"Tara, if you've found happiness, grab hold of it and don't ever let go. That's my advice. Are you going to have kids?"
Her expression darkened. "No…no, we can't have kids. We've checked. Gildron's genetics do not allow him to successfully breed with our species. It's a shame. I so wanted to have children." She was looking at the tablecloth again.
"More dox, sir?" Our little waitress was there with a tray of dox. I stared at her briefly, as if she was an intruder from another planet. Then I recovered, nodded, and she gave us more dox. I turned back to Tara.
"I'm sorry," I said. "Maybe you could adopt?"
"Willard!" She smiled again. "We've already agreed to adopt Willard as our son. He loves us both—and we love him!"
"Good. That's good. That's great!"
"We're going to be happy, Wester." She was looking into my eyes, confident once again. "And I don't care what anyone thinks!"
"Happiness," I said. "Can you do me a favor, Tara?"
"Anything!"
"Let me know what it's like."
***
Months passed. I was busy working, every day. I lost myself in the work. The situation in the galaxy seemed frozen. There was a lot going on, plenty to keep us busy, very busy, but the overall situation did not change. Nobody attacked us. The Lost Command retained control of Dindabai and most of the Outvac but the Loyalists controlled the Crista Cluster, Andrion and the approaches to the Border Zone, the Gassies and the Gulf. Four years after our intervention on Uldo, the Legion was still tracking down and exterminating O's downside, but Uldo was ours, a planet had finally been retaken from the Omnis, and the System was enraged that ConFree would not hand control back to them. I smiled when I heard that, and it didn't matter that it was Loyalist forces that had done it. Uldo was ours! We had paid for it in blood. The Eighth Legion was finally avenged.
The O migration into Systie vac continued, but at a much slower pace. No Legion worlds were threatened. Tara told me high-level negotiations were underway between the LC and ConFree, but the damned talks didn't ever seem to end.
Valkyrie and I became closer than ever. She moved into my cube, and we spent all our off-hours together. We needed each other desperately and our lovemaking was frantic and shameless. There wasn't much we didn't do. We lost each other in sex, and I prayed for happiness, but it didn't help. We were both miserable. We would sometimes go all day without even speaking to each other, not because we were angry, but because it didn't seem necessary. It was enough, being together and making love. But it wasn't really enough.
I had a little shrine in one corner of my cube, a holo of Priestess, faintly smiling, a little slice of the past, always there, always on, emitting a ghostly glow at night. When Valkyrie moved in, she added one of Scrapper, and the two of them were there, standing side by side, watching us as we made love. It was crazy.
And all day Moontouch and Stormdawn would be overlooking me as I worked from another holo right over my desk. Haunting me. It was crazy. I was slowly going crazy. 'God should have mercy on people who get what they want.' Tara had said that on Uldo. Absolutely right, Tara. I had wanted my memory back, I had been going crazy, and now I had it, and I was going crazy once again.
It was crazy.
Chapter 12
K2
We're almost there," Tara said. She was driving the aircar and I was the only passenger, sitting beside her up front. We had penetrated a vast, thick forest of tall dark trees and were following a trail marked with phospho sensors on the tree trunks, skimming along a few marks over the forest floor, raising a fine dust of shredded leaves. The roof of the forest filtered the sunlight to a pale glow. The entire forest appeared to be a security zone. I could tell. The aircar's sensors chirped with challenges and responses, and from time to time we would pass lone camfaxed Legion soldiers lounging by the path with Manlinks slung over their shoulders. Apparently we were authorized, because nobody tried to stop us. I could tell a lot of heavy traffic passed along this trail. The trees closest to the path were missing a lot of vegetation, and the trail itself was remarkably free of debris.
"You're not going to tell me what this is all about?" I asked again.
"Wait till we get there. All your questions will be answered then."
The land rose as we entered the foothills of a forested mountain range. The trail led right into a pair of massive cenite blast doors in the side of a cliff, rolling open at our approach. We entered a vast Legion base, fully hardsited and camfaxed. I was surprised that I had been unaware of the existence of such a large installation.
Tara parked the aircar in a wall slot and as we walked away our car disappeared and an empty park slot rolled into view. The place was fully automated and evidently heavily populated—otherwise they wouldn't need rotating car parks.
We entered a Security office where our ID's were scanned and stick-on badges issued. I had to sign a form pledging to reveal nothing, to anyone, forever, on pain of death. Fine. I signed it. Death didn't scare me anymore. Tara smiled. We proceeded into an elevator. It shot downwards into the earth. Floor levels swirled past on the display, then stopped abruptly on the letter M. The door snapped open and we stepped out into another Security checkpoint. There was a long counter and a wall of hardhats. Somebody checked our ID's and somebody else slid a couple of hardhats along the counter toward us. Deep vibrations were running through the floor. The hardhats covered our ears and were equipped with comsets.
"CAN YOU HEAR ME?" Tara's voice boomed in my ears.
"Yeah. Turn down the volume."
"Welcome to K2, Wester. It's my pride and joy! You're going to love it."
"K2, huh? Never heard of it."
"Good. You weren't supposed to. Right out this door." She palmed open a blast door and a harsh roar overwhelmed us. We stepped out onto a wide catwalk that ran along one wall of a gigantic tunnel that had been carved out of the underworld. The catwalk receded into the distance. Bright lights burnt and flashed in a vast cavern of ear-shattering noise and leaping shadows and a confusing tangle of heavy equipment. We were looking into an artificial canyon of frenzied activity. Some kind of gigantic, horizontal, vaguely tubular structure was under construction. Down below, heavy groundcars full of techs and equipment moved along jerkily with spotlights blazing. Up above, a confusing framework of access catwalks and guide rails and booms and cranes covered the massive cenite beast they were working on. Techs and workers tiptoed along the catwalks like ants. The ceiling blazed with blinding spotlights.
Tara paused, looking out over it all, fists grasping the guard rail, and I could see that look in her face, that look that said she was off again, doing exactly what she believed in, heart and soul, and nothing was going to stop her short of a laser track in the brain. I knew her so well it was scary. I decided right then I was going to get out of her way for this one. I knew I wanted nothing to do with it, whatever it was. Tara was dangerous—and I'd had enough.
A massive, pale blue metallic bonder was attached to the main structure like a leech. It shrieked and glowed. A shower of glowing yellow sparks fell in slow motion down into the canyon. Something flickered like lightning, off to one side, and spat flames. A clap of thunder rumbled through the canyon. A series of short, sharp explosions echoed passed us like an E on autofire. A group of techs brushed past us, laughing. They were wearing fatigues with Logistics insignia. I realized then why so many troopers in Dindabai wore Logs insignia.
"K2, huh?" I asked.
"It's the second largest city on Dindabai, Wester. Fully self-contained. There are people here who never even bother to visit Dinda."
I strained to make out the shape of the massive cenite structure that was the obvious center of attention. There was so much going on there I couldn't really make sense of it.
"So what's the project, Tara?"
She threw back her head and looked out proudly over her creature. I knew it was hers, whatever it was. She smiled and spoke.
"It's a starship, Wester. Our starsh
ip. The ultimate starship." Her eyes gleamed. She was out there all right. Gone again. I had thought Gildron was going to calm her down. It had been a really charming wedding, out in a forest, the bride and groom bedecked with white flowers, and we had pelted them with blossoms, and Tara had seemed happier and more relaxed than ever, and I had hoped that she was saved, at last. But it was all an illusion, I could see now. Tara was back, the real Tara, the genuine article, standing right there.
"Tara," I said. "The LC has got a whole fleet of starships. Why do we need another one?"
She tore her gaze away from the ship, surprised. "This one's different, Wester. This ship will ensure galactic supremacy for the LC—for the Legion. This ship will revolutionize star travel. It will change history. Everything will change, once this lovely lady hits the vac."
"Don't you ever get tired, Tara? You told me you only wanted to be happy. You said you wanted a normal life. You said you were tired of struggling. What happened to all that?"
"I am happy, Wester. I've never been happier! Come on! Want to go inside?"
"Not really."
"Oh, come on! Follow me. You can tell your grandchildren about this one."
She led me into an access ramp that brought us into the heart of the ship. We tramped down a long ship's corridor and it was a real mess, raw cenite slabs, hundreds of K of flexible tubing and wires and pipes tangled up everywhere, blazing lights dangling from open cavities, piles of wall panels stacked man-high and groups of workers bending over live laser tools while construction probes whizzed over our heads like metal bats.
We paused in an extra-large chamber with gaping holes in the roof and bulkheads. A temporary office had been set up there. Several techs were consulting plastic printouts and querying a d-screen for information. One of them greeted Tara. She was evidently a frequent visitor.
"This will be the bridge, Wester. Controls will be over there. The power boom runs out ahead—take a look!" She brought me over to the open portion that was evidently destined to be the bridge's forward viewport. I could make it out now, a long, massive cylinder, thrusting out ahead of us. It didn't make any sense.
"What's a power boom?" I asked. "What's a power source doing forward of the bridge?" I should have known. I'm a little slow sometimes.
"Where's that model?" Tara was asking one of the techs. They fumbled around on some shelves, dislodged a blizzard of loose printouts, and Tara had her model. She handed it to me.
It was a dark, delta-shaped dart, spiked with a long, thin projectile that ended in a bulbous nose. A cold hand clutched at my heart. I understood immediately.
"You're looking at the Confederation Ship Dindabai, Wester. Isn't she beautiful?"
"This looks like that Omni ship we hijacked, Tara."
"Of course it does, Wester," she said sweetly. "It all comes from the Star. It all comes from Gildron. It's our bright shining starship, our heavenly chariot. It's the door to the future. It's the gateway to the stars."
"That Omni ship was powered by D-neg. We don't have any D-neg, Tara."
"No, Wester—we don't. But we will. We're going to go and get it, Wester. You, and me, and Gildron, and the Star, and every science freak on Dindabai. We're going to go and get it!"
I laughed in her face, and dropped the model onto the deck. I looked right into her eyes. "You're completely out of your mind, Tara. I can hardly believe this. You're still trying to kill yourself. Give it up, Tara! What the hell is it with you? You've got the damned Star, what else do you want? What does the Legion want? Absolute power over the entire galaxy? Scut! I'm sick of it! This is the craziest thing I've ever heard and sure enough, there you are, right out on the cutting edge. Why have you always got to be out there, Tara? Why the hell don't you just go home, and be happy, and forget the damned Legion?"
"Let me tell you how we're going to do it, Wester."
"No! I don't want to hear it! I don't care! I've had it with your crackpot schemes. I will not help you! I've paid my debt to you, Tara. You got my memory back, I got you the Star. Deal, done, finished! We're even! There's no way I'm going to get involved with this crazy ship or this suicidal mission. My only objective is to get back to Andrion Two. That's all! That's it! You can forget about me, Tara. Get somebody else! I will not help you! Do you hear me? I will not help you!"
"Sure you will, Wester. Calm down!" She flashed me a maddeningly beautiful smile. I stormed out of the chamber, enraged, stumbling over snake pits of wiring, finally making it back down the corridor to the access tunnel.
I paused outside the ship, back on the catwalk overlooking the construction cavern. I could discern the outlines of the ship now that I knew what it was. The great power boom stretched off into the distance, obscured by construction equipment. That's where the D-neg would be—except for the fact that this particular universe did not have any D-neg in it.
"I need you, Wester." She had appeared at my side. I was suddenly too weary to walk away from her.
"You don't need me. Find somebody else. Somebody enthusiastic."
"I need somebody I can depend on, Wester. Somebody experienced. Somebody who can work with Gildron and me. Somebody I can trust. It's you, Wester. There's nobody else. Every fiber of my being tells me it's you."
"Your fibers are wrong. I'm not going. Now go away and stop bothering me."
"Look—there's Gildron!" She leaned over the guardrail, waving like a schoolgirl. Gildron was down below with a group of techs, standing by a massive open cargo door on the bottom of the ship, consulting some printouts. He looked up, saw us, and waved back with a big grin. Tara was beaming, her eyes shining with love. What a difference he made! She might even become human again, in a few years. But until then we were stuck with the old Tara.
"Want to hear how we're going to do it?" she asked.
"No!"
"Remember how disappointed we all were when the O's re-took their ship from us on Andrion, and destroyed it? That ship would have been the key to the future, but it turned out we didn't even need it, Wester. Not so long as we had the Star. Well, we've got the Star back now, Wester, and it's built us this ship. It's an antimat drive starship, but it's something else as well. We've built a D-neg drive capability into it, Wester, guided by the Star. The galaxy will be our back yard, with D-neg. The entire universe will be open to us. Other galaxies, if we want. Anything, Wester. Total power, for the Legion."
"It's not going to do you any good without the D-neg, is it?"
"We know more about other universes now than we ever did before, Wester. We've learned a lot of painful lessons, but we've got our act pretty much together now. You know the principle of antimat drive. The antimat manipulates quantum effects to create an antigravity field that generates negative pressure to cut and hold open a wormhole connection through hyperspace to another portion of our universe, a stargate shortcut to the future. However, if you cut the hyperspace connection in the wrong place, you could get sucked into another universe, and you may never come back, because your efforts to escape will normally just land you back again in another part of the alien universe. Well, there haven't been many accidents lately because we're learning. We're mapping the locations of the interfaces with these different universes. We know all about our little sector of the galaxy. We know where they are. We keep track of them, you see, so we can avoid them. They're moving all the time, but we can track them. We're so good now the sensors in our starships can detect the presence of another universe by distortions in the local spacetime continuum. Again, it's a warning."
"So?"
"The Omni raiding party that destroyed the O ship we had captured came from another universe. We know where that universe is."
"I see."
"That's where the D-neg is, Wester. It's the cosmic glue of the Gods, it's what holds our own universe together even though it's not in our universe. It's starstuff. It's present in some universes, absent in others. We think it's in the universe that O starship came from—and returned to."
"Is th
at so."
"Yes. And, since we know where it is, we can avoid it—if we want to. Or we can zero it—and go into it."
"That's completely insane. Just what do you plan to do once you get there?"
"We're going to seek out the D-neg, Wester, and collect it. It's a natural substance, the Star tells us. Tiny grains of dust, hurtling through the dark. It's out there in the vac, in the space between the stars, in that alien universe. All we need is a microscopic fragment, Wester. A single molecule of this marvelous substance, and all our problems are solved, and the future is ours. It's eternal power, Wester. We'll be immortals, with eternal power. We'll be Gods!" Her eyes were glowing again. I hated it when she got that way. I was getting angry again. I tried to remain calm.
"Tara—even assuming you are able to collect this D-neg without blowing yourself and your starship to atoms, how do you plan on getting back to this universe? I mean, considering that nobody has ever done it before."
"Nothing is easy, Wester. Nothing is risk-free. I admit, there's a danger we may not be able to get back. But we're bringing most of the LC's top science freaks with us. And we're bringing the Star—and Gildron. If things work out, we'll trap the D-neg in aerogel, bleed the active elements off in our reactor, process it, install it in our D-neg drive, and power through back to our own universe. If the D-neg drive works it won't be a problem. That's what D-neg does, Wester. The immense power of D-neg gives us access to other universes."
"And if you don't collect the D-neg, or if you do, but the D-neg drive doesn't work as advertised?"
"We've still got our antimat drive. If it gets us through to the alien universe, it may be able to get us back."
"Or it may not."
"We're not sure. We can't tell, from the information we get from the Star. We're hopeful that we'll be able to track the location and presence of our own universe, once we're in the alien universe, so we can return home on antimat drive, if necessary. Nobody's ever done it, Wester—so we can't be sure. But we wouldn't be risking it if we didn't think it was possible."
Secret of the Legion Page 25