by Cat Johnson
“I’m a tank commander in the sandbox, sir. My language skills suck. I can shoot but I’m no sharpshooter. I’m good but—”
“I’m not here for your language or your shooting skills. We already have plenty of men who can cover that area. You have unique skills of your own, Blake. Things that can’t be taught.”
John had no idea what those skills could be, but he had never heard of an enlisted Army man being plucked out of a deployment by a Black OPS recruiter. “Don’t you guys usually go for the super soldier Delta Force types?”
Commander Miller laughed. “Sometimes. And sometimes a man distinguishes himself for other reasons. Your successful training of the Iraqi army recruits your last tour here flagged you. We’ve been watching you since then.”
Flagged him? Shit. And they had been watching him? Since his last tour? And who exactly were they?
“You handle yourself well under pressure. You not only are able to lead, but men actually want to follow you. The lieutenant can’t say enough about you, your natural instincts, your experience here with the insurgents.” The commander smiled. “He says you even think like the bad guys. You know what they’ll do before they know themselves. That is a skill I can’t teach, Blake. And it’s an invaluable one.”
“I don’t know what to say, sir.” John let out a wry laugh. “I’m not even sure exactly what you want from me at this point.”
The commander nodded. “Understood. I’m not asking you to give up your position and fly home with me today. But I did want you to start thinking about it. Your tour here is up very soon.”
“If we aren’t extended again, sir,” John clarified.
“You’re not being extended.” Commander Miller said it with a surety that surprised John. He did his best to hide that as the man continued. “I’ll arrange to have you sent to the States directly from Germany rather than follow the rest of the platoon to the garrison at Hohenfels. You can spend some time with the teams and me. Join us for a few trainings. Let me see what you’re made of. Give you a taste of what it would be like should we make this offer official, and should you decide to take the position.”
The United States. How many times during the long months here and back in Germany had John dreamed of being back in the US permanently? He couldn’t count.
“Any questions, Blake?”
Just a few hundred or so. He picked one and went with that. “Exactly which teams are we talking here, sir?”
Hank Miller grinned wide at him. “None you’ve ever heard of, soldier.” He rose and then added, “One more thing. You and I never spoke. Understood?”
John raised a brow. “Yes, sir. Of course.”
“I’ll be in touch.” Smiling, Miller shook his hand. Then he disappeared out the door, and as far as John knew, from the camp itself. Just like a ghost. There was a reason these guys were sometimes referred to as spooks. And John had never pictured himself as one of them.
Shit. Black OPS. Men who for all intents and purposes did not exist. What the hell had he gotten himself into? And what did it mean for his budding relationship with Maureen?
Chapter Fourteen
“Private. Can I ask you a quick question?”
“Yes, sir.”
“How does this instant messenger thing work?” John felt his face growing warm, as if the still-wet-behind-the-ears soldier standing next to him in the MWR knew exactly what naughty things he wanted to do with Maureen online.
Actually, he would just be happy to chat with her. If she owned a webcam it would be so good just to see her smile or laugh, clothed or not, he didn’t care. If things got a little hotter, that wouldn’t be bad either. Hotter, in the middle of the MWR. What the fuck was he thinking? This wasn’t his style. Hell, after being deployed for so long and so many times, did he even have a dating style?
The young kid, who probably wasn’t even old enough to drink legally in the States, grinned. “It’s easy, sir. When you get online I’ll show you.”
It had been a good decision to ask for help from someone who had been born into the cyber generation, but John began to question the whole thing. Too late though. Within minutes John was set up with his own ID, and an instant messenger browser opened in front of him. He typed in Maureen’s email address, and the program sent an email to her saying he wanted to be added to her contact list.
Yeah, he wanted to be added to her contact list all right and a lot more.
He had figured out the time difference and gone to the MWR when Maureen was most likely to be at home and online. His planning paid off. In only a few minutes a window popped up.
“Wow. Hi.” Maureen was there, live and writing to him.
The way his heart pounded, you would think she was right there in the room with him instead of thousands of miles away.
The distance didn’t matter, and he still felt like he was going out on a limb when he decided to try flirting with her.
“Hi back,” he typed, unable to come up with anything more clever in his current state. “How are you?”
“Better for hearing from you.” She responded immediately.
He swallowed hard. She was so perfect even her IMs were sweet. He wanted to see her so badly. “You don’t happen to own a webcam, do you?”
“No. But I will buy one tomorrow.”
John laughed. Damn, this was too easy. He almost felt like a perv. “That would be nice. I want to see your smile.”
“I smile a lot when it comes to you.”
His heart skipped a beat. Suddenly this wasn’t enough. This computer stuff wasn’t really him anyway. “Maureen. I have access to a phone in the office. Could I call you sometime?”
“Yes. When?”
With a tightness in his throat, he typed, “Now?”
The many digits of her phone number appeared before him, and John scrambled to get his pen out of his pocket.
“I’m going to try and call right now but it might take a bit to get through. Wait for me?”
“Okay. I’m waiting.”
She was waiting. Oh man. His pulse raced, and it wasn’t from the sprint to the office either.
Luckily there was no one around at this hour. He closed the office door and sat at the desk, realizing his knees felt weak. He dialed the number slowly with fingers that shook. When the ringing began he panicked, second-guessing this decision until he heard her voice on the other end of the static.
“Hello?”
It was more beautiful than he’d dreamed, like an angel whispering in his ear. He finally remembered to respond.
“Maureen? It’s John.” His voice sounded high pitched and funny from nerves. John cleared his throat.
She giggled. “Yeah, I kind of figured.”
He could hear the smile in her voice.
“It’s really nice to talk to you.” God, he wanted to say so much more.
“It’s nice to talk to you too. Kind of funny, actually. I can’t believe you can call all the way from Iraq. But I guess it’s no more amazing than the fact you have Internet there.” She hesitated, and he heard her laugh cut through the static. John would do anything to hear her in person, but for now, this would do. “I’m sorry. I babble when I’m nervous.”
Thank God, she was nervous too. “That’s okay. I like listening to you. I love your voice. It doesn’t matter what you’re saying.”
“Really? I always thought I sounded like a little girl on the phone.”
“No, you sound like an angel.” Was that too forward? There was silence on the other end of the phone for what seemed like a long time.
Finally, she cleared her throat. “John?”
“Yeah?” He swallowed hard, fear welling within him.
“Can we really meet in person?”
He couldn’t tell her about the mysterious man in black’s invitation, but he could tell her this. “Yes. I’ll do whatever I need to.”
“Good. I’d like that. And I mean if you just want to meet as friends, that’s fine. I know you joked about a
date but you don’t have to—”
“I want to. Do you?”
“Yes.”
The breath he’d been holding whooshed out. “Good.” Relieved and with the weight of doubt lifted, he felt so light he was almost giddy. “So, tell me what you’re doing right now. Remind me what’s it like to be home and normal.”
She laughed. “Um, well. I’d like to tell you I’m lying around with my hair done and makeup on in some sexy lingerie eating bon bons or something…”
He smiled at the image, knowing it wasn’t Maureen. “But?”
“But I’m really in bed with my laptop. I’m wearing my favorite flannel pajamas that I fear aren’t long for this world because I’ve worn them so much the butt is wearing thin. My hair’s in a ponytail, and there’s a bowl of microwave popcorn next to me.”
His smile grew wider as he pictured her like that. “I like that idea even better than the first one. I wish I was there with you.”
“You do?”
John sighed. “More than you can imagine.”
“What would you be doing if you were here?” Her voice had dropped lower. It was softer, sexier.
Was she asking for what he thought she was asking? If he told her what he really wanted to do, it would change things forever between them. They’d cross a line and there’d be no going back.
He stepped across that invisible line. “I’d probably try to be a gentleman, but Maureen, I have to be honest. I don’t think I’d be able to for very long.”
Holding his breath, he waited.
“And when you failed miserably at being a gentleman, what would you do?”
His heart thundered. “Take your face in my hands and kiss you.” John imagined how warm her mouth would feel against his tongue. “I’d unbutton that pajama top until I could see and touch your beautiful soft skin, then I’d taste it.”
He heard her soft, “Yes.”
“I want to feel your heart pounding as I take your breast in my mouth. I’ve been thinking of that since you first sent me your picture.”
“Mmm. John?”
“Yeah.” He was sounding as breathless as she was. He absently adjusted the rock-hard erection in his pants.
“I have a toy.” She hesitated. “Do you want me to, um, get it out?”
“Yes.” Damn, he was hard enough to drive nails. “What kind is it? I mean, describe it.”
He heard rustling and could only imagine she was getting it. Not that he could hear much between the static on the line and the sound of his pulse rushing in his ears.
“It kind of looks like a man’s…you know, but it has a part up top that vibrates.”
Oh God. He stroked himself harder through his pants, trying to decide if he dared risk unbuttoning them.
“Imagine it’s me, Maureen. That I’m sliding into you, stroking you to orgasm, hitting you just right—” The sound of buzzing had him stopping in mid sentence. She’d turned it on. He thought his head might explode at that knowledge. He only hoped it didn’t until after he’d heard her come. “Uh, imagine I reach between us as I lie above you, finding the perfect spot and rubbing it—”
Maureen let out a small cry and then, “John?”
“Keep going, Maureen.”
“But it’s been a while. I won’t last… Oh God.” She breathed heavy, panting into the phone.
“Don’t hold back. You don’t need to last. Just come.”
She did, loud and sweet and right in his ear. He closed his eyes and pressed the phone closer to absorb the nuance of every sound she made. He could picture it. Him above her, her face contorted in pleasure. Her muscles squeezing his cock inside her.
He was getting to New York to see her even if he had to go AWOL to do it. He couldn’t live much longer without being with this woman. Like a Siren, her voice had captured him, and he had no hope or desire to get free.
Her cries calmed until there was only the sound of her breathing. “Oh my God.”
He smiled. “That was really nice.”
And wasn’t that the understatement of the century.
“Did you? Could you?”
“Not here, but I will later.” He laughed. “Believe me, I will.” He’d almost come just listening to her.
“Are things going to be weird between us now?” There was concern in her voice.
“No. We’ve been heading toward this for a while now, Maureen. It was only a matter of time before it happened. Hell, I dream of making love to you. If I’d been anywhere where I could have gotten to you, we’d be dating by now.”
There was no doubt in his mind.
“You dream about me?”
“Yeah.”
“Me too. About you.”
John smiled. “Was I good?”
She let out a small laugh. “Yes, but I woke up before the best part. But it’s okay. It was worth the wait for this. I just wish you could have… I want to hear you.”
He swallowed. How could he resist that statement? “Hang on.”
“Okay.”
John laid the phone on the desk and walked to the door. He looked out into the hall. No one. It was late. No one would know. John closed and locked the door.
After sitting, he rolled the chair under the desk and undid the buttons of his cammies. He spit into his palm and grabbed himself, then grabbed the phone with his other hand and cradled it against his shoulder. “You still there?”
“Yes.” There was that voice again. The one that melted him from the inside out.
He swallowed hard. “Slide the toy back in.”
“Okay.”
He heard the buzzing begin again and groaned. “It’s not going to take me long.”
“Good.”
He smiled, wondering if she’d feel the same about that if they were really making love. He stroked himself hard and fast, listening to every sound she made. Pre-come glistened on the tip as he pumped.
A cry tore from her throat that had his balls tingling. “Yes, Maureen.”
“Come with me.” She delivered the order and that was all it took.
“Yes.” John gritted the words out through clenched teeth. “Coming.”
He managed to aim beneath the desk into the garbage pail half filled with wadded up paper, which was good since with Maureen’s voice as inspiration, it seemed as if he’d come more and for longer than ever before.
He was still trembling, and they were both breathing heavily into the phone, when after a moment she finally said, “I loved doing that with you.”
Good, because he’d happily do it again and often.
“Me too.” He managed to get his pants secured again as the static got louder and reminded John connections had a habit of cutting out around there. “I hate to have to do this, but I should probably say goodbye. The phones here suck, and the connection’s getting worse.”
“Okay.” There was disappointment in her tone even though he could tell she tried to hide it.
He hated hanging up, but it was getting harder to understand her words. It was too frustrating to not be able to hear clearly the voice that had further captivated him after the woman already had. “I’ll look for you online tomorrow, and maybe if you’re home I’ll call again. If that’s okay.”
“Definitely,” she agreed.
“Okay. Good. Goodbye for now?”
“Bye for now.”
The call ended with a click and an end to the static. John drew in a shaky breath and let it out as he replaced the receiver. His head was still spinning with all that had happened. Her voice still echoed through his ears. He could hear it so clearly, simply remembering the sound of her coming sent a shiver down his spine.
What would meeting her in real life do to him if a phone call did this? If Commander Miller came through with his promise, John could be back in the United States, at least for a little while, in a few weeks. After what had happened today, he would get himself to Maureen. Somehow, some way.
Yet in the back of his consciousness the fear of meeting he
r in real life—that things would be different somehow—niggled itself into the bliss clouding his brain.
That was a worry for later. Right now he had to rest and then keep himself alive and in one piece for the remainder of this deployment to even get to Maureen.
Maureen sat at her desk the next morning with not one brain cell focused on her job. Instead, she relived over and over in her mind the night before with John. They had crossed that line—the one from friendship to lovers.
And wow, it had been incredible. Beautiful and hot at the same time. Perfect. If making love to the man in person was as good as it had been on the phone, she was in big trouble.
Obsessed now, Maureen reached for her mouse and opened a new browser to check for a message from John…until a shadow fell across her desk.
She closed down the window and spun in her chair. “Tiffany. Hi. What’s up? Long time no talk.”
Yes, she was babbling nervously at almost being caught, but she doubted self-centered Tiffany would notice.
Or maybe she would. With a suspicious frown, Tiffany asked, “What’s up with you today?”
“Up? Nothing’s up. Why would you think something is up?”
Squinting, Tiffany said, “You’re smiling a lot and acting funny.”
“Am I? Nope, nothing up with me. What’s up with you? How’s the wedding plans going? Set a date yet?”
Tiffany shrugged. “I haven’t set a date. In fact, I’m not all that sure it’s going to work out.”
Well, now. This was interesting news. “Really? Why?”
“When he retires, he expects me to quit my job and move upstate, near Canada of all places.”
Maureen raised a brow. Yeah, bikini-clad city-girl Tiffany in snowy upstate New York was a tough sell. Smothering a smile, Maureen scrambled for something to say. “Well, maybe you should have stuck with the Texan. Texas is nice.”
“Yeah, that wouldn’t have been too bad, but it’s over with him. I cut him loose, you know. He just wasn’t for me. But you know what else is the problem with all these military guys? I looked up what military men make. It’s really crap. I make more than that here at this stupid job.”
Wow. Tiffany had actually done some research. It was for all the wrong reasons but still, the effort was there. Perhaps she should have done it before getting engaged though.