by April Dawn
A double knock came at the door. The agreed upon signal that told her it was Joshua. Reena dropped her book, rose from the chair, and crossed to the door. She opened the door, and Joshua entered, his face a healthy bronze from hours spent in the sun.
“How was the sunset this evening?” The question had become a habit of late.
“All fire. Golden fire like your hair in the sunlight.”
She lowered her lashes, eyeing him from beneath their cover.
“Well,” he said, surveying her bed gown, “it’s late, and I should let you rest.”
Reena climbed into bed and turned away. The rustling of his clothes and the splashing of water in the basin enticed her to give in to an urge that had existed from their first night aboard ship. She eased back over and peeked. Joshua’s back was to her, and she watched as he lifted his shirt over his head. The muscles in his back flexed and jumped as he tossed the shirt aside. His broad shoulders seemed so strong, and Reena itched to run her hands over them. Grasping a washcloth, he cleaned his chest and neck. Water ran in rivulets over his muscular back. The cloth splashed back into the basin, and she followed the line of his spine down his muscular back. He slid his breeches down, and Reena marveled at the firm roundness of his nude buttocks. His body gave the impression of being so hard and yet so soft at the same time. His legs were covered in a sparse mat of hair, and the muscles looked so powerful that he might be able to run hours before tiring.
He turned and reached for his nightshirt, giving her the first glimpse of his manhood. Reena held back a gasp. All thought fled from her as it rose and thickened. Her breathing turned ragged, and her body feverish. This part of him truly was powerful. She hadn’t even realized that he’d turned to face her completely until he dropped his nightshirt absently to the ground.
Reena glanced up, meeting his eyes. He held her in a trance, he as breathless and feverish as she. A thunderstorm of electricity flew between them. Her gaze moved slowly down his neck to his chest. Her eyes, her mind, and her body, all sang the praises of his form. He was magnificent. A long scar ran across his abdomen, but it did not detract from his magnetism. He moved toward her like an animal stalking its prey, but the words to stop him were forgotten and unwanted.
He drew the cover from the bed, his gaze roaming her thinly clad body as hers had done only moments before. His eyes were a storm of intensity. He moved onto the bed next to her. The sensation of his body so near to hers, the heat of him unhindered by layers of clothing, was an aphrodisiac. She trembled as he knelt on the bed, and then his mouth was on hers.
His kiss was raw, animal, passionate, and Reena wanted it to go on forever. Her body burned for his touch, her mouth rejoiced in the pleasure. No coherent thought existed, only heat, passion, and animal need.
His hands grasped her arms, and he tugged her to him, pressing the heat of him against her. In the eye of the storm an ache built deep within her, a mysterious need in its core. She moaned, and curved her arms around his neck, exploring the muscles there. Her thin gown felt like nothing. All she knew was his skin next to hers, his mouth on hers. Reena was awash in passion. Joshua moved from her mouth, tracing the lightning sensations with his kisses down her neck. He lifted her gown. Every spot his hands caressed sent electric waves of pleasure shooting through her. When he pulled the gown from her head, Reena could sense there was something she was supposed to do or say, but the storm raged within her, stealing her thoughts. She was saturated with need for him. Drowning in it.
Joshua held himself immobile, staring down at her body. He studied her from breasts to waist, and then on to the small patch of hair at the crux of her thighs. “Amazing.”
The strength of his desire wrapped in that one word sent a shock wave through Reena, making her heart pound. His palm slid over her breast. She moaned as his fingers brushed her nipples.
Her body pulsed with desire, and she writhed beneath him. He brought his mouth to her breast, kissing and caressing one swollen peak and then the other. Her body was so sensitive to his touch that Reena thought she might die. So when he ran the stubble of his day old beard over her nipple, she cried out, arched her back, and held his head to her breast.
Her body flooded with sensation and her hands roamed down to the hardness of his muscular back. His hands and mouth moved over her. His fingertips explored her stomach, and the flesh rippled in excitement and expectation. When his hand moved between her thighs to explore her womanhood, she cried out in ecstasy. His fingers slid in and out, up and down, pressing and rubbing, driving her wild. The storm building inside her threatened to break and just as she was about to give in, his fingers were gone.
A whimper came from deep inside her.
“Yes, love, I know.” He parted her legs wide, and moved between them, placing himself at her entrance.
She held her breath as he thrust forward, tearing through the barrier of her virginity, and burying his shaft deep inside her. The small flash of pain did nothing to dull the storm that raged inside. His hard manhood filled her, stretching her to the limits. Reena moaned, wiggling her hips at the strange sensation. Her movements sent another jolt of pleasure through her, and she lifted herself to him.
“No.” Joshua lifted his body taut above hers. “No, I…”
She followed his eyes and saw the blood that his entry had wrung from her. Yes, he’d taken her virginity. The deed was done, and she didn’t care. The storm inside her wouldn’t still, she knew, until he continued.
“It’s all right love,” she said tenderly, her hands on his cheeks. “I want this too. Come to me.”
She shifted her hips at the peculiar sensation of fullness. With a groan, Joshua began to move inside her. His hands slipped under her shoulder blades, and he hugged her to him. His body fit hers so perfectly. The unbearable shocks of pleasure made her quiver, and the pressure of him inside her seemed so right. Why had they ever been apart? They seemed to have been made to fit each other. Reena bit his shoulder to stifle her cries and held him as close as he held her. They came together faster and faster until the storm came to a crashing climax, washing them into the ecstasy at its core.
Reena lay held in Joshua’s embrace, his body still one with hers. Her mind had yet to process what had happened, but as the ardor cooled, Joshua’s mind apparently had. He jumped from the bed, his nude body gleaming with sweat. Running a hand through his hair, he stole a glance toward the bed. Reena yanked the covers up, hiding her nakedness. He pressed his lips together, his dimples making a brief appearance.
Oh God. Reena’s mind whirled. Did he regret what had happened?
Joshua grabbed his breeches from the floor and lifted one leg to shove into them, not looking at her. Reena’s heart welled in her throat, and her eyes stung with unshed tears. Not for the act that they had shared. She would cherish that forever, though his obvious guilt would make this memory as bitter sweet as that of their first kiss.
“I’m sorry, Joshua,” she whispered.
His breeches dropped to the floor. He hung his head, and then braced his hands on the table, his face studying its surface.
Tears surfaced in Reena’s eyes, partly because she had considered marrying another, but mostly, because she’d hurt the man that she loved by giving him the thing that she treasured most.
“It was my fault. We can forget it happened if you like. Pretend everything is the same,” she added.
His head swung in her direction, eyes wide. “Forget? How could we forget? I took your virginity, Reena. I’ve ruined you.” He moved to the bed, sat next to her, and took her hand. “I thought you weren’t a virgin any longer. You told me that you and Michael—then Martin said—well I thought that you...”
Reena gazed into those bright blue eyes. “You thought that Michael had...” She shook her head and laughed softly. “A few kisses were all that ever existed between us. All that ever could have.” Pulling the sheet hard against her bosom, she squared her shoulders. “As for forgetting”—a lump formed in her throat�
�”if you want to pretend that nothing has happened, I can manage it. If it would make you happy?”
His eyebrows furrowed, and he cupped her face in his hands.
“And why would I want to forget? I find you to be very desirable, and I enjoyed showing you the ways of love. Did you not enjoy it too? Do you wish to forget?”
She studied the blanket, picking imaginary lint off the covers to hide the wetness of her eyes.
“It was the most amazing experience of my life,” she whispered. “And I certainly don’t wish to forget, but I know that you didn’t mean for this to happen.” She gazed up at him, letting the tears in her eyes show the pain that she had always tried to hide. “Joshua, I’m not beautiful or fashionable. I know I’m not Juliet.”
He eyed her, eyebrows raised.
“I’m too tall. I tower over most men.”
“You’re a head shorter than I,” he replied.
“I’m not a proper, pale flower like most girls. While they embroider and study music, I read and study sunsets.”
“I shouldn’t have you any other way. Those other women are dull.”
“My bosom is embarrassingly large, as is my whole frame.” She looked at the offending body parts.
He placed a finger on her chin, guiding her face toward him.
“Reena, Your body is the right size to fit mine. You are the perfect height and have enough size that I don’t have to fear crushing you the way I might with another.”
He pulled the blanket from her grasping hand, and it pooled at her waist.
“As for your breasts.” He gazed at them. “I find them delightful.” He closed a hand over her breast, and her nipple hardened immediately. She gasped at the miraculous power that he had over her flesh. He winked, and a dimple showed in his mischievous smile. “And very responsive.”
His hands slid over her, and Reena arched into his touch, the need in her body responding to his call. She reached up and traced the square jaw line that she had so longed to touch.
“The truth is Reena, I’ve wanted you since I first laid eyes on you.” He moved his body over hers.
Reena lifted her eyebrows in disbelief, and he laughed in response.
“That’s right. When I came to your eighteenth birthday party.” His butterfly kiss on her collarbone accentuated his words. “You looked so lovely, yet still so young.” Another delicate kiss on her neck. “You came out to talk to me, and I knew that I wanted you. I wanted you so that I didn’t even think of what would happen if someone had come upon us.” He nipped gently at her neck, running his hands over her waist and hips. “That would have been quite the scandal for the society pages, don’t you think?” He wiggled his eyebrows. “Joshua Sinclair found in a torrid embrace with Maureen Harrison at a party last evening. When asked why, he simply said: ‘There was something irresistible about her.’ That would have been interesting indeed.”
She laughed, amused at the picture he painted, but her laugh turned into a moan as his hand explored the soft hair at the crux of her thighs.
“That was a wonderful and terrible night for me.” His hands held, and his words ceased. His eyes seemed to focus on something in the past. “I was so lost. You anchored me, Reena.” He stared into her eyes, the weight of his gaze told her how much that moment had meant to him. “When I touched you, I lost control for a moment. I’m glad I found it again when I did, or we might have had this conversation that night.”
He laughed, and she couldn’t help but grin.
“That was why you stopped so suddenly?”
“Why did you think?”
“I see now that what I thought doesn’t matter,” she said. “I’ve been wrong about so many things. I guess I can’t lend much weight to my own thoughts and memories anymore. At least not my interpretation of them.”
“Well, that is why I stayed away from you, especially when we came aboard ship. I couldn’t be sure that I wouldn’t try to seduce you. You really are a wicked little temptress.” He kissed the hollow of her throat.
She put her hand on his shoulder, enjoying the firmness of his muscular flesh beneath her fingers. Reena moved her fingertips over his back, exploring the flesh there. He closed his eyes, throwing his head back at the pleasure of her touch as he covered her body with his own.
“Since I went into business with your uncle, he has been insisting on those meetings each month, which are more talk than business most times. I found it all but impossible not to see you.” He lay atop her, resting on his elbows, hands absently covering her breasts. “If I didn’t see you on the porch, I would seek you out. I needed to have you near me, but that nearness was hard too. I wanted you so badly, but I couldn’t touch you.”
He drew his lips over her nipple, the light touch made her body flood with warmth, and she released him, nails digging into the mattress.
“The only time I was actually happy was when I found an excuse to be with you. If you had put me off, I don’t know what I should have done.”
He settled himself between her legs and placed his hardened manhood at the entrance to her body.
“Do you still think we should forget? Pretend this never happened?”
“Never.” Her whisper was barely audible, even to her.
She threw her head back as he plunged himself inside her in one swift motion. He drove fast and deep, filling her with ceaseless sensation and driving her to the brink and over. She moaned her release. Joshua continued on with reckless abandon, taking her back to the edge. Reena dug her nails into his biceps. He stiffened, and her name filled their small room on a shout. Reena cried out, his completion triggering another of her own.
When the sweat and heat between them had cooled, Joshua pulled her into his arms and soon fell asleep. Reena lay awake, watching the even movements of his chest. She had done it, for better or worse, she had been with the man she had always loved. Glancing down at her body, she ran the tips of her fingers over her stomach.
A woman now.
She had given him her most prized and highly fought for possession, and she did not regret it. Biting her lip, she glanced at Joshua once more. What would happen now? She was a woman, yet not his wife. What would he expect from her? What would she expect from herself?
She rolled over, searching for the peaceful sleep that stayed just out of reach.
Chapter Twenty
Joshua eyed Reena across the chessboard. The elaborate board and its hand carved pieces were of no real interest to him. Joshua hardly ever beat Reena at chess, but he didn’t care. The distracting way that she bit her lower lip as she contemplated her next move, the attractive pout that she wore when she couldn’t find a way to save a needed piece, all these things were more than he could take at times and stole his concentration. He had never been able to focus on the game when she was there, but now that he had tasted her sweetness, it was even worse.
His mind moved from one thought to the next, flying through the last days with abandon. One minute he was imagining her lovely soft body responding to his in a way that no other woman had. In the following minute, he was berating himself for believing that bastard Martin and not knowing her to be innocent. Then he would reprimand himself for taking her virginity, especially when he thought of the way he had done it. It had been his first time with her. He should have been much gentler, even if she weren’t a virgin. He had thrust into her so fast and deep that he hadn’t even felt her virginity until he’d ripped it asunder.
“Your move.”
His mind drew back to the present, and he blinked at the chessboard, trying to make sense of the pieces, which for a moment seemed foreign to him. Moving his knight to guard his king, he looked back at Reena. She pushed a lock of hair behind her ear, and her eyes scanned the board from piece to piece. Joshua’s gaze slid to the spot where the blood pulsed in her throat, longing to press his lips there. He fisted his hands as he contemplated the softness of her flesh beneath his. His mouth tasted the fresh sweetness of hers. His body ached to be inside her.<
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Mind flying again to the feeling of her barrier being broken, he closed his eyes. He had to stop thinking about it. What had been done was done, and he was glad for it. He cared for her more than he cared for anyone, and he wanted her more than any woman he had known, and now she was his. She would be his forever. He would make sure of it.
Joshua took her hand, and she dropped the piece that she’d been holding. His eyes met hers, the heat in his body immediately speaking to hers. He stood, walking around the table to stand before her. Holding out his other hand, he stared down at her wide gaze.
“But we haven’t finished our game.” She smirked as she reached out and took his hand. He hauled her gently to her feet and led her to their bed.
Now that he had her, he knew that he would never let her go.
9
They lay together on the bed the next morning, reading a copy of John Donne poetry, some of which made Reena giggle. Hearing the softly spoken and sensual poetry coming from Joshua’s mouth was amazing, though, and Reena found herself cuddling closer to him. He held her, kissing her hair while he read a poem where a man tried to convince the woman he loved to share herself with him in a less than innocent way. She giggled again, trying to contain her responses but unable to. The thought of the man trying desperately to convince the woman that loving him was no different than being bitten by a flea struck her as very silly. Besides, if she really loved and wanted him, there would be no need for words as there never had been between Joshua and her.
“It’s almost time for me to leave and join the crew on deck.” He closed the book.
She’d been trying to ignore that fact. Reena hated the time in the day when he left her to do his duty by the captain, and she wished that he could stay with her all day like this. Only the two of them, alone in their bed. She also worried that she might be with child. They made love often. She couldn’t seem to control her body when he was near. The bliss of their lovemaking stole her mind. All she could think of was how much she loved him and how good it was to touch and be touched by him.