by Crescent,Sam
“I didn’t have a clue what I was doing. I only knew you felt good.”
“We were too young to really know what we were doing.”
“We weren’t too young to keep on trying,” he said, pulling up onto his driveway.
Neither of them got out of the car when he turned the engine off.
“It seems another life. Like someone else lived it.”
He agreed.
“Saint, do you ever think about what would have happened if I hadn’t left?” she asked.
“All the time.” He admitted the truth. “I even wonder what would have happened if I had followed you.”
“What?”
“I let you go, Nat. The night we gave each other a part of ourselves, I made you a vow to always be by your side. I failed you.”
“You didn’t fail me, Saint. I failed us. I left.”
She placed her hand on his, and he couldn’t help but notice how much smaller she was than he was. Grasping her fingers, he pressed a kiss to her hand, inhaling her scent.
“I bet your dad was happy to see me go,” she said.
“He didn’t complain about it, and he got a more obedient son.”
She nodded. “He did tell me that when it came to you, he’d win.”
“What do you mean?”
“Your father would tell me to stay away from you. You had responsibilities within the club that had nothing to do with me. He said that I made you weak, and you needed to learn to be strong. Also, he said I was only going to do what women do. Leave when the going gets tough.” She snorted. “I guess he was right.”
“I never knew.” He’d told his old man to stay away. “I always tried to keep the club away from you.”
“Is that why you won’t take me to the club?”
Saint turned to stare at her. The club had made her run once before. What if she ran again? Fuck, he wasn’t this kind of guy. He wasn’t a pussy. The world knew him as a monster. He was the guy who’d killed his own father, and then wiped out the members who refused to follow his leadership. He was the kind of man who killed without batting an eyelid.
“The club has changed a lot. You’d be surprised.”
“I bet. You’re the Prez.”
“That I am.” He opened the car door, bringing an end to their conversation.
“I’ll start looking for my own place.”
“You don’t have to. I’m happy for you to be here.”
“I can’t stay here indefinitely. I need to get my own place, get a job, get back on my own two feet.”
He locked the car and followed her up toward the door. She held the bag that contained the dildo and the butt plug. When they had been younger, he’d not had any special toys to use on her, nothing to have her screaming his name.
Saint watched as she walked straight toward the kitchen, putting the items on the counter.
“I’m going to take a shower.”
“Okay.”
He walked up to his bedroom, closed and locked the door, before heading into his en-suite shower.
Running the water, he removed his clothes, and climbed into the stall.
Closing his eyes, he lifted his face to the running water.
“Tell me what you love about me?” Natasha asked, locking their fingers together.
He stared down into her pretty green eyes. They had made love, and it had been perfect. Each time he was inside her, he truly felt like he’d come home.
“Everything. I love your smile, your laugh, your kindness. I love that you’re hard assed, and you kick some serious ass.” She laughed, arching up. “And what I love most is that you put up with me.”
“Always, Saint, always.”
It hadn’t been always. Turning around, he grabbed some soap and lathered up his body. Nigel had advised him to go and have a chat with Simon. He had all of the fucker’s details, and it would be so easy to do.
He washed his body, ignoring his rock hard cock. There was no way he was going to masturbate. He wasn’t that far gone yet.
Once he was done in the shower, he entered the bedroom, and grabbed his cell phone. Dialing Rage’s number, he waited for his VP to pick up.
“What can I do for you?” Rage asked.
“Do you want to come and meet the guy who likes to beat women?” he asked.
“You going to meet the husband?”
“I’m going to make sure the husband understands a divorce is happening.”
“Sure thing. I’m game. You getting a few boys?”
“Yep. You’re just the first I’m recruiting.”
“Yay, I’m number one.”
Saint smirked, hanging up the phone. He called Pea, Vanilla, and Buzz. They all wanted to go and see the man that had roughed up a woman. Next, he put a call through to Pipe.
“Will you watch over my woman while I go and check out her ex?”
“Sure thing. I’ve got no problem dealing with that shit. You going to make him pay?”
“I’m not going to make him pay, but I am going to make sure he knows exactly what he’s dealing with.”
“Well, I heard from Elena that Melissa is holding a little girls’ get-together. You can go Friday. That way all the women are in one place, and I can keep an eye on the house. You also won’t need an excuse. I’ll let Elena know to get Nat drinking.”
“I knew there was a reason I liked you.”
“Sure thing, Saint.”
Hanging up the phone, he threw it on the bed and rubbed at his eyes.
“There are plenty of women where she came from. She was just a girl, and didn’t know how to really take care of you.” His father patted his back. “Trixie!” His father shouted to the club whore that was everyone’s favorite.
“Dad, no.”
“Son, I insist. You’ve been moping around for the past four months. Nat is gone, and she’s not coming back.”
Trixie had come into his room, intent on making all of his fantasies a reality. When his father left, he’d told Trixie he’d pay her a thousand dollars to tell his father he’d rocked her world, fucking her all night long.
It had taken him a long time to finally sleep with a woman after Nat had left. Each time he touched someone else, it always felt like a betrayal. Natasha had gotten under his skin, into his heart, and not having her in his life had been pure torture. The thought of her being anywhere but with him, made him feel sick to his stomach. He couldn’t lose her, and he refused to give up.
****
“We have a new lady with us tonight,” Melissa said, walking into the sitting room.
Natasha smiled, accepting the glass of wine. Her bruises were starting to fade, along with the aches and pains. She hadn’t found much in the way of work. Saint kept dropping her off at the sex store, and she was pretty much working there. She didn’t have anything else to do. Staying at home all day doing nothing drove her crazy. Being in Saint’s home made her yearn for a life that she had walked away from. There were no children, no families.
She had always imagined she and Saint would end up with a couple of kids together. In her plans she had not seen Saint being part of the Saint and Sinners MC, but the club that had been controlled by his father was not the club that it was today.
“To Natasha, that we don’t know much about other than she can get Saint’s panties in a twist.”
“Can we not talk about my brother or anything to do with panties?” Elena asked. “He is still my brother.”
“We all know there is a lot of history there. Come on, spill,” Melissa said.
“How about we do the introductions first?”
“Fine, fine, fine, I’m Melissa. I’m married to Pea, and I’m awesome.”
Natasha giggled, then took a sip of wine.
“I’m Penny. Rage’s old lady, and I’m also the mother to Leonardo. We’re trying for another baby but so far, nothing.”
“Nice to meet you.”
“I’m a rebel,” Elena said. “I’m not a Saint and Sinners old lady. I’
m Pipe’s old lady, and he is the Prez of the Hell’s Wolves.”
“Which is where I come in. I’m Sarah, and I’m also the old lady to Knife. He’s one of the Hell’s Wolves as well.”
“I’m Shannon. I’m a club whore, and I have no intention of settling down.”
Natasha caught the pained look in Melissa’s face as she drank a large gulp of wine.
“I’m Shawl’s old lady,” a blonde said, perking up. She was drinking water. “I’m Emma.”
“So there are more Hell’s Wolves old ladies than there are Saint and Sinners?” Natasha asked.
“It’s why we need you here to balance us out,” Melissa said.
“I’m not an old lady, and I’m not a club whore either.”
“You belong to Saint. You can’t deny it.”
She stared down into her glass. “Saint and I are complicated.”
“Do you love him?” Penny asked.
“What?”
“You’ve been married to a scumbag, and the first person you come to for help is Saint. I think there are some feelings there that you’re not being completely honest about.”
Natasha laughed.
“You left him,” Elena said. “Did you want to leave him?”
Natasha licked her lips, and stared past Elena’s shoulder. “Did I want to leave Saint?” She bit her lip, and suddenly felt a need to cry. “It’s complicated, and even though I did want to leave him, it was who he was becoming I wanted to leave. Let me explain. The first time I met Saint, he was in the school playground, and it was first thing in the morning. We were five years old, and he was moody. I saw him sitting on this swing, looking like someone had taken his toy away. I went up, and pushed him. He didn’t like me at first, but I was pretty persistent.” She smiled, recalling that moment. Out of all of the children at school, Saint had been the one she’d wanted to know. She hadn’t been able to look away.
“He never talks about you,” Elena said.
“Your dad was pretty determined for him to become something when it came to the club. Even before I left, he was fighting. Always turning up at my house bleeding and bruised.”
“He was your childhood sweetheart?” Penny asked.
“Yes.”
“It just seems so surreal that the hard assed Saint could have a sweetheart,” Penny said.
“He wasn’t always like this. Saint wasn’t cold, or hard. He was this sweet guy. He was my first kiss, the first guy I slept with. He was the man that meant everything to me.” Natasha licked her dry lips, then took another gulp of wine. “No, I didn’t want to leave him. I hated the thought of it, but I also saw the guy I loved was dying. Every single day your father was turning him into a man I didn’t recognize, I couldn’t recognize, and little by little, it was killing him. In my heart I didn’t leave the boy and man I fell in love with. I had to leave the man your father was turning him into. Saint changed. He was different. He wasn’t mine.” Sucking her lips in, she saw the pity in all of their gazes. “So I left, and I dated a little. Never really got into a relationship. My folks left Sinners’ Corner, and I met Simon. The lovely, a little older, lawyer who seemed nice. I dated him. Never really committing to anything. Then my parents passed, and I thought why not? Why not marry this guy who seems to like me? I liked him. He liked me, it should work. I wasn’t going back to Sinners’ Corner, and my parents were dead.”
“When you had no one, he was the one that made you feel alive, even if it was just a little bit,” Shannon said.
Elena started giggling. “I’m sorry, but you left Saint because you were scared of him becoming this kind of monster, and in turn you ended up with a monster?”
Natasha stared at Elena. “I was pretty stupid.”
“Stupid is not what I would call it,” Elena said.
“Elena,” Penny, Shannon, and Melissa said.
“What? I get it. Her asshole husband deserves everything that is coming to him, but please remember, Saint is my brother. She hurt him, and even I’ve seen a difference inside him since she came back. Saint is better than that other asshole, and yet instead of coming back home to Saint, she went with someone she didn’t even love.”
“Yeah, she’s right. I guess when I needed it most, he was there. I was the fool though, and Elena has every right to point it out. Saint is her brother, and he’s the better man. Look at what my choice of good guy did to me.” Natasha pointed at her fading bruises. “I came back to Sinners’ Corner. I came back to Saint.” Taking another large gulp of wine, she found her glass empty, and held it out for a top up. “This is probably going to sound crazy, but I sometimes felt like I deserved the hits from Simon.”
“What? Why?” Melissa asked.
The other women gasped and shook their heads. “Think about it. I never really committed to him. I didn’t even love him. I liked him. When he left, I didn’t wish to see him at the end of the day. I said ‘goodbye’, and ‘see you later’. If I didn’t see him for days at a time, and that happened, I wasn’t calling him, begging to know where he was. For the most part, we lived separate lives.”
“I couldn’t imagine doing that with Rage,” Penny said. “He’s always calling me. I miss him from the moment he walks out the door. I wonder about his day.”
“Me too, with Pipe.”
“I’m going to get some more wine,” Melissa said.
“I’ll help,” Natasha said, getting to her feet, and following the other woman out of the room. They walked into the kitchen, and Melissa opened the fridge showing an abundance of wine.
“I always make sure I have plenty for ladies’ night. I would have hired a stripper, but their men would kill me,” she said, laughing.
“You look a little uncomfortable. You okay?” Natasha asked.
Melissa stared at her, and then past her shoulder. “I don’t know. It’s complicated.”
“As complicated as me and Saint? Try me.”
Melissa nodded. “Okay, fine. I married Pea, and he provided protection for me and Penny. At the time, I knew we were not going to be faithful to one another. I was wild, and I liked variety, as did he. I thought he was attractive, and we promised each other, never to take a fuck to the next level, and to promise to talk if we started having feelings for someone else.”
“Wow,” Natasha said. “You agreed to this?”
“I wanted it. I was in my early twenties, marrying a man to help protect my younger sister. I wasn’t looking to just be with one man. I like Pea. He’s fun, and he was what I wanted.”
“Why do I feel a ‘but’ coming along?”
“But just recently something has changed. Like … Shannon. I like her. I also know that Pea has fucked her, and that she is a favorite because she likes it dirty.” Melissa paused, rubbing her fingers over her lips. “I don’t know. Shannon, she’s a good woman. Won’t ever try it on with another woman’s man.”
“She tried it on with Pea.”
“With the knowledge that I didn’t care. Sometimes I found it kind of hot to watch him, and he sometimes liked to watch me with different men. Back then I didn’t care. He could come and go as he pleased, and I wouldn’t say anything. Now, I like to know what he’s doing. He shares stuff with me, and I noticed that he comes home.” She laughed. “I’ve even been learning how to cook just so I can provide him a meal he actually likes.”
“That must be nice.”
“Yeah, it’s nice and it’s scary as fuck because, I’m actually in love with my husband, and I don’t even know if he likes me.” She laughed.
Natasha watched as tears filled the other woman’s eyes. “I’m so sorry.”
“No, this isn’t your fault.” Melissa waved her hand in front of her face, and took some deep breaths until the tears faded away. “I always believed I was doing the right thing, and now, I don’t know.”
“What is the right thing?”
“Marrying a guy I liked. Providing protection for myself and for Penny. Having the whole open marriage thing. It was kind of hot.�
� She held up her ring. “This didn’t mean anything to me. It was just a band that meant I belonged to Pea. Now, I worry that some woman, some club whore will give him something a lot more than me, and I’ll have to leave.”
“Have you talked to him?”
“No. I won’t talk to him about it. I can’t. I don’t want to be that woman that changes the rules after so long. I won’t scare him away.”
“But what if he’s feeling the same?”
“I don’t know, and you don’t know Pea. Anyway, enough of us being like baby girls. They’re wanting their wine.”
Natasha grabbed the bottle and entered the room, taking a seat. The conversation had changed to Emma and her upcoming fifth child. She listened while also wondering what Saint was doing. She doubted Shannon was the only club whore providing the club entertainment. Then her thoughts turned to Melissa. No one saw how troubled she was, or how much pain she was in. How long had she been feeling like this? Did Pea even have an idea?
You’ve got to stay out of it.
You don’t know a thing.
Sipping at her wine, she pushed all the other thoughts aside, and focused on the conversation, determined to have fun for once.
Chapter Five
“He’s working late,” Rage said.
Saint stared up at the office building that contained the man who thought he could hurt Natasha. He straddled his bike. He was there along with Pea, Vanilla, Buzz, and Willy who’d decided to come along last minute. Climbing off his bike, Saint made his way toward the front entrance. No one was around but a security guard.
“Sir, you shouldn’t be in here.”
“Got an appointment. Simon Meyer, which floor?”
“Wait a minute, this is after hours.”
Finding a plaque on the wall, he spotted Simon’s name, and made his way toward the elevator with his men right behind him.
“What’s the plan?” Rage asked.
“Try not to leave with a body bag.” He had his gun in the back of his jeans, but he was determined not to use it.
“Shame,” Vanilla said. “I’d have loved to take him apart piece by piece. No man should hit a woman.”
“You hit them for fun,” Willy said.