“He definitely would Lizzie,” answers Kate and I notice that her voice is slightly shaky, but we say goodbye, knowing we’ll see each other very soon.
After ending one phone call, I decide to make another call – to Tabitha. Allowing the phone to ring for what seemed like hours, there’s no answer – so I leave a message. I try Mark’s phone, which provides the same frustrating result. This is strange! It is rare that they don’t answer their phones or not replying to texts. Prior to loosing dad, I wouldn’t have thought too much about this, but now I’m starting to feel concerned.
Finally scoffing down the breakfast James brought for me ages ago, I turn my attention to thoughts of moving into this cottage, which has fast become my home. As I look around the bedroom chewing on my toast, I realise that I have a list as long as the River Nile of things I need to do to create the homely feel I love. Quickly getting dressed, I race down the stairs to start discussing things with James. “Thanks for the breakfast in bed. When shall I start to move my stuff in – do you think?”
“That’s no problem. Well we could go to your flat and make a start packing today whilst we’re both off work. But we can leave it until after New Year if you prefer,” he answers whilst greasing his boots and I can’t help but notice that he’s already greased my new pair – let’s face it, I’d never have bothered.
“Let’s start now, so that I can think about where everything can go and what fabrics will work better with that window,” I reply, pointing to the living room curtains.
“What do you mean – fabric?” asks James looking slightly alarmed.
“Well if I’m moving in, it has to feel like home to me, too. I need my stuff around me and I seriously can’t live with those curtains. I’ve put up with them long enough!”
“What’s wrong with the curtains?”
“James – what’s right with them? The place just needs softening with a bit of femininity.”
“But no pink! I’m not having anything pink in here. Other than that, change the curtains if it makes you happy.”
“Great!” I reply, quite happy at how reasonable James has been over my suggestions – so far.
“But Lizzie...”
“Yes”
“Please don’t put all 38 soaps into my bathroom – find a cupboard or something for them.”
“38?”
“Yes I counted and there were 38, and I know as well as you do that not one of them will end up at The Tea Cosy,” he says rolling his eyes leaving me with the feeling that he knows me too well.
Later on, I hear a car slowly rolling up the track towards our cottage. Sorry, can I just stop my story for a second to pay attention to that detail – our cottage! I do understand that officially it is James’ cottage, but if I am to feel like it’s my home, I need to refer to it as ours.
After looking out of the window, I’m surprised to see Mark and Tabitha walking up the path crunching their way through the gravel. They never call without texting or calling first – strange. Suddenly I notice the reason straight away. You can’t miss it! Glinting delicately in the December sunshine, is the huge rock of a diamond on Tabitha’s finger and now it’s apparent why they’ve been so coy. “James–Mark and Tabitha are here and it looks as though they’re calling for their wedding planner,” I shout whilst quickly running to open the door, being greeted by a blast of icy air. “I knew you were up to something, but I didn’t know it would be so massive.” I say giddily whilst pointing at the ring. “Congratulations!”
“Oh Lizzie – I’ve been dying to tell you and when you texted about the wedding planner being in your bag by mistake – I thought you’d guess, so we thought we’d come over to tell you in person,” Tabitha gushes looking radiantly happy.
“We wanted to tell Mum first, but didn’t want to say anything to her until we’d got Christmas over with,” says Mark, whilst shaking James hand as he comes out to congratulate them.
“What did Mum say? Come inside, it’s freezing out here. I’ll stick the kettle on,” I say whilst ushering them all through the door to OUR cottage.
“She was pleased. In fact she smiled the first genuine smile I’ve seen since Dad died. Obviously she’d be happier if dad were here to celebrate, as we all would, but she did seem happy at the thought of helping Tabitha plan things.”
“Have you decided when and where yet?” I ask excitedly.
“We’re thinking of in the summer, but no definite plans yet,” answers Tabitha.
“Well we have a bit of news too,” I say and see Tabitha immediately glance at my wedding ring finger and noticing it free of a ring, she turns to my stomach. “Neither of those things Tabitha, I’m moving in with James. We are also completing item number nine on my list together. We’re off to Vancouver in April to see whales swim in the wild.”
“Wow, that’s great news!” answers Tabitha becoming child-like with all the excitement. “So Lizzie, you’ve completed eight tasks and you’re doing number nine in April – what about number ten? What’s number ten and when will you do it, because you only have until May?” As all eyes turn to me expectantly, but I know that I can never tell them what number ten is on my list or that I probably won’t achieve it – not before I’m 30 anyway.
“You’re going to have to wait a little longer to find out Tabitha – it’s still a secret.”
Task 10 – To get married
When I first started my list, I added this as number ten, knowing that I couldn’t possibly achieve this in a year, especially since I was single when I made my list. Perhaps I just thought I should get married, even though I’d never met a man I’d ever consider moving in with, let alone marry – until Mr Colley of course. At the time, lots of the things on my list seemed impossible, and I honestly didn’t think I’d accomplish half of them.
You know what? I would love to marry James one day and yes I’ve already admitted to you that the wedding is planned in my head – even many minor details. Having said all that, I feel more confident than I have ever felt in my life. My list has pushed me to my limits in many different ways and I know that I can reach goals if I put my mind to it.
Obviously losing Dad is something that will take me a long time to come to terms with, but if Dad taught me anything, it’s to take one day at a time and enjoy each and every day. If my list has taught me anything, it is that I am a capable woman and I can achieve what I want by myself. These life-lessons have changed my approach to number ten on my list. Yes, I do want to achieve number ten on my list, but not just to achieve a task on a list, but because I love James deeply, however – there’s no hurry. And after seeing the look on James’ face, when I mentioned hanging some more hearts up around the cottage, I think we need to work on moving in together first – one step at a time for him too!
After Tabitha and Mark left, James and I head to my flat, so that I can start to pack. It feels slightly strange to be leaving my little haven after many years of falling out of bed and into work on the same premises. The fact that I can no longer pop over to Ruth’s for a chat quite so easily suddenly dawns on me. Conflicting issues arise inside my head, with excited thoughts of moving in with James battling with melancholy thoughts about leaving my beloved flat. James must sense my apprehension. “Are you okay Lizzie – you’ve gone all quiet?”
“Yes I’m fine. It just seems strange that I won’t be living here anymore – that’s all,” I reply.
“You don’t have to move in with me if you’d rather stay here. I just thought that you spend so much time at the cottage – it makes sense.”
“You mean you only want me to move in for practical reasons?” I tease, but with a serious expression on my face.
“Yes–because you are at the cottage more and more, so you might as well move in with me. The cottage is bigger than the flat, so it makes more sense than my moving in with you. I want you to be with me when I go to bed every night and
wake up every morning, also and most importantly–because I love you!” James answers in a slight monotone way that he uses as if talking to a small child, until he sees me grin and realises that I am actually winding him up.
“In some ways it also solves another problem,” I add.
“What’s that?” James asks coming over to hug me.
“Well Laura has to travel to The Tea Cosy every day and she’s desperate to be closer, but can’t afford the rent on anything she’s looked at so far. Kate and I want to give her a pay rise because she’s flipping brilliant, but we can’t afford it yet. I could let her rent here very cheaply as an incentive for her to stay with us.”
“So the only reason you want to move in with me is for practical reasons, so that Laura can have your flat?” James replies holding a tissue to his eyes pretending to cry. I burst out laughing and throw a cushion at him, before we start filling bags with all of my stuff.
A few hours later when James is loading up his Land Rover, I pay Ruth a goodbye visit and say goodbye to our many evening chatting. “I’m just popping in to say goodbye to you Ruth.”
“Why where are you going?” she asks startled at my sad face.
“I’m moving in with James, but I’ll miss my flat and I’ll miss living next door to you, so wanted to say goodbye,” I blurt out.
“For goodness sake Lizzie – I thought you were moving to the moon or something, with the way you’re carrying on. Let me get this straight–you are moving one mile up the road with a kind and thoughtful man – not to mention good looking.” We hear a clearing of a throat in protest after she uses the words, good looking and I laugh as I realise Pete is in the living room. “You’ll be moving into a beautiful cottage, just like you’ve always dreamed of, with a man who loves you – why are you still here saying goodbye, Lizzie?”
“Okay, point taken!” I sniffle pathetically. “But, can I still visit you and are you both coming to the party on New Year’s Eve?”
“Yes and yes – now go and start making yourself at home and let that poor man get back to his home too – he must be freezing waiting for you outside in this weather. GO!” And I can’t help but smile at the voice of reason – if also the voice of bluntness.
Note to self
Keep item number ten to myself for a while. James was quite shocked when he saw how many kitchen utensils I had – moving in is definitely enough for now.
Call Laura about my flat.
Chapter 25
New Year
The following days are so busy that they fly by like the red arrows – with lots of noise and energy. James and I spend most of our time moving my belongings to the cottage and I’ve already commissioned Kate to make me some bunting for around the welsh dresser in a beautiful, duck-egg blue fabric that I’ve found. The cottage is already looking more homely after just a couple of days. James keeps protesting at various items, but I know he is teasing me, although he has now put a ban on any more hearts. Being fair to James, I have hung hearts from near enough every possible handle or hook in the place – even I’m beginning to think it’s all a bit too much.
We also spend a lot of time organising the New Year’s Eve party, which is growing by the day with more and more people coming. I’ve started organising the food, whilst James has been putting fairy lights all over the bushes and trees outside the main door, where we are going to have fireworks at midnight.
I am beginning to think that the party is a ingenious idea, as there are enough people coming to keep the party lively, but not too many that it will lose its intimacy. I want mum to be surrounded by people who’ll make her laugh. Although it will be hard for her – another first to get through–I think this is the perfect place for her to be. She is bringing some of her golden girls with her – a few wines and they’ll have everybody dancing. I’ve witnessed them under the influence of wine before, and it’s not to be missed!
Awaking early with the anticipation of the New Year’s Eve party happening tonight, I head downstairs quietly, not wanting to disturb James, aiming to surprise him with breakfast in bed. Although I’ve only officially lived here a few days, I already feel like it’s my home, but I still feel excited at the prospect of waking with him each morning. I’d be lying if I said we hadn’t had a few minor teething problems, like the fact that he likes to squeeze the toothpaste from the bottom of the tube, whereas I just hit any bulging point and go for it, much to his annoyance. He also has a habit of leaving his boots right outside the front door. Now I know many of you will be thinking that it’s brilliant that he bothers to takes them off, but not when he leaves them right in the doorway and I have fallen over them several times already. The bath bombs and heavily scented soaps are a problem for him. He hasn’t actually said anything, but I heard him muttering things about the bathroom smelling worse than a beauty parlour, whilst he was brushing his teeth yesterday. It really winds me up when he leaves his used mugs everywhere, especially when Jack likes to drink the remnants of what’s left in the bottom.
Finally, I never put lids back on jars properly–I’m not sure why – perhaps it’s because I get distracted when cooking. James has now had to change his tops on two occasions, due to spilling beetroot and olive juice down them when he has taken jars out of the fridge. Having said all this, we have fitted into our own routine already and keep smiling at each other in that blissful loved up way that is so sickening to watch if you’re on the outside, in a relationship past the honeymoon stage, or are single looking for love.
“James, wake up; I’ve got sausage sandwiches (or butties to you) here dripping with butter and brown sauce and some strong tea,” I say brightly, wanting him to wake so we can start the action of the day’s party preparations.
“Oh fantastic–I knew there was a good reason for me asking you to move in,” he cheekily says, whilst I threaten to eat his sandwich as well as mine holding it hoveringly close to my mouth. “Okay, it’s not just this – you do cook me fabulous meals and cakes.” I now take a bite from his sandwich. “Okay I love you and want you here all the time.” With the correct response from him, I offer him my sandwich, whilst I have eaten half of his in one bite. As you can tell, James is a man who enjoys his food. We greedily wolf down our sandwiches and cuddle up together whilst we sip our hot tea.
“What time shall we go to the Centre? If everybody is coming over from 3pm, I thought we should go after lunch.” I am about to continue discussing what jobs we need to finish, but James has other ideas.
“Let’s talk about that later Lizzie – we have far more important things to consider right now,” he says as he starts to kiss my neck. You know what? I think he might be right...
Much, much later, we arrive at the Centre laden with stuffed bags of various party paraphernalia, from champagne to balloons. We’ve also got clothes to change in to later as we’re going to stay over at the Centre as well, even though the cottage is not far away.
By 3.30pm, people start to arrive, ready for action. Everybody has voted to do the orienteering course in the dark first. To make it fair on people who haven’t done it before, Pete and James have changed the route. After this, everybody will need hot showers before changing for the evening–we’ve all decided to dress up.
Guests are bringing some sort of entertainment or party game, so it should keep things fun and busy. One of my aims is to keep Mum’s mind off Dad. We have, however, got lanterns to launch in his memory after the midnight celebrations. Dad would not have wanted us to sit and stop our lives, but I feel it’s important to keep his memory with us and not be afraid of including him in celebrations, for fear of too much emotion.
On arriving, people head towards their rooms to unpack and make their beds – there is no way I am going to make 22 beds, but I do however, make a big pots of tea and coffee to warm people up before we organise teams for the orienteering. James and Pete are staying behind as they know the new route and somebody n
eeds to time the teams. “Right we need five, teams of four!” shouts James.
“I’ll go with Lizzie!” shouts Tabitha now knowing about my map talents and is eager to be with me. I chuckle at Mark’s disgruntled face.
“No I’m going with Lizzie!” shouts Mum, whilst I quite enjoyed being in such demand.
Those who don’t know about my map reading talent, start to look a little baffled as to why I’m so popular. “Okay, since some of you know about Lizzie and her map reading abilities, I think I’ll pick teams for you,” shouts James. “Dad you’re going to give Lizzie a run for her money where maps are concerned, so you can be a team leader. Paul and Ian (who both work at the centre with James and have come for the party as well, but not to work) you can lead teams. They don’t know the new route, before anybody protests at that. Mark–I think a bit of sibling rivalry won’t hurt you, so you can lead the other team. Are you going to let her beat you again?” James then divides people into our teams. Tabitha does end up with me as does James’ mum, Elizabeth and also Ruth. Mum is in Mark’s teams and I realise that James has given the teams some thought, making sure that Mum is with our family and as Elizabeth and I are together we can get to know each other more.
“Lizzie–James’ dad is fantastic at this sort of thing – Mark told me on the way up. Is that right?” Tabitha asks Elizabeth.
“Well yes, we don’t stand a chance, if honest. John’s spent his life trawling along the Lancashire and Lakeland hills finding his way down with just a compass – how do you think James ended up doing this for a living?” Elizabeth gestures towards the centre.
For the moment I keep quiet and mentally ask dad if he’s ready, because we ARE going to win this. When Pete comes around with the map, I know I have an advantage having been in the section of the field near the bridge, but so do the centre team leaders, Paul and Ian. I study it quickly to look for the points and immediately see what they’ve done to make it difficult. The final point is under the bridge and needs to be collected first rather than last or we’ll end up crossing the field twice. I also note that point 15 is on the opposite side of the stream, but this is misleading on the map, so we need to stamp it at the same time, so we can cross the bridge.
Lizzie's List Page 18