She hated bringing up old memories. “Aren’t we full of questions this morning?”
He shrugged. “Hey, my life has been an open book. Just getting to know you, too.”
“Okay, here it is. I met Jared when he brought his friend into the emergency room where I worked. He was dressed in his Marine Corps uniform and he charmed the socks off me, and a lot more. I was barely twenty-three when we got married. He was a career soldier and was shipped overseas right after our honeymoon. Over the years, he went back several more times.”
She felt the tears filling her eyes, and emotions clogged her throat. “On his last tour, he returned home as a disabled vet, and died eighteen months ago. I closed my business, Carlton Care Facility, sold our home and moved here to start over. End of story.”
He flashed a concerned look. “I’m sorry, Erin. I didn’t mean to bring up memories.”
“It’s okay.” She turned the key. “We need to get back for your therapy.” She was angry with herself because she knew it was never a good idea to get personal with a client. She had to keep focused on the one objective, having her new life, her baby. That was why she was doing this.
She glanced at the man across from her. Austin Brannigan wasn’t in any part of her future.
* * *
AFTER HIS THERAPY session later that day, Austin moved around the house quietly so as not to disturb Erin sleeping in the bedroom. He was surprised when she agreed to stay through his second workout, especially after he’d overstepped and asked about her marriage.
He sat down at the table and drank some water, wondering about the man she loved so deeply. What did that kind of love feel like? With his traveling from town to town, he’d never stayed anywhere long enough to get to know a woman. And that was how he liked it. No strings attached. He had more to do, more to achieve on the circuit.
He couldn’t see himself settling down and having a family. Even after all these years, he could still hear his father’s voice in his head, telling him what a disappointment he’d been to him.
Austin felt his chest tighten. What boy didn’t want his father’s approval? Yet nothing he did was good enough for Neal Brannigan. Even when the old man sat here the other day and said how sorry he was for being a bad dad, Austin still had trouble believing him.
Only sheer determination had him leaving home at eighteen and getting involved in riding bulls for a living. He looked down at his injured leg. If he couldn’t get back into the sport, then he’d be a failure, just as his father predicted.
He chuckled. Not that much of a failure. Thanks to his talent for investing, he had enough money to do anything. Whatever the hell that was.
He heard a sudden cry. He stood, grabbed his walker and made his way down the hall, hearing Erin’s distressed voice. He went to the closed door. When she cried out again, he went inside the dimly lit room. In the bed, she was thrashing around and crying out, “No! No! You can’t leave me.”
Austin went to her immediately and sat down on the mattress. He shook her arm. “Erin, wake up. It’s me, Austin.”
Her eyes shot open, and she gasped his name. “Austin. Oh, God.” She launched herself into his arms, clinging to him like a lifeline.
“It’s okay. I got you.” His hand cupped the back of her head, trying to soothe her trembling. “Nothing’s going to hurt you.” He meant it. She was safe with him.
He held her for what seemed like an eternity, before she raised her head. She wiped at the tears in her eyes, but kept her head down. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to break down like this.”
“Hey, there’s nothing to be ashamed of. You had a nightmare. Do you want to talk about it?”
She moved away from him. He immediately missed the feel of her body against his, the scent of her hair.
She wrapped her arms around her raised legs. “I don’t know what happened. I haven’t had that dream for so long.”
“Do you remember what it was about?”
She nodded, and a tear slid down her cheek. “Yes. It was the night my husband died.” Her watery gaze met his. “The night he took his life.”
Chapter Six
The shock of Erin’s words hit Austin hard. He wasn’t sure what to do or say. “How can I help?”
She shrugged her shoulders. “What can anyone do? Jared decided that life wasn’t worth the effort, so he overdosed on pills and ended it.”
“I’m sorry” was all he could manage to say.
“No, I’m the one who should be sorry.” Erin swung her legs around and got off the bed. “I don’t usually dump personal business on my clients. It’s not professional.”
He watched her move around the room, the dimming afternoon light leaving shadows against the walls. She grabbed a pair of sweatpants off the chair and slipped them on under her oversize T-shirt. He got a quick glimpse of her legs, and a sudden charge zinged through his body.
“Well, we’ve been practically living together for the past two weeks,” he continued, trying to refocus. “You’ve had your hands all over me. If that isn’t personal, I don’t know what is.”
She glared at him. “Does everything have to be sexual to you?”
He couldn’t help but grin, but mainly to relieve the tension between them. “Well, darlin’, what do you think? I’ve got to live up to my reputation.” He patted his bad leg. “Right now, it’s all I got.”
She raised a hand. “Just stop with the pity talk. There’s more to life than losing a few women fawning over you. I’m sure when you’re back on both legs, there’ll be plenty of females who want to see your...scar.” She stormed out of the room.
That stung. He followed, but she was already in the kitchen before he caught up to her. “That’s not fair. My career takes me all over the country. And as you know, I’m not ready to give that up. And yes, I meet women.”
She balked at his words. “That’s just it. Women get to make all the concessions, and men get to do whatever they want. You breeze into town and make your conquests. Then you’re gone.”
It sounded worse when she said it. “Hold it right there. I don’t bed every woman I meet. Believe me, if I partied as much as you claim I do, or the media, I could have never held on to my world ranking. I spend a lot of time working out to stay in condition. I don’t drink much, and I try to get enough sleep, because I’m hauling a trailer across the country. If I did any celebrating, it was after the events.”
Austin raked a hand through his hair. Why did he care about her opinion, anyway? “Yes, there have been women, and yes, I enjoyed their company, but also their friendships. The one thing I never did was make promises that I couldn’t keep.”
The room was silent as she put on the kettle for tea. She refused to look at him.
“Is that what your husband did? Make you promises he didn’t keep?”
She shot him an intense glare. “It doesn’t seem to matter anymore. Jared is gone, and I’m making a new life.”
Austin saw her sadness and her anger. “What did he promise you, Erin?”
She shook her head. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“I thought we were friends.”
She arched an eyebrow. “You’re my client.”
“And friend. Because if you weren’t, I’d never let you boss me around.”
That brought a trace of a smile to her face.
“Well, you are bossy,” he told her.
“Of course I am. It’s the only way I can get you to work.”
“You might try being sweet and see what it gets you.”
Erin couldn’t handle being congenial with the man. Austin was quickly tearing down her defenses, and she had no safeguard for that. The kettle whistled, and she turned off the flame. She reached for two mugs, inserted the tea bags and poured the water in.
They
sat down and drank in silence until Austin spoke up. “I’m truly sorry about your husband, Erin. I can’t imagine going through something like that.”
She nodded. “I had good friends. Brooke has helped me a lot. Her mother, Coralee, was one of my live-in boarders at Carlton Care Facility. After Brooke found her sister, Laurel, then married Trent, she convinced me to move here, too.”
“I, for one, am glad she did. I can’t imagine going through this without your help.”
“That’s because I put up with your shenanigans.”
He tossed his head back and laughed. Her heart raced seeing the handsome and carefree man. She understood why women were so drawn to him.
He squeezed her hand. “You’re priceless, Erin.”
“That’s only because you insisted on paying me twice the money.”
He sobered, his gaze locked on her. “And you’re worth every penny. I’ve made so much of an improvement since you’ve taken over my therapy. I believe I’m on the road back.” He grinned. “Those drill-sergeant tactics of yours are working.”
His praise meant a lot to her. Darn, this man was coming to mean a lot to her. She glanced at the clock. “We better start our evening session. Are you ready for your workout?”
They both stood and headed for the bedroom. “Oh, I forgot to tell you. Next week you have an appointment with your surgeon in Denver. Do you have someone to take you?”
He looked at her. “Could I convince you to drive me?”
Say no. “I’m not sure about my schedule. Let me get back to you.”
“I’d appreciate it. Thank you.”
They had about made it to the room when there was a knock on the door. Erin looked at Austin. “Do you want me to get it?”
“Sure. You’re faster.”
She went and opened the door to find an older man of about fifty.
He touched the brim of his cowboy hat. “Evening, ma’am. I’m looking for Austin Brannigan. Is he here?”
“May I say who’s calling?”
“I’m Dan Lynch. He knows me from the pro rodeo circuit.”
Erin turned to see that Austin was on his way toward her. He looked past her, saw the man and smiled.
“Hey, Dan. What in the world are you doing here?”
Since Austin seemed okay with the stranger, Erin stepped aside and allowed him in the house.
Dan looked Austin over. “I’m glad to see you’re doing so well. You were in pretty bad shape.”
“Don’t remind me, but thanks to a great surgeon, I’m back on my feet. Almost.” Austin came up next to Erin. “Dan Lynch, this is Erin Carlton. She’s my therapist and helping me get my leg strength back.”
“Nice to meet you, Erin.”
“You, too, Dan.” She sensed the two had some business to talk about. She looked at Austin. “I’ll go and get things ready in the equipment room. Don’t be too long.”
Austin watched Erin leave the room, then turned back to Dan. He wasn’t sure why the man was here, but he was going to find out. “How did you know how to find me?”
“I contacted Jay Bridges. I told him I’d waited long enough and needed to see you in person.”
Why wouldn’t Jay tell him about Dan? “Okay, sit down and talk to me. How is Megan? She’s about ready to graduate from college, right? I tried to call her a few times, but she never returned them.” He thought that was just as well. He didn’t want to have a serious relationship.
Dan lowered his head. “She was diagnosed with leukemia last spring.”
He’d cared about Megan. A lot. “Oh, God.” Dan was a single father, and he’d been bringing his daughter to the rodeos since she was a little kid. She’d grown into a beautiful twenty-four-year-old woman. “ Do you need my help? I have money for a specialist.”
Dan shook his head as he blinked several times. “No, it’s too late. Meg lost the battle last month.”
Austin swallowed. “She died?”
Dan nodded. “I would have gotten ahold of you sooner, but you had the accident. Your manager wasn’t very cooperative, either.” He blew out a breath. “And I had so much to deal with.”
He was in shock. “Damn. I’m so sorry, Dan.” His chest tightened, and suddenly he realized how much he’d cared about her. “Megan was such a sweet person. She didn’t deserve this.”
The older man studied him, then finally said, “I didn’t know you and Megan were...together. When I found out, I can’t say I was happy about it. And I also knew that she’s loved you since she was a kid.” He sighed. “And you always treated her special. I appreciate that.”
Austin was ashamed. He had taken advantage of the situation. “I hope you believe me. I cared about her, too. But I knew that I could never be the man she needed.” He shook his head, trying to hold back his emotions, not believing that she was gone. “What can I do?”
“I honestly didn’t want to come here, but Megan made me promise, so I didn’t have a choice.” He stood. “She left something very precious for you. I’ll be right back.”
Austin laid his head back on the sofa and closed his eyes. Oh, God, not sweet Megan. How could she be gone? She’d probably been the best thing that ever happened in his life. They’d spent so much time talking and sharing things. She understood so much, and she’d cared about him. He hoped she’d known that he cared about her, too. Hearing the door open, he wiped away the tears that had found his cheeks. He sat up and saw Dan holding a baby carrier. He set it down on the coffee table.
Austin’s heart began to drum in his chest.
Dan nodded. “This is your daughter, Lillian Katherine Brannigan.”
* * *
SHELL-SHOCKED, AUSTIN stared at the infant. She was cute, her cheeks were rosy, and her eyes were closed, so he couldn’t tell anything about her, except she couldn’t be his child, could she?
“Dan?”
“I’m only passing on what Megan told me. You’re the father of her baby.”
“Hell, Dan,” he said, but the fight left him. He knew he couldn’t deny it. Not after that weekend they spent together during her spring break. “Why didn’t she contact me?”
The older man pulled an envelope from his pocket. “This is a letter from Megan. She said it will explain everything.” He went outside and brought in two more bags. “There’s food and diapers and clothes.”
Panic surged through him. “You’re leaving her here?”
Dan’s eyes filled. “Hell, you think I want to? She’s my granddaughter, my wife’s namesake. All I have left of my Megan. But I have rodeo contracts to fill over the next few months, and I need the money.” Dan pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and wiped his eyes. “If you’ll allow me, I want to be in Lilly’s life.”
Still dazed, he answered immediately. “Oh, God, of course you can.”
The older man’s gaze narrowed. “Unless you don’t want her, because I’ll take her back home with me in a heartbeat and come up with a way to pay someone to care for her.”
Austin looked at the baby. His baby. A protective feeling came over him. “Of course I want my child.”
Dan straightened. “Megan said you’d step up and not turn your back on your child. She said it was because you knew what that was like to lose a parent.”
Austin’s heart squeezed as he looked down at the tiny bundle. “Of course I wouldn’t turn my back on her. She’s my daughter.” The words sounded strange, as doubt crept into his thoughts. Could he care for this child? Give her what she needed and deserved? Damn, he was going to need help. “She’s a Brannigan, and she’s staying here with me.”
* * *
ERIN WAITED AS long as she could. She checked her watch. She needed to be at work in about two hours. It was time to break up the party. She grabbed her bag and walked out to find the place quiet. Dan Lynch
must have left. As she approached the sofa she found Austin holding something in his arms.
She gasped, seeing the tiny baby tucked against his chest, and her own heart began to pound. “A baby?”
Austin raised his head and nodded. “This is my daughter, Lilly Brannigan.”
Erin’s chest tightened painfully seeing her dream come to life, not for her, but for the playboy bull rider. “So her mother just dropped her off for you?” She couldn’t keep the bitterness out of her voice. Quickly, she raised her hand before he could speak. “Not my business.” She had to get out of there before her heart broke totally. She gripped her bag. “Since it looks like you won’t be doing therapy tonight, I’ll head out.”
She headed for the door, and he called her back. “Please, Erin. You can’t leave me. I can’t walk, let alone care for a baby. I don’t even have a place for her to sleep.”
Erin wasn’t sure what to do. On the verge of tears, she wanted to rip that cute little bundle out of Austin’s arms and do some serious loving on her. “Where is the mother?”
“Megan died a month ago.”
Her heart sank for the child’s loss. “What do you want from me, Austin?” she argued. “I have to go to work in a couple hours.”
“Just help me figure out what to do for tonight.”
Erin hated that she wanted to stay, more than her next breath. She pulled out her phone and made a call. When it was answered, she said, “Brooke, I need a favor.”
“Sure. What is it?”
“Do you have a portable crib or playpen Austin can borrow?”
There was a long hesitation, and then she said, “I do. Can’t wait to know why he needs it.”
“Please, just bring it over ASAP.” She hung up and called the main house, talked to Cullen and Shelby, and asked them to come immediately, too.
Erin then walked to the back bedroom, packed up her things and carried them out. She stopped and said to Austin, “Since you won’t be needing me for therapy tonight, I’ll be leaving.”
“Wait. I need help until my family gets here.”
She was tempted to stay, but once again, she couldn’t let a man control her destiny. What did he want, for her to be the child’s stand-in mother? At that moment, she wasn’t sure what she should do. “They’ll be here in ten minutes. I’ve got to go, Austin.”
A Colorado Family Page 6