Book Three_A Codependent Love Story

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Book Three_A Codependent Love Story Page 34

by Paloma Meir


  Danny’s mother, a doctor herself, stared at her as if she were missing something. She was not in the frame of mind to recognize the romantic intentions. Danny didn’t notice at all, and he wouldn’t have at any point in his life. Outside of his mother, his world only consisted of tall, skinny blondes. Poor short and round, busty Sarah Berman MD.

  I left after dinner, and told them I would be back in the morning with Vanessa and the kids. I let Danny know that I would be using his car for the extra space. He nodded in a distracted way, back to staring at the walls, finished with dinner.

  …

  My phone buzzed as I pulled into the driveway. I assumed it was one of the many women I spoke to late at night. I almost didn’t answer it. I wasn't in the mood for propping up anyone’s spirit other than my own after the long and unexpected day.

  But I did glance down as I put the car in park. I did take the call. I did somehow manage to speak, giddy with nervousness after so many years of silence. I suppose you could say this is where my real life, my meaningful life began.

  “Hello,” I said questioningly even though I knew perfectly well who was on the end of the line.

  “Serge, hello? It’s so loud here... It’s Zelda Moreau.”

  “Thanks for mentioning your last name. I don’t think I would have remembered you otherwise.” I was laughing and couldn’t stop.

  “I’m sorry? What did you say? I’m at Charles de Gaulle... My flight is running late. I don’t know what’s going on, and I don’t want to take my shoes off. The floor looks filthy.”

  “Take them off, Zelda. I don’t want to see you on the news.” Her clear voice rang through my side of the call without any interference as if she were sitting in the car beside me.

  “It’s okay now. They waved me through. The flight was booked. I was forced to buy a ticket in first class. Now I don’t feel so bad about it.”

  “Clean feet are very important.”

  “Are you making fun of me, Serge?” She laughed her sweetest laughter. “I can’t reach Danny. I’ll be there soon. Will you let him know? Is his father okay? I feel sick about this.”

  “He’s stable. I’ll tell him Zelda.” I relaxed into my seat and stared out past the line of our home into the star filled night. “When’s your flight coming in? I’ll pick you up.”

  “You’ll do that for me? Oh Serge, that’s so sweet. My flight is running behind. They changed the flight number. It’s so late where you are... I’ll text you when I find out. Go to sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow, Serge. Thank you... Why is there an acappella singing group in La Premiere lounge? I can’t hear anything...” Her voice trailed off as she spoke in quick French phrases to someone other than me, followed by the silence of the phone cutting off.

  I stayed in the car for a very long time after the phone call. I recalled the names of the stars in my head, looking out for red dwarfs and the gassy swirl at the end of our galaxy. They were almost impossible to spot with an untrained eye. Happy to know I had retained my memories of astronomy, I went into the house, rolled into my cozy bed and went to sleep.

  …

  On the dot at 10:00 I arrived at the airport to find a very worn out Vanessa and her two screaming kids. I wrangled them into the car using the engineering skills I had learned at MIT to make their infant seats fit in the back. Worn out from the experience, we drove in silence, the children pacified with bottles.

  I hadn’t considered dropping the kids off at Danny’s parents house for their housekeeper to mind them while Vanessa was at the hospital. I checked Zelda’s flight arrival at the stoplight, annoying the drivers behind me because I did not see the light turn green. Her non-stop flight had been rerouted through Chicago, I’m sure to her great annoyance. If nothing else went wrong it was scheduled to arrive at 2:30.

  I went upstairs with Vanessa to check on Danny and his family. All seemed fine. His father would be out of ICU and in a private room by mid-day. And, yes, Dr. Berman delivered that news twice in the hour I spent with the family.

  I hadn’t told Danny that Zelda was flying in to be with them. He was too tense. I didn’t want to add to his stress or make him feel like he had to go to the airport with me. That’s what I told myself at least. I snuck out as he was drifting in and out of sleep on the waiting room sofa. I felt a little bad for not telling him to clean himself up. The whole family looked a little war torn from not showering and sleeping in their clothes.

  I parked the car. She was the only one I parked the car for instead of meeting them in the driveway by the baggage claim in all the airport runs I did in those two days and ran into the terminal. There she was.

  I froze by the sliding glass doors. She regally stood tall in her long black silky skirt with lace insets pulling the fabric close around her hips, a black fitted top that didn’t quite meet the line of her shirt revealing the tiniest line of her ivory white skin. Her pure white hair swept up into a bun on the back of her head. Large black sunglasses hid most of her face. Her expression, that I could see, was expectant, aloof.

  I relaxed, content to observe my long lost friend, the sweetest Zelda. Her hidden eyes swept the room, moving right past me. I held up my hand to get her attention, but she had focused her attention on a different entryway. I made my move across the crowded baggage claim.

  “Zelda,” I stood in front of her tongue-tied. She turned towards me, and I saw she looked no different than she had as a girl. Her aging showed in how she carried herself, not in her appearance.

  “Serge?” She looked me up and down, and I was glad she was wearing glasses. I could see her mouth tighten as she took in my aged mailman shorts, grey over-washed tightly fitted t-shirt, and my sneakers with the hole in the toe. I would really over do it sometimes. I felt the ridiculousness of it all as I stood in front of her. “Is it you?” She picked up one of my dreadlocks and pulled on it lightly.

  “Yes it is. Should we...?” She put her hands on my cheeks. We stood together in the same position we had been in the last time I saw her in her room over seven years before. I looked down and felt embarrassed, remembering our good-bye.

  “Yes, we should.” She released me and leaned down to pick up her oversized carry on bag.

  “Let me get that, Zelda.” I grabbed the bag, and she turned to walk ahead of me. I reached out and pulled out the pin holding her hair up. She laughed and ran her hands through her angel hair to smooth it down.

  “Where are Louisa and Astrid?” I asked as we settled down in the car. “I thought they would be flying in with you.”

  “I’m on a quick trip.” She turned away. I guided her face back my way as I had done countless times before. “Too quick to put Louisa through the stress of travel and a change in her schedule. I’m going back tomorrow.”

  Her mouth, her pouty lips in a slight frown, her voice far away, a sadness I didn’t understand. I took off her glasses to find deep dark circles, sunken as if she spent her days crying. Danny had mentioned that she didn’t get out of bed, and that she was in a funk. He told me not to worry. He was going to set it all right.

  The whole suddenness of their situation had distracted me from the fact that her whole life had turned upside down, and as I looked into her face I did believe that her and Paolo were over. She would not be going to the life that had never sounded less than perfect for someone like her. “Do you want to stop somewhere? Get something to eat? Barney’s Greengrass? You always liked that.” I flicked her nose and turned to start my car.

  “I would love that, but I think we should get to the hospital. I don’t have a lot of time.” She put back on her glasses, “Do you still think about... Oh, I’m so tired from the flight. I have to text Astrid. I’m sorry, Serge... It’s so difficult... I’m sure there’s a better way... We use a translation website and cut and paste. I wish I had learned German when she first came to me... Louisa, I miss her so much. It’s like part of me is missing... I’m rambling... Louisa, Louisa, Louisa.”

  “Time? No I don't think about it anymore.
” I looked at her at the stoplight and wanted to say more or anything at all, but felt shy. She was engrossed in her phone, mumbling stories of Louisa and how she missed her, how she had never been away from her more than an hour before, and reading me Astrid’s replies. I smiled and let it go.

  We got into the elevator after a very silent walk through the parking structure and lobby. As the doors closed, she stood very close to me and linked her pinky finger tightly over mine. I wanted to hug her, reassure her that everything would be all right. Instead, I jokingly said, “Tight grip Zelda, is that from knitting?” She laughed and her posture relaxed though her grip remained the same.

  The elevator doors opened, and her finger untwisted from mine instantly. I saw Dr. Berman out of the corner of my eye as we walked down the long hallway to Mr. Goldberg’s room. I hoped she wouldn’t follow us, but I could hear her footsteps behind us trying to catch up. The crush that probably made her day brighter in all the misery around her was about to come to a hard end. Nothing I could do it about it.

  Zelda stopped at the doorway. I stood beside her as we watched Danny sleep in the chair next to his father’s bed. I could hear her deep breaths trying to say his name, “Danny...Danny...” Her voice finally able to say his name.

  He opened his eyes and stared at her as she stared at him. She made a move, a quick pace across the large room, her arms out. Then they were in each other’s arms, a very long hug, holding each other tightly. He pulled away and held her face in his hands and looked at her as if she weren’t real. Back to kissing her.

  My doubts dissolved. Of course, they would be together and of course it would work out. They should never have been apart, and from what I could see in front of me they would never be away from each other again. All was well.

  As I thought these happy thoughts for my good friends, I became aware of a presence beside me. I glanced over my shoulder to see Dr. Berman by my side, her mouth slightly open, and her fairy eyes wide with a subtle shock. She turned quickly and almost ran down the hallway.

  …

  They came in through the front door entwined with each other, making me wonder how they in fact opened the door. Seeing them together the way they always were, as if no time had gone by, brightened me. I put down Celena’s guitar I had brought back from parent’s house a few months before and stood to greet them.

  They seemed a little tired, more Danny than her. A big day my buddy had. We made a few jokes about the lack of style of our décor, and they were well deserved. Zelda’s expression had been priceless as she surveyed our home. We went into our respective rooms. They were loud, really loud, but I didn’t mind. I put the pillow over my head and looked forward to seeing her in the morning.

  …

  “Don’t you two ever eat at home?” She asked as I walked into the kitchen the next morning to find her opening our near empty kitchen cabinets.

  “No,” I tried unsuccessfully to repress a laughing fit.

  She looked over at me with a big smile and carried the bowls and cereal to the table.

  “You two sleep well?” I couldn’t stop laughing. I might as well have been twelve.

  “Stop it, Serge. Could you put the coffee on?” She asked.

  As I made the coffee, the bathrobe-wearing lovers sat at our glass dining table that now how had four chairs and nuzzled into each other, cooing sounds of love to each other instead of speaking. The space between the two chairs proved too large for Danny. He pulled hers a half inch closer, possibly scratching the floors we worked so hard to paint.

  I placed the cup of coffee in front of her and sat down to eat the breakfast of cereal with them. She thanked me and took a sip. The face she made was, if possible, even more petulant than the one she had shown the night before. Danny was charmed by her spoiled reaction. I was just happy to have her with us.

  “Sorry you two. Astrid has pampered me. I’ll have her make us the perfect breakfast when you come out.” She rubbed her nose against his.

  “I love you,” he kissed her nose.

  “I love you too. Do we have time before we have to go?” she kissed his nose, and it all got to be a bit too much.

  “Enough already,” I said in an exaggerated, hopefully friendly way.

  “Sorry Serge. Could you take me to the airport around 4:00pm? My flight leaves at 7:15pm. I splurged on first class. I think I only have to be there two hours early.” She pulled herself away from him, tilted her head in the cutest way as her eyes met mine.

  “What do you mean? You’re not leaving.” He stiffened, sitting up high in his chair, surprising me with his sudden change in mood.

  “Didn’t I tell you? I’m only here for one day. I have to get back to Louisa. I need to text Astrid. You distract me, my love.” She leaned into to kiss him, but he jerked away from her.

  “You’re not leaving Zelda. You’re here. Have Astrid bring the baby out.” His arm dropped from around her, and his voice grew loud, indignant. My surprise turned to shock, and it only grew worse.

  “I can’t do that. Paolo and I would have to give her notarized permission. It would be a nightmare to try to arrange from here and would take days and days. Anyway, I’m not ready to come back to Los Angeles. You’ll come out in two weeks. Your second plan, remember?” she reasoned with him, her voice unchanged from their 'I love you's', spoken not more than a minute before.

  “Then we’ll wait the days and days for the paperwork.” He banged his fingers on the table, startling her. I sat up higher in my chair unsure of whether or not to intervene.

  “Danny, Louisa’s a baby. It’s crazy that I even came out for a day. Do you know how much travel time that is? I’ve lost three days of her life. She just turned one.” Her voice trembled, but the calm tone remained.

  “You’re not leaving. You’re staying with me.” He lowered his voice, but his tone was still stern.

  “I appreciate the thoughts behind what you’re saying, but I’m leaving. You’ll be with me in two weeks. We can go back and forth. Danny, I haven’t even told my family or anyone what’s happened. Don’t do this to me.” And with that she was in tears.

  “We’re not going back and forth. You’re home. You’re staying with me.” It was as if he had forgotten the behavior that had driven her away in the first place.

  “Danny, you’re repeating yourself. Give her some space.” I tried to control my growing anger by reminding myself of everything he had been through in the past few days.

  “Stay out of it, Serge. Zelda go take a shower.”

  “You aren’t going to shower with me?”

  “No. Get ready. You always take so long.” She leaned into him and tried to kiss his cheek. He moved away from her. That was something he did. He actually moved away from her. My anger dissolved because he had clearly lost his mind.

  “Dude, what is wrong with you?” I asked as she scurried into his room.

  “What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with her? You should have heard her last night. Was that all a lie? I can’t believe that she’s doing this to me again.” Indignant and insane is what he was.

  “I don’t know what’s wrong with you, but you need to know that everything you’re thinking is wrong. She’s a mother. She has a baby. All she wants is time. You can’t give that to her? Yes I heard her. She was really loud.” I tried to reason with him, and keep my voice calm. It wasn’t easy.

  “You don’t get it.”

  “I do get it. It seems I know her better than you do. I thought you had made up this whole fantasy of her wanting to be with you. You didn’t. She loves you. You win. Isn’t that enough? Give her some time. While we’ve been out living for ourselves she built a life, a life that suddenly ended for some reason. Let her figure it out. You know she’s going to end up with you.”

  “I’m not waiting another seven years.”

  “You’ve lost it. You’re stressed out from your Dad. Don’t take it out on her. You’re both fragile right now. Don’t turn on her. Go in there and apologize. Get in
the fucking shower with her. Wash her back whatever she wants.”

  He pursed his lips, gripped the table, nodded his head, got up and followed her into his room.

  I cleared the table and sat down on the sofa satisfied my overtired and emotionally taxed friend had come to his senses. Opening my computer, I heard the door to his room open and looked up to see Zelda. She looked like a USO girl from the forties in her fitted black dress with epaulets on the shoulders and very high black wedges.

  So knocked out was I by her that it took me a moment to see the expression on her face, her mouth slack, her wide eyes red from crying. My good friend had not come to his senses. He had continued his bullying of her. “Zelda,” I said as she down beside me and stared down into her lap. “He doesn’t mean this...” I continued explaining his frame of mind and how he wasn’t thinking clearly. On and on I went, trying to comfort her for a very long time.

 

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