Lowering her arms, she concentrated on the room. It felt so small, as if it were closing in on her. She needed to get the hell out of here. Lying alone in silence and unable to sleep kept her in a constant state of thought. She needed to move, get her mind off things.
She scratched at her covered skin.
The top, pants, and undergarments Tathia had given her were silky and soft compared to the rough clothes Iris had taken from the basement. These smelled like flowers, maybe even her namesake. A scent she hadn’t even realized she would recognize until she’d sniffed it.
Iris was glad for the long-sleeved top. It fit snug, as did the soft pants. It would make it easier to move quickly.
As grateful as she was to these people for their hospitality and the amount of times one of their kind had saved her life, she couldn’t stay here. She couldn’t look them in the eye—not when she’d been responsible for White’s death. Not when they all knew she’d killed those men in such a barbaric way.
Tears prickled behind her eyes. She closed them, and another face entered her mind.
Fox. She couldn’t face him, either. The hurt and disgust in his eyes had appeared so final. Disappointment was mixed in there, too. It was as if he’d hoped she wouldn’t be the one responsible for the death of his friends in the basement. She had…that much was obvious. She couldn’t change or deny it any longer. She was some sort of killer who lost control and tore people apart.
Was she some sort of avenging angel? The thought made her stomach fall.
Someone capable of such violence couldn’t be an angel.
“Is everything okay?” Tathia interrupted her thoughts.
Her eyes snapped open. The woman stood in front of the door, on the other side of the small room. She hadn’t moved an inch since they’d stepped inside. “I’m so thirsty.”
“Would you like me to get you something to drink?”
“Oh no, I couldn’t—”
“Don’t be silly.” The woman’s hand was already wrapped around the door handle. “I’ll be right back. Don’t go anywhere.”
Iris nodded and flashed a small smile.
“I mean it. Don’t go anywhere.” She glared at her for a few seconds before slipping outside.
As soon as Tathia left, she bounced off the bed and pressed her body flush against the door. The metal chilled her. She felt like the worst person in this God-forsaken world, but everyone would be better off without her here. Deep down inside, she knew it was true.
She wasn’t sure where she would go, but maybe trying to track down the bastard who claimed to own her would be a good start. There’d be people willing to divulge information along the way. Sure, she had no way to pay for it, but in the slums, everyone could barter somehow. Couldn’t they?
“Iris, come back to me.” The voice chilled her to the bone. No wonder he’d been able to project into her mind. What if these constant thoughts were attempts of actual communication and not just memories? The thought rattled her, and she shivered.
Slowly, she turned the door handle, opened the door an inch, and peeked outside. The lights were still lit along the corridor. She could hear muffled chatter from several of the open doorways on both sides, but she was sure she could slip by unnoticed.
Her feet, now comfortably tucked inside black knee-high boots, moved stealthily. Not a sound. Slow and careful steps got her outside. She closed the door and turned left. She stopped for a second, staring at the spot where White had been killed. Her heart ached and stomach twisted.
All the bodies had been removed. Most of the blood had been wiped away. None of the carnage she’d caused was left, but she could still see it imprinted inside her brain.
Iris shook her head, moved forward, and crossed one doorway after another. No one noticed her gradual movements. No one heard her. She’d almost reached the end of the corridor, where the door was now missing after it had been blown to smithereens by the hunters. Someone guarded it, but she could still slip by.
Only a few more steps, until the burden of her bad luck and misfortunes would never affect these peaceful people. They could once again close themselves off to the outside world and not be bothered by the likes of her.
She sucked in a deep breath and took the first step over the last doorway. There had been no reason for her to peek inside. It was dark, the door only slightly ajar.
A hand snaked over her mouth. Another hand yanked her inside the room. The door shut behind her. She was led backward a few steps, her feet struggling in midair. When her body was thrown against the wall—the hand never leaving her mouth—anger surged inside her.
The tips of her hair curled with energy. Lightning cut into her thoughts, splitting her brain with agony.
“Iris, calm down. It’s me.”
Her mind cleared.
She focused on Fox’s blue eyes. They were wide and staring at her intently. She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him. His hand slipped from her mouth.
He smelled so good. Maybe he’d bathed as well.
“Where were you going?” He pulled back enough to stare down at her. One of his hands touched her cheek, slow and careful. “Oh, hell.” His mouth suddenly covered hers, demanding she kiss him back with as much intensity as he had to give.
She did, and all of the confusing emotions he’d stirred in her rushed out. Her arms wrapped tighter around his neck, his arms encircled her waist and drew her body closer to his.
A new set of instincts kicked into gear as both of their hands moved wildly, everywhere. His ran up and down her sides. When they paused near her breasts, she groaned, wanted him to touch her.
Fox stopped, pulled back to meet her eyes, and then continued to kiss her down the side of her neck and back up to trace her jaw line. Each kiss enticed her more, until a fire raged between her legs, and Iris wanted to do whatever she had to in order to extinguish it.
“Iris,” he whispered along her skin. He kissed under her chin, slowly rising to meet her mouth.
She wrapped her legs around his hips, and he hoisted her up. Her spine pressed up against the wall, but at least now their mouths were level. Her tongue swept inside his mouth, tracing his as if they couldn’t get close enough no matter what they did. An unfamiliar buzz raced from his tongue to hers, making her weak in the knees.
She wanted to rip his clothes off and have him rip hers off as well. Lost in these crazy musings, she jumped when the door opened.
Iris looked over Fox’s shoulder and met Tathia’s gaze. She stood by the door, color darkening her cheeks as she stared wide-eyed, backed out, and left the room without a single word.
Fox’s lips left hers. “Damn.” He took a step back, and she slid back to her feet.
Her heart hammered inside her chest. Her body felt weak and abandoned with every new step he took, until no part was left touching, and she mourned the loss.
Fox ran a hand through his hair, turned away, then back again to look at her. “I’m sorry. I didn’t pull you in here for that…it was inconsiderate, considering what happened earlier.”
She shook her head. “Don’t say sorry.” She still didn’t have a clear memory of whatever had happened between her and Snap, but it couldn’t be anything like this. Yet, the mention of it made the visions of her encounter with the bounty hunters flood back into her mind. Goose bumps raced under her clothes.
“Where were you going?” Fox didn’t waste any time shifting into interrogation mode.
“I was…” Should she tell him the truth? What good would it do to conceal anything else from him? He may still have his own secrets and hers could be lost somewhere inside her mind, but what she did know, she had to share. “I was going to leave these people. I’ve already hurt them enough.”
He sighed, avoiding her eyes. “You didn’t cause them any pain. Those bastards who broke in here hurt them, and that asshole Snap betrayed them. You simply…reacted.”
“Is that what you really think? Or are you trying to make me feel better?” Her
arms felt numb at her sides, legs ready to collapse beneath her. If it wasn’t for the harsh wall she was leaning against, she would already be sprawled on the floor.
Fox remained silent for a while, his gaze roving everywhere around the room but on her. Was he raging a war within himself? He crossed his arms. A defensive pose.
“I want to make you feel better, Iris. I wish I could tell you exactly what the hell’s going on with you, with me, with this bloody city, but I have no idea. You may not have access to your memories, but I have no access to what’s going on or what’s ahead.” His shoulder sagged as he uncrossed his arms. “I do know you’ve become my number one priority, though.”
Her vision blurred. Where had the tears come from? Why did she feel the constant need to cry all the time? “Do you mean that?”
He nodded, stepping closer. “If you want to go, I’m coming with you. Nothing’s changed. I offered to get you help, and I still intend to.” Fox’s left hand extended in front of him. “We can’t leave until we say goodbye to these kind people and thank them for everything they’ve done. It’s the least we can do.” His blue eyes shimmered.
She pushed off the wall and placed her hand in his. Their fingers entwined around each other. Heat radiated from his fingertips to hers. She’d never known such intimacy.
“There’s no need to thank us.” Rue stood by the open door, Tathia behind her.
Iris glanced at Fox, smiled, and let his hand drop so she could approach the kind woman in the doorway. She wrapped her arms around Rue and started to sob. Every tinge of anguish Iris had held back after White’s death and the realization of what she could do to people, escaped in that one moment.
It had been stupid and cruel to think she could leave without telling anyone. It sounded even dumber now that she admitted to herself she had no idea how to get to this mysterious man willing to risk so many lives to get his hands on her.
“I wanted to save him,” Iris whispered as the tears left her weary and tired. Sleep still hadn’t graced her. Exhaustion was finally catching up with her.
Rue rubbed her back, comforting and motherly. “I know you did. We’re going to have a ceremony to say goodbye to White in a few hours. We’d love for you to be there, but before that you need to promise me you’ll accept my help with sleep. I know you haven’t slept a wink for too long. You too, Fox.”
Iris nodded.
Chapter Seventeen
The last thing Fox wanted—or needed—at the moment was sleep. His mind was racing as fast as his heart. He hadn’t been involved in such an intense exchange with a woman for a long time. Maybe longer than he cared to admit. Being so caught up in his father’s crazy world of power games had taken up his every available second. He’d somehow lost himself in trying to gain and keep his father’s admiration, even enough to constantly compete with that suck-up, Innes.
What a waste of a life. He’d wasted so many years on things that never mattered to him.
Iris made him feel things he hadn’t thought he was capable of. Most of his intimate encounters had involved quick interactions with the goal of releasing the pent-up frustrations in his life.
With Iris, it was different. Somehow, Fox wanted to please her more than anything in the world, and not just physically. Initially, all that mattered to him was finding the killer responsible for his team’s deaths…but now, he knew who it was, and it hadn’t changed a damn thing about the way she made him feel.
How the hell was he going to dangle her in front of his father like a carrot, now? Maybe that’s all he could do: dangle her. Find out just what he wanted, and then take Iris away from everything. To a place the great Kingsley Wentworth couldn’t touch or torment her.
Fox had no doubt his father had already done a bit of both to her.
His stomach dropped. This was a dangerous game.
“Come on, Fox. You and Iris both need some rest…especially if you’re going to be on your way soon.” Rue stood by the door, her arms still around the sobbing Iris.
For a second, he resented the woman for interrupting their intimate exchange. If she hadn’t gotten Tathia to search for Iris, what would have happened between them? Would they now be naked, bodies entangled on the small cot inside this room? He spared a quick, longing glance. Maybe Iris would’ve allowed him to comfort her, instead of Rue getting to do it.
He found missing out on that annoyed him a whole lot more than the physical exchange.
You’re going nuts, Fox. I’m definitely losing it if the thought of comforting her affects me more than getting her naked.
“Come on. You, too.” Rue released Iris, touched her face, and turned around. Tathia offered them both a small smile and mouthed sorry.
Iris waited for him to catch up and grabbed his hand. Her fingers were icy cold, but warmed once he held them tighter.
He didn’t want to leave her alone. Twice, they’d been inside separate rooms, and both times he hadn’t been able to catch a wink of sleep. Too worried about what she was doing across the corridor. It was how he’d seen her leave her room in the first place.
Watching behind his door, when he finally got the balls to walk out and approach her, Tathia had wandered out. He’d run into the closest open door and continued to move once he noticed Iris was heading for the exit. That he’d reached the one doorway left before she had was purely a miracle, but he was glad he had.
Hand-in-hand, they followed the two women out into the corridor in silence. Several people stood at the open doorways, but no one said a word. The corridor was mostly clean now, with only a few traces of blood left in some spots. Nothing like the carnage he’d first faced.
He wiped away the memory. It would only remind him of what Iris was capable of. He didn’t need to associate her with what had happened to the Spec-Ops team.
No, he couldn’t at the moment. Not yet.
“Okay, you two get inside, and I’ll be back with some tea to help you sleep.”
“You want us to stay together?” he asked, surprised after the conversation they’d had earlier.
Rue nodded. “Do you have any objections?”
He shook his head.
“I think it’s the reason why neither one of you can sleep. You need to find comfort in each other, draw strength from this experience, together.” Rue took a step forward and looked over her shoulder. “Besides, I’ve never stood in the way of those who were meant to be together.”
With that very forward and cryptic statement, she wandered up the corridor and disappeared inside one of the doorways.
Iris dragged him inside. A huge smile curved her pouty lips as she reached the bed and collapsed onto it. “I think it’s a great idea,” she said with a smile.
He didn’t say a word—just kept his hand in hers, arm extended as he looked down at her sitting on the edge of the cot. She really was beautiful. A natural beauty he could only sum up as ethereal. A strange word to come to mind, and one he couldn’t remember using before, but he’d heard it somewhere.
“Don’t you want to sleep with me?” Her eyes were wide as she said the words, maybe realizing too late what she’d just asked.
His pulse quickened, and blood traveled so fast inside his body, his head throbbed. Blood continued to race in the one direction he didn’t need it to go at the moment. Not when such a gorgeous woman would be lying beside him. Not when Rue was about to return with some concoction to help them both rest and sleep before they headed out on the rest of their insane quest.
“Of course I do. More than you could ever imagine.” He kept her hand in his as he fell onto the cot beside her. He brought her fingers to his lips and kissed each one. “I just don’t want to do anything we’ll both regret.”
She sighed. “There’s nothing I could do with you that I’ll regret.”
Fox dared to turn slightly, enough to meet her gaze. Her shiny, green eyes stared right into his very soul. He was convinced she could see everything he felt. “I think you’re right.” He closed the distance betwee
n them and kissed her softly, running his tongue inside her mouth. He felt the rush stir in his pants. He wanted her so badly. If Rue didn’t return with the tea soon, he’d find it really hard not to finish what they’d started in the other room.
“Here we are.” A cough at the door followed the words.
He opened his eyes and turned to face the woman who’d probably saved them from another impulsive situation. He knew he wanted Iris more than anything in this crappy world, but now wasn’t the right time. There were too many things still unsaid between them. Too many lost memories and pieces to a puzzle he was slowly putting together. Soon, they’d be able to indulge, but not while everything seemed so messy and uncertain.
Rue was right. Now, they needed rest.
“Here’s one for you, and one for you.” She handed them each a steaming cup.
He released Iris’s hand so he could wrap his fingers around the hot surface of the plastic mug. The steam rose into his nose, smelling sweet and bitter at the same time.
“Drink all of it. I’ll be back for you soon.” Rue stepped out of the room and closed the door behind her.
“This smells lovely.”
“Yeah, it does.” Fox nodded with a tentative sip. The hot liquid burned his tongue, but it felt heavenly. A calming sensation smoothed out along his body as soon as it raced down his throat and into his stomach. Every deep sip he took calmed him further, until he felt drowsy and without a care in the world.
Surprised when there was nothing left, he watched Iris drink the last of hers. She licked her lips, and he couldn’t stop himself from leaning forward to steal another kiss.
She returned it, and it was the most delicious thing he’d ever tasted.
He took the empty cup from her, placed both on the floor, and wrapped his arms around her, encouraging her to lie down beside him. Iris turned onto her side, facing the other way so he could spoon his body against hers. Both arms held her as if he were afraid to let go.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
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