The kid was lying. Her attacker had her believing every threat he’d made. Five consecutive lifetimes in jail wouldn’t be enough for the monster lurking in Ashley’s memory.
Rick communicated silently to Kris, indicating that she should join them. They both wrapped Ashley in their arms. “No more questions, kiddo,” said Rick. “You’re safe and sound.”
“No more questions—ever!” replied Ashley.
“Only when you’re ready,” he murmured.
“Then that’s never.” Ashley started to bounce back after having the last word, and Rick said no more. Though his pal down in Nassau County wouldn’t be happy.
KRISTIN’S CELL PHONE RANG at nine the next morning. She left Ash in the kitchen studying for her final exams, with Quincy at her feet, and stepped onto the front porch and into another sunny day.
“Kristin, this is Mary Gleason from the human resources department.”
Her company. Her job. Kristin tensed up, but kept her tone bright. “Hi, Mary. Nice of you to call.” Not.
“Just wanted to check in and see how your daughter’s coming along.”
She let her breath out very gradually. “She’s making progress, but it’s very slow. She’s the tortoise, not the hare.”
“Well, any progress is encouraging, but I’m sorry to hear that the pace is not faster.” The woman’s voice trailed away for a moment, and Kristin braced herself for whatever was coming next.
Now Mary spoke in a crisp tone. “Kristin, I’m sorry to bring disappointing news. You’ve got to cut your leave of absence short and get back here by July 5, not the original August 1 date we’d set for you. Your family medical leave and vacation cover you until June 30 and we’ll give you the holiday weekend. But that’s it.”
“What? Why?” She quickly calculated. “That gives me only five more weeks with Ashley. It won’t be enough. She won’t even go near our house in Mayfield.”
“I’m so sorry,” Mary repeated. “But I’m sure you’ll be happy about the reason. We’ve gotten two big new accounts—you’re being assigned new projects.”
Mary lowered her voice. “This is off the record, Kristin. The higher-ups want you. Top management. They trust your work and your ability to interact with customers. Mr. Stevenson himself stopped in here to inquire how you were doing. Don’t blow this, Kristin. You’re a single parent. This is an opportunity.”
“I understand,” she said quietly. “I’ll get back to you.” Kristin disconnected the call and stared blindly at the fluffy clouds dotting the bright blue sky. What kind of a choice was that? Her career or her daughter? She scrolled down her phone contacts and punched in her real estate agent’s number.
“Have you finished the comparisons yet?” The sooner her house was actually listed, the better. “Are we ready to put it up for sale?”
“Well, that’s up to you. The real estate market’s depressed right now, and we don’t expect it to bounce back for a year or two.”
“Give me a dollar amount,” Kristin said.
She listened with growing horror.
“But that’s only a few dollars more than John and I paid eight years ago. That’s crazy. And with the fees and moving expenses, I could even lose money.” She shook her head in disbelief. “I’d be better off just staying put and waiting it out.”
She glimpsed Ashley through the screen door. Her daughter happened to raise her head just then and wave. Kristin pasted a smile on her face and waved back, all the while wondering about her next step. The one easy decision she made was not to tell Ashley anything for as long as she could put it off.
HAVING RICK JOIN THEM for dinner had become a routine, just as him dropping Quincy off in the morning was. Although the stomach flu epidemic had passed, their neighbor was now filling a time gap between a newly retired officer and his replacement, so still working for Sam.
Rick had offered to leave Quincy with Ashley overnight, but Kristin knew he and the shepherd still started each day running several miles around the lake. Quincy needed the exercise to remain healthy, and Rick said he needed to run to clear his mind. He didn’t talk any more about the incident that had sent him to Morningstar Lake in the first place, but Kris knew he kept in touch with his precinct in New York.
The evenings got longer in June, the sun’s rays illuminating the landscape well past dinnertime before shadows from the nearby mountains cooled and darkened the area. If circumstances had been different, she and Ash would have been enjoying a wonderful vacation.
Instead, Ashley was studying for sixth-grade final exams while Kristin tried to figure out job and living arrangements.
“Trade places with me for a while,” Rick suggested two nights later as they walked along Lakeside Road. Dinner was over. Ash and Quincy were visiting with Sophie and Ben and doing their own trading: a little music for a little apple pie.
Kristin had kept the phone calls from her office and real estate agent to herself until that evening, when she’d realized her thoughts were traveling in circles. She’d been trying not to burden Rick with more of her problems. After all, they weren’t his problems. And yet here he was with a possible solution.
“Trading houses is extremely generous of you,” Kristin said, “but I can’t put you out like that.”
“Why not?” he replied. “I rent a great place—the first floor of a two-family house with a big yard. My landlord won’t mind. You’d have a longer commute, but not by much. And it’s exactly what Ashley wants. Not only a new house, but a different neighborhood and a different school, too. She’s still hiding from the perp, Kristin, and my place would be perfect.”
They held hands as they often did on these strolls, their fingers lightly intertwined. Making contact had become as natural as hosting dinner, but much more exciting to Kristin.
“It’s so…so extreme, I guess. So real,” she said.
“Trading places is at least something to consider,” Rick countered. “An option. And I’m flexible.”
“Thanks,” she said. “Thanks a lot. Sometimes…I just don’t know what’s best….”
“But you keep trying. You’re an amazing woman, Kris.” He stopped walking and stroked her cheek. “I really think you are.” He took her in his arms and kissed her as though he were a thirsty man and she his oasis. Not just a brush of the lips or a little nibble, but with an urgency that demanded a response—a response she provided. He sighed with what she hoped was satisfaction.
Her own eagerness surprised her. She hadn’t experienced that excitement in so many years. He made her feel young and carefree. Wonderful. She and Rick…
A car’s horn shattered the moment and they jumped apart, like two schoolchildren up to no good. But it was more than good. It was terrific. The driver waved and made a victory sign.
“Uh-oh. We’re going to be a topic,” she said. “It’s a small town.”
“Do you care?”
“Not really. Kissing’s not a criminal offense, is it?” she teased. And it felt too good to give up so quickly.
“I’ve got a different topic for you. A new one.”
His tone caught her attention. “I’m listening.”
He held up two fingers. “I’ve got a second interview for a job handling corporate security for a retail distributor. It’s a lot of responsibility, including staffing and procedures.”
“That’s great, Rick. A second meeting. I hadn’t known you’d gone on a first.”
“Yeah. Last week.” He shrugged. “I had nothing to say about it until now, but at this point, it’s a real possibility.”
He sounded more thoughtful than excited. “Tell me more,” she urged.
“The company’s strong, but I’d have to relocate—”
“Move?” She’d known this might happen almost from the beginning when she’d helped him with his résumé. But now her spirits flagged.
“Saint Louis, Missouri. The Midwest is a logical location for distribution centers. There’s a lot to consider, but I still have another intervi
ew, and I’m sure there’s competition.”
But she was sure no other applicant would measure up to Rick. “Well, good luck. If this is what you want, then I hope you get it—even if it’s in Missouri.” She was his friend. She had to wish him well, despite the fifteen hundred miles making her feel ill.
AT 2:00 A.M., Kris ignited the burner under the kettle, went into the darkened living room and stared out the front window. Moonlight combined with streetlights to make the landscape look eerie. She was glad to be safe at home. Her worries seemed to attack more severely in the middle of the night. Her wee-hour pacing was becoming routine.
She turned toward the kitchen, and from the corner of her eye, saw two familiar figures come into view. Jogging. Running. Rick had to pass her house to reach his own. And yet she remained standing by the window, easily seen if he chose to glance her way.
He did. He motioned her to the side of her house, toward the back door.
She met him there and invited him into the kitchen.
“Seems neither of us can sleep,” he said, looking steadily at her.
“Too much on my mind.”
His gaze became soft, like a caress. “My mind is filled with you. Kissing you, holding you again.” He gestured toward the outdoors. “I had to run it off.”
Her breath hitched. He played no games. His voice, his intensity…The two of them lit a flame in each other, and she felt herself quiver deep inside.
“If you want me to leave, I—”
She twined her arms around his neck. “Here’s your answer.”
She tilted her head back, and he was there, his kisses slow, sensuous, delicious. She parted her lips and returned his advances. With her heart racing and her legs trembling, she had to lean against him. His kisses became more demanding, harder, hungry.
A hundred kisses later, and somehow, they were on the couch, their arms and legs intertwined. In his arms, she entered a wonderland that was familiar and foreign at the same time. An exploration of new visions, of new emotions. Exciting emotions.
“Easy, Krissy, easy,” he murmured a while later, holding himself very still.
She could barely hear him through the roar in her ears—the sound of her own breathing. But she felt him move away, felt the cool air touch her skin.
“What?” she asked, confused.
“Are you on the pill or something?”
She jerked to a sitting position, almost slamming him in the forehead. “Oh, my God. No. What was I thinking?” She smoothed her nightgown down.
“Thinking didn’t come into it,” Rick said wryly.
Unexpectedly, Kristin started to giggle. “We’re like a couple of teenagers—no brains and too eager.” She caressed his cheek. “And having a lot of fun.”
He covered her hand, brought it to his lips and kissed her palm. “Amen to that.”
“Fun, but no game playing.” Although their relationship would end one day soon, their respect for each other would remain strong—even in memory.
“Games are for children, Kristin. We’re not children.” He kissed her hand again, seemingly reluctant to let go. “My folks are coming up this weekend.”
The change of topic seemed strange. “Really? That’s a surprise.”
“No, it isn’t. I asked them to because the Grossmans aren’t available.”
He spoke slowly and deliberately, as if sending her a message. She waited.
“To stay with Ash in the evening while we go out on our own. We never got around to our date last time.”
She’d forgotten all about that. “If she’s willing to stay with them.”
“Of course.”
“Then it’s only fair to warn you that the two times I’ve gone out since John died have been disasters. Awful. I might not be very good at the dating scene.”
“You? Nah—the men were idiots.”
“Well, I thought so…” She clasped her hands around Rick’s neck and pulled him closer. “You do know how to plan ahead, don’t you?” she asked between kisses.
“I’m no Boy Scout….”
But he was. He just didn’t see it. “I like your ideas, Rick Cooper. It was very thoughtful of you and kind of your parents to come all this way. I just hope Ashley agrees without a problem.” Kristin’s voice trembled, and he immediately put his arms around her.
“I think she will this time.”
He sounded confident. Maybe he had insight she lacked. Maybe she was too close to Ashley to see clearly. “You’re a good man, Rick. And I hope you’re right about my daughter.”
A minute later, she stood in the open doorway watching him cross the front porch and descend the stairs. He whistled cheerfully and her heart swelled with emotion.
Dating Rick would be lovely but unnecessary. Courting her was unnecessary. If anyone had tried to predict her relationship with Rick, she would have howled with laughter and declared, “Impossible. A cop?” But somehow, Rick had turned her ideas upside down. He was a cop who cared.
But he was also a guy with nothing going for him—no security, no normalcy, no stability. A guy in crisis himself, who was still trying to figure out what he wanted to be when he grew up.
Despite all that, however, she couldn’t hide the truth from herself any longer. She was falling in love with him one day at a time—and she was sure to pay a heavy price later on.
CHAPTER TEN
“BY THE END OF THIS self-defense course, every one of you is going to be a W-I-T-C-H.”
Ashley glanced at Kristin, a puzzled look on her face. Kristin shrugged. She knew no more than her daughter did about the program. They’d filled out registration forms, paid their fees, signed papers about safety rules, and now stood in a room that could have been used for anything—a dance class, an exercise class, a karate class. Eight other students completed their group, two of whom were a mother-daughter combo just like them.
“That’s right, ladies,” continued Kelley, their instructor, who couldn’t be taller than five foot two. “A WITCH. A Woman In Total Charge of Herself.”
Ash was paying close attention, particularly when Kelley mentioned that a violent crime occurred every seventeen seconds, and one in three women would be a rape victim. Kristin, on the other hand, wanted to throw up.
“You must learn to be aware of your surroundings and listen to your instincts,” said Kelley. “If someone invades your personal space, touches you, intimidates you, or just makes you feel downright uncomfortable, you make eye contact with that person and tell him to back off. Protect yourself.”
The emphasis on safe attitudes and safety tips would be a part of each lesson, their coach told them. Then came the basics in physical training. Feet shoulder-width apart, one slightly in front of the other to maintain balance. Hands up in front to create distance. They moved from simple “keep back” gestures to a fighting stance with knees bent, one hand in a fist, while the other was ready to block blows.
Soon they learned simple blocks to deflect an attacker’s punch aimed at the face. They practiced and practiced and practiced.
“Your reactions must be automatic, because a real assault happens fast. Most victims say they didn’t have time to think.”
Two hours after the class started, sweat trickled down Kristin’s face, and her body ached.
“I wish we could stay longer,” said Ashley, wiping her forehead as they walked to the car. “I’m glad we’re coming back tomorrow.”
“If my joints can take it…” How had she gotten so out of shape?
“Mom! We have to come back.”
Kristin pulled her daughter to her. “Of course we will. And you know what? I think you were the best one in the class today.”
“Really? I wasn’t watching anyone else. Only the teacher.”
“Good choice.”
They were in lockstep as they walked to the car, arms around each other like girlfriends. “I love you, Ash.”
“I love you, too, Mom.”
She had the best child in the world, and t
hat wonderful girl was trapped in a prison not of her own making.
“I’m very proud of you. Every day, you’re getting stronger and braver.”
“No, I’m not, Mom,” her daughter whispered, latching her seat belt. “If I was brave, I’d be in school now taking my final exams instead of having Ms. Rules proctor me in the library here. If I was brave, we’d be home, and I’d be with my friends. Sabrina and I—” She cut herself off.
Stay calm. This was the first time Ashley had brought Sabrina into a conversation, and Kristin’s antennae rose. “You and Sabrina went to the movies together. Remember?” “No.”
“I dropped you both off at the mall.”
Silence stretched. Then Ashley said, “I don’t remember that.” She peered at Kristin, assessing her reaction, then gave an exaggerated sigh. “We have to face the truth, Mom. I’m not very brave. So there’s no use asking me questions.” She shrugged and quickly glanced away.
Her daughter was trying to distract her. Ashley had spoken her words as though she were acting in a play. Did she think if everyone agreed she wasn’t brave, they’d leave her alone? Kris wished, not for the first time, that she knew what was going on in Ashley’s head. She squeezed her daughter’s hands and shifted in her seat to look at her.
“How would you like to invite Sabrina up here for a few days? We could pick her up after seeing Dr. Kaplan and—”
But Ash was shaking her head.
Kristin persisted. “You could swim, play duets, catch fireflies, go fishing—”
“No!” Ash held her stomach as if it ached. “She won’t want to come, Mom. She won’t want to be my friend anymore. Maybe no one will.” Her voice ended in a whisper and Kristin gulped.
“That’s not true, Ashley. Not according to her mom. Sabrina asks about you all the time.”
So she was stretching the truth a little. Jo Anne had called a week ago to ask about Ashley, and said that Sabrina was mostly back to herself. The incident had left the girl very frightened. Ashley, her closest friend, had left her seat and never returned.
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