He found his mother sitting on a chair. Her eyes were open, and there was a clarity to them he hadn’t seen in quite some time.
He glanced over at Keva, but she didn’t say anything.
“How long ago did you find her?”
“Like I said, found her earlier in the week. She was wandering, and though she was underdressed, she was more alert than she has been in quite some time.”
“How do you know how clear my mother has been?”
It came out harsher than he intended, but it troubled him that someone like Keva would even make the claim that she understood anything about his mother. How could she when so many had abandoned his family after his father’s death?
“It’s not as if I don’t check in with Kayla. Then again, you’re gone hunting during the day, so you haven’t seen I stop by most weeks.”
Jason breathed out heavily. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it to sound like that.”
“I understand. You care about your mother. And I think everything you’ve done for your family is incredible. I wish others in the village could help, I really do. It’s just…” She shook her head.
He knew what it was. He knew why she wasn’t able to help any more than she had. And he knew that despite her best intentions, there wouldn’t be anything more that she could even offer him.
Jason stepped in, ignoring the glowing hearth. Firewood crackled, and he tried not to think about where she would’ve acquired that, and he crouched down in front of his mother. He took her hand, looking up into her deep brown eyes.
“Mother?”
“Jason. Where have you been?”
“Kayla and I have been hunting. We thought that it was time for us to take you home,” he said.
“Did you catch anything?”
He glanced over at Keva before turning his back to his mother. “We did. You’ll be quite impressed.”
He was tempted to wrap an illusion around her, to do anything he could in order to hold safety around her and protect her, but with Keva being here, he wasn’t sure that he could or should.
“What did you catch?”
“Enough for us to eat for several weeks,” Jason said.
His mother smiled. “Keva wouldn’t let me go to my shop. She said I needed to stay here until you came.”
“Is that right?”
“I think she’s trying to protect me, but I’ve been telling her she has no need to.”
Jason smiled again. If only that were the case. “Kayla and I are here, Mother.”
“That’s good. What about your father? Has he returned from his hunt?”
“Father?” Jason blinked, glancing around. “You know that Father…” He shook his head. Maybe now wasn’t the time to reinforce what had happened to his father. Maybe now wasn’t the time to remind her of everything that they had lost.
And yet, he didn’t know when the time would be. He didn’t know what his mother would be able to understand or what she would be able to tolerate, but the more that he thought about it, the more certain he was that she needed to be brought away.
Perhaps he could protect her, to ease her out of this confusion, but even if he could, he wasn’t sure what it would take. Would it involve using an illusion? Would it involve using a healing? Or maybe there would be somebody in Dragon Haven who might be able to offer something he hadn’t been able to. All of it was challenging, but all of it was necessary.
And as soon as he brought his mother away, as soon as he and Kayla returned to Dragon Haven, he would be free to stop worrying.
Then again, Jason knew he would never stop worrying. He would always have to fear what might happen to his sister and his mother, and he would always fear what might happen to others he cared about. Now that he was given the ability to use power, he couldn’t help but think that power had a certain responsibility. He accepted that.
“Thank you for keeping her here,” he said, turning to Keva. “I think Kayla and I can manage from here.”
“You know I care about your family, Jason.”
“I understand,” he said.
“I’m not sure you do. I care. I care that your father was lost. I care that your mother has become… This. I care that you and your sister have suffered.”
“I know you do.”
Even as he said it, he couldn’t hide the disgust in his voice. Considering everything that had happened to his family, the way the village had treated them, he couldn’t help but feel as if he were angry.
With that sensation, his hand began to burn. The iron dragon glove began to heat, drawing power from the iron dragon, and he pushed it away, determined to ignore it. There was no point in allowing himself that anger and rage. It was there, burning within him, but holding on to it was useless.
And why should he hold on to it? There was no point in doing so, and all that it did was continue to build more hatred. More rage.
“Come on, Mother,” he said. He guided her to stand, and she followed him to the door. She smiled at Keva, and the two of them exchanged a look for a moment, and then they stepped out into the swirling snow.
Jason wrapped the snow around them, intensifying the illusion, holding on to it as tightly as he could. He intended to maintain it for as long as he could, and as the illusion formed around him, swirling with intensity, he breathed it in as he gathered more strength within it.
His mother followed him, and they headed through the village, back toward their home. “What did you catch?” his mother asked.
“What was that?”
“You said your hunt was successful. What did you catch?”
Jason turned to his mother, squeezing her hands. “I’m not sure you’ll believe it.”
They reached the home, and once there, he found Kayla sitting inside. She looked up when he opened the door, and her eyes widened. Lurching to her feet, she raced over to their mother, wrapping her arms around her.
“Where was she?”
“She was with Keva,” he said.
“Why would she have been there?”
“I…”
He didn’t want to let his sister know their mother had been there because they hadn’t been. Because he hadn’t been. That would only upset her, and she had enough on her mind as it was, and he didn’t want her to worry about anything more.
“I think she was worried about Mother,” he said.
“If she was so worried about her, then she would have done something more when she came to visit.”
“I didn’t even realize she came to visit.”
“You go off hunting. You don’t know how people check in on her.”
“Others have, as well?”
“Most days we get a visitor or two.”
“Don’t they ever offer anything?”
“What is there to offer?” Kayla looked over at her mother for a moment before turning her attention back to Jason. “When Father first died, they offered quite a bit of things. They offered help. They offered food. They offered dung to burn. Most of the time, you were able to catch enough so that we didn’t need to rely upon anyone else for such kindness, but even that wasn’t always enough.”
Jason remembered those early days. He’d been so focused on trying to keep up, trying to hunt and do whatever it would take to feed his family, that he had barely spent any time in the village. It was his way of mourning, but it had taken him away from his sister and his mother.
What if some of the withdrawal was his fault? His mother had abandoned them, but Jason had done the same thing.
“I’m so sorry,” he said.
“Why are you sorry?”
“I wasn’t there for you when you needed me to be,” he said.
“I don’t blame you for it.”
“No. You probably don’t. I can’t help but feel as if I should have been there for you, that you needed me but I wasn’t there.”
“If you hadn’t gone off hunting, I don’t know what would’ve happened.”
He sighed. “It sounds as if we w
ould’ve been fine.”
Despite everything else, Jason hadn’t thought that they would. He had believed he’d needed to do what he had, that he’d needed to go and hunt and gather and collect as much as he could to keep them alive, but he’d also believed no one else within the village offered any help.
Perhaps had they taken the villagers up on their offers, his mother would have come out of her shell sooner. Jason wouldn’t have had to run off and hunt as he had. He wouldn’t have had to abandon his family, isolate them, and he wouldn’t have had to leave his sister alone with his mother, worrying, and he wouldn’t have had to wonder whether or not they would have enough food.
Despite that, he had been responsible for keeping them alive. In the times when food was scarce for the rest the village, Jason had continued to hunt, and he had managed to acquire enough. What would’ve happened had he not gone off on those hunts? Would the rest of the villagers have been as willing to share?
Seeing as how others had stolen from them, he doubted that.
“I think it’s time for us to get going,” he said.
“Do you think she’ll be okay with that?”
Jason looked over at his mother. She was more alert than she had been in quite some time, though he could tell that she still wasn’t entirely there with them.
“I can do something to help ease her through this, but I don’t know how much I should do.”
“Don’t let her suffer,” Kayla said.
“I would never let her suffer.”
“I know that you wouldn’t, but…”
Jason grabbed his sister and hugged her.
When he stepped back, tears streamed down her eyes.
“I want to be gone from here,” she whispered.
“Then we will be.”
“I don’t know that I want to return.”
“Then you don’t have to,” he said.
“I feel guilty about it,” she said.
“I understand.”
“Why did you keep coming back?”
“Because of you. Because of Mother. Because—” Jason wasn’t even sure why he had continued to come back. It certainly wasn’t for the rest of the villagers. There were people like Reltash and his friends who had abused him, but they had done so because he was different. Would it be the same anywhere else? “I guess mostly because of you and Mother. And now we’re going to go somewhere else. We’ll find safety.”
“What if there is no real safety?” she whispered.
“There will be.”
“How can you promise that? The Dragon Souls have already attacked there.”
“Dragon Souls?”
His mother stiffened when she spoke the words, and it seemed almost as if she recognized them.
“Mother?”
Something faded from her, as she went silent again.
Jason turned to his mother, glancing at Kayla, but he had no idea what had just happened.
“It’s time for us to get going.”
“Is there anything you need from here?” Kayla asked.
Jason scanned the inside of the dwelling. It had been that. A place for them to sleep. To eat. Since his father’s passing, it had been nothing else. The qualities that had made it a home were missing.
“I don’t think so. And besides, if I think of anything I need, I can always return.”
“You can, but I won’t.”
He nodded.
Stepping out of the home, they headed out into the cold and the night. Jason maintained a connection around his mother, using his tie to the iron dragon, but he also held on to an illusion, wrapping a sense of cold around her that she wouldn’t necessarily feel.
As he worked, he wanted to ensure she would not suffer, that she would not know where they were going or what they were going to see, and the longer that he worked, the more certain he was that he was able to hold on to it.
Then they reached the ice dragon.
Ice blue eyes stared at them through the swirling snow, and Jason stepped over to him, patting him on the side, and between him and Kayla, they helped their mother onto the dragon. As far as she could tell, they were basically climbing stairs, nothing more, and when she settled down on the dragon’s back, it was as if she were lying on a bed. Kayla watched him, frowning, and Jason shook his head. At least if nothing else, his connection to the forest dragon gave him the ability to protect his mother and prevent her from knowing everything that she might experience. His connection enabled him to keep his mother shielded, but for how long? As soon as they reached Dragon Haven, his mother would be exposed to other dragons. She would see things that she might not be able to understand, and unless he maintained an illusion, it was possible that she would eventually see the dragons. How was he going to explain that to her?
It would be difficult. As far as she was concerned, the dragons had killed her husband. As far as she was concerned, they were responsible for everything that happened to her, and he worried about what would take place when she learned that he had sided with the dragons, and that the dragons were not nearly the terror she had believed.
Perhaps nothing would happen to her. Perhaps she would take it in stride. Or perhaps she would withdraw even more. That was what Jason really feared. She had already pulled away so much that he worried about what would happen if she withdrew even more.
Then again, maybe it was possible that she wouldn’t be able to do so. It was possible that this was as withdrawn as she ever would be. And besides, she’d already secluded herself considerably, separating herself from the rest of the village and everyone she had cared about.
When the dragon took to the air, Jason held on to the illusion through his connection to the dragon, determined to do whatever he could to help those he cared about.
8
Looking around the inside of the room, Jason smiled to himself. Everything about it struck him as authentic and, thankfully, as familiar as it could be for his mother. He had cast enough of an illusion around everything that it seemed as if it were their home.
The only thing that was difficult to fully replicate was smells. The forest dragon had been working on that with him, wanting him to be able to use every bit of an illusion that he could, but when he had tried, he still hadn’t managed it He was able to add odors somewhat, but not nearly as skillfully as the forest dragon had. Without that, the illusion was incomplete. Jason knew it was. He was doing everything he could in order to maintain that connection, that illusion, but as he worked, he wasn’t able to add anything more to it to make it seem fully realistic.
“It’s surreal,” Kayla said.
“I did it as closely as I could,” he said.
“What happens when she wakes up?”
“Hopefully, we have people here who will ensure she’s fed.”
“But she won’t know them,” Kayla said.
She sat in a chair, or what looked to be a chair. Outside of the illusion, it was something else, but within the illusion, everything was real, solid, and it was all-encompassing in such a way that he would be able to practically live it. He still marveled at the nature of the mirage, the power the forest dragon gave him. It left him wondering at times whether or not anything he saw was real. Everything was within his mind, and the more that he thought about, the more certain he was that most of what he experienced was real, but it was possible that much of what he experienced was nothing more than living within an illusion.
Had he not experienced the battle with Therin, he wouldn’t have been quite as caught up in that possibility, but seeing what the other man was able to do, the way the illusion had practically engulfed him, Jason struggled with everything that would be involved in maintaining that. He struggled with the possibility of reality.
“We can make it so that anyone she sees will look familiar to her,” he said.
“Do you think it will work?”
“I have no idea. But you’re going to be here.”
“What about you?”
“I have s
omething else I need to do,” he said.
“Which means you’re going to risk yourself.”
He sighed. The dragons of Lorach needed him to do what he could. The misfits—if there were others—needed that as well. “Unfortunately.”
“What if something happens to you?”
“You’ll be here for Mother.”
“And if your illusion fades?”
Jason looked around the room. It looked exactly like their mother’s room back in the village, and yet on the other side of the door was the palace within Dragon Haven. Outside of the palace, there was warmth and heat and humidity. Within Dragon Haven, there was plenty of food—meat and vegetables and fruits—the kind that he had never been able to enjoy within the village, and at least here, he was protected in a way that he wasn’t back there.
“If the illusion fades, you need to help protect her.”
“I don’t know if I can.”
Jason turned to his sister and took her hand, crouching in front of her. “You’re strong, Kayla. Think of everything that you’ve done for Mother. You kept her alive.”
“I don’t always feel as if I did.” Her gaze drifted to their mother and she sighed slowly, shaking her head. “I’ve tried, but with everything she’s been through, I don’t know that I could keep her safe.”
“You did what you could,” he said.
And she did more than anyone else would have done. She did more than Jason had done, and she deserved the credit for it. She deserved for others to recognize that. The only one who really mattered, though, was their mother.
“Will you be safe?”
“As safe as I can.”
“Which means that you have no idea,” Kayla said.
“Just think of it as me going off on a hunt.”
“Most of the hunts you went off on brought you back the same day.”
“Then think of it as me going off on a longer hunt,” he said, smiling.
Kayla sat in silence for a long moment, then finally she looked up at him. “I’m glad we’re here,” she said.
“I know.”
“I hope Mother is glad when she comes around.”
Jason turned away before his sister saw the look in his eyes, the concern and the question that would have revealed to her how little he believed their mother would ever come around. Each time she did, she seemed to be more alert, but then something happened and she faded again. He didn’t want to give up hope, but at the same time, he wanted to be realistic about what was really possible. Even when she did seem more lucid, she wasn’t fully there. She was still different, changed. Regardless of everything else, he didn’t know if she would return to them.
Storm Dragon: An Epic Fantasy Adventure (The Dragon Misfits Book 4) Page 9