by Addison Cole
“I don’t know, Evan. This isn’t a little thing. Vera could have had a heart attack. They could have hurt her in some other way. She’s stressed. She feels violated and unsafe in her own cottage. Jamie’s livid. His grandmother, the woman who raised him, was put in danger. Do you understand that?” He didn’t give him a chance to answer. “I’m not sure they’ll be receptive to talking to you just yet. They might need a few days to get past this.” Or a few weeks, or years. He had no idea if Jamie and Vera would ever get past it. He needed time to digest it.
“Please? I know all that, Dad. That’s why I need to talk to them,” Evan begged.
“I think that’s a good idea, Caden.” Chief Bassett held a steady gaze on Caden. “You’ll be there to buffer the situation. Unless you worry they’ll retaliate in some way, I think it’s important to give Evan a chance to make amends.”
“Yes, sir.” Caden realized that he hadn’t said no just because of his concerns of how Jamie and Vera might react, but also because he wasn’t ready to face Bella just yet.
“What will happen to David and Mike?” Evan asked.
Caden found it interesting that Evan wasn’t asking about what would happen to him. He must have truly come clean, which was honorable, even if he should have come to him sooner.
“Well, son, that’ll depend on how the investigation goes, and if Mrs. Reed presses charges. And, of course, if those other thefts are confirmed. If you don’t mind, I’d like a word with your father alone. You can wait right outside the door by Ms. Palken’s desk.” Chief Basset nodded a dismissal to Evan.
“Yes, sir.” Evan left the office, and Caden’s eyes tracked him through the glass until he disappeared in the direction of Kristie’s desk.
Chief Bassett leaned back in his chair. “That’s a pisser, huh?”
“That’s one way to put it.”
“You okay?” Chief Bassett asked.
“Yeah. Fine. Just, you know…When it’s your kid, all sorts of stuff goes through your head.” Like if we never moved, this wouldn’t have happened.
“Yes, I do know. Like, what if he had been involved? What if he’d been the one to break in?”
Caden rose to his feet. “Yeah.”
“Don’t be too hard on him, Caden. He did the right thing.”
“I know. Thanks, Chief.”
On the way out of the station, Evan apologized again.
“I know you’re sorry, Ev. You did the right thing by telling us. I just wish you would have come to me sooner, but in the end, you did the right thing, and I’m proud of you for that.”
Evan had been strong throughout the last few grueling hours. He hadn’t shed a tear since they left the boat, and he hadn’t lost his cool. Now, at his father’s words, his eyes dampened again.
“I didn’t mean to mess up so badly, Dad, but I swear to you that I didn’t have anything to do with any of the break-ins. I just wanted friends to hang out with, and then, when I realized what they were into, I didn’t really believe it at first—then I did…”
Caden pulled Evan into his arms. His thin frame shook within Caden’s stable embrace.
“I’m sorry, Dad. I’m so sorry.”
Caden cupped the back of his son’s head and held him close. He’d held him through scraped knees, broken fingers, and hurt feelings. He’d held him through tears shed over an absentee mother, and George’s death, which had sent them both crumpling to their knees. But this, holding Evan after watching him do what most adults wouldn’t have the courage to do—snitch on kids he’d have to face on a daily basis in the fall—this was powerful. Petrifying. This was why he needed to be there for Evan every minute he could.
On the way out of the parking lot, Evan asked to see Vera again.
“Evan, she’s had a terribly hard day. It’s seven o’clock. I think it might be better to wait until tomorrow.”
Evan pressed his palms to his thighs. “Please, Dad? I want to talk to them.”
“As I said, they may not be very receptive.”
“I know. That’s okay. You’ve always taught me to say I’m sorry, and I don’t want to wait to say it.” Evan’s eyes were hooded, tired, but his voice was determined.
Caden knew that Evan would stay up half the night thinking about it if he didn’t take him to see Vera now. He also knew that the longer he waited to talk to Bella, the more difficult it would be.
“Okay.”
The sun was beginning to set when they pulled into Seaside. Evan’s eyes jumped over each cottage on the way around the gravel drive.
“No one’s outside,” he said.
“It’s been a tough day.” Caden looked at Bella’s cottage and caught sight of a shadow through the window. His chest ached with the memory of being with her last night.
He parked by Vera’s cottage and told Evan to wait in the car so he could ask Jamie if it was okay for Evan to come in. He knew this wasn’t going to be easy for any of them, but Jamie had looked like Caden had felt earlier in the day when they were at the urgent care center—ready to tear someone’s head off. He couldn’t protect Evan from what he went through with those kids, but he could, and would, protect him from whatever else he was able to. Jamie had a right to be angry, but Caden hoped he’d be able to control his anger where Evan was concerned, at least until he heard him out.
Jamie answered the door with surprise in his eyes. “Caden.”
“Hi, Jamie. How’s Vera?”
“She’s okay. Would you like to see her?” He stepped to the side, and Caden saw Vera sitting on the couch, reading.
“Actually, Evan’s in the car, and he’d like to talk to both of you.”
Jamie furrowed his brow.
“Jamie, I tried to dissuade him, but he really wants to make amends. We’re just coming back from the police station. He didn’t have anything to do with any of this, and he feels horrible.”
“Jamie Joseph, you let that boy come in and say his piece,” Vera said from behind Jamie. “Hello, Caden. How are you, dear?” Vera peered around her grandson.
“We’ve seen better days. I’m truly sorry, Vera.”
“Yes, dear. You told me that at least a dozen times today, and I do appreciate it. You know I think I scared those boys as much as they scared me. They left as quickly as they came when they realized I was here. I think they expected the place to be empty. Please bring Evan inside. I’d like to speak to him.”
“Thank you, Vera.” Out of respect, Caden also deferred to Jamie. “Jamie?”
“Of course. Bring him in.” Jamie sat down on the couch.
Caden went to the car and leaned over Evan’s open window.
“They’ll see you, but, Evan, don’t expect this to be easy. No matter what they say to you, I expect you to remain respectful. Got it?”
“Yes. I know.” Evan stepped from the car. “I know this is my fault, Dad. I can handle it. I owe them an apology.” Evan followed him inside the cottage. He brushed his hair out of his eyes and stood before Vera, who had settled back onto the couch again.
Caden’s chest constricted as he watched the boy he’d raised stand up and act like a man.
“Sit down, Evan. Please,” Vera said.
Evan sat in a rocking chair beside the couch. He drew in a deep breath before turning his attention to Caden.
“Dad, can you please give us a minute?”
Caden was taken by surprise. “Are you sure?”
“Yes. Please?”
The confidence in Evan’s voice was another surprise. He had no idea what his son might say, but he left him to make amends and hoped for the best. He’d handled himself well with the chief, and Caden had a feeling he’d do just fine with Vera and Jamie, too. He walked out of the cottage and over to the grassy area behind Bella’s cottage. He couldn’t stay away. He heard dishes clanking inside, and as he neared her deck, Bella glanced out the window and their eyes met. Caden’s chest constricted as she came outside.
“Hi. How’s Evan?” She hooked her finger in the waist
of his shorts.
“He’s okay. He’s with Jamie and Vera.” Man, he loved her. He loved her generous heart, her thoughtfulness, the way she claimed him with one small finger in his waistband. She went up on her toes, and he met her halfway for a tender kiss. He took her hand in his and brought it to his lips. “Bella…” He heard the devastation in his own voice.
Her smile faded. “Caden? What is it?”
Don’t do it. Don’t say a word.
“Caden. You’re worrying me.” She searched his eyes.
“Bella, I think I need to take some time and focus on Evan.” Stop. Just stop before you screw this up. He hadn’t realized he had come to this resolution so definitively until the words left his lips.
“Of course. I assumed that’s why you hadn’t called.” She sighed. “You scared me. You looked so…” She searched his eyes. “Caden?”
“Babe.” He reached for her hand, and she pulled it away. “Look at what’s happened, Bella. Vera could have been hurt. Evan could have gotten into real trouble. If I were more focused on him, this might never have happened.”
“Wh-what are you saying?” Her lower lip trembled.
“Bella, you know what I’m saying. I need to focus on Evan and make sure he gets straightened out.” The pain in her eyes sliced through every fiber of his being.
“I don’t understand.” She lowered her voice, and a tear slid down her cheek.
He wiped the tear with the pad of his thumb and gritted his teeth against the sadness that snaked around his heart and squeezed so tight he could barely breathe. “I’m sorry, Bella,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry, but I’m obviously not very good at being a father and a boyfriend. I’ve failed Evan. I think we need to take a break.”
“I don’t need a break, Caden. You need a break. I want to be there for you and for Evan.” She crossed her arms and turned away. “I thought you were all about commitment.”
“I am. I always said that Evan was my top priority. I never hid that from you.” He touched her shoulder, and she pulled gently from his reach. “I’m sorry, Bella, but I think Evan needs me around right now.”
She turned to face him again with damp eyes. “So this is what you do? The going gets tough and you…end things?” Her shoulders rounded forward.
“That’s not a fair statement. The going gets tough and I…Come on, Bella, I think I’m doing the right thing for Evan. We’re adults; he’s a kid. He needs guidance and attention. I didn’t say I wanted to end things. I said take a break.” He didn’t even know what he meant. He wanted to be with her every second of every day. But he needed to be there for Evan and make sure he got back on the right path without feeling cast aside, and how on earth could he do that if his heart was drawing him out the door?
“I want you, Bella. I just—” He’d kept his eyes off of Evan for too long, and look what almost happened. He needed to remain strong. For Evan.
“Please don’t say any more.” She turned away again, and when she spoke, it was with the same compassionate tone that had reeled him in when he’d first gotten to know her.
“I understand, Caden. I really do. But please, just go. It’s too hard.”
He stood behind her, desperately wanting to wrap his arms around her and press his cheek to hers. He wanted to tell her everything would be okay, but how could he, when he first needed to make sure his son was okay?
He lifted his hands to touch her shoulders—to comfort himself as much as to comfort her—then he lowered them to his sides without ever touching her, feeling impotent and sad.
So, damn sad.
Chapter Twenty-Two
BELLA HAD BEEN lying on her bed staring up at the ceiling for hours, vacillating between thinking that Caden was doing the admirable and right thing and thinking about how the right thing felt horrible. Then guilt swallowed her whole for the latter thought. She’d pretended to be asleep when Jenna and Amy came over and peered into the bedroom. She’d ignored Jamie when he called through the bedroom window, and she’d ignored Pepper’s barking when she heard Leanna returning to her cottage and calling across the road to Amy, explaining that she’d forgotten something.
She tried to doze off. A laughable thought. She had a meeting with the school board in a few hours, and she wanted to be rested, but she couldn’t have slept if her life depended on it. She didn’t want to think or feel. She wanted to pretend today never happened.
Darn it.
She didn’t want to be this person, either. A woman who pined over a man who was only doing what was right for his child. A woman who pined over a man at all. She’d had a plan this summer. Her decisions were supposed to be made based on what she wanted, separate from any man or relationship.
What on earth?
Why did I cave?
When did that happen, exactly?
She caught sight of the bookmark Caden had given her and she groaned aloud. How was she supposed to just push aside her feelings for Caden—and Evan?
Forget this.
She tore off her clothes and wrapped herself in a towel, stomped to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of Middle Sister wine, slipped her feet into a pair of flip-flops, and left her cottage.
A break! A stupid break.
It was well after midnight and the lights in all the cottages were off. She went to Jenna’s bedroom window, put her mouth up to the screen and shielded it with her hands.
“Jenna,” she whispered loudly. “Jenna, get your butt up.”
She heard Jenna grumble in her sleep. “Jenna Ward, I need you.”
“Bella?”
Bella heard feet shuffling across the hardwood floor. Jenna’s face pressed against the screen.
“Are you okay?” Jenna asked in a sleepy voice.
“No. Chunky-dunking. Now.” She left no room for negotiation. “Hurry.”
Jenna’s face disappeared into the darkness. “We came by earlier,” Jenna said as she shuffled around the room. “You were zonked.”
“I was wallowing,” Bella said through the screen.
Jenna’s front door creaked open. She tiptoed across the grass in her towel and matching flip-flops. Her hair was pulled up on top of her head and secured with a plastic clip.
“Are you still upset over Vera and Evan?” Jenna looped her arms into Bella’s and wiggled her toes. “Like my nail polish? Amy’s are red. Mine are blue. We’ll paint yours tomorrow. You got stuck with white.”
“Nope. I’m not getting stuck with anything I don’t want.”
They walked across the quad and between Tony’s and Leanna’s cottages, then crossed the gravel road to Amy’s cottage.
“It’s just nail polish. What were you wallowing over?” Jenna asked as they went around Amy’s cottage to her bedroom window. “Jamie said Evan apologized and explained everything to them. Apparently, he shed a few tears, too. Poor kid. Being a teenager is so hard.”
“Ames,” Bella called through the screen. “Amy! Get your skinny butt up.”
“What?” Amy pressed her nose to the screen and shielded her eyes, peering down at them. “Chunky-dunking? Oh goody! Hold on!”
They made their way down the gravel road, taking swigs of wine and passing the bottle from one to the next.
“Bella wasn’t sleeping when we went over; she was wallowing,” Jenna explained as she fumbled with the lock on the pool gate. The heavy chain clanked against the metal pole.
“Shh. Do you want to wake Theresa?” Bella grabbed the chain and held it still while Jenna inserted the key into the lock. “I’m wallowing because Caden said he needed a freaking break.”
Amy and Jenna gasped in unison.
“Tell me about it.” Bella closed the gate behind them. “We’ll talk after we’re in the water. I need to clear my head.” She and Amy walked to the far end of the pool by the stairs while Jenna dropped her towel on a table by the gate and hurried from one end of the pool to the other, nude, with her mammoth, bright white breasts swaying from side to side.
“Jenna!” Bell
a whispered. “Sheesh, woman.”
“Why does she always leave her towel up there?” Amy asked.
“Who knows. It’s probably an OCD thing.” Bella watched Jenna tiptoe onto the first step and lift her feet in quick succession, sucking in air between her teeth.
“Chilly. Chilly. Chilly chipples.” Jenna laughed.
Bella set the bottle of wine on the table and draped her towel over a chair, then walked down the steps, passing Jenna, and went shoulder deep into the cool water. “Boy did I need this. Just get under, Jen. I swear your boobs are like headlights. Get in before you wake Theresa and we all get in trouble.”
“Okay, okay.” Jenna spoke in a harsh whisper, as was their practice when they chunky-dunked. She went down one more step; then she went back up to the top step again with her fingers daintily spread out to her sides. “Cold. Cold. Cold.”
Amy put her towel on the chair and crossed her arms over her small breasts. “Come on, Jenna. We’ll go in together.” She took Jenna’s hand and they both sucked in air as they descended the steps and finally sank up to their chins in the water.
“Brr.” Amy crossed her arms over her chest. “I don’t remember it being this cold.”
“It always is,” Jenna said.
“It’s not that cold, wussy girls.” Bella dove under the water and swam like a dolphin to the far end of the pool. Jenna and Amy sidestroked across the pool.
“Bella, spill the beans. What the heck happened? I thought you and Caden were fine. More than fine.” Amy held on to the side of the pool and reached for Jenna’s hand, then pulled her over. They were in the deep end, and in the dark, the water beneath them looked pitch-black.
Bella kicked her feet to stay afloat and to stay warm. Her body was so cold her limbs were shaking, though she’d never admit it after giving them a hard time.