by J. M. Paul
I was in love and happy, and for the first time in a long time, I was excited to live and to discover what the future had in store for me.
We had been back in Michigan for one week. School would start tomorrow, and it was my last day of freedom before I would be swamped under classes, projects, papers, and responsibilities.
The situation with Joel was hard, but I was making it through.
The day after the attack had happened, I had spent the entire day at the police station with Bax by my side. When Julie and Ken, Joel’s parents, had been notified of the situation, they had boarded a plane to San Francisco. To my surprise, they had offered me their support and apologized profusely that their son had repeatedly hurt me under their roof and their noses for so many years. They had claimed their sorrow over Jarrod’s death had made them blind, and as much as I had wanted to hate them for that, I couldn’t. Out of anyone, I knew what grief could do to a person.
I had found it strange that the Manors had taken my side so completely—until I had learned they had searched Joel’s room before they flew out to the city. They had taken pictures of their findings and brought several documents along with them to be used as evidence.
Joel had had a shrine dedicated to me in his closet. He had several pictures of me; some were in everyday life, but most were after he had just raped me. My body was limp and bruised in places I could later cover by clothes. He had kept a diary and had written every explicit detail of his acts against me along with his feelings of hatred and superiority.
The most disturbing piece of evidence found was the research and notes that Joel had kept on how to sabotage the gas line to the water heater in my parents’ house without causing suspicion. His findings had certainly worked, but the faulty part in his plan was to actually document and keep everything.
When I had found out, I had gone into a new type of depression. Joel had purposely planned to kill my family, Jarrod, and me since I was supposed to be home for the explosion as revenge for feeling like he had never measured up in any of our eyes. It had been a punishment not only to my family and Jarrod, but also to Joel’s parents. Joel had figured, if my family, Jarrod, and I were out of the picture, he would have his parents’ sole focus, and he would become their number one. But Joel had never planned on me surviving. When I had come to live with them in their house, he’d felt I had taken the attention away from him even though Joel’s parents hadn’t paid attention to either of us because they were too lost in their anguish, and his acts against me had been my punishment for ruining his plans.
Currently, Joel was still stuck in a San Francisco prison without bail. The court system was trying to distinguish who would prosecute him and for what. My attack had happened in California, but the repeated rapes and abuse had occurred in Michigan along with the explosion and first-degree murder of my family and Jarrod.
I didn’t care what the courts decided. All that mattered to me was Joel would be punished for his crimes, and he would pay for them for life.
Warm lips brushed against my neck and sent a shiver down my spine.
“Hey, hot stuff.” Bax’s warm voice vibrated against my skin.
“Hey. I’m almost done.” I made a couple of changes to the photo I was working on and pressed Save. When I spun to wrap my arms around Bax, he was beaming at me. “What?”
He shook his head. “Maybe I should’ve had you teach me about angles and lighting. Your pictures from the trip are astounding, babe. Like, they could make me jealous in an I-could-hate-you-if-I-didn’t-love-you-so-much kind of way.” The devious smile that crept onto his mouth made me grin.
“Yeah? You think the student should become the teacher now? I wonder what Professor Ericson would say about that.” I lifted my eyebrows in challenge.
“I don’t care what he has to say. I’m not his GTA anymore.”
When we had confronted Ericson about our relationship, he hadn’t been mad, but he couldn’t allow me to be a student in a class where Bax graded papers and photography challenges. We had understood, and instead of me having to transfer from a class and professor I loved, Bax had said he would back out of the position. He hadn’t needed the money; he had only taken the position for the enjoyment.
Yes, he’s a weirdo and a photography nerd, but he’s all mine.
“You ready to go to dinner?” Bax gently pulled on a strand of my blonde hair and then fingered my pink ruffled top. “This is a pretty color on you.”
I looked down and pulled the top over my hips. Now that we were home and I was feeling more secure and comfortable in my skin, I had taken Carly’s advice to break from my dark shell and started to wear color again. Tonight, it was a bright color. Since we were meeting Milo and Carly—who were still going strong on the dating front—for dinner, I figured it was the perfect time to break myself in.
“Thanks.” I pushed onto my toes to plant a kiss on his cheek and then turned to grab my purse and phone.
Bax caught me before I got too far and pulled me back against him. “Hey, hey, hey. Where are you going so fast?” He leaned down to capture my lips with his and led us into a passionate deep kiss.
“Mmm. As much as I love your mouth on mine, we have to go. We’re going to be late, and I don’t want to listen to Milo complain. You know how he gets when he’s hungry, and Mexican food is near,” I said.
“Crap. You’re right. Let’s go.” He teasingly pushed me away from him and jogged to the door. “Let’s go, woman!” he yelled when I took too long to grab my stuff.
“Quiet. If you don’t behave yourself, I’ll withhold my sexy little vixen body from you tonight, and you can go back to your apartment all by your cold and unsatisfied self.” I tipped my head at him in a playful warning.
Bax fell to his knees and buried his face in my stomach. “Please no, babe. The withdrawals would kill me. Now that I’ve had this little drug known as your body, I can’t get enough.”
He peeked up at me, and he was smiling so big, his dimple was showing. I could get lost in that little crater in his skin for hours.
“Get up, you fiend. If you behave yourself, maybe we’ll find out what your reward might be.”
“I like the sound of that.” He climbed to his feet and swept me up in his arms. “To dinner we go, wench!”
Stepping outside, he turned, so I could secure the door, just as he had held me while I closed the door to my past.
With Bax by my side, I was no longer holding on until the pain ended. I was living, breathing, and enjoying every adventure with him. We were the light in each other’s lives and pushed the other to be better, do better, and to believe happiness existed.
Bax had taught me the pain and suffering I had experienced throughout my life would always be a part of me, but that it didn’t have to define me. I’d learned it was okay to let go, to laugh, and to live my life as my family would have wanted.
And the future I was meant to have was with Bax and his unwavering love—forever.
Two Years Later
The taxi driver skidded to a halt in front of the building I had given him the address to and barked the amount I owed. Digging through my purse, I pulled out some cash, threw it at the rude man who barely spoke English, and leaped out of the cab. As soon as I retrieved my suitcase and slammed the trunk shut, the cabbie squealed his tires and sped off into traffic.
“Sheesh,” I grumbled to myself as I shook my head.
Tilting my head back, I looked up at the concrete building stretching several stories high. The height almost made me feel dizzy, but when compared to the structures around it, it could be considered small.
Hitching my new camera bag and purse higher onto my shoulder, I pulled out the handle to my suitcase and wheeled it behind me as I made my way to the entrance.
“Hello, Miss Daniels. I trust your trip into the city has been pleasurable thus far?” The man sitting behind the desk tipped his hat at me when I entered. He walked around the counter to press the button for the elevator.
“Yes. Thank you.”
“Mr. Baxley told me I should be expecting you. I believe he is anxious for your arrival.” The man winked at me before he wandered back over to his seat.
When the elevator arrived, I stepped on and pressed the button for the ninth floor. I waved my thanks to the older gentleman just before the doors closed.
Arriving to the floor I had visited several times over the last year, my heart started to thud in my chest, and I felt light-headed from my breathlessness.
Finding apartment 902, I knocked so hard, my knuckles protested. What can I say? I’m excited and impatient to see my boyfriend.
The door swung open, and Krit—Bax’s friend whom we had roomed with during our stay in New York on our road trip a couple of years ago—filled the space entirely.
“Hey, sexy mama!” Krit leaned down, wrapped his arms around me, and lifted me off the ground into a bear hug.
I squealed, smacked his shoulder, and then laughed when he spun me around twice. “Put me down, you brute.”
When my feet touched the floor, he said, “I’m so glad you’re here. Bax hasn’t shut up about your visit for the last four days. He’s a whiny little bastard. Good thing he’s hot.” Krit winked, and I shook my head at him.
“Where is he?” I lifted onto my tiptoes to try to see around Krit, but it was useless; the guy was a beast—tall, all muscles, and covered in tattoos.
“Oh, shit, that’s right. He wanted me to give you this.” Krit reached to the side, grabbed something, and then handed me a white envelope.
“What’s this?” I turned the sealed paper over in my hands.
“The fuck if I know. Bax told me to give it to you when you got here and to make sure you opened it. So, open it, Libby, and go find—”
“Krit, baby, come back to bed. I’m cold and lonely without you,” a woman’s seductive voice interrupted as it carried through the apartment.
Krit wiggled his eyebrows. “And, on that note, I’m going to go dive in for round two”—he leaned down to whisper—“before I kick her out.”
“You’re a pig.”
“You know it, sweet thing.” He winked and flashed his perfectly straight teeth. He grabbed my suitcase and camera bag from me. “Now, go find your man and put him out of his misery,” Krit said before he shut the door in my face.
“What the heck?” I lifted my arms in the air in frustration. “Glad I came to town for this freaking treatment,” I mumbled as I ripped the envelope open in annoyance.
I pulled out the lined sheet of yellow paper, unfolded it, and perused Bax’s immaculate penmanship.
Ad Lib,
You’re finally here! And I’m guessing you’re wondering why I’m not. Sorry, babe, but I had some pressing details that needed my immediate attention. I’m on floor eleven in apartment 1101, dealing with them. Come find me, and I promise, I’ll make it worth your effort. ;)
Can’t wait to see your beautiful face!
xoxo,
B
I tried to hold my immediate disappointment off, but it was useless. After hours of traveling to see him, he wasn’t even here, waiting for me, when he probably knew my schedule better than I did.
Releasing a defeated breath, I adjusted my purse on my shoulder and walked back toward the lift.
He’d better have one darn good excuse for this nonsense, I thought to myself as I stabbed the button.
When I exited onto the floor Bax had told me, I searched the apartment numbers until I located the one Bax had written down.
Smoothing my hands down my shirt and then fluffing my hair, I lifted my fist to knock. Before my hand came in contact with the hard surface, the door swung open, and I was greeted with the most exquisite hazel eyes.
Bax stood in a nicely pressed black polo shirt, dark jeans, bare feet, and a wide, happy smile. Love radiated off of him and slammed into me, immediately depleting my frustration and replacing it with euphoria. Bax was my everything, and I couldn’t help the serenity and giddiness I felt when in his presence.
It had only been three weeks since I last saw him, but it had felt like years.
“Hey, gorgeous.” It was whispered in reverence, and the words alone spoken from his delectable mouth sent shivers through my body. “How was your flight? Did you have any trouble?”
Why is he asking me about my travels and not sweeping me up into his arms and kissing me until I can’t breathe?
“It was fine, good.”
“Great,” he said merrily, but it was quickly contradicted by the slight tremble in his voice.
Something is going on.
He still hadn’t moved to touch me, and he was blocking the door to the apartment, so I couldn’t really see inside. The oddity of the situation made me uncomfortable and suspicious—of what, I didn’t know. I twisted my hands together and then toyed with the purse hanging at my hip.
“Sorry, let me take that for you.” Bax lifted the weight from my shoulder and set it just inside the door I couldn’t see around.
We remained in silence, observing each other. Bax smiled as he studied me, and I was certain that confusion was written on my features.
A flicker of light behind Bax caught my attention, and I noticed there was a lantern or something lighting the room. It puzzled me further.
Bax studied me for a beat longer—almost as if in awe—and then suddenly leaned forward and firmly planted his mouth on mine in a brief yet passionate kiss.
“Mmm,” he hummed low in his throat. “I’ve been waiting for this for what seems like forever.” It was said against my lips before he stepped back. “Will you come in?” He pushed the door open further.
“Um, that’s why I’m here, isn’t it?” I scrunched my eyebrows together and tilted my head in uncertainty.
He chuckled softly and nodded. “Of course.”
Creaking sounded as I pushed the door open further to walk past Bax and into the interior of the apartment. Bax took my suitcase from me and set it next to my bags by the door.
The flickering light wasn’t a lantern but small candles set up around the interior. Inside, the studio apartment was a small but open space that made it seem larger. There was a wall of windows encasing a limited view of New York City. To the right of where I had entered was the kitchen and was separated from the living space by a long counter. Past that was a floating wall that housed the refrigerator and pantry. Beyond that, it curved into what I imagined could only be the bedroom and bathroom.
Bax gently closed the entrance, stepped around me, and walked to stand in the middle of the space under a fan that hung from the high ceilings. Each blade of the fan had a soft piece of white ribbon hanging from it, and as it slowly swirled around the room, it created a serene effect. In each corner of the space, there were small tables with white linen tablecloths and small objects displayed on them that I couldn’t make out in the dim light.
“What’s this?” I turned toward Bax and indicated the apartment that could only be described as a romantic setting.
He raised his arms as he stepped toward me. “This is for you.”
“What? I…I don’t understand.” I shook my head.
When Bax’s hand grabbed mine and intertwined our fingers, I exhaled in relief. Whenever his skin was against mine, I felt at ease.
“Come,” he said gently as he led me toward one of the tables in the corner.
In the flickering candlelight, I could see a few scattered picture frames placed on the tabletop. The first was the black-and-white photo of the girl I had taken that awarded me a position on the road trip. A series of my best photographs from our trip were framed, telling the story of our journey across the country together.
“That trip was what brought us together and where we fell in love,” he murmured in my ear.
Pulling me farther into the room, we stepped to the next table, and I found it covered in pennies lying in the shape of an infinity sign. Since the trip, pennies and the infinity sign had become our thing. They were spe
cial to us in a way only we could understand. At the base of the lower right side of the infinity sign—the same location I had H.O.P.E. inscribed into my tattoo—sat an oversized cent with the word Liberty emphasized. It brought a grin to my lips.
When I came to the third table, it had a white card on it with Open me inscribed on the front. I lifted it, raised the cover, and read, Turn around.
Flashing my attention to the last table, I noticed it had a plain black box turned upside down. I found that weird, but before I investigated, I pivoted toward Bax, like the note had requested. When my eyes landed on him, he held a white square box in his hand.
My heart thundered in my chest, and I suddenly felt faint.
“Please come here, Ad Lib.”
He beckoned me with a finger when I remained still. Slowly, I moved in his direction. When I reached him, Bax placed his hand over my fisted fingers and pried them apart, one by one, with a smirk.
“Don’t freak out. It’s not what you think,” he whispered as he placed the box in my hand. “Open it.”
I eyed him with uncertainly, and he encouraged me with my favorite smile, the one that assured me everything was going to be okay and that I needed to trust him.
I slowly lifted the lid and inhaled a quiet gasp. Nestled inside the white box was a penny key chain with a copper key fastened to it. Shock was the first emotion to hit and then excitement.
Is he asking what I think he’s asking without actually asking?
My heart raced in my chest, and my hands started to shake. My eyes bounced between him and the key in my hand several times. His lips were moving, but I couldn’t hear anything over the blood thundering in my ears. It was instantly hot in the room, and I started to perspire.
“Libby. Libby? Liberty,” Bax said louder and louder—or maybe it sounded like it grew in volume once my heart started to settle and quit sending mass amounts of blood pounding through my head.