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~~~
Lulu briefly considered going to Tony's house so she could get some writing done. She had to occupy her mind for more than five hours, until her appointment with him--an appointment with her own husband! Her mouth tightened. What a sorry mess they had made of their marriage, and it not yet a week old.
No, she wouldn't go to the house. Nor would she return to Mrs. Graham's, for the woman's chattering would allow her no peace. After a few moments' thought, she went to Burkhart's and purchased a ream of writing paper and a dozen pencils. Thence to the Nevada Hotel, where she obtained permission to use one of the tables in the lobby. With her back to the room, she went to work.
The article all but wrote itself. She wasn't certain where she would submit it, because it was bound to be controversial. Probably one of the journals that supported suffrage, although most of them paid very little, especially for opinion pieces. By the time the watch pinned to her breast told her it was time to return to Tony's office, she had written fifteen pages of argument for and against a married woman's retaining her maiden name.
She had convinced herself of neither alternative.
After stacking the closely-written pages in order, she gathered the discarded sheets into a second stack. It was her habit to make notes to herself on the unused backs, a habit learned when she had lived on a shoestring in the early days after college. She felt good about the article, and had no doubt it would speak to many women facing the same dilemma.
The clock behind Mr. Eagleton's empty desk was just striking four when she opened the door. Would Tony see her promptness as eagerness? Was she undermining her own case by arriving on the dot of four? Does it matter? We must settle our differences once and for all, or live in misery the rest of our lives.
One point she had made in her article was that a man and woman bound in matrimony were morally and ethically obligated to work toward common goals, an obligation transcending the mere social convention that said a wife took her husband's name. In developing her thesis, she had realized both she and Tony had given both pride and ambition far too much power over their relationship. The issue before them was not who was right and who was wrong, who was to blame for their situation, or how marriage would affect her dedication to the cause of suffrage. They had made a contract to work toward a common goal, and must now live up to its terms.
"Tony?" she called, when no one came forth. "Are you here?"
"In my office," he called.
She started toward the hall entrance, then turned back. Although there was no key in the lock of the entry door, there was one hanging on a nail just beside the door. She used it, determined they would have their discussion without interruption.
The telephone on the wall caught her eye. Bother! I suppose there is no way to turn that contraption off. She'd just have to hope no one rang the office while she was here.
Tony was at his drafting table, sleeves rolled up, an eyeshade casting the upper half of his face into shadow. "You're prompt," was all he said.
She set the box of papers on the corner of his small, cluttered desk. "We have much to discuss," she replied, as she removed her coat and hat. "May I sit?"
There were two chairs in the room, a scarred one looking as if it had been discarded from someone's kitchen, and a nearly-new swivel chair with a leather padded seat. She took the latter at his rather grudging gesture.
"Your furniture was delivered this afternoon," he said, not looking directly at her. "How much did it cost?"
"Oh, dear, I forgot all about it. I am sorry." Feeling at a disadvantage now, she said, "You did say I could..."
"We needed furniture. I just hope you didn't spend more than I could afford. I couldn't read the total on the bill, and I haven't had time to get over to pay it."
"I was quite frugal, I assure you. The total was a bit more than I had set as my limit because I decided to get a wardrobe large enough to hold all of our clothing. There's no sense in having two--"
"Lulu, how much did you spend?"
"One hundred seventy-three dollars and fifty cents," she said, and waited for the explosion. She really hadn't needed to buy those pictures. Or she could have purchased them from her own funds.
"We can afford that. How much did you say you'd pay Mr. Lee and his son?"
"Five dollars a week. Each. But--"
"I'll take care of them, too. But if you want a maid, you'll have to pay her." He shrugged, still not meeting her eyes. "Unless she can help with the baby."
"I have no idea if Xi Xin knows anything at all about infants," Lulu admitted. "I suppose I will need help then. At least for a few weeks." She fidgeted with the fringe on her jacket, vastly uncomfortable. "Tony, I shouldn't have hired the Lees without discussing it with you. I realize that now."
At last he turned to face her. "And I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. You caught me by surprise. And you hit me where it hurt."
Lulu waited, while he obviously sought the right words.
"I've managed to avoid taking sides on this anti-Chinese movement so far, and had hoped to go on doing so," he said slowly. "I felt I owed it to Eagleton, to stay on until he gets the telephone business running smoothly. He gave me a chance, when I thought I'd never work as an engineer again."
"An engineer? I would have described your job as handyman, from what I've seen."
"That too," he said, with a hint of smile in his tone. "I admit I've had to turn my hand to all sorts of work since I came here. But the point is, he let me prove I wasn't a failure, wasn't incompetent. When I went to the conference in Denver, everyone accepted me as one of them. They didn't care about what I'd done before. It was what I've done here that mattered. I'll be able to find work pretty much anywhere there are telephones. Which means anywhere at all, Lulu." He smiled widely. "Telephones are the future, Lulu, and I've got a piece of it."
"That's wonderful, Tony," she told him, forcing herself to sound enthusiastic. "I'm happy for you." How ironic, she thought, that his future was bright with promise again, while hers had just gone into limbo.
"The future is what I came here to discuss with you," she said after a moment's pause to remind herself of her decision. "Our future."
He sobered instantly. "Yes, we can't go on the way we've been, can we? We...I rushed into this without thinking. I'm sorry, Lulu. I should have given you the option of saying no. We could have worked something out."
"You were right to insist we marry. No child should have to live with the handicap of bastardy." Her hands went to her belly. "I want this child to have the very best life she can, without giving her a start she might never overcome. I will do whatever it takes to ensure her wellbeing."
He looked at her long and hard. "That's a different tune than you were singing a few days ago. What changed your mind?"
"I felt her move. Before that she had been an... an abstract concept. An inconvenience, not a person. But when I realized she was alive within me, she became real." Just then she felt the now-familiar stirring. "Here. She's moving now. Feel." She took his hand and guided it into place. "There. Can you feel her?"
"No, I...Great God! I did. I felt him move!" He knelt before her and spread both his hands across her belly. A look of wonderment came across his face.
For as long as the babe moved, they sat in silence, both caught up in the marvel of the life they had created together. When the tiny movements finally ceased, neither stirred for a moment. Then he raised his head and smiled at her. "This sort of makes everything else seem unimportant, doesn't it?"
"Everything but making sure she is born into a house filled with love and mutual respect," Lulu agreed. "I'll try if you will." They had created a
new life together, and in doing so, had, unaware at the time, taken a step into an unknown future. What it held was up to them. She knew with a terrifying certainty that the decisions they made now, this afternoon, would form the basis for the rest of their lives.
"Oh, God, Lulu. Yes!" He gathered her into his arms, pulling her to her knees. Gently, carefully, he lifted her hand, pressed his lips into her palm. "I love you so much," he said hoarsely, his words muffled by her hand.
A yearning so strong it weakened her made Lulu collapse against him. He caught her in his strong arms and held her close. His mouth was against her ear and he spoke soft words of longing, of love. Of desire, hot and urgent.
Yet Tony hesitated, not willing to force her again into withdrawal. "Be sure, Lulu. Because if I don't stop now, I won't be able to."
She was soft in his arms. Pliant and willing. "I am sure, Tony. As sure as I can be."
Perhaps it was because he had loved her so long, knew her so well, that all sense of urgency was gone. They had all night.
No, they had forever.
Tony held her close, burying his face in her hair, her wondrous, curly hair that always smelled faintly of some exotic flower. "I don't want to take you here, on the floor," He whispered. "I can wait."
Her arms tightened around him. "Now, Tony. I don't want to wait." She slid from his arms until she lay on the floor. When she reached for him, he went to her, gladly, only hesitating when his bare hand felt how cold the hard wood was.
"There's a cot..."
"The floor's not so hard..."
"Are you cold?"
"Not with you for a blanket."
"I've never stopped loving you."
"I tried to put you out of my mind, but no one else seemed as right."
"That feels good. Do it again."
"Like this?"
"Great God, yes."
They learned each other's bodies in a way they had not before, tasted new flavors, sampled new sensations. When at last they joined, it was as if for the first time. The desperate urgency that had marked their first coming together was transmuted into a smoldering hunger he knew could never be entirely satisfied, only eased for a while, until it was reborn. Her small gasp, as she neared completion, pushed him closer to his own edge. He drove into her, burying himself in her incredible honeyed heat, feeling her spasms until his own carried him beyond now into a place where they could only cling together in satiated exhaustion.
Her skirts hiked to her waist and spread around her, his britches tangled about his ankles, they lay entwined, only peripherally aware of the draft across the floor, of the flickering lamp.
Until the telephone rang.
"Don't," she said, clinging to him.
"I must." He rolled away and rose clumsily to his feet. "Don't you dare laugh," he warned her fiercely as he pulled up his britches.
"Of course not," she said, not quite stifling her giggle.
The phone had stopped ringing by the time Tony reached Eagleton's office. He turned the crank and when Jack answered, he said, "I was in back. What's up?"
"Maybe it's nothing, Mr. Dewitt, but I thought you'd want to know, given all that's been happening."
"What is it?"
"A rock, that's what. With a note tied 'round it. It come through the window. I stuffed rags into the hole, but I don't reckon they'll do much good. It's getting real cold outside."
"Jack, what does the note say?"
"Oh, that. Here I'll read it to you."
Tony winced at the clank when Jack dropped the earpiece.
His footsteps faded, then grew louder. "Are you there, Mr. Dewitt?"
"I'm here," Tony said, holding on to his patience. From the corner of his eye, he saw Lulu at the door. Her hair was standing out in fat corkscrews all over her head, but her garments were tidy. She was digging in her reticule for something.
"It says, 'Those who traffic with the heathen will be destroyed.' That's all. But there's some kind of funny words at the end." He recited them, stumbling over unfamiliar syllables.
They made no sense to Tony. "Spell it, will you?" He leaned over the desk and wrote the letters in large capitals.
Lulu came closer and looked over his shoulder. When he was in the middle of the last word, she gasped.
He finished writing. "Okay, Jack. I'll ask around and see what I can find out. In the meantime, get some boards to put over the window for tonight. We'll do something permanent about it tomorrow morning."
"Sure, Mr. Dewitt. I'll take care of it soon as Eph gets here." He disconnected.
Tony handed the paper to Lulu. "Does this mean anything to you?"
She looked at it a moment, then crumpled it in her hand. "Yes. Yes it does." Her face had gone pale. "Oh, Tony, what have I done?"
"You? Nothing. Somebody's got something against Eagleton, that's all. They smashed a window at the exchange. This was on the paper wrapped around the rock. The note said something about trafficking with heathens. A lot of hot air, if you ask me."
"No, you don't understand. Quod Semper. Quod Ubique. Quod Omnibus. That's the motto of the Ku Klux Klan. Oh, God, they're here, too." Again she crumpled the paper. "And I brought them down on you, with my good intentions."
He took her into his arms, felt her tremble against him. "Lulu, I'll give you odds this isn't from the Klan. There's somebody in town who has a grudge against Eagleton. He's behind this, just as he's been behind all the other vandalism we've suffered."
"You're wrong." Her head moved against his shoulder. "You're wrong. Ru Nan took me to Mrs. Graham's last night, then returned the buggy to the livery stable. I gave him a note that said he worked for me, that he was authorized to pick the buggy up when I needed it. So people know I hired him."
Tony glanced at the clock. Nearly six. "Let's go home."
"But--"
"I know. We haven't settled anything yet. Let's go home. We can leave word for Mr. Lee and Ru Nan to take care of Eagleton's stock, and not worry about us."
"The house will be cold."
He ushered her out the door. "So we'll bundle. I want you all to myself tonight." Aside from the fact that whenever they discussed anything, sparks were apt to fly, he wanted her again. This time they'd be in his bed, where he would live out some of the fantasies he had concocted through the long years they had been apart.
Fantasies in which she had always been the central player.
* * * *
The house was cold. Lulu kept her coat on while she built a fire in the kitchen range. The gravy left from the night before last was an unappetizing, congealed mass in its kettle in the cold box. She sniffed, but it was frozen and gave off no odor. She would make biscuits again to go with the eggs she'd purchased. They would have to spread them with bacon fat, for both she and Mr. Lee had forgotten to purchase butter. I wonder if the grocer carries that ketchup I like so well. I'll have to ask him. It would certainly taste good with the eggs. She wondered if Tony had tried it.
"Remind me tomorrow to order some hay," Tony said, as he came in from the barn. "Grain, too."
"I meant to do that today and forgot. We should start a list." Giving the gravy one last stir, she replaced the lid and slid the kettle a little closer to the hot ring. "There should be paper and pencils--oh, shoot, I forgot my article!"
"Your article?" Tony had seated himself on one of the new kitchen chairs and was unlacing his boots. "Something you're reading?"
Lulu stared at him, then shook her head. "We really don't know much about one another, do we? I thought you were little better than a handyman or a mechanic. You have no idea how I've supported myself for six years. It really is time we talked."
He set his boots in the corner and rose. "We will. First, though, I want to see all this furniture we bought. Have you been in the parlor?"
One hand went to her mouth. "Oh! I forgot that, too. Yes, let's see if it looks as good here as it did in the store." Despite herself, she was excited about the prospect of fixing up their house. "Wait. Let me
bring this lamp, so you won't trip over something."
The furniture had been set around the perimeter of the room. The sofa, one chair and a small table stood against the wall to her left, the glass-front bookcase was behind the shabby armchair, and the other chair and footstool were across from the sofa. The round drum table sat exactly in the middle of the room, just as it had in the picture Lulu had seen. "Oh, my. It's so...so ornate." The carving across the back and on the legs now looked far more intricate than when she'd seen it in the store.
"I like it," Tony told her, as he ran a hand over the fabric on the larger chair. He sat, wiggled around a bit, leaned back. "Comfortable too. Did you get lamps?" He stretched his legs out in front of him. "Ummm, yes. I do like this."
"I'll see about the lamps," she said. She opened the bedroom door, held the lamp high. "Oh, no!"
Tony came to his feet immediately. "What?"
"It's too big. There's hardly room for the bed." The wardrobe she'd chosen sat against the wall opposite the bed, next to the old one. The scarred dresser and their new bureau sat on either side of the door. There was scarcely two feet to walk between the furniture and the bed.
Tony stood behind her. "We'll manage. The old pieces can go into the spare room. But not tonight." His arm went around her middle and he pulled her back against him. "We've other things to do tonight."
Lulu had a feeling he meant something other than discussing their future. For some reason, the idea appealed to her. Relaxing against him for a moment, she found herself wishing she could be spontaneous, as Katie had been when she'd fallen in love with Luke. "I wanted him," Katie had said, "and knew in my heart I always would. I didn't worry about anything else."
But Lulu was not Katie. She needed to know the shape of the future insofar as she could. She pulled away, with not a little regret. "There are the lamps," she said, pointing to the top of the wardrobe. "Can you get them down?"
By the time they'd filled the lamps and rearranged the parlor furniture, the oven was hot and the gravy was simmering. Lulu moved it off the hot ring and replaced it with the skillet, then she put the biscuits in to bake. A quick glance at the clock told her it was already well past seven. The evening was passing much too quickly. "What time must you leave in the morning?" she asked him, when he came in with an armload of wood.
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