Then I think about my gramps, León, I know he never stepped out on my abuelita. Even though I never met the dude, I’d heard about how he had mad love and respect for his wife. That’s the way this shit was supposed to go down with me and Rocky. In the past, lil’ mama has always got on me, with her insecurities about me teaching. Rockwell always meant more to me than the next piece of pussy. She has always been my everything.
I look up at the gleaming chandelier, with feather pillows behind my head wondering why the fuck I’m here?
Every time I consider going home, I know Rockwell’s going to wanna talk it out. Be about my feelings. She don’t need to see me like this.
Just like tonight, every night, I lay on Janyca’s super soft bed and listen to Rocky’s latest voicemail, begging to see me. Rocky’s little voice will have me feeling some type of way. It almost makes me regret going back for my good girl. Rockwell ain’t the type to live that life. Nah, she was meant for beautiful diamonds and designer things, to be treated like the treasure that she is. But in this world? My grinding for my tio’s cartel. I rub my eyes, knowing for certain that it crosses my girl’s mind too.
I was fucking dead when I pulled the trigger on those Colombianos down the hill while looking for Toi. I’d bodied young and old just the same, didn’t give a fuck. But just the notion of my baby mama, my muthafuckin’ everything having the same fate as Toi…
I can hear Janyca getting in the shower, as I pull out my cellphone. Today as I listen to Rockwell’s new message, I call her ass back for the first time in a week.
“So it's like that ma?” I sit up and ask soon as she answers.
“Renzo, bae, you used to come to me when shit went south. I would hold–”
I cut her ass off. Man, I remember those times. I didn’t give a fuck about her parents walking in on us. But I’d just need lil’ mama by my side when we were young. I take flight on her ass, saying, “So you finna fucking compare me to your uncle Marcel? I’m one of those womanizers that fucks other hoes–?”
“Renzo, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like–”
“So I bring bitches to your bed, don’t care for home? I put fucking hands on you and shit? Huh Rocky! That’s the kinda nigga you with?”
“Lorenzo,” she begins in a sigh.
“That's what the fuck you just said, Rocky!” I repeat her message verbatim, “Nigga you been gone for five days. Are you with some bitch like my uncle Marcel…”
“Bae, we’re all just emotional right now. Renzo, just come home.”
“Nah ma. I was getting ready to come home today, but ya mouth got ahead of you as usual.” I hang up on Rockwell before she can say anything else.
Damn, I just made something out of nothing when I’m the one doing her foul. I don’t feel like seeing my woman. I don’t want to slip up and see that look in her eyes as if Rockwell is wondering how life wouda been if she continued to ignore me that one day when she was twelve. Then again, Rocky always has this look like I can do everything. Can’t go back to see it all has changed. After almost letting Blu down when she got kidnapped.
Toi…
My mind won’t even allow me to go there. Those three dudes deaths could never vindicate my little sister.
Janyca comes into the room, in a short silk robe. As if this bitch doesn’t see the look on my face, and how I want her to get the hell on, Janyca sits Indian style at the edge of the bed. “You want a back rub?”
“Nope.”
She starts to climb closer to me.
And I wave her ass away. “Not now Janyca.”
“Why not now?” she snaps.
“The fuck is yo’ problem?” I get up from the bed. Now, Janyca and I are always about our business. I been chilling here because lil’ mama can cook and clear my mind when needed. But evidently the bitch has gotten confused.
“You don’t want to talk?”
“We chopped it up about the next shipment already,” I say, putting on my boots. Janyca has been good to me when keeping my mind on the grind. But this bitch has me confused.
“Do you think I’m here just to talk about ICE, and how to get some fucking drugs into the states? I’m a fucking trust fund baby,” she waves her hands in the air, “Look at all this stuff. I do favors and act like your secretary when you need, but that’s because I wanna be with you! Now last night you made love to me. We’ve been working on us–”
“What the fuck you mean we’ve been working on us, Janyca?” I shout as she follows me down the stairs of her home.
“This past week, since Toi’s death. Who’s been here holding you down? Cooking your meals? Loving on you?”
The fuck it look like me arguing with this bird? If it wasn’t business, I barely say a few words to Janyca this whole time. I grab my keys and head toward the door. Yet, this trick keeps popping off at the mouth. So I shut that shit up with a quick question.
“Janyca, you got my shit?” I ask.
“Fuck your shit, Lorenzo! I had an abortion for you! You set me aside soon as you and that married woman got good again! But I thought, just this week we’ve been working on us?” She comes up to me, eyes pleading, like a broken record. “So fuck your shit, if I don’t mean nothing to you.”
“Nah.” I grab Janyca’s cheeks so her mouth clamps shut. “The fuck you mean ‘fuck my shit?’ Bitch you sitting on a million dollars that belong to me. The fuck I care if you had it made before coming on board. Think! What your daddy’s inheritance had you laced with couldn’t touch me. Bitch, I could shit on your little trust fund! Is that’s what you want? Tryna get what you want will get yo’ little ass dead. I don’t do games.” The look in my eyes tell Janyca that I don’t want her ass either, but I speak the words just so she understands.
“O-okay, okay, your stuff… it–it’s on the way…” Janyca stutters.
I know I made a mistake with this bitch. This week has been a whole string of fucking mistakes. At least I wore a condom this time. Now it’s time to go home and be a man about my shit.
Chapter 84
POPEYE
Its two am when somebody comes banging on the guest bedroom door. I’m wishing I had carried Blu crazy ass over to our crib when Rocky just barges in.
“Where the fuck is my nigga?” Rocky asks.
“Ma, Rockwell it’s too late for that.” I whisper harshly, but Rockwell is loud as fuck and Blu is already stirring awake. That damn Benadryl, I knew we shoulda forced my wife to take a little more.
“Please… I need to talk to Lorenzo now. He ain’t answering his phone.” Rockwell’s eyes get all watery and I turn away. Since we were kids, I couldn’t take Rocky’s waterworks. It got every nigga in the hood.
“What’s wrong?” Blu yawns, stretching.
“Lorenzo’s mad at me. I said some stupid shit. He’s at some bitch house, I know her name is Janyca. She’s the one that always calls the most.” Rockwell looks back at me with narrowed eyes. “This nigga knows where she lives!”
Damn, I’m getting put on blast like that?
“Bae, where the fuck does this hoe live?” Blu snaps, instantly wide awake. She starts going off, saying all kindsa shit–in Spanish as usual murder is the only thing I understand. Man… this is all bad.
Like a bitch, I give up Lorenzo’s location.
Blu follows Rockwell out, talking smack and then comes back to the bedroom all smiles.
“Nigga, are you schizophrenic or something?” I rub my eyes. Blu is the first one to wanna bust a dude’s balls when dealing with another female. So why she all giddy?
“Nope.”
“You better tell me why you went from 100 to all calm and mellow?”
Blu chuckles–I’m guessing an inside joke, then says, “I just gave Rocky my gat.”
“Nigga what?” I glare.
“Don't worry–”
“Girl, have you lost ya mind. Rockwell wasn't even in the right mind to be going to confront that nigga and another bitch, no less. So you handed her a gun? Wow. Smoker move
.”
Blu's mouth drops.
I try to chuckle it off. See now I just put my foot in my own mouth. “Pretty Blu you know what I mean.”
“Yeah...”
Damn, I hope she wasn’t thinking smoking crack. So I elaborate, “Smoker. Weed head...”
“Crackhead?” Blu folds her arms.
“See that's why I'm a nigga of a few words.” We climb back in bed. “Look, I'm just saying, Rockwell might strong arm her way inside Janyca’s place–”
“That bitch can get bodied. That’s exactly what I told Rocky to do!” Blu smirks,
“And if lil’ Fly Misses shoots Lorenzo?”
“Then the nigga gets what he deserves. She ain't gon’ kill him, I know. Maybe his bitch and then shoot him in the leg or something. I can live with that.”
Blu lays back like that’s final. Damn my lady is a beast.
Chapter 85
ROCKWELL.
“Chuey... Please, please come quick.” I'm still shaking. I had just called Lorenzo but he didn't answer. Blu and Popeye wouldn’t answer either. I know Rita turned her phone off after we had last minute discussions about Toi’s funeral.
But Chuey always answers me.
Outside of a mini mansion, with modern decal, I pace back and forth next to my Jaguar. Almost died coming up here to bang on a hoe named Janyca I never even seen before, now I'm stuck in a situation. I think to bite my fingernails, but the silk wrap is too pretty. I start panting and panting, can’t breathe.
It's dark as fuck. Insects are chirping and creepy crawlers feel super close. It takes about 10 minutes when I hear the exhausts of another car. Somebody is coming! That makes fire light under my ass as I hide behind my trunk. Then I see Chuey’s Range, and scramble to my feet.
He gets out and comes up to me, kissing my forehead before I can push him away. Now I hadn't anticipated ever messing with this nigga again, but I need this favor. Besides, my entire body is shaking, reaction time next to nonexistent.
“You cold?” Chuey asks, starting to undo his blazer.
“No,” I pull away. Don’t need the chivalry.
“Damn, mommi,” he sighs, still taking it off. My body shakes as Chuey wraps it around me. Inside its warm and the masculine scent of Chuey is pleasing.
He rubs my face. “What the fuck have you done, baby? Whatchu doing around here?”
“I... I didn't do anything.” My eyes dart away.
“Rocky, baby. You called me,” he says as if doing so means everything to him. So I pull the gun out of my purse and somehow it doesn’t drop as my trembling hands place it into his.
“What you do, mommi?” Chuey caresses my cheek again, planting more soft kisses on my face and lips–taking advantage of my situation.
“Janyca, she’s …dead.”
“Lorenzo?” he asks. I shake my head. “You?”
“No,” I quickly shake my head no again, really needing him to understand.
“Rocky, if Lorenzo didn’t, then did you murder Janyca?”
Biting my lip, I nod slowly.
Chuey looks at the villa and then back at me. “Mommi, no, damn...” He puts his hands on top of his head.
“I’m sorry….”
“You’re not even a fucking visitor to this country. Murdering a citizen will get you no less than the death penalty out here, ma.”
“Then you should…” It pains me to say it but I do, “Place her somewhere.”
“The bitch ain’t fucking sleeping, she’s dead.” Chuey comes closer to me, this time not kissing but looking just as mean as my Lorenzo at times. Even though I’m afraid, I look up at him. Chuey huffs and adds, “So you want me to drop this hoe in some fucking ditch.” He then wipes his hands, and continues, “Get rid of her?”
“Kinda…yeah…please…” I burst into tears, knowing this is so very bad. “Aren’t you my friend?”
“Rocky, you didn’t murder some random, baby. You came to Colombia illegally, with no passport. Now, you’re running around murdering…” he begins to mumble under his breath.
“Chuey...” My chest heaves as I continue to cry; now I’m wishing he would just tell me it’s going to be okay. Chuey starts toward the house, with a purpose that I don’t know, especially when he just scared me about going to jail.
“But Janyca told me that Lorenzo and her was about to get married. She said she was pregnant and that... Chuey I... I… didn’t mean it…” I stop just at the threshold of this immaculate crib and assume that my nigga has really been taking care of this bitch. Lorenzo was getting ready to lace this bitch with an engagement ring! Chuey just made her sound so muthafuckin’ relevant when he talked about me being an illegal resident. There’s art and designer couches and vases, I know my nigga has set her up well. That has me almost as angry as I was when pulling the trigger.
“Where is the bitch?” Chuey asks.
I take a deep breath, and the fear of killing Janyca is back. Jealousy gone. I step inside the living room with crystal and white and chrome fixtures that I would love if I didn’t have children. This is a romantic ass pad. But I love my kids. I know Lorenzo does too, but I’m sure living here with Janyca for a week has been good.
Wiping away the tears, I look at Chuey then again at all the stuff, while standing on a bear fur rug. Janyca had been bragging soon as I came to the door. Unlike Olivia who had been so humble, so embarrassed, Janyca told me all about how much Lorenzo loved her. How she was finna have his baby and that they were getting married. This bitch had me at a loss for words. “Janyca bragged and told me about her engagement ring, Chuey. She just invited me in. First I thought Lorenzo was here, but no. Then she just started pointing out stuff–the couch cost a 100 Gs!”
“Rocky, where is this bitch?” Chuey asks, still not caring about what I have to say.
“But Chuey, Janyca was going to show me her TWELVE CARAT diamond engagement ring that Lorenzo got her! She was being mean–”
“Rocky, ma, I know you’re feeling some type of way for murking ol’ girl. Where is her body?” Chuey asks again. I know he can just look around and find her but he acting like he wants me to point the bitch out.
I fold my arms and start down the hall, with him beside me. “How could Lorenzo get her an engagement ring? She said it was worth over a million dollars. I didn't believe it. We were arguing and I followed her to the kitchen. Chuey. I didn’t believe her. Janyca picked up this velvet box. Tacori! I ain’t stupid. I knew that if Lorenzo had gotten her a real nice ring, he loved her. Before she could open it, and turn around…” I begin sobbing again. Seeing the smug look on Janyca’s face as she grabbed the box off the glossy white counter. As she twirled around the gun was already in my hand. Then her stomach–her baby–was soaking wet with blood.
“You shot this pregnant bitch in the belly?” Chuey shakes his head.
“I wasn't going to kill her. Besides, Janyca said she was a few months along… not that pregnant, Chuey,” I try to play it down. “She just kept telling me that they were happy. She taunted me, Chuey.”
He starts pacing around, can’t even look at me. “You are so muthafuckin’ stupid Rocky. Over this nigga? You ain't no damn murderer. Now you on for double homicide, if this bitch is pregnant.”
“I wasn't trying to. Please understand.”
Chapter 86
CHUEY
I’m digging in on lil’ mama and I know. Maybe Janyca ass wasn’t even pregnant. Lorenzo made her ass get an abortion months back, so I know he was meticulous when fucking this bitch again–if he did fuck her spoiled ass. But I’m fucking pissed that Rockwell would do such a thing. Murking muthafucka’s ain’t Rockwell’s style. She’s always been a good girl. Rocky is letting Lorenzo change her, and I don’t like that.
With a hard look, I ask, “So how it feel to kill that bitch?”
She shrugs. I touch Rocky's cheek and her hazel eyes finally look up to me. Minutes ago I couldn’t even look at her, but I get lost into this girl’s eyes, loving her so damn much.
I've been so damn angry for days. Rocky's been avoiding me. Now when shit goes wrong she wants my help?
Her tiny voice, and the words I’ve been waiting to hear seem to come out of nowhere as Rocky asks, “Chuey, aren’t you going to help me?”
I start to kiss the tears streaming down her cheek.
“You love me?” I ask. Something in me has the feeling that Rockwell just needs me. That’s it. She ain't ever said it before. But she looks so muthafuckin’ beautiful, right at this moment, while nodding. I grab the collar of my blazer that she looks so little wearing, and pull her closer to tongue her down real good. I'm a fucking simp when it comes to this trick. She starts pulling up my shirt and licking on my neck.
Alternating from kissing, licking and sucking on the pulse of my neck, Rocky asks, “Bae, you gon’ help me?”
“Nah. You stupid. You ain't no fucking murderer, ma. Tell me you’re done with Lorenzo then I’ll help.”
“Chuey,” she says so softly, her tongue swirling in my ear. “You care about me, don’t you?”
“Yeah, girl. But you’re the one doing dumb shit just to keep a nigga that do not want you. Shit, maybe Lorenzo will do you like you just did his bitch, since he planned on marrying that hoe,” I reply. Nah, Lorenzo wasn’t finna marry Janyca. She was a fucking secretary and probably ordered the ring for him. But I’m sure he’s gon’ be heated when finding out the key to the city is dead. This bitch is the key to moving all his shit and Santi’s. Before she even fucked with Lorenzo, Janyca was on Santiago’s payroll. As if she needed to be, the bitch’s family is made of that clean money. They ain’t finna take the fact that Janyca just disappeared into thin air. So getting rid of this body won’t be easy. Rocky looks ready to pay for the service tho.
“Now you want me, huh, Rocky?” I grab her face harshly, mad that I have to get rid of Janyca, and keep this girl safe from my father and Janyca’s father…
She bites her plush bottom lip. It makes my dick stand to attention. Rocky says, “I just need your help, Chuey.”
“Rocky, ma, you ain’t this type. You don’t run around bodying bitches for fucking a nigga. You’re too good for this. You deserve better–”
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