by Pamela Yaye
Evelyn finished off her champagne and pointed the empty wine flute in her husband’s direction. “Howard, would you be a dear and get me another drink?”
Howard was happy to go. It was time for Evelyn and Autumn to have a mother-daughter talk and he wanted to be on the other side of the room if things went sour. He touched his daughter’s shoulder. “We’ll talk later, okay, baby girl?”
Autumn nodded.
“I’ve thought long and hard about your situation,” Evelyn began, “and I have decided to stay out of it. As you so aptly pointed out the last time we spoke, you’ll be thirty on your next birthday and you are capable of running your life. Your father and I are not going to get involved in your love life anymore, even if it’s painfully clear that you need our wisdom and guidance.”
Autumn didn’t believe her mother. It was the champagne talking. Evelyn had given this very speech many times before and once the alcohol wore off, she always reverted to her old tricks.
Evelyn was watching Melissa and Peter pose for pictures at the front of the room, and her expression betrayed her envy. Her eyes widened when she heard Autumn say, “I know you’re disappointed with me and upset that I dumped Tyrell, but I did what I felt was right for me, Mom. Tyrell wasn’t my Mr. Right. He wasn’t even my Mr. Maybe. I tried to love him, but how could I love a thirty-year-old man who mooches off his parents, deals with shady people and runs all over the city with different women?”
Evelyn’s eyes widened. “Did Tyrell cheat on you?”
Autumn looked away from her mother’s gaze.
Evelyn was reminded of all the times she had pleaded with Autumn to take Tyrell back. Now, she finally understood Autumn’s reluctance. Fighting off angry tears, she reached across the table and covered her daughter’s hand with her own. “You know I only wanted what was best for you. You think I was pushing you towards Tyrell so we could become part of the Wellman family, but that wasn’t it. I just want to see you fall in love, get married and give me tons of grandbabies. Is that so wrong? The first five years of our marriage, your father and I struggled to pay the bills, put food on the table and take care of you kids, and I don’t want the same fate for you.” Tears stood in her eyes, and before she could reach into her beaded purse for a tissue, one streaked down her cheek. She brushed it away, and squeezed her daughter’s hands. “But I can see now that you’re doing just fine. You can take care of yourself. Married or not.” She paused. “From now on, no more meddling. I promise.”
Autumn came around the table and embraced her mother. “I’m glad we had this little chat,” she admitted, pressing her lips against Evelyn’s damp cheek. She smiled when her mother kissed her back. “It’s been a long time since we were able to talk like this and I missed that, Mom.”
“Me, too, dear, and from now on, I’m going to keep my nose on my face and out of your business. No more yelling. No more wheedling. And no more talk of you getting back together with Tyrell.”
Autumn felt the need to lighten the mood. Her mother looked as though she could use a laugh. She pointed to a cameraman who had picked that time to turn his lens on them, and said good-naturedly, “I’m going to hold you to that, Mom! And if you ever fall off the wagon, I’m going to play back that tape!” Both women burst into laughter.
When Autumn sobered, she gave Evelyn another quick hug. “I value your opinion, Mom, and I love you with all my heart.”
“I love you, too, dear.” Evelyn was clearly relieved that they had cleared the air. Her eyes brightened as she cast them around the restaurant. “One more thing. Do your mom a favor and take a good look around the room.” As Autumn did, Evelyn dropped her hands on the table and lowered her voice to a whisper. “I’m not trying to be in your business again, but is there anyone here who catches your eye?”
Autumn felt as though a fifty-pound weight had been lifted off her chest. Speaking from the heart and unburdening the soul was a freeing experience and with this newfound freedom, she was ready to face the man she loved. She was searching the banquet room for L.J., half listening to Yvette, when Melissa pranced over wearing the toothiest of smiles.
“Guess what I did?” It wasn’t a rhetorical question, so Melissa rushed on. “I swapped the name cards! Now L.J. is safely tucked away at another table.”
Autumn smiled softly, her heart overflowing with love for her best friend. She and Melissa didn’t often see eye-to-eye, and they argued like an old married couple, but they came through for each other when it mattered most. It was at times like this that Autumn realized how fortunate she was that Melissa Renee Grisbey was her best friend.
Yvette wiped imaginary sweat from her brow. “Good thinking, Mel, because I was wondering how she was going to cope with L.J. sitting beside her all night. She’s been jittery and edgy since we got here and we haven’t even sat down to eat yet!”
“I know,” Melissa said. “I saw when you guys walked in. She almost wiped out on the floor! It’s a good thing she was holding on to you.”
Autumn shook her head. They were talking about her as if she was senile. Or deaf. She crossed her arms across her chest and ordered, “Cut it out you two.”
The bride shrugged off the rebuke. “We’re just trying to help.”
“I know, and I appreciate it. I really do.” But she didn’t. Deep down, Autumn was disappointed. She had been looking forward to talking to L.J. over the course of the night. In the six weeks they had dated, she had gotten accustomed to him being by her side. Whenever they were together, he had whispered funny jokes in her ear, found some reason to touch her and made her feel like the most beautiful woman in the world. “So, which table is L.J. at now?” Autumn asked before Melissa could bounce off.
“Number sixteen.” Then, “Omar will be taking his spot.”
Autumn fashioned her lips into a smile. “Thanks, Mel.”
Melissa wrapped her in a tight hug. “What are friends for?”
L.J. was dying to know what was going on at table number four. Autumn had been in a fit of hysterics ever since Omar had taken the seat beside her and from where he was sitting, it looked like they were flirting with one another. When Omar leaned over and whispered something in her ear and her laugh floated across the room and tickled his ears, L.J. swore under his breath. He had half a mind to go over there and retake his spot.
He had been in a stew ever since Peter had joined him at the bar, tapped him on the shoulder and said, “There’s been a slight seating-arrangement change. You’re going to be eating at table number sixteen.”
“I happen to like where I’m sitting now.”
“The spots have already been switched.”
“Change it back.”
“Sorry, bro, but my hands are tied.”
Translation: Melissa would squash him like an ant if he defied her orders.
L.J. slumped back in his chair. Just thinking about the way he had been shuffled away made him want to punch a hole into one of the four walls. Thoughts of leaving the dinner and going home made their way back into his mind. He hated the way he was feeling, but he didn’t know how to snap out of it. And, as the evening wore on and he listened to one emotional speech after another about the bride and groom, his mood worsened. He didn’t care what anyone said. This love thing was grossly overrated.
By the time the emcee called on him to toast the groom, he was in a bad state.
Mulling over what he wanted to say, he slowly got to his feet. L.J. steadied his nerves. He could do this. It was just a two-minute speech. How hard could it be? He didn’t know if he was nervous about the speech, or about having Autumn staring at him, but his palms were damp and the muscles in his throat were tight.
After a few deep breaths, he was ready. He opened his mouth to begin but when his eyes fell across Autumn, he closed it. For a half minute they stared. Her eyes were blank, but when she smiled softly in his direction, L.J. could feel the dark cloud lifting from his heart. And just like that, he felt better. Without even saying a word, Autumn had brigh
tened his mood and filled him with hope.
When he finally spoke, his voice carried across the room with ease. “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I’m L.J. Saunders. Best friend of the groom. And for those of you who don’t know who I am, let me start by clearing up any confusion there might be. I’m not a defensive lineman in the NFL, a pro wrestler or a bodybuilder.” Everyone laughed, including the woman in the canary-yellow dress. Emboldened by her smile, he continued.
“I know this is going to come as a shock to many of you, but there was once a time when I looked up to Peter. Literally. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s true.” More laughter. Peter was of average height and physically fit, but when he stood next to his best friend, his body looked sadly under-developed. L.J. went on to share an amusing story about how Peter had saved him from the school bully when he was in the sixth grade. He finished by thanking the Delancy family for taking him into their home and treating him like a part of their family. He finished to thunderous applause. Everyone stood and raised their wineglasses to toast the bride and groom.
“Thank you, L.J., for that moving toast,” Mrs. Delancy said, returning to the podium. “Our family loves you, too, son.” The chunky, dark-skinned woman blew him a kiss. In the next breath, she faced the audience and said, “It’s time for dessert. Everyone please help yourself.”
L.J. didn’t want any dessert, but he could use something stronger to drink than white wine. He got into the slow-moving bar line and struck up a conversation with the elderly man standing ahead of him. But when he caught sight of Autumn, he stopped talking in midsentence. For the second time that night, he was rendered speechless. She was alone at her table. No Omar. No Yvette. No smooth-talking brothers trying to hit on her. This would probably be his only chance to talk to her without a gang of spectators.
The desire to do right by her, and to be the only man who made her laugh, propelled him through the crowd and by the time he pulled up behind her chair, he was short of breath. He had almost broken his neck trying to get to her. L.J. was shaking on the inside, but he wanted to appear cool and composed on the outside. He straightened his suit, smoothed his hand over his tie and reminded himself that this was the woman he loved.
When L.J. spoke, it was with confidence. “There are no words to describe how you look tonight, Autumn. But let me try. Beautiful, stunning and exquisite all come to mind.” He quickly added, “And I love what you’ve done to your hair.” Her signature braids were gone, her dark-brown mane pulled into an elegant updo. He wanted to twirl his fingers around one of the loose curls grazing the back of her neck, but didn’t. Instead, he put his hands into his pocket and took a much-needed deep breath.
Autumn didn’t turn around. “I didn’t think you cared.”
“Of course I care.”
“You have a funny way of showing it.”
“Don’t say that,” he chided, planting himself in the seat beside her. “You know I care about you.” He waited for Autumn to say something. When she remained mute he said, “We need to talk. Can we go somewhere quiet and—”
“Why? We talked on Wednesday. Oh, I forgot,” she said in an exaggerated tone of voice. “You didn’t say anything.”
L.J. wished he had waited for that drink. His throat was bone-dry and he couldn’t think of a single thing to say in response. Just three days ago, they had eaten dinner under the moonlight and then Autumn had seduced him with her dance moves at the hottest nightclub in the city. Now she couldn’t even look at him.
He searched her face. Slanted eyes. Puckered lips. Tension working its way through her jaw. She was upset and angry and hurt, but deep down he believed she loved him. She had said so herself just forty-eight hours earlier. “The choice is yours to make, Autumn. We can slip outside and talk in private, or we can sit right here. But I’m not leaving until you hear what I have to say.”
She knew from past experience L.J. was used to having things his way. His chin was set firm in determination, his eyes narrowed and his facial muscles stiff. L.J. was serious. Dead serious.
Autumn scanned the crowd. Things were finally back to normal with her parents, but if they saw her with L.J. there was no telling what would happen. She saw them beside the podium, chatting with another Black couple. Weighing her options, she glanced at the banquet-room doors. She could slip out of the room, talk to L.J. and return before anyone noticed her absence. She dreaded going back outside into that heat, but it was better to go outside than to sit at the table arguing for the whole world to see. Autumn pushed back her chair, wrangled her shawl from the back of it and without so much as a smile, barked, “Let’s go.”
Chapter 19
“Well, out with it,” Autumn prompted, not wanting to waste any time. “What do you have to say?” She pushed an errant curl off her forehead. The humidity was going to kill her bouncy spiral curls, but there was nothing she could do about it now. She had already agreed to hear L.J. out.
The warm breeze whirled dust around the parking lot, and patrons sprinted inside as if they were being pursued by a cyclone. The sun was making its descent, the sky a stunning deep orange and pink. It was the perfect night for watching the sunset curled up in a lover’s arms, specifically one with bulging muscles and a rock-hard chest. Autumn booted the thought from her mind. There would be no cuddling tonight, or any other night. She was going to give L.J. five minutes to speak his piece, then return to the party.
L.J. dragged a hand down his face. This was going to be more difficult than he had thought. Autumn looked as if she was ready for battle: her shoulders were squared, her legs parted defensively and her arms crossed forbiddingly under her chest. She was wearing the same scent she’d been wearing the day he’d stopped to help her and just the memory of that hot, sunny afternoon brought a warm smile to his lips.
“What are you smiling about?”
L.J. washed the smile off his face. “I’m sorry if I hurt you,” he began in an unsteady tone. “Causing you pain was never my intention, Autumn. Why would I want to hurt the woman who leaves adorable notes on my pillow, makes the best Western omelette I’ve ever had and laughs at all my corny-ass jokes?”
Autumn was slow to respond. His smile made her want to wrap herself up in his arms. She could feel her anger floating away on the wind but refused to allow herself to move any closer. Unwilling to forgive and forget just yet, she shaved the attitude off her voice, but maintained her physical stance. “If all that is true, then why did you freak out when I said I loved you?”
L.J.’s heart swelled. She had said it again. She loved him. A fist-size ball of emotion suddenly obstructed his airway. He coughed a few times, but it didn’t restore his voice. He sucked in some air and exhaled slowly. “When I saw you with Tyrell, I thought you wanted to get back together with him. I figured with me in Atlanta and you getting cozy to your ex I might as well just forget about the possibility of us. So, when you said you loved me, I didn’t believe you.”
Autumn could hear violin strings plucking. His explanation had more holes in it than a pair of fishnet stockings. She hoped he didn’t think she was buying this. Ready to protest, she opened her mouth, but L.J. silenced her with a sharp look.
“Let me finish, Autumn. When you said you loved me, I panicked. That was the last thing I expected you to say, and to be brutally honest, I didn’t believe you. Not for a minute. Five seconds before your confession you were snuggled up with Tyrell, practically—”
“Hold up,” Autumn interrupted, unable to hold her tongue any longer. “Tyrell has nothing to do with this.”
“Of course he does! You broke up with him the very day we met and he’s been trying to win you back ever since. When I got to your place Wednesday night and saw you in his arms, I felt like the biggest fool who’d ever walked the earth. I’ve been the rebound guy before and I didn’t want to be another temporary replacement again.”
When she huffed, he added, “Put yourself in my shoes. How would you feel? What would you think if you showed up at my plac
e and my ex-girlfriend had her hands all over me? How confident would you be?”
Autumn shot a look of contempt his way. “I told you Tyrell and I were over long before you came along,” she said.
“Then why didn’t you make a clean break from him? Why would you continue dating someone who has proven time and time again that he doesn’t give a damn about you?”
“I don’t know.”
“If you can’t be honest about what’s really going between you and Tyrell, then there’s really nothing more for us to discuss.”
Autumn blinked hard. Is he serious? Does he really think I want Tyrell? Her eyes took in his lowered eyebrows and his rigid posture. Now everything made sense. L.J. thought there was a possibility she would take Tyrell back. He thought she was playing both sides of the fence. Toying with his emotions. Autumn’s hands dropped to her side, and she clasped them in front of her. She could only blame herself for the mix-up. She should have been more up-front instead of simplifying the demise of her relationship with Tyrell. Now, her half truths were coming back to haunt her.
She had to make him believe that Tyrell never did and never would mean anything to her. She ran through what she wanted to say and what she should say, but when she opened her mouth she spoke from the heart. “I continued dating Tyrell, even after I found out he was running around on me, because I didn’t have the strength to move on.”
“So, you’re not in love with him?” The excitement in L.J.’s voice and the glimmer in his eyes were unmistakable.
“Haven’t you been listening?” she teased. When his face broke out into the widest smile she had seen to date, she said, “How can I be with Tyrell, or anyone one else for that matter, when I love you?”
L.J. was in her space before she could finish. He tilted her chin, cupped it in the palm of his hands and kissed her passionately. It was as if he was making up for the past two days with his lips. The kiss was so intense and so sensuous Autumn hankered for the privacy of her apartment. Breaking the kiss before they ended up tearing each other’s clothes off right then and there, Autumn dropped her head to L.J.’s chest. They were going to make it. She loved him and he loved her. But before they went riding off into the sunset, there was something else she needed to know.