front of my face. There was a wolf paw print etched across my cheek.
"Perfect." I told them; forcing myself to smile and appear cheerful.
CL
"Where are you going?" I stopped when I heard Gabriel's commanding voice, and turned to face him. He was walking towards me with concern and some anger written in his features. The anger didn't bother me as much as the concern did. Anger was Gabriel's style. He'd never been one to be all soft.
"I'm going on a run." I told him firmly. I could hardly believe it myself, that I was standing with a military straight back and using the tone I often detested Nathaniel using. But desperate times called for desperate measures.
I needed to train. I needed to work. I needed to get out of my mindset; or at least the one that kept me from fighting the night before.
Gabriel gave me a long once over. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing." I told him; more emotionally than I should have. At that moment nothing mattered more to me than training. I hated feeling weak and I needed to get rid of that emotion.
Then Gabriel surprised me by nodding, "I'll come with you." I didn't say anything, and he added, "Look," His tone was serious, "I don't know a lot of these people and I don't know this area. I'm not letting you go out by yourself."
"Fine." I shrugged, and then took off.
He ran along side me. His strides were long so I had to run flat out so I could keep up, but that was fine. I needed to go fast. I needed to prove to myself that I could do it. We ran like that for a while, until I came to a small clearing. I knew from past experience that it was over eight miles away from the campsite, so I had some privacy; minus Gabriel.
Then I dropped to the floor and started doing pushups.
"Who are you and what have you done with Elaine?" Gabriel stood directly over top of me, but I didn't pay him much mind.
"I train like this a lot." I told him; only giving him a segment of my attention. I was counting in my head and trying to get lower with each pushup.
Gabriel scoffed, "Only when…" He trailed off. "Elaine stop."
"No."
He growled softly. I wasn't sure if it was out of frustration or not. "I mean it. Get up." Then he grabbed my arm.
I stood gracefully and threw a punch towards his jaw.
"Holy-" He cut himself off before he swore as he ducked hastily away from my arm. "What are you doing now?"
"Gabriel, you wanted to come. Train with me." I got into a solid stance and waited for him to do the same. All he did was stare at me like I had three heads.
Then, after what seemed like the longest second in the world, he stepped into a stance. I studied his and noticed how much stronger his looked. So, I made a few adjustments to how I was standing until I was mirroring him.
"Do you want to tell me about your new obsession?" Gabriel stepped toward and punched the air near my shoulder.
I deflected and twisted my arm around his until I was forcing him to move where I wanted him to go.
"This isn't a new obsession." I told him.
Gabriel stepped out of my hold and made a move to grab my neck.
I ducked away from his hands and jabbed him in the side.
"You don't usually train like this; especially when you're on vacation." Gabriel continued. We sparred for a few minutes before he had me in a headlock. "Now tell me; or I'll snap your neck." I could tell he was smirking; it was in his voice.
I rolled my eyes and tried to flip him, but couldn't. He had my hands, and was a lot bigger than me. I couldn't lift him.
"I hate being weak!" I growled out while still attempting to get out of his hold.
"Elaine, you haven't changed yet. Of course you're weak."
With my wounded leg I slammed down on his instep. I winced in pain, but was free to jump out of his loose grip.
"Elaine, you can't blame yourself for last night." Gabriel told me seriously. I hated the intensity of his eyes. He made me feel small, vulnerable, and everything that I despised. It was like I was transparent and he could see right into me. I started backing up. He followed my every step.
I started shaking my head, "I'm weak. Last night I froze. I cried. And I went into shock." I was trying to keep some distance between us, but I was failing at that too. "I mean, Gabriel, I have imaged thousands of different scenarios of when I go into a battle. None of them were of me shaking in fear!"
"Elaine," His forceful tone made me stop ranting. I watched as he walked right up to me. His eyes burned into mine. "Going into battle is hard for everyone, especially the first time. Last night was not your first time."
I opened my mouth to protest, but he cut me off.
"You were attacked from behind. That isn't a battle." Gabriel continued. He seemed to want to engrave this information into my brain. Then he wrapped his arms around me. "Once you change you'll be ready to fight." He whispered into my hair.
I hugged him tight; hoping and wishing that he was right.
Gabriel shifted in the embrace and hooked his arm around my neck. "Just let us protect you for a little while longer." He jokingly pleaded.
I couldn't help myself; I laughed.
Then, with his arm still around me, we walked back to the campsite.
Chapter Seventeen
Gabriel and I split up once we got back to the campsite. He went off to stand in the shadows and continue to be unsociable and I went to find a seat. I scanned the tent and saw an empty chair next to Nathan.
"Hey." I found myself whispering; which I often did when I was around a large amount of werewolves. The good thing werewolf super hearing was that I didn't have to talk really loud to be heard. Also, I found out that older werewolves prefer when you speak softly because their ears of more sensitive than most.
Nathan gave me a small grin as a greeting before turning back to the men sitting across from us. Dave was one of them, and he smiled broadly at me when I caught his eye.
I smiled back and listened as they talked about security stuff. It was boring and I found myself tuning them out. I heard a car coming up the road and turned to see bright red Mercedes coming down the gravel.
My smile died down until I was practically scowling.
A few others looked over as well, but none of them were as surprised as I was. As Marigold stepped out of her car my smile grew back tenfold. I barely concealed a laugh as I took in her stilettos and designer clothing.
She looked like she should be on a cat walk, not in the middle of the woods.
I could see her face from here. It almost seemed like she hadn't expected all this nature, because she was staring at the tent with a mix of disgust and shock.
I wondered how she survived during her changes. She definitely wasn't the type of person to like to run in the woods or get a bead of sweat on her skin.
"Is Marigold camping?" I asked as I watched her shut her car door and take an unsteady step onto the grass. I swore she could run a mile on pavement in those stilettos, but even if she had sneakers on, she'd fall on the grass. I knew that from experience.
"Like I'd actually stay on here all night?" Marigold yelled so I would hear her. She'd obviously heard my remark.
"She's staying at the inn." Leo was suddenly behind me. I glance back and see that he, Caleb, and Michael are standing about a foot away from me. I turn in my seat so I can see them without pulling a neck muscle.
I met Michael's
gaze first and grinned lightly, but turned away after a second. My gaze went straight to the London Alpha female. She had pulled out a bottle of bug repellant and was spraying every inch of herself as well as the ground she walked on.
I couldn't help it. I started laughing.
CL
I was sandwiched between Nathan and Gabriel. I'm not sure how it happened, but Gabriel someone managed to take the seat beside me. The weird thing was that we hadn't said more than words to one another. We greeted each other. That was it
He hadn't made a joke or hit my shoulder, or anything.
I was beginning to think it was broken or something. I even checked his forehead to be sure he wasn't coming down with a cold. All I managed to find out was that his temper was running on a short fuse.
He grabbed my wrist and held it in his lap so I'd stop.
I stared at him and tried to pull my wrist out of his grasp. Gabriel only smirked lightly, went back to listening to Nathaniel, who was still talking about security, and tightened his grip on my hand.
I glared at him.
"Let me go." I whispered firmly.
"You shouldn't have put your hand in my face." Gabriel shot back. He didn't sound mad though. Instead, he was amused, as if he'd just heard a joke.
I pulled on my hand again, but he only pulled back. I nearly fell right into his lap. "You're impossible." I growled deeply.
Gabriel's smirk grew and I hated that he won this fight.
"The boundaries are secure." One of the London pack males came walking up. He had a Gatorade in one hand and a road map in the other. I didn't remember him and he looked young, so I assumed he had just gone through his first change. His hair was dark brown, but I noticed that he had some red dye in it.
"Did you really expect to find Nicolais and his goons around here?" Marigold was sitting near the edge of the tent. I noticed that she kept her distance with the pack. She always found a way to keep to herself. I thought that was odd; considering she was the alpha female. Then she added, "We're in a public campsite."
Nathaniel stiffened, "They attacked my son and Elaine in the streets of London."
Marigold backed down. I didn't really blame her, but it seemed odd that she'd do that, even if it was Nathaniel. Sure, he could be really scary, but she was the alpha of this pack.
Howl (Howl Book 1) Page 22