Human Interaction
Page 18
With her gone, the huge cat's attention turned toward me. I squeaked, managing to stand on unsteady legs. His eyes sparked with emotion. I couldn't decipher if his gaze flickered with anger, sexual lust, or something else.
A low purr came from his chest as he sauntered my direction, growing in decibels as he rested that huge head against my stomach. My hands automatically reached down to run through the soft fur.
"You're quite large, aren't you?" I whispered, enjoying the feel of his pelt. Without the blood splatters, the gorgeous fur beckoned to be touched.
What sounded almost like a laugh interrupted the purring for a brief moment.
My face burned as I realized how the sex fiend must have taken my statement. "You're a very large, very bad kitty."
He rubbed his face against me again, blatantly asking for more physical attention.
My heart melted a bit as I relaxed into the stroking. "Yeah, you know I'm right. But, I guess, just maybe… this once it's okay." I grinned down as he released a frustrated grumble. I kissed his nose, scratched behind his ears. "As much as I'm enjoying this, are you going to change back any time soon?"
He craned his thick neck to look up at me. I swear the beast smiled. A second later, Meat the man, stood before me, naked as the day he was born.
"Ack!"
"Now what were you saying about me being large?" He grinned wickedly. I retreated. He stalked me. "How many men have you been with, Shy?"
"Ummmm." I held up one finger, trying to focus anywhere else, but my eyes kept slipping south on his hunky body.
He grinned mischievously. "Then you don't know what large is, do you?"
I blinked, not certain how we got on this subject or how to get out of it.
"How many have you been with?" I chewed my lower lip and tried to slow my breathing.
"A lot."
My eyebrows shot up. "Men?" Not that I minded any sexual persuasion but I found it odd that he would just talk about the men.
He shrugged. "A lot of women."
What did that mean exactly? Is one hundred a lot? One thousand? What about those men, anyway?
"How old are you exactly?" My brows furrowed as I tried to sort out all this information.
"Two hundred, give or take a few years." His hand reached out to wrap around my waist. "Don't worry. I do pretty well for an old guy."
That's what I'm afraid of. I tried one final question in an attempt to pause the sexual happenings promised in his body language. "You aren't kinky, are you?"
He paused as his lips sought out mine. "Oh, you have no idea." He purred in promise.
"Huh?"
Too late. His mouth sealed over mine, keeping my tongue too busy to be able to toss out any more questions.
Next thing I knew, we were in his bed, and I somehow lost my clothes in the process of getting there. Meat slid over me, preventing me from pulling the sheet over my exposed body. His lips drew mine into a deep kiss, driving all thoughts of escape from my mind.
I bit my lip when his hand brushed gently over the fresh scratches, four lines across the lower half of my left ribcage. His gaze met mine as he leaned in, placing the most tender of butterfly kisses across the superficial scratches. In honesty, they were no more than what a normal house kitten would do in play. The wound stung a little, but wasn't anything really painful. He managed to haul the angry Misha off me in the nick of time.
"Hurt?" He paused to ask.
I shook my head, running my hands down his sides and around to the front of his wide chest.
He resumed his affections, moving steadily from the pink scratches to my bare stomach. I tugged on him, encouraging him to move back up. He accepted the hint, but took his own sweet time in returning to my needy lips. I nipped his neck, chin, and finally his bottom lip in reprimand. He simply released a low growl, his body moving marginally to the side, freeing his hands for further exploration.
Only when his hand cupped between my legs, did I wake from his spell. "Wait!" I pushed at his chest, ignoring his annoyed growl. "Stop!" My belly danced with nervousness and a hint of panic. Not like this when adrenaline rode us hard. I wanted more than a quick roll in the hay to release pent-up hormones.
Finally, he rolled to his back. Resting beside me, he covered his face and sucked in air. "What this time?"
I held to my resolve, going with my gut instead of my heart. "I'm not ready."
"Care to elaborate? I don't have enough blood going to my brain to muddle through a woman's thought process right now."
I sat up. "I want more than a quick roll in the hay to release the rest of our adrenaline. I want our first time to be… special." I needed to do one more thing first. Formally say good-bye to my late husband.
Meat blinked at me, his muscles relaxing by increments.
"Special how? Romantic dinner? Date? Movies in bed?"
"Movies?"
He rolled to his side, propping his head up on one hand. "Oh, I have lots of ideas for movies in bed."
The sparkle in his eyes warned me. My brow furrowed. "I'm not watching porn with you!"
"Why not? We might find a few tricks to try."
"No way." I rolled my eyes at his ever present horniness. "I meant special, special. Romance. Loving." I whispered dreamily. "An evening to remember for all time. Please?"
"For you, anything." His words held truth and sincerity.
I laughed, flinging myself into his arms. He rolled with my actions, settling me on top of his body. I wrapped my arms around his neck and planted a hot kiss on his lips. "Maybe you are my knight in shining armor after all," I whispered.
Meat didn't answer vocally. Instead, he took control of the kiss, deepening it with feeling.
CHAPTER 24
I spooned another bite of chocolate-covered ice cream into my mouth as I considered how long Meat and I had been dating. Technically, we'd met in early November and it was now mid-December. Wow. Time does fly when you're having fun.
Two days before, we'd survived a vampire attack and necked a bit at his home only to be interrupted by the wicked witch of the shifter world. After the skirmish, Meat and I had made out until my watch beeped, announcing time to get home to relieve my father from babysitting duties. With such short time constraints, we'd played around with second base until the clock called our game.
Meat sat beside me, licking his own spoon, his eyes watching my face. The corner of his lips kicked up.
"What?" I mumbled around my mouthful of yummy sundae.
"You have syrup on your face." The words rumbled from his chest, low and soft. Setting his bowl on the coffee table, he leaned in, flicking his tongue over the area. "Mmmmmmm."
I snuggled into him, feeling his body heat through our clothing. Shifters inherited high metabolisms, which lent to wound healing and mate warming. Winter proved dang cold and a girl needed someone warm to cuddle with.
He licked my face once more, before pausing to nibble on my bottom lip. I automatically opened my mouth, allowing him to deepen his explorations with his coarse, but talented, tongue. He took the forgotten bowl from my fingers, placing it beside his on the table. I took advantage of the momentary space, tucking my chilled digits under his shirt, against his sculpted six pack.
Meat simply groaned in response, not bothering to push my hands away. If anything, he pulled them in tighter with a graceful twist.
Something came over me. Insanity? Hormones? Maybe I suffered some freakish side effect from the chocolate? All I knew was that I wanted him. Right then, right there.
Frantically, I began tugging at his sweatshirt, managing to lift it to neck level before he took over the job. My hands flew across the exposed skin, learning, savoring, and testing.
He caught the same fever as his movements became just as frenzied. My clothes disappeared in a blink, as did his jeans, while his mouth aggressively plundered my own. With one powerful move, he scooped me up into his arms, mouth sealed over mine, and strode to the bedroom.
Finally after fo
ur long years, I was going to be intimate with a man.
A sudden song burst through the sound of heavy breathing.
"Ignore it." Meat ordered, his lips moving lower to caress my neck and nip my chin.
I sighed, giving his chest a small push. "I can't."
His frustration mirrored my own. A low growl vibrated from his throat as he set me on my feet. I glanced over, gaze raking his naked form. His very yummy, drool-worthy naked form.
The ring sounded again. "Dang, Cannibal," I muttered, rushing back to my discarded clothes, digging for my cell phone.
"How do you know it's him?"
I pulled the phone out of the pile, flipped it open. "'Cause of the ring tone. Didn't you recognize it?"
Meat shook his head.
I quickly explained; well aware Cannibal could hear me. "It's from the Addams Family. You know. The television theme song. Creepy. Kooky. Ooky."
I grinned wickedly while Meat tossed his head back and laughed. Cannibal seemed less than amused.
"Shyanne! I heard that!"
I snorted into the phone. "Hey. You wanted me to know it was you calling, realize it was a priority call, and answer. I was just doing as you asked." Yeah, I've had lots of practice at playing innocent.
The Enforcer cussed on the other end. "Tell that overgrown pussy to shut up before I turn him into a rug."
Meat obviously heard that remark with his sharper hearing, by his rude one-fingered wave aimed at the phone.
"Since he can't see you, I don't think that gesture has much effect," I quickly said before turning my attention back to Cannibal. "Okay. What are you wanting now, O Mighty Leader?"
"I need my razor knives picked up from the knife shop."
I blinked. Meat had stepped closer, his hands taking advantage of my nakedness to explore and tease, finding all the peaks and a valley or two along his way.
"Mmmmmm."
"Shyanne!"
I jumped at the volume and tone of the voice on the phone. "What? Sorry. I was… distracted."
Cannibal snorted loudly through the device. "Tell the horny tomcat that I'm only telling you once and you better be here in thirty minutes."
"But… I'm like twenty-five minutes from you as it is," I stammered, furiously yanking at clothing to dress as I talked.
"Hmmm. I'm hungry. On the way, pick up a pizza for me, too," he added.
"What? No. Wait! I can't get there in thirty minutes with your weapons and a pizza. That is unfair." I stomped my foot for emphasis.
Cannibal relented. "Okay. Make it thirty-five minutes. I'll make sure the pizza is ready, so you won't need more than five minutes to go two blocks out of the way to pick it up."
"But…"
"Thirty-four minutes, twenty-seven seconds and counting." Cannibal hung up.
Meat stood with a wide smile on his face. Considering the poorly timed interruption, I couldn't understand his sudden humor. "What's so funny?"
His hand waved toward me. "Not that I mind, but do you always wear your panties over your jeans?"
The wretch stood there laughing like a hyena as I tried to ignore the clock ticking in my head and become presentable at the same time. Pulling the pink bikini briefs off, I tossed them to land on Meat's head.
He reached up, tugged them off, and gave a deep sniff. "Oh, yeah. Definitely wet."
Good grief.
CHAPTER 25
I felt heavy-hearted all day long. The feeling had been gradually building over the past few days but seemed to settle in deeply as soon as I climbed out of bed. I couldn't put my finger on the exact problem, just knew I wasn't content or happy with life. Ice cream and chocolate didn't budge the melancholy. Neither did playing with the boys, reading one of my favorite author's newest releases, walking through the flower beds, or running a full 5K. Even Meat's teasing and flirtation fell flat.
Unable to shake the feeling, I hopped in the SUV and drove. I'd experienced the overwhelming sadness before, probably would again, but at least I knew what to do. With the boys in daycare, I had plenty of time for a short trip before needing to pick them up for the day.
Ten minutes later, I drove on the small white gravel drive of the cemetery. Sliding out of the car, I collected a paper sack and ambled to a tall headstone located a few steps off a mulched trail. Bright, cheerful, red, white, and blue decorative flowers stood out against the black tombstone. Kneeling, I traced the engraved letters with my fingers as I had many times before. William McDaniel. Husband, Father, Friend, and Warrior.
I settled onto the ground after adding a few more artificial flowers to the vase and closed my eyes.
"I'm so sorry, Wills. I wish for things that just can't be. For you to be here with me, to love me, and help me raise the boys. For us to have many years to come. To grow old together, to retire together, to watch our grandchildren and great grandchildren arrive and develop into their own. To be able to do everything we spoke about doing. Our hopes, our dreams. Our plans in life."
One hand reached out to pluck at a dormant blade of grass, rubbing it with my fingers as I continued to speak, my soul aching and breaking.
"I miss you. Oh, how I miss you. Not a day goes by that I don't think of you, recall a memory, wonder what life would be like if you were still with us. I dream of you often. Then I wake up and reach for you. Only to find a vacant spot on your side of the bed and a sharp pang of loss in my heart as I recall that you're gone."
I took a moment to gather my thoughts while placing the last of the decorations on the ground directly in front of the stone. Red roses, with small teardrops strategically dotting the petals, marked the site as well as glimpsed at my jagged feelings.
"And, I've told the boys all about you, just like I promised I would." A small smile appeared as I looked down at the ground. "I've told them everything I can remember. They think you are in the same league as Spider-man or some other five star superhero. And, to be honest, so do I." My fingers reached out to trace the letters once again as I sighed, my voice lowering to a whisper. "You're my hero. You always have been and always will be."
I took a long moment to look around, see the other quiet tombstones, notice the beauty of the old huge trees, standing guard over the burial sites. Witness to generations of these conversations.
"Speaking of the boys, you'd be so proud of them. They're growing fast. So smart. And such good kids. Chance is the spitting image of you. And, he's so serious for such a young age. Always trying to be the man of the family, to look out for everyone else. He's so much like you, it makes my breath catch at times."
A sparrow flew by, landing under one of the large branches, overseeing the vacant graveyard on the crisp winter day.
Silent tears welled up in my eyes, overflowing to run down my cheeks.
"Wills, I have to move forward. You see, I'm lonely. There are so many things I miss and need. I'm seeing a shifter now. Meat. He really cares for me, makes me laugh, adores the boys. I think I love him." I wiped at the tears and sniffed as they continued to roll down my face. "I want someone to come home to who will comfort me, support me, a man to help raise and guide the boys, a man to give me his love, and a man to hold me as I fall asleep at night. I learned how empty and alone I am."
I took a moment to pull a tissue from my purse and lightly blow my nose. "You'll always be in my heart. Never doubt that. You live there, with me, and with the boys. But… but, I have found that there is another part of my heart that is empty, sad, and lifeless. A part that seeks a man to fill the void. A good man. Oh, never will he replace you. There isn't such a person on this earth that could do that. No. Never to replace you. But a man to hold me, to share his life with me, to open his arms to the twins, and maybe to be the man of my future. I…"
The words slowed as I cried in earnest. Momentarily, I started once more. "I know you would want me to go on with life. To live every day as a precious gift that it is. To try to find happiness as I can. I know. And, it's time that I give it a sincere effort. The past… you ar
e my past. My beloved past that I wouldn't trade for the world. But, I have to, need to…"
The words ceased as the floodgate of tears broke free. I wrapped my arms around myself and let my head hang in deep felt sadness.
Several minutes later, I finally caught my breath, wiped my eyes, and pulled myself back together again. Leaning forward, I placed a kiss to the warm stone. "I love you, Wills." I stood and paused, looking down at the marker with its bright flowers.
A sudden light breeze picked up, gently caressing my wet cheeks as it tossed my long hair in light play. Though cold, the wind felt cleansing, pure.
My heart buoyed with the air movement. I felt peace, for the first time in a very long while. Someway, somehow I just knew Wills heard me and was telling me he supported me. That time had come for me to get out there and make a life for myself.
"Thank you."
The words were so inadequate, but they were all I had for the man that meant so much to me, the man of my heart, the father of my babies, the man who had sacrificed everything so the rest of us could live our lives in peace. A hero. My hero.
I didn't know what or how. All I knew was that I was going to be a full participant in life, no longer a spectator. Because that's what my husband would want.
CHAPTER 26
His eyes met mine. "I was attracted to her, drawn to her, had to touch her." He scanned my face for a moment before speaking. "After my sets finished, I met up with her. We… hit it off and well… we're mated." He finished with a rush.
"You found your mate last night?"
He nodded, refraining from taking my hand once more. "Her name is Dawn."
"Dawn." I mimicked, too stunned to formulate intelligent thoughts.
"Shy. I don't know what to say. I'm sorry. It's just… she's my true mate, my future. I hope we can still be friends?"
"Shy?" The sound of my name being called jarred me from my dream.
Blinking, I searched the room, finally remembering my location. Meat's home, in his bed, skin to skin as we spooned together in sleep. His hot breath tickled my ear.