“Sarah is going to go around front to save the girls. Now we can-”
Before she could finish her sentence, sprinters swarmed Ken and Hector. At the same time, Ehsan turned around to see two of the other officer zombies reach for the kids from the window. One grabbed Andrew before any of the adults could get close enough to free him. Andrew squirmed to get free while Sebastian stumbled away.
“ANDREW!” Julie cried.
Emma charged forward with her knife to save him. Ehsan and Fatima ran to do the same, but it was too late. The two officers fed on Andrew while Mateo fought the trenchcoat zombie, Viking zombie, two other officer zombies, and half a dozen sprinters by himself in the background. Andrew, pushed and pulled and grunted and bit as he sobbed hysterically. Mateo turned around as soon as he heard these cries, only for the trenchcoat zombie’s sword to piece his leg immediately after. Mateo, now mad with desperate rage, howled in pain and returned his focus on his opponents.
Andrew’s sobs soon stopped when the life left his body.
Ehsan went numb. His mind and body entered autopilot. He pulled Sebastian, the kid nearest to him, away from the window by the wrist and ran toward the front of the library. In front of him Fatima and Julie ran with Lucero, Sebastian, Gustavo, and Natalia. Fatima shouted something to Ehsan. He didn’t hear it. He didn’t hear anything. They reached the front of the library, zombies mere feet in front of them, Deon’s eyes wide with concern as he watched everyone emerge. Ehsan and Fatima tried their best to keep the zombies off of Julie and the kids, but two people could only do so much against a herd. Deon intensified his distraction, clapping with all the vigor he could muster and shouting loudly enough for everyone in a mile-wide radius to hear, but many zombies chose to pursue the more immediate meals in front of them. As Ehsan swung at a zombie reaching for Natalia while Fatima did the same for one reaching for Sebastian, another got hold of Lucero and bit her forearm.
Ehsan’s heart stopped. All of his grief and numbness transformed to rage. He raised his shovel and chopped off the arm of the zombie grabbing her. Lucero looked at her bite. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head as she dropped to the ground. Another zombie approached. Ehsan pushed kicked it away, threw his shovel like a javelin at the next nearest zombie’s chest, and picked up Lucero. His arms and back ached, and his feet urged him to slow down, but he kept going. A cluster of six looked to cut him off, but Deon went from distracting to attacking to get their attention.
They cleared the herd, but kept running. Fatima said something to Julie, whose eyes were unfocused. Her mouth hung slightly open and her teeth chattered. Ehsan would’ve felt sorry for her, if he could’ve felt anything. He continued forward with Lucero on his back like a machine, unthinking, unfeeling, focused only on escape.
“God damn it,” Ken grunted, biting his lower lip so hard it bled. His breathing became erratic. Ehsan, Fatima, Deon, Sarah, Ken, and Hector sat around in the downstairs living room of house a few blocks away from the library. Julie had the seven surviving kids in the master bedroom upstairs while Emma took take of Lucero in another upstairs bedroom. Sarah held Mateo’s ax, which she’d recovered when she rescued Ana and Estefanía, staring at it without blinking. She sat with Ehsan and Fatima on a long black pleather couch while Ken sat on a black pleather recliner next to them. Hector brought over a flimsy wooden chair from the kitchen while Deon paced around in front of everyone. Ken saw the old ceramic lamp next to his seat. His eyes narrowed into seething, venomous slits that reminded Ehsan of a snake. He picked up the lamp and shattered it against the ground. “God damn it!”
“We’re so fucking useless,” Ehsan muttered as he buried his face in his hands. He no longer felt numb. All he could think of was Andrew and Lucero.
Andrew, the first kid Ehsan and Fatima met at the school. It was seeing him that convinced Fatima to give the school a try. Since then he’d proven himself to be foolish, and mischievous, and adventurous, and brave. Ehsan couldn’t get the sound of Andrew’s piercing cry out of his head. What had gone through Andrew’s mind in his final moments? Ehsan didn’t even try to push the question from his mind. He didn’t feel like he deserved to. He turned it over in his head, again and again, haunted by the vivid, unknowable level of despair Andrew had to have felt in his final moments.
Now Lucero faced that same fate. Lucero, the girl who always comforted little Andrea, who dreamed of being a rockstar to provide for her friends, who as a child had reached an understanding of what it meant to be part of the human family that some adults wouldn’t reach in a hundred years. Ehsan dug his face deeper into his hands, shaking his head in anguish.
At some point, he heard footsteps from the staircase. He looked over to see Emma walking down.
“How is she?” Hector asked flatly without looking up.
“Curled up on the bed,” Emma answered in a similar tone. “We need to go over some ground rules.”
“What do you mean?” Hector asked. His hands, folded together while his elbows sat on his thighs, trembled.
“Well, even though our clinic had nothing resembling an ICU, we still had parents bring in their dying children every once in a blue moon. Unfortunately, I know enough about the topic to give some guidelines.”
“I guess that’s good,” Sarah commented with a voice stripped entirely of its usual vitality.
“First, we need to accept Lucero’s understanding of the situation. She gets what a zombie bite means. Don’t tell her everything will be okay. She’ll pick up on how disingenuous you’re being and shut you out immediately. Talk to her gently, but don’t ignore the reality of the situation, either.”
Fatima nodded. “My specialty in school was child survivors of trauma, not those with terminal illnesses, but there is still something I can add to what Emma said: we need to be willing to work through Lucero’s thoughts and feelings with her. Even if they make us uncomfortable. If she has something she wants to talk about, then talk about it.”
“That’s right,” Emma agreed. “Other than all that, we just need to be calm. There’s no telling what mood swings she’ll have as she grapples with her… well, y’know, situation. She could start crying, or get explosively angry, or shut us out, or any other number of reactions. We just have to be there for her until, well…”
Ehsan, Fatima, Hector, and Ken eventually went upstairs while Deon and Sarah remained downstairs to watch the entrance. Emma took a break from taking care of Lucero to search the house for cigarettes, a vice she informed them she’d given up three years prior at the request of her ex-fiancé. Ehsan led the way up the stained cherry wood steps. The four of them entered the smallest of the three bedrooms on the top floor. The walls, painted pastel green, blue, and pink, had probably once belonged to a kid much younger than Lucero. Lucero lay curled in a ball on the bed with white sheets, its left side facing the door. Lucero watched the doorway, her right arm bandaged up.
“P-please don’t leave me again,” she begged in a soft, quiet voice.
Fatima and Hector rushed over to comfort her.
“I’m so sorry, Lucero. We are right here,” Fatima soothed.
Lucero remained quiet. She turned from her side to her back, tears filling her eyes but not falling.
“Is there anything you wish to talk about?” Fatima asked, gently grabbing Lucero’s left hand and giving it a comforting squeeze.
Lucero took a deep breath and tilted her head toward Fatima. “What happens after you die?”
Fatima froze. She was an atheist who believed nothing divine existed and death meant a return to oblivion, but that was nothing to tell a child on her deathbed. Ehsan, who had no beliefs on what happened after death one way or the other, exchanged glances with her.
“What do you think happens?” Fatima reflected back at her.
“My mom always said we go to heaven, con los angelitos.” She looked at the ceiling, her eyes a million miles away. “I miss my mom. I wonder if she’s there already.”
“I bet she is,” Hector agreed
. “She’s probably been watching you this whole time, smiling.”
“There’s probably a bunch of treehouses up there, too,” Ehsan added. He tried his best at a comforting smile. He had no idea how convincing it was, but he would’ve given anything to know it helped at least a little. “A whole city’s worth. Maybe even a whole country.”
Lucero smiled briefly. A shard of her old personality returned for a fleeting moment. “I’ll have to keep the place ready for when everyone else joins me.”
“You’d probably take better care of it than half the adults here,” Ehsan joked. Lucero smiled once more.
Fatima patted the top of Lucero’s hand, then gave it another squeeze. “Is there anything you want us to get you?”
Lucero shook her head. “Just please don’t leave me alone again.”
“At least one of us will be here the whole time. I promise.”
“Th-thanks.” Lucero shut her eyes and scrunched her face. The dam broke; she could no longer keep her composure or contain her tears. She went from letting Fatima grip her hand to clinging to Fatima’s arm. She looked up at Fatima, her face a contorted, tear-stained mess, with a lonely grief in her eyes that cracked Ehsan’s heart down the center. “Why me, Miss Fatima?”
Fatima leaned over and embraced Lucero, reciprocating her tears. “It was nothing you did, Lucero. I wish it was me instead. I’m so, so sorry. We are here for anything you need.”
Lucero cried in Fatima’s arms while everyone else stood around. Ehsan wished Marcus had survived. He could’ve saved Lucero with his bite kit. Or Ryan could’ve saved her by preventing the zombies from getting to her in the first place. Or Josue, or Manuel. Mateo and Cecilia would’ve never let this happen. Every death weighed on Ehsan, the ripples of which poisoned Lucero that very moment. All of the survivors in that house had failed those who gave everything for the future of the group. He hung his head in shame.
Ken, who hadn’t said a word up to that point, stormed from the room. Ehsan looked to Fatima, who nodded. Ehsan left the room and closed the door behind him as he heard Ken go down the stairs. Ehsan raced down after him. Ken went right for the door.
“You good, Ken?” Deon asked, walking over to check on him. Sarah set down Mateo’s ax with visible reluctance and got up to follow him.
“I can’t take this anymore,” Ken declared as he stood by the door, his hand on the knob.
“The fuck you talking about?” Deon asked.
Ken turned around, his eyes venomous. “I can’t take this anymore. We let a fucking kid die, and we got another dying upstairs. Mateo is dead, Cecilia is dead, my whole team died yesterday. I’m done.”
“You’re our strongest member, Ken,” Ehsan said. “You leave us and you’re dooming the rest of these kids to their deaths.”
“Yeah, my strength has really helped so far! Almost everyone I care about or respect is dead. What the hell does it matter if I’m here or not?”
“There’s still hope if we stick together,” Sarah protested. “We’ll figure something out, we always do. But we need everyone, especially after losing so many.”
“Maybe,” Ken admitted. “Sure, if we all stayed in a group, some of us might survive. But I can’t take that chance anymore. I’m sorry, but I just can’t watch another kid die.”
Deon scoffed and glared at Ken. “Strongest person my ass, Ehsan. He’d rather get caught in his feelings and leave than protect these kids.”
“Whatever,” Ken replied. He returned his attention to the door.
A sudden rage consumed Ehsan. He shoved Ken away from the door. Ken stumbled a few feet before regaining his balance and getting in Ehsan’s face. He raised his fist to hit him, but Ehsan didn’t back down. Ehsan didn’t care what happened to himself. After every sacrifice made by Mateo, by Cecilia, by Manuel, by Josue, by Ryan, even by Andrew, he couldn’t accept someone fleeing and throwing it all away. He looked into Ken’s eyes without flinching.
“I’d run through you in a second,” Ken pointed out.
“Probably,” Ehsan conceded without moving. Deon and Sarah joined him. The three stood shoulder to shoulder, blocking the doorway.
“You can’t just keep me here against my will,” Ken muttered, breaking eye contact.
Ehsan, who had no idea what his end goal was, stood his ground. “Guess not. But you at least gotta go through me.”
“Forget it Ehsan, he ain’t shit,” Deon declared. “You wanna go, Ken? Fine. But you gotta be the one to take out Lucero when she turns. You do that or I ain’t letting you go.”
“I don’t-”
“Fucking spare us,” Sarah interjected. “Mateo and I had a future together. We all cared about him, but I loved him. You think his death, and Andrew’s death, and everyone else’s deaths haven’t devastated me? I’d love to just go off on my own and not worry about anyone else, but that’s not how this works.”
“I know you could knock us all out and be gone in less than a minute,” Ehsan admitted. “But you’re better than that, Ken. You’re scared, and I get it. I’ve been scared non-stop for the last few days. But we gotta keep pushing through the fear. It’s the only way we make it out of this.”
Ken remained silent. He looked over Ehsan, Deon, and Sarah. He sighed and turned away from the three of them and the door. “I’ll think about it. I promise I’ll be the one to take out Lucero if I leave.”
Hours went by as the group stewed in dread awaiting Lucero’s fate. The morning left as the afternoon sun made its way in small slivers through the living room’s closed blinds. After finding matches but no cigarettes, Emma went to check on Lucero and informed the group she only had about five or six hours left, possibly less. Everyone took turns keeping Lucero company in her room as sweat drenched her body and her breathing grew shallow. Everyone else waited downstairs or watched the other kids. During Ehsan and Fatima’s turn to watch them, Ana and Estefanía asked about Lucero. They exchanged glances before Fatima told them Lucero was sick. They then asked about Mateo.
“Mister Mateo is…” Fatima paused, her face tense as she struggled to figure out how to explain Mateo’s fate.
“Nooooo,” Ana moaned, able to pick up on what Fatima’s pause meant. Estefanía looked to Ana and realized, too. Both started wailing.
“I’m so sorry, girls,” Fatima said. She tried to sooth them, but they couldn’t stop crying no matter what she tried. Estefanía picked up a picture frame of the family that’d lived in the house before the fall and threw it across the room.
The girls continued like this, wailing and sobbing until they grew tired. When they no longer had the energy to grieve, Fatima gave them each water and encouraged them to take a nap.
“I’m sad about Mateo too, girls,” Fatima informed them. “But he did it for us. Please rest. Mateo would want all of you to be okay more than anything else.”
“Okay,” Ana mumbled as she and Estefanía settled into their makeshift beds, their eyes swollen and still misty. Fatima tucked them in, as well as the still-despondent Gustavo and Natalia, before she and Ehsan left the room.
“They need time,” Fatima said as they went downstairs.
“I wouldn’t mind a little more time, myself,” Ehsan replied.
Soon Julie walked down the stairs from Lucero’s room. “I… I think that was…” Tears formed in her eyes. “I think that was it. She hasn’t died yet, but I don’t think she’ll ever, well… wake up again. At least, not as a, well...”
“Yeah,” Ehsan said with a nod. Every adult sat downstairs except for Emma, who’d joined the other children. “Thanks for being there for her at the end.”
Julie shook her head as a tear trickled down her cheek. “I’m sorry I can’t do anything useful. God, my mom was right about me. I’m so sorry, everyone. If I knew how to fight, I could’ve-”
“How long do you think Lucero has?” Ken interjected. Julie responded by looking at the ground. It told Ken all he needed to know. “I’ll head upstairs and wait, then.”
A shr
oud of strained silence fell upon the group as Ken marched up the stairs.
The house remained quiet further into the afternoon. After everyone forced down a small lunch of emergency rations left in the house’s pantry, Julie and Sarah went to take Emma’s place with the kids upstairs. Just as Ehsan finished forcing down a bag of almonds and canned peaches, Ken came down the stairs.
“This is torture,” Ken lamented. He shook his head. “I don’t want her to turn, but I can’t stand seeing her in so much pain.”
“Well, it’s what you’re condemning the other kids to,” Sarah shot back. “Might as well see what you’re doing for them.”
“I’ll go with her,” Ehsan offered before Ken could reply. He agreed with Sarah, but his biggest priority was making sure Lucero didn’t wake up without anyone at her side. “I’ll let you know when she, well... when it happens.”
“I’ll come, too,” Fatima decided.
Ehsan grabbed a water bottle he’d retrieved from the pantry and the two of them went to Lucero’s room. She tossed and turned, the normally rich brown color drained from her face. Sweat soaked every bit of her body and clothes. Ehsan had to turn away at the sight of her for a moment before approaching, like dipping one’s toes in frigid water and pulling them out before plunging in. Fatima went to sit on the edge of the bed while Ehsan moved the rocking chair from the corner of the room to right next to Lucero. Fatima grabbed Lucero’s left hand and caressed it.
“Her hands are clammy.” Fatima’s grip seemed to calm her down.
Ehsan’s throat tightened and his eyes stung. He took Hector seriously the other day when he said she’d be leader someday. He leaned forward and awkwardly put his hand on her forearm, wanting to do whatever he could do help comfort her. “I get what Ken meant. I don’t want her to turn, but man, this is hard.”
“You want to talk about it?”
Ehsan sighed. “I don’t wanna distract the focus from Lucero, but I will say this is tough. She’s such a great kid- err, was, I guess. I mean, she still is, but…” Ehsan’s eyes watered. He wanted to hide his tears and pretend it didn’t get to him as much as it did, but his sister knew him too well. “I just… hate this. I really, really hate it. I can’t believe we lost Andrew. Now we’re losing Lucero, too? It’s just… a lot.”
The Human Spring Page 32