As if God himself wanted to test that theory, my doorbell rang and I knew… I fucking knew.
Mya
I sit on the couch with Noah, Cal and Asa as the news reports the biggest tragedy of this entire thing. Yes, children were murdered and tortured…. But now Sam would pay for Tenpenner’s sins because he killed him.
“Levi Tenpenner of Battleground, Washington, died today after injuries sustained in a physical altercation with the father of one of Tenpenner’s victims. Landry Snow is on the scene now in Tacoma with more information. Landry?”
“It is a crazy scene here in Tacoma, Kelly. As Sam Sullivan, the father of three-year-old Kace Sullivan, who was abducted just shy of ten years ago, is escorted inside handcuffed. We reported earlier this week that Levi Tenpenner was attacked in the courtroom by Sullivan after refusing to plead guilty as opposed to No Contest.
Tenpenner was facing multiple charges including sodomy and forceable rape of a child, kidnapping, and murder, when he gave detailed instructions to the whereabouts of little Kace Sullivan. Sullivan attacked him Thursday in court when Tenpenner refused to admit his guilt. Sullivan was released on bail late this afternoon on pending assault charges. Now, he is facing murder, possibly manslaughter. We will be here reporting as more information comes in, but to recap Kelly, Levi Tenpenner, accused of multiple violent charges has died due to the injuries sustained by Sam Sullivan.”
“Turn it off,” Cal says, and leans toward me to console me. I didn’t even know I was crying until he wiped my tears. “Listen to me, My. We will get him the best lawyers money can buy. This isn’t murder and the world know it.”
I look at him shaking my head no. “What’s done is done. He took a life. I don’t see any court being lenient.”
“You would be surprised. Sam won’t plead guilty to the charges and a judge will need to hear him out. All he needs is a judge with kids and he has sympathy,” Noah states, as he looks at his phone as he and Cal’s start alerting over and over again.
“Media coverage will be a nightmare. Asa, can you get T on this?” Cal says, and I sit back watching as these three men try to do damage control. I wish I had their enthusiasm. I won’t sit here and show my fear though, fuck that. I will fight for Sam just as hard.
“I say let the media know everything. The world will sympathize with Sam, say a few life matters campaigns. We aren’t talking a race issue or police brutality. This was a father killing the sadistic fuck that tortured and killed his child. The world will mourn Kace and support him,” I say, and start pulling up the internet on my laptop.
“I agree,” I hear Tayla’s voice come through on Asa’s speaker. “Where are you guys right now?”
“We are still at Sam’s,” I say, and like moths to a flame, I see headlights coming in one after the other. Sam lives in a wooded area in a modern two-story home, but it isn’t secluded or private.
“I am sending security and cars there now. Meet at my cabin in Yakama,” Tayla says, and disconnects the call.
We wait until Drake and the security team for my brother’s band get us safely in a slick black Escalade. We are riding together, but there are five total all going different directions like the president. It is annoying that anyone should go to this extreme for privacy.
By the time we make it to T’s cabin in Yakama it is almost four in the morning and with hours of media coverage all saying the same version of bullshit, I wanted to scream.
“Have a seat,” Tayla says, her phone glued to her ear with a conference call of some type on her laptop as she motions to Cal to take over on the laptop.
“Hey,” He says, confused I assume by whoever he is talking to.
“Mr. Dorian, I am Frank Adeleke, Mr. Sullivan’s new attorney,” The man was older, maybe in his fifties with greying dark hair. He was clean cut and well-manicured, and I liked him more than Poet immediately.
“Where is Poet?” My brother asks.
“Fired!” Tay hisses in a whisper, before mumbling a few words and ending her call.
“Fired?” Why?” Noah asks, and I look to Tay for answers. She was once my soon to be sister in law. I didn’t agree with her cheating on my brother and hurting him, but he was happily married with a family now, so I held no grudges.
“Sam fired her the minute he made bail.” Tay explains to my complete shock.
“He did what!”
She nods and squeezes my shoulder. “He didn’t want a defense attorney that defends men like Tenpenner and Poet Degrassi Grey was that kind of attorney.”
“Sam hired me. My firm handles mostly cases like this. Technically, he falls under vigilante justice, which in theory most people agree with, but rarely does a court. My firm has lost ten percent of the cases we take to court and defend. In this situation, this is the best defense.”
“Mr. Adeleke, how much are you charging for your firm’s services?” Noah asks, and I swear if he had a checkbook, he would be writing it now. You cannot buy that type of loyalty or friendship.
“Our services are free. We seek these cases out in our spare time on other cases we are working.” He shuffles through some papers and holds up one. One that I wished I never knew about. “I have just met with Sam and he has asked that you all leave him alone. You are welcome in court, but he wants no visitors or distractions, and I quote, ‘Everyone worry about your lives. Whatever happens next I am fine with.”
“He can’t be serious,” I say, and run my fingers through my hair.
“Are you Miss Dorian?” He asks me.
“Yes, sorry. I am Mya Dorian,” I greet myself, hoping that I am the exception on his little list of demands.
“Miss Dorian, he says, and this is verbatim, ‘Mya, focus on your studio and life. There is nothing you can do so stop worrying. I mean it.’”
Cal looks at me and I know he sees my sadness even when I hide it. “Fine. Let him know he can fuck himself.”
Cal and Noah both laugh, and Cal hugs me as he talks to Sam’s lawyer. “Please don’t repeat that. She is feisty scared and tired.”
Frank nods with boredom. “Duly noted. I will have a court date assigned on Monday and get in contact with you then. He will have a preliminary hearing first and there will be a date set after that.”
“Will he plead guilty?” I ask, praying he will.
“Client information, Miss Dorian.”
I nod, numb from it all and sit in shock on the couch with a vodka tonic in one hand and a joint in the other.
This is really fucking happening.
Chapter Twenty
Fuck you I won’t do what you tell me
Fuck you I won’t do what you tell me
Fuck you I won’t do what you tell me
FUCK YOU I WON’T DO WHAT YOU TELL ME!!!
MOTHERFUCKER!!!!
Sully
I lay in my bunk and stare at the ceiling thinking of Kace and wondering if she is disappointed in me, or if she understands. I took a life, I get that. Maybe I should give a shit, but the details of what he did to my child…to the others? Yeah, I can’t find the guilt anywhere.
I close my eyes and remember the last time I held her. It was the night before she was taken and I was laying in bed with her watching The Little Mermaid. I had no idea that would be the last time it was just her and me. We sang along with Sebastian as he sings to ‘Kiss the girl’. I kissed her cheek each time and relished in her laughter.
“Silly daddy.”
“Silly Kace,” I say, and kiss her nose.
“What’s your favorite color Daddy?”
I hear her voice as if she is here and the tears flow from my eyes without shame.
“You are silly. Kace Deja Sullivan will always be my favorite color.”
“Daddy is mine, too.”
She said and yawned before falling asleep without effort. I had stayed there with her head on my chest until after two in the morning when Deja woke me to come to bed. I go to this moment the most. I wonder why I stayed that night? Usually, I st
ayed until she slept then slipped from her room, but that night I couldn’t leave her.
I am glad I didn’t. Like so many regrets, I still wish I had stayed all night. I wish I never had that party. Wish I never left the shop. I have a lifetime full of regrets and the death of Levi Tenpenner doesn’t take the pain away as I had hoped.
I am required to face the judge tomorrow and give my plea. I am guilty of his death, but nothing else. I will plead guilty to get it all over with, but I will not fake remorse. I am facing eight to fifteen according to my new lawyer. Nobody is charging me with murder, but the debate is on involuntary manslaughter and manslaughter.
I always thought that manslaughter sounded much worse than murder in any degree, but it basically not premeditated or planned. Only Noah and Asa know I planned it a million times, but they won’t talk.
I think of Mya and her perfection and how I tainted it. Twenty-one-year-old, feisty and endearing, Mya Dorian. I took her, fucked her senseless, and tried to find happiness with her in my pain. I knew, dammit, I knew I would destroy us. If I regret anything, it is that. I separated us by killing Tenpenner and if I get eight to fifteen, I sure as fuck won’t let her wait for me.
Losing her, even in the hypothetical, forces more tears from my eyes. Maybe I am destined to lose the females I love. Maybe it’s my curse for something I unknowingly did. Deja left, Kace was taken, and now my girl Mya. If I asked her to wait for me, I know she would, and in it she would burn her life up.
I want to serve my time, pay what I owe to society, and just live quietly. I make my plans for whatever prison sentence I serve and create a list for Frank to handle after. I get no sleep, none. I sit awake all night mapping out the future of the shop, my house, and everything I leave behind. I have clients on the books and hopefully we can have Chad stay a little longer to get through. I plan everything down to a caretaker for Kace’s mausoleum. Plan it all as the sun rises, though I can’t see it.
When the guards come to get me for court, I look at my cell, nothing of value inside. It is cleaned from top to bottom; with my mattress rolled up, blanket folded, and stacked neatly at the foot of the concrete block that acts as a frame.
I turn my back and place my hands behind me in front of the folding slot on the door. The guards open it to cuff me before they open my cell. They tell me exactly what moves to make as they put chains on my ankles. “Your lawyer is bringing you a suit to wear for court. You will be with him, in custody for an hour, prior to your time slot with the judge. Any issues we will place you in a room with a camera and you will face the judge cuffed and on camera. Understand?”
I nod and tell the guard I do understand and follow the two men as they lead me to face my fate.
Can’t fight it, that’s for damn sure. Time to face my future.
I sit and listen to the DA and my lawyer battle the proof of unintentional and intentional manslaughter. They keep saying the same thing over and over, and I wonder if anyone will ask me if it was intentional.
I feel Mya’s eyes on me as she watches the two teams debate if I am the monster or if it was Tenpenner. They discuss temporary insanity.
Nope, I knew what I was doing.
They discuss any criminal background I have.
Not so much as a speeding ticket, but I look like a killer. The defense is judging me, but I am clean as polished silver. I just look like a criminal to them.
They discuss what Tenpenner did to Kace and I ignore what I can because it makes me sick.
“Mr. Sullivan. How do you plead to the charges filed against you?” The Judge asks me, after he takes a break to review it all. I am standing beside Frank and though he might kill me, I have to say my piece.
“Your honor can I speak freely?” I ask the Judge.
“What are you doing Sam?” Frank whispers lowly to me but I ignore him.
“Please,” he says, with a wave of his hand.
“I don’t feel bad that Levi Tenpenner is dead. I can’t sit here and lie to you saying I feel bad. I feel for his family for their loss and I didn’t have any intention of killing him, let alone causing a serious injury. It happened and I feel bad it went that far, but not that it went that far if you can make sense of that. He was scum, a vile, and disgusting thing, that was wasting the air my daughter should still be breathing. That all the children he murdered should be breathing. He is who felt no guilt or remorse. I would do things differently if given the chance, but it is moot because when you are dead, you are dead. Myself, my daughter’s mother and these other families, have experienced the coldness of that truth, so I accept my part in his death, but refuse to plead guilty for anything other than my hands being the ones that killed him. Guilt means I did something wrong and there is no way you or anyone else will ever get me to see his death as a crime. I am a fucking hero, sir, all due respect, but I protected more children in killing him than the law did when he was alive.”
The gasps in the courtroom were loud as I stood my ground. I had the support of my friends and family, but also those of Tenpenner’s victims’ families and a million and one advocates defending me outside. I know I will be punished, I accept it. All I hope is that this judge see’s what I said and not the list of laws written when the world wasn’t as evil.
“Is that all Mr. Sullivan?”
“No. Actually, I have one question to ask you all. You have seen the smile on my daughter’s face, captured and suspended in time at three years old. You have seen the smiling faces of his other victims. Victim is the key word here and Levi Tenpenner is not a victim. So, tell me what would any of you done if you were in my shoes? Would anyone here consider yourself guilty of a crime had it been your child’s murderer? I am guilty of killing him, but not of any crime.”
I wait, looking at the District Attorney who a few short weeks ago was on my side. I look at the Judge and the people lining the walls of this courtroom. I know I will face time, I must. This is America and we punish. I just wonder if they will make an example of me or if they can see my side at all.
Mya
I wait on pins and needles as I squeeze Noah and Deja’s hands in mine. The man I love is asking a room full of judgmental men and women to not judge him and understand. I watch as the Judge takes his time, eying Sam, trying to see if he agrees or not. All I can hope for is his being on our side.
“It is my duty, for the great state of Washington to pass a deserving sentence to you Mr. Sullivan,” he looks at Sam, sad eyes looking into defiant ones. “Deserving in my eyes as opposed to the laws? Well, I am at a stalemate. You took a life regardless of intent you took a life. I, however, can not live with myself if I sentenced you to the maximum. I feel for you, as I do for the families that were so affected by the callousness of Mr. Tenpenner, but it is the law who decides punishment, and for that I have to sentence you.”
I can’t breathe as the tears fill my eyes knowing this judge will take the man I love from me. I hate it, knowing the suffering he endured for ten fucking years, knowing he has paid enough.
“I sentence you to eight years, the maximum sentence to be served at Olympic correction facility in Forks, Washington. I am offering you all, but twenty-four months removed for suffering. You will be in a minimum-security camp where you will work off your time served for those twenty-four months. You may be up for parole after ninety days.”
He slams that gavel down and I swear I feel it in my chest, and my tears spill over. “Sam!” I cry out as the guards cuff him like a criminal when he is a father destroyed.
He looks at me with a soft smile. “It’s alright, Pet, you’ll see.”
I shake my head no as Cal and Jen hold me up while I watch them take him from me. He couldn’t kiss me or hold me, just like a ghost. He was gone.
Mya
We leave the courthouse with Frank and his team, where we are met with a shitload of news crews and picket lines supporting Sam. Frank explains to the press the details of the sentence and the crowds went insane at the news. “This is fucking may
hem,” I say to my brother and Jen, as we try to push through to our cars. I love seeing everyone as upset as we are for his sentence, and I hope the Judge hears it and rethinks the sentence.
“We are going to the cabin for a few days to get away from the press and the shop is closed this week,” Noah explains, as we all get in different chauffeured Escalades. “I think you should come with us until shit dies down.”
“Is Tayla’s cabin big enough?” I ask, completely numb as I discuss the size of a cabin while the man I love is sent to rot in a prison.
“We are going to Shame and Cassa’s,” he says, and I know their cabin is huge. Shamus James is the drummer in my brothers’ band and their cabin is like a ten room fortress with a guest house and security.
“Okay, yeah,” I say, and look out the window resting my head on Jenny’s shoulder. “You can stay with us. Our cabin is very close by. You know how Shame and Cal are. We have Lex with us too.”
I nod, still unable to talk.
“We are going to have Deja and Cordell with us as well as Sam’s dad and Noah and Bright,” Cal explains, and squeezes my hand.
“The guys from the shop are going to Shame’s with Chad, Carrie, and the kids,” Noah explains, and I don’t know why they think I care. I want to lock myself in the shower and cry forever. He is gone for two years with hope of only three months. I have watched enough Discovery ID to know he won’t make parole the first time. Who knows when I will see him again?
“Do you think with prison time in place he will let us visit?” I ask anyone who is listening.
“I don’t know,” Noah says quietly. “I have known Sam almost my entire life. He is stubborn and patient. If he doesn’t want to see anyone for the full twenty-four months, he won’t. It’s just how he is.”
5 Words: Paradox Ink Trilogy Page 13