“Cole. God, Cole, what are we going to do?” She began to let out a string of near incomprehensible words, trying her hardest to let out the thoughts that were in her mind but it was impossible.
“It’s okay. It’s going to be okay,” she finally heard, and she realized that the entire time she was standing there, ready to fall, Cole had been whispering into her ear and trying his best to reassure her.
“How is this ever going to be okay? They’re not going to stop, are they? Not until they get what they want. Not until I’m dead… and Taylor… Oh, God, Taylor.” Though she wanted nothing more at this moment than that contact with Cole, she wrested herself from his arms and ran to her daughter, kneeling and pulling the little girl into her arms.
Taylor, oblivious to what was going on, began to pat her mother’s hair.
“It’s okay, Mommy,” she said, in a perfect imitation of Cole’s comforting. Then, there he was again, arms moving down and around both of them, as if he were determined to do his best to protect them from anything that might possibly harm them in this moment.
They stayed like that for a little while, but Kassie knew that they didn’t have much time to stick around like this, not in this apartment where those men had been able to get in—to invade her sanctuary. As loathe as she was to admit it, her home was no longer safe.
“What are we going to do, Cole?” she said when she finally felt her head beginning to grow a little clearer. “What can we possibly do now?”
“We need to get you someplace safe,” he said. “Not here. You can’t stay here.”
“I know,” she said, squeezing her eyes shut. It was a horrible feeling. The fact that she was going to have to uproot her daughter and take her… somewhere… It was appalling. Who knew what Taylor was going to have to go through, all for the sake of keeping her safe from these men? And who knew how long this was going to go on?
“Will it be like this forever?” she said. “Cole…”
“No. I won’t let it,” he said immediately. “I’ll find a way to put a stop to this, Kassie.” There was something in his voice that let her know at once that he wasn’t messing around. He was completely and utterly serious about stopping those men and keeping Taylor—and her—safe. But what about his own safety?
Looking into his eyes, she knew that making sure he came out of this okay wasn’t Cole’s priority. And that worried her more than anything else. However, she still didn’t quite have the words to express to him how much he already meant to her, to her family. With a deep sigh, she shook her head.
“We need to get out of here. As soon as possible. I’m going to go get a few things packed, and then we can figure out…”
“Yeah,” said Cole, reaching out again to run his hand reassuringly down her arm. The touch sent a strange sensation through her though. More than being reassured, she felt electrified by it. Her heart started to beat a little bit faster, and it wasn’t fear this time. It was something else completely, and she was still a little hesitant to put a name to that emotion.
“I’m… I’ll be right back,” she said, quickly excusing herself before she became any more flustered. Going to the back bedroom, she found the suitcases she used the last time she went on vacation—it was years ago now—and began to slowly fill them with her things and Taylor’s, doing so as quickly as possible, the concept that those men might be outside and watching terrifying her to the core.
Just a few weeks ago, life had been so simple. It was incredible to think that things had become so complicated, so quickly. And yet, despite the danger she was in, she already knew that she wouldn’t give up Cole’s return to her and Taylor’s life for anything. His presence gave her comfort and strength. Knowing that he was out there with her little girl helped her to be confident that no matter what, those men wouldn’t be able to hurt them. They would prevail regardless of what happened.
She just wanted to know how long they were going to have to put up with this so they could move on and begin to build their family. There were so many things she wanted to tell Cole already. Her heart was brimming with emotion, and now just didn’t seem to be the right time to hit him with the things that weighed on her mind.
With a sigh, Kassie finished with her packing and returned with her things to the living room, finding Cole on the sofa with Taylor. In his eyes, she could see that he was just as worried as she was, but he was doing his best to keep Taylor calm. Neither of them wanted her to see the fear that pervaded their senses.
When he saw that she was back in the room, he moved away from Taylor and stood. “All right. I’m going to step outside for just a minute and see… see what I can see.” His voice was grim, but there was an undertone of something in it, something almost savage. Was this the warrior in him coming out? The Marine that had been lost in the trauma of coming home after all that had happened to him?
Kassie nodded and picked up Taylor as he went to the door. She only had to wait a little while before he returned.
“We seem to be in the clear for now, which means we should get a move on immediately.”
“Right. Okay, then. Let’s just go.” With a nod toward him, she made her way toward the door. When she tried to pick up her luggage, Cole immediately took it out of her hands, not even entertaining the idea of letting her do it herself.
“You just take care of Taylor,” he said as he pushed the door open for her. And then they were off, down the stairs and outside again. She didn’t know where they were going to go yet, or what they were going to do now that her apartment was no longer a safe space for them. But for just now, that didn’t matter. What did matter was making sure that there was no way for those men to get to Taylor. She didn’t even care about her own safety. She would do anything to ensure that her daughter remained safe, just as she had done from the very moment that Taylor was born.
“There are some good motels about an hour from here where we should be safe,” he said. “At least for now. They’re in the opposite direction of the place where I was staying, so it should take a while for them to track us down if we head that way.”
“Right. If you think that’s what we should do,” she said. Never had she felt more hopeless in her life. She was perfectly aware that Cole was the one who knew everything in this case about dealing with these men—about fighting real battles. But she didn’t hate the fact that she had to rely on him. In her heart was the undeniable feeling that she could trust this man, even if their acquaintance—in the past as well as the present—had been short.
They got downstairs and threw their things into Kassie’s car and put Taylor in the backseat. She was being uncharacteristically quiet, as if even she knew that she was in danger and needed to play along right now with everything.
“It’ll be okay darling,” Kassie whispered, kissing her soundly on the head before closing the door and getting into the front seat, Cole clamoring into the passenger side next to her. Then she looked over. “Right, then. Just tell me where to go,” she said.
And then they began to drive. They didn’t say much during their trek, both seeming to prefer the silence in this moment, neither really seeming to know what to say with the weight of everything that hung over them.
The day had already been late when they set out, and the sun was setting when they finally arrived at the outskirts of the city and the motels that Cole had indicated. They were older but nice places, and she could see in an instant that he had chosen a place near the woods, perhaps not surprising considering what he was.
“Just wait in the car a moment,” he said once she’d parked. “I’ll go get our room.”
He started to step out, but before he did Kassie came to her senses and quickly grabbed for her purse.
“Oh. Here,” she said, grabbing for her wallet and pulling out her card.
“Right,” said Cole, looking a little flustered as she handed it to him. But the moment quickly passed, and then he was off to the motel office to secure them a room. While he was gone, Kassie sat there in the car and con
tinued to think about everything that had happened that day and the fact that she was now running away, something that she had never imagined she was going to have to do.
The horrible feeling of being prey to these men’s whims and now being forced on the run continued to crop up in her stomach, and Kassie continued to have to force it back down in order to deal with the demands of the moment. She knew that the most important thing was simply to make sure that Taylor was okay, that she not see how terrible the events that were unfolding around them were, and that she wouldn’t be traumatized by these things. She simply would not and could not let that happen to her daughter.
With any luck, this would be nothing more than a simple, passing moment in her daughter’s life. But she still didn’t know how quickly this would be over and dealt with, and that was assuming it would be over and dealt with. She didn’t even want to think about the fact that she might be forced on the run forever—forced to flee from the place that she had known as her home and never return.
And what if she did flee and those men pursued her? Would they really chase her to the ends of the earth for this prejudice? Was that possible? She didn’t know, but for now it was enough to know that Cole was on her side regardless of what came next.
As he came around with the motel key and began to pull their things out of the back, Kassie got out and retrieved Taylor from the backseat. The little girl began to rub her bleary eyes, and Kassie noticed for the first time that she seemed to have fallen asleep at some point while they were in the car on the way over.
“Shh, it’s okay little girl,” she whispered as she rested her on her hip. Cole glanced over and gave the two of them a small smile as he closed the trunk and then motioned toward the far end of the motel.
“Room 117,” he said, as quietly as possible so as not to disturb Taylor, then the two of them were off. He opened up the door to a worn down but not overly trashy room with two large beds inside. Kassie lay Taylor down, and immediately the little girl curled up on a pillow and put her head down, ready it seemed to fall into a deep slumber.
“She’s tired. And so am I, as a matter of fact.” said Kassie, rubbing her hand over her face.
Cole chuckled somberly. “Yeah.” He ran his fingers through his hair as he dumped the luggage down on the far side of the room. “I hope you don’t mind that I got just one room for all of us. I just thought…”
“No. I honestly wouldn’t feel comfortable alone tonight,” said Kassie before he could even finish the thought. Having Cole in the same room with her was just about the only thing that was going to let her sleep tonight, she mused. So long as he was there, she was going to be at least a little less worried about someone or something barging right in through the front door and harming her or her little girl. Her dreams might not be sweet, but at least she could count on him being there if something were to happen.
“All right,” he said. “But you know, if you need a moment or anything—”
“Cole, don’t worry. I feel good with you here. Comfortable. It’s a relief knowing that you’re beside me. I’m being honest about that,” said Kassie, turning and smiling at him. And to that a look of surprise came over his face, as if he honestly hadn’t expected those words from her, or that sort of sentiment.
“Ah.” Cole stiffened slightly, blue eyes fixed on her. “That’s…”
“That’s what?” she said.
“Nothing.” He shook his head. “Just a little strange.”
“How so?” said Kassie as she moved past him and opened up a suitcase, searching through it for the pajamas that she had packed for Taylor.
“It’s just that nobody has ever said anything like that to me before. I’ve always been a charity case at best, usually a nuisance, and, at worst, something to be feared. So, forgive me if I’m a little taken aback to hear that you’re thankful to have me around.”
Kassie furrowed her brow as she found what she was looking for and straightened, looking back up at Cole. Did he really feel that way? She knew that he had been treated badly in the past, that he’d had a difficult life, but to hear that he had never felt truly welcome…
“Cole, don’t ever look down on yourself when you’re around me,” she found herself saying without even realizing that the words had come up inside her. “I really mean that.” She made her way back over to Taylor to assist her in dressing for the night. “Without you, I wouldn’t have this little treasure here. But that’s not the only reason I say that. You’re special. It hasn’t taken me long to realize that. And I’m not just talking about your powers—what you are. You’re a great man with a wonderful heart. Just look at everything you’re doing for Taylor and me.”
Cole dropped his head down, averting his eyes. Was that embarrassment or something else completely?
“Taylor is my daughter. It would be shameful if I didn’t do this for her.”
“Sure, it would be. But that’s not the reason you’re doing this. I could tell you loved my little girl from the moment you first set eyes on her, the same way I did. There’s a lot of love inside of you, Cole, and there aren’t that many people in the world that I could say that about. It’s a strange thing that we’ve known each other for such a short amount of time, and yet I feel like I know you better than anybody I’ve ever known.”
Kassie broke off, having forgotten herself and been almost on the verge of revealing too much about her feelings in that instant. Or would it have been too much? Her heart fluttered in her chest as she thought about what it was she wanted to say to Cole just then, and a truth that she had only just barely begun to acknowledge herself rose up loud and clear inside her mind.
She loved him. The feelings that she had been entertaining toward him were more than kinship or friendship. They were feelings of absolute and complete love. Tendrils of it were wrapping itself around her heart and squeezing it so tightly in their grip that it was almost painful, and yet it was a beautiful sort of pain. It reminded her of that moment when she first saw Taylor in the hospital.
She had learned in those first seconds of motherhood that love was simultaneously the most beautiful and the most terrifying thing one could ever experience. Now, as she sat there and was struck by the realization that she was in love with Cole, truly and fully, Kassie once again felt lightheaded to the point that she almost thought she was going to faint. It was a miracle she didn’t as she finished what she was doing with Taylor and tucked the little girl under the covers.
Cole had been silent since her last little speech, though he had been watching her the entire time since then. Now, as Kassie sat back up, she turned toward him and met his piercing blue gaze, feeling her stomach turn somersaults. They stared at one another for a long moment, then Kassie felt a warm flush coming over her cheeks.
“E-excuse me. I think I’m going to go outside for just a second and get some fresh air,” she said, quickly standing up from the edge of the bed and making her way to the door—anything to escape that gaze and hopefully be rid of the aching sensation that was coursing its way through her body.
Yanking open the door, she edged her way out into the cool evening air. The sun had mostly set, leaving the sky awash in the faintest of sunset colors, dark purples and deep oranges and pinks above the treetops.
Kassie stared up at it for a long moment before she leaned back against the wall and squeezed her eyes shut, amazed that she was able to let herself be caught up in her feelings the way that she was with everything else that was going on. Surely, now wasn’t the time to go about falling in love? It seemed like such a silly thing to do… and yet, it also seemed to make perfect sense.
The three of them were in this together, and in that regard, it was only natural that these feelings would come blossoming forth. After all, if Kassie and Cole couldn’t rely on each other, who else was there? She just wondered…
How did he feel about her? She knew that he loved their daughter, but…
“Kassie?”
Startled, she turned around a
s Cole stepped out of the room and came to stand beside her. Biting her lip, she turned her face away as if fearful the thoughts that were racing through her head would somehow be written in her expression.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“I’m fine. Just needed a bit of air,” she said.
Beside her, he nodded. They stood there for a little while, both in silent contemplation, as the color faded from the sky and it became a dark, cool black. She didn’t know how long they had been standing there when she felt a hand reach out and close over her own, squeezing gently.
“It’ll be all right,” said Cole. “I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but I’ll make sure of it somehow. Whatever I should do, I’ll be sure that you and Taylor come out of this okay.”
“Me and Taylor…” Kassie squeezed Cole’s hand back. “That’s not good enough, Cole.”
He glanced over at her. “What do you mean?”
“I mean exactly what I said. That’s not good enough. You have to promise me right now that you’ll be okay too. Because… because you’re important to us. I won’t let Taylor lose you now that you’re in her life. I won’t lose you now that you’re in my life. Okay?”
The silence enveloped them again for another long few minutes. Then, quietly, Cole replied with a whispered, “Okay.”
Chapter 14
The days passed, and despite herself, Kassie’s thoughts grew grim. Spending day after day in the tiny motel room with nothing to do but think about the position she was in did nothing to ease the tension in her heart, and the only thing that was keeping her stable in those moments was the fact that Cole was there with her.
He was a guiding force, a light in the darkness. Cole seemed to be able to sense her growing worry and was doing everything in his power to assuage it as best as he could despite the circumstances that they were in, with brief squeezes of the hand whenever they had a spare moment or a word of encouragement when it was most needed.
And there was Taylor too, of course. Her daughter was more than happy to have time with Kassie after the many years that she’d been forced to be apart from her as a single mom working a day job. With nothing else to do, they caught up on all of Taylor’s favorite cartoon shows airing on television, or, at her daughter’s encouragement, Kassie would spend lengthy periods of time trying out the newest hairstyles for that perfect princess look.
My Secret To Bear Page 10