DELUDE

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DELUDE Page 10

by Jacob Chance


  She returns to their table where she proceeds to feel his bicep up and falls all over him. Maybe I need to put the fear of God in this dude and remind him to stay away from my girl.

  When she pushes her chair back and rises, I straighten up. She walks toward the back of the club and I follow. Keeping my hands in my pockets and my shoulders rolled forward, I try to appear unassuming, but I know there’s nothing unassuming about my appearance. I can feel the hungry eyes of all the women burning into me as I follow the only one I’m interested in.

  I play the part of her invisible guard dog for the rest of the night, her safety the most important thing to me. Once I see her safely getting in a cab with Derek and Kenna, I head toward my own vehicle.

  My cock and I have plans for the rest of the night to help me work out this anger.

  Listening at the door to my apartment, I wait for the sounds of Lana’s high heels tapping up the stairs. Opening the door, I wait like a predator, for her to appear. Anger is still coursing through my veins and there’s only one way to settle myself down.

  I hear her singing some unrecognizable song before she reaches the top of the staircase. She doesn’t notice me nonchalantly leaning against the door jamb, arms crossed over my chest.

  “Lana,” I call her name.

  Startled by my deep voice, she spins around to face me. “Zack, you scared me,” she says, hand on her chest.

  Using my shoulder, I push off the woodwork and slowly stalk toward her. I’m the hunter, her pussy my prey. I’m going to make her forget her own name by the end of the night.

  “Did you have fun tonight?” I ask, my voice deceptively calm.

  She smiles. “I did. I always have a great time with my friends.”

  I stop in front of her, raising her chin up with my fingers. “Tonight, you’re mine,” I growl. “Every fucking inch of you is mine and I’m not taking no for an answer.” I slam my lips down on hers, picking her up in my arms. Pressing her back into the hallway wall, I grind against her center while our tongues tangle.

  She moans digging her fingers into my shoulders. The bite of her nails through my shirt turns me on. My lips move down to suck on her neck and bite the fragile skin below her jaw.

  “I want you,” she whispers between gasps.

  The blood races through my veins, my heart pounds erratically, and it’s all I can do to keep it together long enough to carry her inside my apartment. I kick the door closed behind us and move toward my room, only one thing on my mind.

  I have a surprise for her. I’ve been waiting for the right time to introduce her to the door swing bondage restraints I purchased.

  I flip the overhead light switch as we enter through the doorway. I want to see everything I’m going to do to her. I slam the door shut behind us and let her slide down the front of my body. Her eyes get wide when she takes in the sight of the swing on the back of my bedroom door.

  I smirk. “Do you like that, angel? It’s all for you.”

  Impatient, I tug on the bottom of her dress and lift it up until it slides over her head. My breath leaves me when I find her completely naked underneath.

  “Why are you naked underneath your dress?” I angrily spit out the question.

  “I was planning on coming over here once I got home.”

  Her answer sends a punch of need to my gut and I hungrily take her lips, my hands roaming all over her soft skin. My hand slides down over the curve of her ass and slips forward to find her pussy soaking wet. I groan and slip two fingers inside her. She wraps a leg around my hip and rocks against my hand.

  “Oh no, Lana. I have better things planned for you.” I scoop her up, pressing her back against the door as I adjust the black straps of the door swing around her thighs. She grabs the loops for her hands, while I back away for a moment. I take in the sight of her suspended in the air, the black straps holding her legs wide open, exposing her wet, pink, pussy to me. Dropping to my knees, I’m on her in a flash, my mouth feasts on as much of her slick cunt as I can.

  “Zack,” she cries out my name when my tongue teases her clit and she shrieks when I suck it between my lips, gently raking my teeth over it. I undo my pants, pushing them open and down my hips, exposing my steel hard length as I lick up her juices. Fisting my cock, I stroke up and down as my lips and tongue continue their journey over every part of her pussy.

  “Do you want my cock?”

  “Yes,” she moans.

  “Tell me it’s the only cock you want,” I order.

  “It’s the...only one I... want,” she cries out as I suck on her clit, my tongue lashing back and forth over it.

  Her words have me ready to explode. I rise, my pants hanging off my hips and line my cock up with her pussy. Sliding it back and forth along her slit, my teeth gnash with need.

  “This pussy is mine,” I growl, thrusting inside her. Her legs tremble and she comes with a long moan.

  I hold still as the tremors of her orgasm squeeze my dick. She feels so incredible I can barely hold my own release off. My hands grip her hips for leverage as I start to move. The wooden door shakes from the force as I pound her pussy with my cock. “Don’t.” I slam into her. “Ever.” I go deeper. “Fucking forget.” I shout the last word as I come inside her sweet, tight cunt. I want to stay inside of her forever.

  Waking with Lana in my arms is a first for me. Not just a first with Lana. I haven’t spent the whole night with a woman before. I haven’t been in a relationship since high school. From college on, I fucked random women - women who knew the score. When I lived in New York, I belonged to a club where all my sexual appetites could be met. I haven’t searched for a new one since I moved here, and now I’m hoping Lana will be accepting of all my sexual tastes. I smile. My precious angel did well last night.

  Glancing down at the plethora of red marks I left on her breasts and neck, I experience a surge of pride at how well she handled everything better than I imagined. I know some of what we did she’s never experienced before. At least she didn’t sneak out in the middle of the night. I’m going to take that as a good sign.

  My fingers tenderly brush her hair back from her face. She’s breathtaking; literally. Sometimes, when I look at her my chest will tighten, my breathing will pause, I’m so overcome with all the love I feel for her. I have an overwhelming urge to protect her.

  Who’s going to protect her from me?

  I’m more of a danger to her than anyone out there could ever be. I’m not a good person and she deserves so much better. I’ve done horrible things - things I would be locked up for if people knew I was still alive. There are so many facets to me she doesn’t know; so many secrets I’ll have to reveal for us to truly be together.

  Once she knows who I really am, and all I’ve done, she might never want to see me again. The odds are certainly stacked against us and often seem insurmountable. But I’m going to fight like a motherfucker to keep her. I’m a selfish enough bastard to think of myself first. I want her. I need her. But there is no way in hell I’ll ever deserve her.

  I can console myself by thinking about how good things happen to bad people all the time. Karma doesn’t exist. It’s a made-up idea people believe in to fool themselves into thinking everyone’s held accountable for their actions.

  I’m not fooling myself by thinking I’m a completely changed man. I know I’m wired different than most. I’m working on being a better person for Lana; maybe it’s enough.

  For now, she’s here in my arms and it’s all that matters in this moment.

  Watching Lana’s eyelids slowly flutter as she stirs has my complete focus. I need to know what color her eyes are first thing in the morning after a night spent with me.

  When her eyes open wide, she doesn’t shy away from my gaze. She meets it with a small smile on her alluring lips. Blue. Her eyes are blue this morning. My dick goes hard. I’ve never seen her eyes this color before. I’m conceited enough to imagine it’s related to the numerous orgasms I wrung out of her with my tongu
e and my cock.

  “Good morning.” I smile. My head is propped up on my hand, elbow on the mattress as I look down at her. Her dark red hair is fanned out on the white pillowcase. The sheet barely covers the tips of her breasts. She turns to her side, facing me with one hand under her cheek, the other, holding the sheet in place.

  “Good morning.” She smiles, her cheeks flushing pink. I can tell she’s thinking about everything we did last night. I can see it in her eyes. I want to tear the sheet off her and show her how great morning sex is, but I don’t want to overdo it. I was rough with her last night.

  I caress her cheek with the back of my fingers. “We’re really going to do this?” I question as a wave of doubt washes over me. What if she changed her mind?

  She slowly nods her head. “Yes,” she whispers, then rubs her lips together.

  Overcome with happiness, I grab her and pull her on top of me. I squeeze my arms tight around her and bury my face in the curve of her neck.

  “You just made me the happiest I’ve ever been,” I say, my lips against her neck, my tone gruff.

  Her hands move up to sensually run through my hair. My eyes close. I wish we were in our own safe zone where reality could never come crashing in to destroy what we’re building. I never want this moment to end.

  She glances down at me, her face flushed as she slides her wet pussy back and forth along my cock. It’s nice to know she’s as affected by me as I am by her. I’ve been hard as a fucking rock for the past thirty minutes. I groan when she raises up to her knees and lowers herself down sheathing me inside her tight cunt.

  My hands grip her hips, fingers digging into her fair skin. “Ride me slow, angel.” I hiss between clenched teeth. The sight of her astride me, her hips rocking and rolling into me has me ready to burst.

  When her hands move up to cup her breasts and pinch her nipples, I almost lose it. “Fuck,” I grit between clenched teeth. I slide one hand down to rub her clit. She moans and drops her head back. Watching her lose herself in this moment is overwhelming. She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen with her back arched and her lips parted, deriving pleasure from my cock.

  My fingers work her clit, circling around, and rubbing as her hips rock faster, driving us both closer and closer to release.

  My hips thrust up to meet her downward motions, my free hand caresses up her spine before sliding in her hair to clutch the base of her head. When I tug on her hair, pulling her head back she gasps.

  “Do you like that? You like a little pain, angel?” I ask. I love the way she reacts to my touch.

  “Yes.” Her voice is husky. Her eyes are lazy, passion filled half slits.

  I tug on her clit, pinching and pulling it between my thumb and index finger. She moans.

  “I know what you need.” My hand releases her head and slips along her neck to wrap around her shoulder. I pull her down as I thrust upward as hard as I can. “Come for me, angel. I want to watch you come all over my cock.”

  Her fingernails dig into my chest as her pussy clenches. Her mouth falls open.

  “Zack,” she moans.

  “Look at me,” I order, needing to see her eyes. Blue.

  I thrust as deep as I can, releasing inside her tight pussy.

  The orange juice is sweet on my taste buds, but not as sweet as the girl sitting across from me. Nothing tastes as sweet as her pussy does. I smirk and set my glass down on the table six inches to the left of my plate. It’s a habit from when I was a kid. I can remember spilling my drink at dinner and my father beating my ass because of it. I finally figured out if I kept my drink far enough away from my plate I wouldn’t knock it over anymore.

  “What are you so smiley about?” Lana asks.

  I reach across the table and take her hand in mine. “I’m just happy you’re here with me and you’re giving us a shot.”

  The waitress interrupts, placing our plates down in front of us.

  “Thank you,” Lana murmurs and then takes a bite of her eggs.

  “How’s your work going?” I ask.

  “I love working at K.D. Investigations. Kyle and Derek are both great guys and easy to work for.”

  “What’s your favorite thing about what you do?” I spear some pancake on my fork and drag it through the maple syrup.

  “The best thing I’ve worked on so far was helping a long-lost brother and sister reunite. They hadn’t seen each other in fifteen years. It was really emotional and touching.”

  “I’ve never done anything really amazing like that. My work wasn’t satisfying on a personal level. It was satisfying on a monetary level. Someday, I’d like to know what it feels like to do something selfless.” I run my hand through my hair. “I just don’t know if I’ll ever be that kind of guy.” I glance at Lana and find her watching me. “I want to be though.”

  That’s as close to baring my soul as I’ve ever gotten. I hope she sees it for what it is.

  “I think you’re in a great place in your life. You can do whatever you want, and you don’t have to settle on one thing right now,” she reassures me. “Tell me about your family,” she says taking me by surprise.

  I don’t want to talk about my family, but I know I can’t avoid it forever.

  “My father wasn’t a good man. He was abusive to my mother and me. My mom got the brunt of it. I don’t remember a time when he wasn’t mean.” My eyes flick to Lana’s. She’s listening, no judgement on her face. “I use to get woken up at night by the sounds of him hitting her. He would say horrible things. Call her a whore.” I grimace. “Tell her he might as well sell her to strangers for some money because then at least she’d be earning her keep.” I push my fingers through my hair. “I’ve never told anyone this before.” My voice wavers. “I don’t like to talk about it.”

  She places her hand over mine. One simple touch from her gives me the courage to continue.

  “I used to lie in my bed, listening to the sounds of them fighting and just pray over and over he would stop. And then I would pray he wouldn’t come in my room and start in on me.” I pinch the bridge of my nose. “I’d feel so guilty for hiding in my room when I should have been defending my mother.” Just thinking about my father has me breaking out in a cold sweat. I swipe my forearm over my forehead. “He didn’t hit me until I was older. He used to do other things to punish me.” My eyes lower to our hands. Her skin is so fair next to mine, unmarred and delicate. She’s the opposite of me in every way.

  “He would burn me with a cigar.” I rake my teeth over my bottom lip and slide my free hand into the waistband of my jeans. I trace my index finger around the numerous uneven circular shapes spread out over my lower back and hips. I have them on the other side too. “He would press so hard the nerve endings were burned away. He always put them somewhere no one would notice.”

  Glancing up at Lana I notice the sheen of tears in her eyes. She remains silent, squeezing my hand in encouragement.

  “When I would go to the doctor for my yearly physical, I would wait in fear that he would discover them, but he never did.” I shake my head. “And the scar count continued to rise.” My voice breaks on the last word. I pull my hand away from the reminders of my father. I hate him for marking my body and my soul. I grab the orange juice from the table. The liquid sloshes around inside the glass as my hand shakes. I gulp the drink, swallowing the remainder, before placing the empty glass down.

  Clearing my throat, I then continue. “I can remember being torn between wanting him to find the scars so someone would stop the abuse and being scared if they did, my sister and I would be taken from our mother.”

  “Oh, Zack,” Lana whispers. I can feel her eyes on me, but I can’t look at her. If I do, I’ll crack like the pavement after a harsh Boston winter. I’m barely holding it together. Years of unshed tears and buried emotions are clawing to the surface like an ice dam, ready to bust through. I can’t let them out. Closing my eyes, I breathe deeply and push back all the darkness. It’s part of me and always will
be.

  Opening my eyes, I turn to Lana and smile. “Everything that happened led me to you.”

  We both settle into a comfortable silence, enjoying our meal. Watching her is quickly becoming my favorite pastime. The way she uses her napkin to carefully wipe her mouth after every bite is an adorable quirk of hers. I noticed it the night we went to dinner, but I thought it was because she was so nervous.

  “We’re not going to run out on this tab, are we?” she asks dryly.

  I chuckle. “No, that was a one-time thing. Were you worried when you accepted my invitation to breakfast?”

  She pushes her almost empty plate away from her and folds her hands on the table. “The thought did cross my mind.” She arches an eyebrow at me.

  “You don’t ever have to worry about that again, angel,” I reassure her. I pick up the bill the waitress left at the edge of the table. “I’m going to take care of this right now.” I wink, pulling my wallet out of my back pocket. I remove two twenties and throw them down on the table. “Are you all set?” I gesture to her plate.

  “Yeah, I can’t believe how much I ate,” she giggles.

  “This is one of my favorite places for breakfast. We’ll come back soon.” We can make it one of our regular places, like couples who have been together for a long time. I smile at the thought of forming habits with her. I hope we get the opportunity.

  I rise from my chair, pulling on my jacket. She does the same, tugging on the same white hat she wore when we went to the tree farm. We’ve come so far since then and it’s only been a month.

  She puts on matching mittens and I gesture for her to precede me down the narrow aisle between the tables and booths. Larry’s, the greasy spoon we came to is jammed with people. Every available seat occupied.

  Once we’re outside, I stop her with my hand on her arm. She smiles up at me as I pull her hat down over her ears. “There, better.” My fingers caress her cheek. “You’re beautiful,” I say, in awe of her alluring face. She flushes pink and it’s not from the cold air.

 

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