by Chloe Walsh
Off the Cards
Faking it #2
Published by Chloe Walsh
Copyright 2017 by Chloe Walsh
All rights reserved. ©
The right of Chloe Walsh to be identified as the Author of the work has been asserted by her in accordance with the Copyright and Related Rights Act 2000.
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Off the Cards,
First published, February 2017
All rights reserved. ©
Cover photo licensed from Shutterstock Inc.
Edited by Aleesha Davis
Disclaimer
This book is a work of fiction. All names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.
The author acknowledges all songs titles, song lyrics, film titles, film characters, trademarked statuses, brands, mentioned in this book are the property of, and belong to, their respective owners. The publication/ use of these trademarks is not authorized/ associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.
Chloe Walsh is in no way affiliated with any of the brands, songs, musicians or artists mentioned in this book.
All rights reserved ©
Table of Contents
Copyright
Disclaimer
Table of Contents
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Playlist for Off the Cards
Acknowledgements
Other books by Chloe Walsh
Upcoming titles
About the author
Dedication
This book is for my Clovers.
I love you all and couldn’t do this without you guys.
Clo xx
Chapter One
Andi
"WHAT NATHAN FORGOT TO TELL YOU was that while I was screwing your Daddy, he was busy giving it to your momma."
"Liar," I hissed, feeling a massive weight off my shoulders. "There's no way in hell Nathan would ever do that. Right, Nate?"
I turned to look at Nathan and my heart sank in my chest.
He was looking at me with the guiltiest expression I'd ever seen.
"Andi…"
"Right, Nate?" I repeated, feeling tears pool in my eyes. "You wouldn’t do that to Jackson or… me?"
"Andi," Nate whispered, eyes locked on my face. "I am so fucking sorry."
"Get out," I whispered. "Get the hell away from me."
Five words was all it took.
Five simple words, that when formed together and coming from Nathan's mouth, caused my world to fall out from beneath my feet…
"YOU HAD TO DO IT, DIDN’T YOU?" Nate snarled, eyes locked on Dallas. "You fucking had to ruin this for me."
Dallas shrugged nonchalantly. "I told you; if I'm going down, you're coming with me."
"You both need to leave," I choked out. My body was shaking. My heart was cracking clean open. "You need to go now."
"You had to know that she would find out sooner or later," Dallas added, ignoring my request. She smiled coyly. "I did you a favor here."
"A favor?" The skin around Nate's mouth had turned white. I'd never seen him look so enraged. "You're a twisted, spiteful bitch, Dallas." He shook his head and gaped at her. "Everything I've done for you, and you throw me under the bus like this?"
Dallas's brave façade faltered then. "Come on, Nate." Regret churned in her eyes. "You weren't really serious about her."
"I confided in you and you threw it back in my face," he hissed.
"Nate…" Dallas made to move towards him, but he held his hand up, warning her off. "I'm…sorry."
"I want you both to get out of my room!" I screamed, unable to stand another second of this crap.
"I'm not going anywhere, Andi," Nate shot back. His face was a mixture of pain and relief as he spoke. "Not until you know the truth."
His expression confused me. He looked almost relieved that I knew, which made it so much worse.
"What's the truth, Nate?" I heard myself scream. I was crying now – hard, ugly crying. I felt dirty and violated and broken. "You didn’t sleep with my momma?" I wanted him to tell me it wasn’t true – that Dallas was making all of this up.
But one look at his face and I knew that he couldn’t do that.
He was hiding something from me.
He'd been hiding something from me all along.
It was why he'd pushed me away – why he'd blown hot and cold so much.
Now I knew why.
Now I knew what that something was.
My mother.
Feeling sick to my stomach, I clutched the covers; pulling them tighter, higher, hoping I could somehow disappear from this moment and never come back.
My teeth were chattering.
Tears were streaming down my cheeks. I couldn’t understand any of this. I had never been so exposed and so vulnerable in my life. And the boy I'd trusted my heart with was telling me the worst imaginable truths.
"Why don’t you get the hell out of here," Nate snarled, turning his anger on Dallas. "Go and spout your poison somewhere else."
Casting one final guilt-ridden glance at Nathan, a despondent looking Dallas slipped out of my room without another word.
"How could you do that?" I sobbed when Dallas closed my bedroom door behind her. "Huh?" Clenching my eyes shut, I forced the image of my mother and my boyfriend from my mind before choking out a harsh sob. "Just go." I didn’t think I could bear to hear the details. I was fairly certain they would push me over the ledge I was barely holding on to.
"I already told you, I'm not going anywhere," he shot back, tone hoarse. Clad in nothing but a pair of worn jeans, Nathan stalked over to my bedroom door and turned the lock. "Not until you calm the fuck down and hear me out."
"I don’t want to hear you out," I shot back angrily. "And I don’t want to calm down. In fact, I don’t want to even look at you right now."
Just a few minutes ago, we'd been having sex.
Now, we were about to draw our guns.
The atmosphere crackled with intensity.
"Well, tough fucking luck, sweetheart, because I'm not leaving." He paced my room almost frantically, like he was trying to piece together a plausible excuse. "Just give me a minute to think." Running a hand through his hair, he muttered a string of curse words, still pacing. "Fucking bitch," he snarled. "Can't stand to see me happy."
"What are you doing?" I demanded, appalled at his reaction. I watched in horror as he slapped his head with the
palms of his hands. "Nate! Stop it."
"What I said to Jackson," Nathan finally settled on saying as he stalked towards me. "I meant it." He ran a hand roughly through his mussed black hair and exhaled a harsh breath. "I love you."
"No." Shaking my head, I held my hand up, urging him to stay back. I knew I wasn’t strong when it came to confrontation, and I was even weaker when it came to Nate. If he touched me again, I couldn’t promise myself that I would push him away. On the contrary, I was fairly certain I would cave and crumble. "No, you don’t." Nathan Cole was playing me. He'd been playing me all this time and I'd been too stupid and too blind to see it.
But I saw it now.
"You don’t love me," I hissed, bleary eyed and sniffling. "You don’t know the meaning of the word."
"I don’t know the meaning of the word?" Nate deadpanned.
"Exactly," I shot back, feeling both furious and depleted. "So get the hell away from me."
"You think I don’t love you?" Nate repeated angrily, daring me to agree with him. "You're so fucking clueless, Andi."
"Stop insulting me," I bit out.
"Then stop fucking lying to yourself!" he roared. "Let's take a little walk down memory lane here, girl. I was the one who brought you fishing for the first time when Jackson wouldn't let you go. I baited your hook every damn time that day. I kicked Jack DeLuca's ass in the third grade for picking on you in the school yard, and I was the mother fucking one who pushed your pink fucking Barbie bicycle the whole way back from the ballpark when you twisted your ankle – with you on my back. Me, Andi." He slammed his fist against his chest. "Fucking me." Looking furious, he ran a hand through his black hair and stalked towards me. "So don't fucking say I don't love you when loving you is all I've done my whole damn life."
"Please don’t make this worse." He had tried to warn me. He'd told me he was bad for me. He'd tried to push me away and I wouldn’t go. I'd gone back for more over and over again. No wonder I was embarrassed. I had behaved like a desperate little slut.
If my father found out about this, I would be sent away. I knew that was true. He didn’t have much love for me, and if he knew I had dirtied his name, he wouldn’t think twice about shipping me off to that boarding school he always spoke about.
"I'm telling you the goddamn truth here!" Nate bellowed. "I fucking love you, Andi Davis. I've been loving you since I was six years old." His voice cracked as he spoke. "I've worshipped the goddamn ground you've walked on since the first fucking grade."
"If that's the truth then why did you do this to me?" I shot back brokenly. "Why did you sleep with my mother?" I groaned and twisted in physical pain. "My momma, Nate! How could you do that?"
"You automatically assume that Dallas is telling you the truth," Nate shot back. "Dallas fucking Holloway of all people."
"Then tell me she's lying," I cried out hoarsely – I freaking begged. "I want more than anything else in the world for you to tell me she's lying!" When he didn’t reply, I cracked. "You can't, can you?" I sobbed. "Because it's true, isn’t it?"
"No," he replied flatly. "I can't. But you don’t know my reasons…"
"Did you fuck her while you were with me?" I demanded, delirious with jealousy and pain.
"Are you for real?" he spat.
"Answer me!"
"No, Andi. Christ." He ran a hand through his mussed hair and groaned. "I wouldn’t do that to you. Everything I have ever done has been for you or for my family," he added, visibly shaking. "I didn’t have a choice in any of this shit, Andi. I still don’t."
"So you're saying she forced you?" I countered, not taking his response as a valid reason. "Are you suggesting my momma raped you?" I looked him up and down in blatant disbelief. "Are you kidding me?"
"I'm not saying she raped me," he snarled. "I'm not saying anything of the goddamn sort. I'm saying I didn’t have a choice, Andi." Letting out a heavy sigh, Nate took a step closer and I balked. "There is so much you don’t know, baby," he whispered brokenly. "If you knew the half of it – how deep this bullshit goes, then you'd…"
"Are you involved in prostitution?" I demanded, unable to hear a coherent word. "Are you so badly stuck for money that you fucked my momma for cash? Is that it?" Please be that. I could handle that a heck of a lot better than knowing that he slept with her because he wanted her…
"Are you fucking serious right now?" Nathan looked like I had slapped him. "I can't believe you just asked me that."
"Answer me!"
"No, Andi," he deadpanned. "I do not, nor have I ever prostituted my body for money." He glared at me in disgust. "I give it to you free of fucking charge." He grabbed his crotch. "All nine inches."
"Don’t make fun of me," I snapped, blushing.
"Then don’t fucking insult me," he snarled. "Calling me a fucking hooker?" Nate laughed humorlessly. "You know me."
"I thought I did," I shot back, trembling. "But you're a stranger to me now."
"A stranger?" Nate asked in disbelief. "Are you for real?"
"Leave," I sobbed, unable to continue this for another second. "You're not welcome in this house anymore. I want you off my property."
"Don’t talk to me like I'm the hired fucking help, Andi," Nathan warned. "Christ, what the hell have I been doing here these past twelve years?" he snarled, running a hand through his hair. "Planting fucking flowers?" He shook his head, clearly agitated. "I've been here, Andi. Right here. In this house. Around your fucked up family. I stuck it out for Jackson. I stayed for you!" His voice broke off and he pinched the bridge of his nose. "You are the last person I would hurt. The very fucking last. I've gone out of my way to keep you safe. Your shit bag parents don't care – never fucking have. Your brother's too busy ramming his dick up every pussy in Springhill to notice you. I've been here. Me. Watching over you. Keeping you safe."
"You. Slept. With. My. Mother."
"You. Don’t. Know. The. Whole. Story," he shot back, equally furious. "I'm more than willing to tell you everything if you're willing to hear me out." He waved his hands in the air almost helplessly. "I'm so fucking sorry that you found out like this, but I honest to god didn’t have a choice –"
"Don’t try to excuse what you've done, Nathan! I don’t need to know the whole story!" I screamed, appalled and delirious. "You didn’t do it for money and she didn’t force you. You had a choice. That's all I need to know." Reaching behind my back, I grabbed my pillow and tossed it at him. "You fucked my momma, Nate!"
Catching the pillow mid-air, he tossed it on the ground and picked up his shirt. "So you've said." Shrugging it on, he slipped his feet into his boots and grabbed his wallet and keys that had landed on my bedroom floor. "You know what, Andi? Sometimes when a choice is between something bad and something much fucking worse, then there's no real choice at all."
"What does that mean?" My heart felt broken, my mind was furious, but my body was still craving his touch. But knowing he'd been inside both me and my mom made me feel violently sick.
"Doesn’t matter." Nathan glowered at me. "You've obviously made your mind up about me. I'm a deadbeat slut, who goes around fucking my friends' mommas."
"I didn’t say that."
"Yeah you fucking did," he shot back. "And what's worse is your eyes are telling me that right now, too. So better get your checkbook out, sweetheart, because you owe me double time for tonight." His voice was layered with sarcasm and pain. It almost sounded as if I'd hurt him. "Or you can add tonight to your momma's tab," he spat. "Might as well make some cash since I'm apparently fucking both of you now."
"You jerk!" Shoving the covers off myself, I jumped off my bed and made a beeline for my ensuite bathroom. Yanking the bathroom door open, I staggered inside before shutting the door and flicking the lock. Locked away in my bathroom, I rushed over to the toilet bowl and dropped to my knees, feeling broken and violated.
Vomiting loudly, I wrapped my arms around the porcelain and buried my head in the bowl, wanting more than anything to erase what I had jus
t learned from my memory. It was disgusting and gross and I couldn't handle it.
He'd slept with my mother.
The boy I'd spent my life adoring had sex with my mom.
Nathan and my mom…
Ugh. Crying out hoarsely, I heaved again as shame and mortification enveloped my already battered heart.
"Andi." Nathan pounded his fist against my bathroom door. "Let me in."
"Go away!" I screamed between heaves. "Leave me alone!" I loved him. Knowing what he had done physically repulsed me, but it didn’t change my feelings. I wished it could. But apparently the heart didn’t work that way. I was feeling jealous and that jealousy repulsed me even more.
Jealous of my own mother…
"I'm not leaving you like this." Nathan's voice was tormenting me, making everything so much worse. "Let me in, Andi. Come on, baby."
"Don’t. Call. Me. That." My words were harsh and angry and full of bitterness. They represented my heart. Oh god, Jackson had seen me having sex – worse than having sex; I was being fucked like a freaking dog on all fours.
Everything had gone to hell.
My life.
My relationship with my brother.
My reputation.
Poof! Evaporated into thin air just like that.
One bad decision had erased seventeen years of good behavior and rule abiding. Everything I had worked so hard for; my perfect grades and good southern manners, my charity work and all of the summers I'd spent volunteering. No one would remember me for any of that now.
No, I would forever be remembered for being the girl who got between Jackson Davis and Nathan Cole. I would always be that girl because, let's face it, there was no coming back from what I had done to their relationship. I'd seen the look in my brother's eyes. Jackson didn’t trust easily, but he gave his all to the ones he did. Once that trust was broken, well… let's just say, I wasn’t expecting him and Nate to kiss and make up any time soon.
Oh, and I'd also be known as the girl who'd been caught on all fours while the town bad boy took her from behind.