by Lahey, Tyler
“Why do I always find myself with such Neanderthals?”
Jaxton turned to the sultry voice, wishing it didn’t still make him tingle. He looked at Adira’s dark eyes and shuddered, hoping no one could tell how much he wanted her. She was supposed to be for his best friend.
“You must like the attention,” Jaxton ventured, unnaturally nervous.
Adira turned to him, her slender figure shifting in the darkness. “What, from you buffoons? Not a chance,” she cooed. They all laughed easily, but Jaxton forced a smile instead.
“Where is Bennett, anyways?”
Adira shrugged, her straight, black hair shimmering under the street-light.
Liam smiled mischievously, resembling a drunken lumberjack. “Well c’mon, don’t spare any details. What happened?” Though Liam never smoked, Jaxton saw he now puffed contently on a cigar. Jaxton guessed the choice of brand had had everything to do with the name of the cigar, and nothing to do with its actual flavors. It was hard not to like him, that bear of a man.
Adira pursed her lips. She wore no makeup, Jaxton noticed. But she didn’t need to. He hated the power her dark eyes and black hair held over him.
“I guess I should have expected this from you. Nothing has happened between us,” she purred.
The four men around her guffawed. She shook her head, smiling. “It’s true!”
Jaxton affected a light mood, but inside he was elated. He knew it was wrong of him, but he couldn’t help it.
“If it hadn’t been for me, he would have never asked for your number,” Elvis pronounced boldly. He grinned eagerly, his hairless face stretching into a broad smile.
“Is that so?” Adira asked, naturally curious.
“Well, how did he do it? I had a pickup line all set up. Every clever one liner that’s ever come out of this group probably came out of this wise mind of mine first.”
Adira gestured for more vodka from a crinkled bottle, and turned it up with a grimace. “He mumbled something about thinking I was cute and wondered if I wanted to get coffee.”
Troy sputtered, spitting all over Elvis. “Key word, mumbled. Tell me you could see him shivering in fear.”
“But it worked!” Adira stressed, her teeth flashing happily.
Elvis frowned disapprovingly. “Well I had one all lined up. I was also across the street watching this whole thing happen, not to creep you out. No, I was behind the truck. Anyways, he was supposed to use…”
Liam interjected, chuckling “Do you have an ugly boyfriend? No? Want one?”
Adira shook her head, obviously entertained. “Stop it. Bennett isn’t ugly at all.”
Elvis ran his fingers through his pompadour and winked. “I prefer... I’m going to have to ask you to leave. You’re making the other girls look bad.”
“That is literally… so fucking awful,” Troy groaned, itching his aggressive 5-o clock shadow.
Adira smiled softly. “He could have said anything. I’ve been waiting for him to approach me.”
Jaxton felt his heart plummet as he heard Adira speak. He swiftly changed the subject. “Elvis, my man, we need to get you a little more intoxicated if you’re ever going to have a chance with Harley tonight.” Elvis furrowed his brow and pursed his lips as if he was staring across an epic span of terrain. His small hands flicked up to his perfectly coiffed hair and slicked it back even further.
“Lets do it,” he said, with a flair for the dramatic.
Even Troy relented from his customary Neanderthal barrage of criticism, pleased that Elvis was stepping up the challenge.
“A swig for each,” he slurred, clapping his strong hands on his friends’ shoulders. Troy scratched his face with a rough, callused hand, and drew up to speak. “It’s been a pleasure boys, an honor,” his eyes scurried sluggishly around the group, slowed by the creeping strength of the Popov $14 vodka.
Adira cleared her throat loudly. Troy flung his glazed-over eyes to her. “You too, hun.”
Jaxton found himself staring at the dark haired girl, wondering what kinds of sounds she would make.
“How you doing, bud?” Liam clapped him on the shoulder.
Jaxton snapped his head out of it; he felt the buzz coming on stronger. “Let’s not waste all our time on the Potomac. We should go out soon.”
“And we will!”
Jaxton watched as Liam, the gentle giant, clasped the ferocious ROTC-trainee on the shoulder. Troy received Liam’s massive hand appreciatively, his head rocking back in exaggerated drunk surprise. “Be all you can be, man,” Liam said sheepishly.
Troy snatched the final bottle and tossed it to Elvis, who of course did not catch it. Jaxton watched as he resumed a model pose, brow furrowed. The man’s fresh kicks and polished look threw most people for a loop. Elvis had the exterior of a smooth operator, confident and casual. But, of course, he was a huge goofball when it came down to it, Jaxton mused with a grin. Elvis took a quick swig, far too short for Troy, who groaned loudly in disapproval. Elvis grimaced and swallowed.
“To the booty I’m about to plunder- I salute you.” His face never lost the stone cold gaze, even as the others cracked up in the swampy night air around him.
“Elvis, how about you never say that again. Thanks,” Adira said with a sarcastic smile.
“Let’s not get too sentimental just yet.” Jaxton grinned, tossing his phone to Liam.
Liam indicated Jaxton’s phone. “A party in the Fulton dorms? Aren’t those underclassmen?” He questioned with a cocked eyebrow, already knowing the answer. Jaxton shrugged, flaring out his lower lip and beckoning them. Liam looked to Elvis, knowing they shared a bond of many sweltering and anxious hours in the library, driven forward by little orange pills. They shrugged, raising eyebrows, and set off down the paved path to follow their two friends. One moved like a bear, and the other, a greaser. Troy huffed and puffed after them.
“Oh my god I can’t miss this. Bennett can meet us there,” Adira said, her thumbs tapping her phone.
Jaxton followed moodily, angry at his own disappointment.
Chapter Two
16 hours before Outbreak. Washington, D.C
Jaxton’s vision was fuzzy and crisp simultaneously. He felt it the appropriate word would be “fuzzing”. He needed to tell his friends how he felt right that instant, and looked up. Perhaps he had eaten too many of the mushrooms. Then he felt stupid. He knew he had to keep it cool-he didn’t want people to know he was freaking out. He knew that was an unspoken rule. Instead, he forced the compulsion down and surveyed the room Jax saw groups of men strutting like peacocks displaying plumage, and girls wearing far too little clothing attending to this group of peacocks or that. He felt a familiar tugging emanating from his loins, and fought to ignore it. He just felt like surveying tonight, felt like being the man with the knowledge. This was an experience, he felt. He was really onto something here. He saw Elvis with his hand on a girl’s hip in the corner. Elvis spoke to her the whole time while maintaining an admirably stoic appearance. Everything about his manner was artificial, Jaxton thought with amusement.
Snapping his eyes shut, he massaged his head as he felt a wave of nausea. “You ok man?” He heard.
Liam, the bear, was staring at him, sipping on a beer on the couch. Jaxton looked at him hard for a second, and then remembered Liam hadn’t had the mushrooms. He groaned inwardly; where was someone he could connect with? Though he didn’t feel panicked, his mind was certainly not at ease. An idiotic looking frat-star cranked the thumping electronic dance music up, till it was hammering in his ears. Jaxton suddenly felt overwhelmed. The music was too thundering, too emotional, and too powerful. The mingling boys and girls intimidated him, and suddenly he thought he looked like a creep, sitting on the couch conked out. He tried his best to be chill, whatever that meant, but his field of vision was a slowly changing landscape. There were no visual creations parading in front of him, but everything he saw was thru a lens. Sometimes the lens morphed a person so they were buzzing and blurry
with motion, other times they looked bright and flush with exaggerated natural color.
There was Troy, shouting viciously, beer staining his shirt. He had a little group gathered around him and he was making exaggerated hand gestures and grinding up against eager, bright-eyed girls. They didn’t hold it against him. In fact, they mostly enjoyed it. Attention from the alpha male? Why not? Jaxton stood and scanned the room, feeling his own stomach roil and roll. He scratched his own brown beard and rose, ignoring Liam’s concern.
The little hairs on his muscular arm rose slightly as he felt a soft touch upon him. Jaxton looked down at a girl’s flushed face, who was grinning like a fool. “Hi there,” she slurred. “I think you bumped into me.” Out of habit more than anything else, Jaxton felt himself examine her up and down. His inhibitions had been removed slightly, and he knew he lingered too long on her exposed chest. He quickly discovered she was very attractive, shapely and eager. He wished it was Adira. Where had she gone? Jaxton looked around, ignoring the supple blond. He didn’t really want to be here.
“Yo, I’m not feeling this,” he heard a familiar voice.
Jaxton turned, and felt a wave of relief wash over him as he found his partner in crime. Bennett was three inches from his face. “Let’s fucking roll, man,” Jaxton stammered. They shoved past the cloudy-eyed girl and busted out of the dorm-room, passing six people working excitedly and sloppily together to heat up a pizza.
“I needed to get clear of there. Jesus, this air feels good.”
They stepped out of the brick building and onto the sidewalk, the humidity making their sweaty t-shirts stick. Jaxton felt a strong attachment to his shorter, stocky friend, knowing they had both taken the mushrooms together. Here was someone who knew how he felt.
“Probably not the best call for a banger in the freshman hall,” Jaxton said, shaking the feeling that all the buildings were buzzing around him. Or maybe they were fuzzing. Fuzzy buzzing, he thought.
“Monuments?” Bennett said, clearly wanting to get off the school’s downtown campus and into the wooded area around the capital’s monuments of stone and light. Jaxton nodded and they set off at a brisk pace down the avenue past loud and raucous crowds of unruly students.
Jogging up the worn marble steps, they raised their eyes to gaze upon a great rectangle of marble columns, soaring to the sky to support a rectangular slab. Jaxton sighed, appreciating the beauty of the glowing white marble in the sultry night air. The city stretched out before them. The hallucinatory properties of his peanut butter crackers had faded on the walk. Replacing it was an overwhelming need to speak frankly about something, anything. He felt slightly giddy, and highly appreciative. Jaxton glanced sideways at Bennett. The skinny lad with the messy blond hair was his best friend. Jaxton found himself examining his prior lust at his friend’s latest fling with disgust.
“Where did Adira go?”
Bennett pursed his lips. “She was there. But she started talking to two other guys, so I said fuck it.”
Jaxton did his best to sound casual, fearing suddenly that one day, the girl would be the end of their friendship. “Have you guys hooked up yet?”
Bennett threw a pebble down the marble stairs. “Eh. We made out, last weekend. I tried to get her back to my place, and she said she wasn’t that type of girl.”
“Well, that’s a good sign, dude.”
“I guess. I just feel like I need to get my body count up.”
Jaxton chuckled, remembering how long ago it had been since he felt that way. “Dude, that shit doesn’t matter at all. All it takes is one girl and she can erase all your insecurities, all your inexperience.”
Bennett groaned, “Remember the last girl? That chick I met at that acapella party we somehow got into…yeah, pretty sure I never told you this but I was so damn nervous I couldn’t even get it up.”
“Jesus man, look. You gotta stop thinking about it as a trophy. It’s supposed to be an experience. And once you get that down, you’re golden.”
“I gotta have this one.”
Jaxton felt his pulse quicken, seeing how serious Bennett was. “Why?”
Bennett hesitated. “She’s the easiest girl to be around, since, I don’t even know. I mean its natural, effortless. Same sense of humor, finally. How difficult is that to find? I’ve been looking for years, it feels like.”
“And…”
Bennett chuckled. “Yeah, and she has a great ass. But everyone knows that. Those dark eyes though, they’re always on my mind.”
Jaxton didn’t say anything, feeling his jealously rising. Why hadn’t he asked for her number? They had both been there, that day outside the gym. He grunted, fixated by the shimmering lake that stretched out like a long finger in front of them; its water was perfectly motionless.
“What the hell are we guna do with our lives?” Bennett gestured out with a quick flick of the wrist, in momentary disgust.
“We’re guna move to New York, and be roommates. And buy dope fitted suits, and make a lot of money.”
Bennett sneered, “I don’t just wanna work at some business or a bank for 60 hours a week. There’s gotta be something else, some fire, dude. Maybe I’ll become an acclaimed erotic novelist?”
“You could join the army,” Jaxton indicated back up the avenue towards their university hidden among the city blocks. “Troy seems to be on the path to seize glory.”
“For this country? Not a chance. How many poor bastards signed up after the Twin Towers fell and ended up dying in the desert, years after Bush said Mission Accomplished?” He reached up and sub-consciously made sure his messy blond hair was indeed still messy. “I don’t even know if I can afford New York, don’t you have any loans?”
Jaxton shrugged. “No. I got that scholarship, and my parents paid for the rest. Listen, we’re going to graduate. And then we’re going to move into a swanky little joint. East village.”
“You’ve never even been to the east village.”
Jaxton shrugged, “So what? It’s the happenin’ spot right?”
Bennett smiled and sighed. “Why did we choose such useless liberal arts majors?”
Jaxton coiffed his brown hair back. “Because this is 2015. You’re an individual, and you’re going to save the world, and life’s an inspirational poster, and you need to find your passion.”
Bennett guffawed. “Some bullshit, huh. I wish I could fight with a great general, march with Caesar, Alexander.”
Jaxton sighed. “The college student in the capital longs to fight with Alexander. Get the fuck outta here. Look man. Bottom line, I’m not worried about it. I feel like everything is going to work out for us.”
Bennett shook his head. “You remember my neighbor, Dan? He graduated six years ago. Seven years ago, and he’s living in the same musty bedroom from middle school. I talked to the guy last summer. He said he was so hooked by all the things everyone told him he could be; writer, director, entrepreneur, banker…that he never really became anything. Just grabbed lazily at some things as they passed him by, all the while thinking he was going to be doing great things. Now he’s twenty-nine, twenty-nine years old and the prime of his life is slippin’ away from him. He told me they got him a new bed, though, his parents did. What a failure. Makes me sick, man.”
“Don’t be too judgey. You waste a lot of your own energy doing that. And people notice it too. They might laugh with you in the moment, but they don’t forget that you were the one to say it,” Jaxton answered.
Bennett remained silent, as he usually did after Jaxton rebuked him.
Jaxton let the moment pass and drank in the damp air of late May. There was a chill on the night wind that would disappear by June. “I feel good.” He stood, watching how the dim streetlights cast little dancing shadows on the neat rows of trees all across the park. There was some magic there, though he knew its appearance was rooted in a certain fungus he had consumed hours before. The lights seemed to dance and flicker across the softly swaying leaves. His mind was transfixed
by it, and in a series of moments the significance of the hour drew upon him, each wave more powerful a revelation than the last. He had, in all honesty, entered this place as a boy, and was now a man. Here had had searched for and found friends that he knew would remain with him for the rest of his days. Last, but certainly not least, women had been demystified.
“This is actually the end, huh,” Jaxton said quietly.
“Stepping out into the unknown. We’ve had a life-plan for every year of our life up until now. Guaranteed friends, place to live, all gone. Not anymore.”
“What kind of finale would this be without our unit at full strength?” Jaxton laughed, indicating an approaching group of boisterous youths. Troy, Liam, Elvis, and two girls appeared out from under the gloom of the swaying trees. Their laughter carried fast up the stepped marble, drawing the attention of a park guard. The man strutted over in matching apparel, quite clearly taking himself more seriously than anyone else did. As he attempted to establish a stern façade, Troy snapped him a mock salute and cracked some jab that drew the amusement of the women in tow.
Adira approached Bennett, moving like a cat in the night, and settled down beside him, clasping the back of his neck with her long fingers. So she was back. She leaned back briefly, and Jaxton met her eyes, which were penetrating and dark. They made him nervous.
Troy strutted in front, looking utterly lost trying to maintain his composure. He plopped down next to Jaxton and clasped him on the shoulder, trying to meet his eyes. He failed, and just leaned back on the cold marble with his eyes shut. “This feels nice.”
Elvis attempted to strut next to the other female, following her like a lost dog, though she seemed to ignore him. Jaxton had to suppress a chuckle as he saw what the evening had done to his swagger. Elvis’s face was puffy and flushed, narrow eyes fluttering with exhaustion, and his once perfectly coifed hair was disheveled. He plopped down on the hard marble with all the grace of a pregnant woman navigating a roller rink.