by Janice Sims
This time Danielle stopped in her tracks and stared at him.
“I’m not some guy you met one night, I’m the guy who loves you, Danielle. And if it takes me a while to work up to a kiss, then so be it. I’m not just in this for the short term, but forever. You know how I was raised, my mom by herself. I saw how she struggled. And because of that I respect women. You’re more to me than a quickie in the backseat of a car, or a grope in the locker room.”
He opened his arms to her and Danielle walked into them. As they embraced in the hallway the other kids walked around them. “I guess it’s time to take this to the next level,” Echo said softly in her ear.
Charlie pulled the SUV to the curb at the Patterson home. After he turned off the engine he sat there, thinking. Why had he let Danielle talk him into staying with them until he found a place to live? He was not broke. He could afford to go to a hotel. Ever since he’d agreed to the arrangement he’d been second-guessing himself. Yes, he wanted to be close to Danielle. But he knew that Cherisse wasn’t going to warm to his staying with them. No, they were not the sort of divorced couple who enjoyed insulting each other and wishing each other would suffer for eternity.
Cherisse had never forgiven him for his weakness, though. She blamed him for the divorce, as well she should. It was his gambling that put stress on their relationship. Cherisse, who had wanted to go to college and get her nursing degree while they were married, had been reduced to doing secretarial work to keep food on the table for Danielle because he owed loan sharks so much of his salary he could barely keep the roof over their heads. If he had refused to pay the loan sharks, they would have injured him so badly that he would not have been able to play football, his only money-making skill. It all became a vicious cycle. No wonder Cherisse had left him.
Today, though, he was free of the loan sharks. Not exactly free of the gambling fever. He would always be afflicted, but at least he had it somewhat under control as long as he made his Gamblers Anonymous meetings and remained vigilant at all times. No temptation whatsoever. Even a little bet between friends could trigger the fever and the next thing he knew he could be in Vegas playing craps, losing and feeling like crap!
It was a daily struggle, one that he gladly went through because he dearly wanted a new life.
He got out of the SUV. It was late afternoon. He knew Danielle was home from school by now, but he had neglected to ask her if her mother would be home when he arrived. Some part of him wanted to get the meeting with Cherisse over with. Another part wanted to postpone it for as long as possible.
He could take a lot of punishment, but the look of disappointment in Cherisse’s eyes had always been able to do him in.
Just as well man-up, he thought as he walked onto the familiar porch. Looking around, he decided that not much had changed in the old neighborhood since his last visit. The yards were still well-kept, the streets busy with life—kids playing in them, somebody mowing his lawn, someone else washing her car, or the guy next door making minor repairs to his house or car. The neighbors were a multicultural lot: blacks, Hispanics, Asians and a few whites. It was a nice neighborhood.
He was glad Danielle had spent her formative years here.
He rang the bell and heard Danielle running to answer the door. He was ready for her when she opened the door and flew into his arms. Charlie hugged her tightly as a lump formed in his throat. She looked so much like her mother that it was spooky. The same long, thick, unruly black hair. The same nose, full-lipped mouth and short white teeth.
She was darker-skinned, like him, though, and she had his aggressiveness on the playing field. He’d been lucky enough to catch a few of her basketball games when she was younger and last year he’d seen her in a skiing competition.
In both sports she had displayed a single-minded kind of aggression on the playing field that had rivaled his.
“Dad!” she screamed. “You made it, finally!”
Charlie kissed her forehead and held her away from him so that he could look her in the eyes. “What do you mean ‘finally’? I arrived just when I said I would.”
Danielle wrinkled her nose and pointedly looked at the clock on the living room wall. Charlie was ten minutes later than he’d said he would be. “I hate to nitpick,” she told him, “but you’re late.”
“That’s right, you are, Charlie,” Jo said, entering the room.
She stood in the doorway with her hands on her hips, looking Charlie over. At thirty-eight, only a year older than Cherisse, he was still a fine-looking man. Dark-skinned and rakish-looking, what with that moustache of his and that shaved head. She supposed he’d gotten a receding hairline like his father, God rest his soul, and had decided to go ahead and start shaving his head. It looked good on him.
Danielle let go of her dad so he could give her grandmother a hug. Jo groaned with pleasure when he did. Peering up at him, she asked, “How was your trip? Everything go all right?”
“No problems,” said Charlie, moaning with pleasure. Miss Jo, as he called his mother-in-law—ex-mother-in-law—had always given the best hugs. And even after the divorce she had not taken sides and vilified him just for the sake of showing solidarity with her daughter. She had understood that no matter what Charlie had done, he was still Danielle’s father. And a little girl needed to be able to believe in her father.
“Miss Jo,” he said, “you’re as beautiful as ever.”
Jo didn’t even try to deny it. “Honey, we Patterson women hold together nicely.” She let go of him and turned to Danielle. “Sweetie, help your dad get his belongings out of his car and then bring him to the kitchen for a little pick-me-up, he must be tired and hungry after all that driving.”
She went back to what she had been doing in the kitchen before Charlie’s arrival.
Danielle regarded her dad. “You heard her. Put me to work.”
While taking a brief break in the employee lounge, Cherisse reread Harry’s letter that had come in Tuesday’s mail, for perhaps the fourth time that day:
I’ve just come from a run along a mountain road and while I was running I saw a bald eagle soaring above me. It’s more and more of an unusual sight. It always makes me feel a sense of wonder. I feel the same sense of awe at your beauty, your spirit, whenever I walk into a room and see you again after a short separation. I can’t wait to see you Saturday night. Harry.
“Whatcha doing?” Sonia asked as she walked into the lounge. Cherisse had been alone in the room, which was why she’d taken the letter out to read. She quickly folded it and slipped it into her smock’s pocket. Harry’s letters were for her eyes only.
She had told Sonia she had received a letter from him, though. “You caught me reading Harry’s letter again,” she confessed.
Sonia laughed shortly as she joined Cherisse at her table. “It’s about time you had a little romance in your life.”
“How’re things with you and Ken?” Cherisse asked.
“Mmm,” Sonia mused, lips pursed and eyes full of mischief. “We’re taking things slowly. It’s the only way. We’ve been to dinner a few times and when you phoned Sunday evening he was at my place helping me paint the kitchen. I’ve worked the poor boy hard. Painting, vacuuming Mary’s house, I’m wearing him down and then when he’s too weak to resist, I’ll jump his bones.”
“You find him attractive, then?”
“In a clean-cut, myopic-accountant kind of way,” Sonia joked. “You know nerds can be very sexy.”
“He’s not a nerd.”
“Sure he is,” Sonia disagreed. “But behind those glasses are beautiful brown eyes and under those high-water pants is a pretty fit body.”
Cherisse laughed shortly. “And what do you find underneath all of that?”
“A lovely soul,” Sonia proclaimed. “I’m thirty-eight. I’m not looking for Prince Charming anymore. I’m looking for a HMW: Healthy Male Working.”
“The best kind of male,” Cherisse said wholeheartedly.
Sonia laughed ag
ain and got up. “Well, I need to go give a bath to a child who doesn’t enjoy them. Pray for me.”
“Done,” said Cherisse.
Harry was going over business reports from his general manager in his suite’s office. It was something to occupy his mind while he pondered the real question: was he going to make an offer on the resort in Montana? If he did that would mean his time would have to be divided between Colorado and Montana. But to his advantage if he went ahead with the deal it would mean he would no longer have to endlessly travel the country searching for the site of his second resort. Montana. He’d only visited the state twice and if it weren’t the whitest state he’d ever been in—that honor went to Utah—it was definitely the most remote. The state was undoubtedly beautiful though, breathtakingly so.
Harry, who was in his robe after a shower following his evening workout, put down the sheet of paper he had been studying and picked up the letter from Cherisse that he’d gotten in this morning’s mail.
He sighed. He could never have guessed the emotional impact of receiving a personal message from the hand of a woman he was attracted to. Her lovely cursive writing lent an air of sophistication to her words:
Dear Harry,
While your letter wasn’t in the least suggestive, I nonetheless found my heart racing when I read it. I’m looking forward to seeing you again, too. If only to corroborate certain facts I’ve stored up in my feverish mind about you: That your arms are strong and your mouth is sweet and your breath on my neck sends shivers down my spine. I really want to see if my memory is correct on those counts, Harry. So be prepared to demonstrate for me what my memory tells me is true. Cherisse.
Harry smiled. His first letter had been chaste because he hadn’t wanted to assume she would welcome something racier. His next would be a departure from the first.
Of course, he didn’t plan to write it until after their date Saturday night. By then he would most assuredly have more ammunition for his pen and would be able to fire off a missive she would never forget.
At dinner on Charlie’s first night in the Patterson home, Danielle kept the conversation lively, interjecting notes on her day whenever it lagged. She seemed more than a little manic to her mother, who knew how badly she wanted her dad to feel at home.
Taking pity on her child, Cherisse was more than civil to Charlie. She even served him dessert at the end of the meal. Shortly after she put the piece of apple pie in front of him, Danielle announced that she was tired and would forego dessert tonight, an occurrence that happened about as often as there was a total eclipse of the sun, and said she was going to wash the dishes and go on up to bed. She said good-night, going to kiss both of them on their cheeks. Soon after her performance Cherisse watched as her mother, a woman who was a night owl to the core, said she, too, was feeling a bit sleepy and would turn in early tonight.
Left alone at the dining room table with Charlie, Cherisse felt certain she was the victim of a conspiracy. She smiled at Charlie. “They obviously want us to talk.”
“Obviously,” Charlie said and put his fork down. The pie could wait. His eyes met hers across the table. “I know you don’t want me here, Cheri, and I would have said no when Danielle suggested it but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to disappoint her…again.”
To his surprise, Cherisse’s smile didn’t waver. “I’m okay with your staying here, Charlie. I know Danielle dreamed it up so she could have you all to herself. She’s missed you a lot. Besides, it’s not as if you and I detest each other. It’s been ten years. There’re no bad feelings between the two of us. It’s all about Danielle now.”
“That’s right, it’s all about Danielle,” Charlie assured her.
“Good,” said Cherisse as she picked up her fork and daintily cut off a piece of pie with the tines. Her eyes meeting Charlie’s again, she said, “I’m glad we got that out of the way.”
Charlie picked up his fork and began to eat, but he could barely swallow because he was being deceitful and felt bad about it. The fact was, he was still very attracted to his ex-wife and if she gave him the slightest encouragement he would do everything in his power to win her back. There, he’d thought it even if he hadn’t said it.
Earlier today, while Danielle had been helping him get his suitcases out of the SUV, she had been prattling on and on about her life and her life included her mother’s life. She’d dropped an innocent enough tidbit about Cherisse dating Harry Payne and Charlie had felt his heart plummet.
Harry Payne was everything he was not—rich, successful, even richer now than he had been when he’d been a quarterback for the Broncos. Yes, they had met on the field of battle years ago and even then Harry had won. The Broncos had beaten the Eagles several times.
He bet Payne remembered that. Remembered it and was inwardly gloating now that he was dating his ex-wife. It probably gave him some sort of sick satisfaction. Cherisse was ignorant of such things. She had shown very little interest in football while they were married. According to Danielle, Cherisse hadn’t even known who Payne was when they met. But it must have been quite a coup for Harry Payne to learn that she was Charlie Washington’s ex.
Charlie saw no reason to pretend he was unaware she was dating Payne. The thing to do was to treat it as casually as possible.
“Danielle says you’re going out with Harry Payne this weekend,” he said, after which he took a bite of his pie and chewed thoughtfully.
Cherisse was at once wary of his interest. When they were married Charlie had been jealous if a man even looked her way. “Harry and I just met,” she said. “I suppose Danielle also told you he’s her sponsor. This will be our first date.”
“Wonderful,” Charlie said. “You should go out and enjoy yourself.”
“Harry said you were one of the best defensive backs in the game,” Cherisse said, trying to keep the conversation light. She gave him a sincere smile.
Charlie had been good in his day, a fact that escaped Cherisse. She had been too busy worrying about paying the bills. He wished he could make it up to her somehow.
Sitting there looking at her, how her mouth—he’d always loved her mouth—turned up in a smile that would melt any man’s heart, and how her eyes danced with joy at the thought of Harry Payne, his stomach turned sour.
Pushing his plate away, he said, “I guess I’m full, although Miss Jo really did a fine job on that pie. She was always such a great cook.”
He cleared his throat. “I think I’ll turn in. Good night, Cheri.”
Cherisse smiled at him. “Good night, Charlie.”
He took his plate with him.
Cherisse watched him go. There was something he wasn’t saying to her. She could tell when he was holding back. But you know what, she thought, I don’t care what’s on Charlie Washington’s mind anymore!
She finished her pie and drank her coffee, then got up to go upstairs for a long soak in the tub.
About an hour later, after she’d come out of the tub, had dried off and was smoothing moisturizer all over her body, there came a knock at her door. It was by then nine-thirty and she knew Danielle was probably either finishing up homework or already sound asleep. Her daughter got up early and had never fought going to bed at night, except on weekends when she wanted to party with her friends. That left her mother.
Since her mother stayed up until one or two in the morning, she sometimes came by her room for chats after they had both bathed and were ready for bed.
Cherisse walked over to the door and opened it with the expectation of seeing her mother on the other side. Instead she found Charlie, freshly showered, wearing only a T-shirt and a pair of pajama bottoms.
“Cheri,” he said, talking low and stepping into the room on bare feet, “my conscience is bothering me. I’ve got to come clean with you.”
Charlie was six-one and weighed one-ninety-five. He hadn’t been a slacker since he’d retired from the game and still made an imposing figure with tight abs, taut biceps and leg muscles. Cherisse didn’t f
eel comfortable alone with him in her bedroom when they were both in their nightclothes.
She didn’t object to his coming into the room, but she left the door open. Charlie shut it. Turning to face her, his eyes swept over her. Cherisse experienced a momentary chill when it dawned on her that Charlie was still sexually attracted to her. She supposed she would have been aware of how he felt if she had allowed herself to be alone with him for any length of time over the past ten years. But whenever he came to visit Danielle, Cherisse invariably left the room as quickly as possible, or Charlie would take Danielle elsewhere for their visits. Cherisse liked it even better when he didn’t come to town at all and Danielle went to visit him in Philadelphia. That way, she didn’t have to see him at all.
Well, she wasn’t the inexperienced little wife who had put up with years of neglect from him. Neglect in the form of lack of support and the long lengths of time he would spend away from home on gambling binges and God knows whatever else he got into with his buddies. She suspected he’d cheated on her, too, but never saw proof of it and at the end of their marriage when she told him she was leaving him and he had begged her to stay, he had sworn that in their nine years of marriage, yes, he had gambled and put them in financial straits, but at least he had never cheated on her with the groupies who followed the team from town to town.
That wasn’t enough to make her stay.
And now, this…whatever he had on his mind when he stated that he needed to come clean with her…wasn’t going to sway her about him, either.
She rounded on him before he could utter another word and cried, “Charlie, if you are in this house for any reason other than to spend time with your daughter, I want you out in the morning. And you can explain to Danielle why you have to leave!”
Charlie looked contrite. His handsome face crinkled in a frown. Running his hand over his bald head, he sighed. “I know you don’t believe me, but I have changed, Cheri. In the past three years I’ve gotten out of debt and I haven’t gambled in years. I can tell you the exact date, but I don’t think you’re interested. I would never do anything to jeopardize my relationship with Danielle. But with this change that’s come over me I’ve also been bold enough to dream of a better life, the life you and I were cheated out of because of my habit. I regret…”