'Do you want me to state the obvious?'
'But certainly. You so rarely do.'
Feeling she was in the way, Carolyn moved back a step, delighted to see Derek coming towards her. 'Well, well,' he boomed, 'if it isn't the fairy on the Christmas tree!' He caught her hands in a close grasp. 'You look divine. Now I'll have to repaint your hair.'
'Re-paint your hair?' Romaine said. 'Are you a painter?'
'Indeed I am.' Derek looked at Carolyn and quickly she made the introductions, aware of an unexpected tenseness about Alvin.
'I've been looking forward to meeting you,' Alvin said. 'I've heard a great deal about you.'
'Indeed? As a man or a painter?'
'As a painter. I saw a couple of your portraits in a gallery in Bond Street. I liked them.'
'Ahl' There was undeniable satisfaction in Derek's voice. 'Coming from you that's a real compliment. You have an excellent reputation in the art world.'
'Thank you. I'm at least fortunate in being able to back my fancies.'
'I would have thought you only chose well-known artists,' Carolyn said.
If he recognised the sarcasm, Alvin chose to ignore it. 'Once I decide to buy an artist he usually becomes famous.' He looked at Derek again. 'What made you decide to live here?'
'My sister needed the country air.'
Alvin nodded. 'Of course. Your sister—I'd like to meet her.'
A curious shuttered look came over Derek's face. 'Margaret doesn't go out much. She needs a great deal of rest.'
'Don't you find it boring living here the whole time?' Romaine Anderson asked.
'I'm never bored as long as I have my work.'
'I'd adore to have my portrait painted. Are you frightfully expensive?'
'Expense is relative,' Derek replied. 'When I need the work my fee is lower.'
'Do you need the work now?'
Derek chuckled. 'An artist never turns down a commission. If you'd like to offer yourself as a model, I'd be delighted to paint your portrait without any charge.'
'That's not a very businesslike thing to say,' Carolyn interrupted. 'No artist should give his services free.'
'I quite agree,' Alvin said, and smiled at the woman beside him. 'You must allow me to pay for the portrait, my dear.'
'How wonderful of you.' Romaine squeezed his arm. 'Now you make me feel guilty.'
'A beautiful woman need never feel guilty in accepting a present. Beauty deserves everything it can get.'
There was a deliberated fatuousness in Alvin's voice that made Carolyn certain he was speaking for effect rather then from feeling, and she knew instinctively that he was doing so in order to annoy her. The fact that he was succeeding in no way lessened her irritation, and she knew that if they remained talking together any longer she would lose her temper and say something she would regret. What a fool she had been to imagine that their last meeting had been an indication of a changed attitude on his part. Stupidly she had read into a kiss far more than he had intended. Perhaps he had deliberately kissed her in order to put her off her guard. But put her off her guard against what? What did he expect her to do? What secret was she supposed to be hiding?
Abruptly she swung round to Derek. 'We're missing the dancing,' she said, 'and this is the first party I've been to in England.'
Derek glanced at Alvin and Romaine Anderson. 'I'll telephone you and fix an appointment for the first sitting.'
'How many will I need?' Romaine asked.
'About a dozen.'
The woman glanced at Alvin. 'I didn't think it would be so many, darling. It would be rather awkward coming down from London each time.'
'You must stay here. It will be a wonderful excuse.'
The provocative look on Romaine's face was more than Carolyn could stand, and clutching hold of Derek's hand she moved away. 'Sorry to interrupt your work,' she said tartly, 'but you're here as my guest.'
As they moved out of earshot, Derek looked at her in astonishment and then a twinkle appeared in his eye. 'I never thought you'd be jealous.'
It was her turn to be astonished, but then, realising he had misinterpreted her action, she decided it was safer to let him do so. 'All women like to be the centre of attraction,' she drawled.
"You mustn't confuse business with pleasure, me darling, and Romaine Anderson is strictly business. You're the pleasure.' He pulled her on to the dance floor. 'But don't forget you invited me to the party in order for me to meet people.'
'I know.' Now that she was away from Alvin she was contrite. 'I guess I'm feeling irritable tonight. I don't know why.'
'As long as you're not angry with me,' he said.
'Of course not.'
He drew her closer and she forced herself to follow the beat of the music. Many couples were already dancing and the vast marble hall was now full of people. She recognised many well- known celebrities from the theatre, the musical and the political world, and it brought home to her forcibly how different Alvin's life was from her own. Had it not been for Piotr he was a man she would never have met, probably never even have heard of except as a name in a gossip column. It was something she had better force herself to remember; otherwise it could lead to heartache.
Derek stayed at her side all the evening, only leaving it when Jeffrey came up and asked her to dance. "You're the belle of the ball,' Jeffrey said as he swung her into a samba. 'You shouldn't let de Mancy take up all your time.'
'I like him,' she replied.
'Maybe, but there are quite a few men here who like you! One dear old man's been ogling you from the moment you came in.'
'Old men can only ogle!' she retorted.
'I've a feeling you wouldn't like anything else,' Jeffrey laughed. 'You're a funny girl, Carolyn. A bit like a sleeping beauty who hasn't woken up.'
'Don't let your imagination run away with you. I'm a very wide-awake young woman.'
The music ended before he could reply and Derek was at her side again, precluding any further conversation.
'Time for supper,' he said. 'I can smell caviare and smoked salmon!'
The rest of the evening passed in a blur. Carolyn drank too much champagne and was only aware of music and noise and the heavy smell of scent, and the ebb and flow of voices and laughter. It was difficult to believe she was surrounded by millionaires and celebrities. Little Carolyn… brought up in an orphanage and stepmother to a Polish child who had suddenly inherited a fortune. It was a fairy tale come true, yet for her it would have no happy ending.
She tried to push away the heavy sense of depression, but knew that the only way to do so would be to admit the reason for it; and to admit that would be to acknowledge a truth which she was still fighting to hide. Alvin, she thought, it all came back to Alvin.
'You're looking a bit pale.' Derek's voice seemed to come from a long way away and she half leaned against him.
'It's the heat,' she murmured. 'Let's go out on the terrace.'
He led her through glass doors on to the marble terrace, holding her by the arm as though afraid she would fall. The cool air helped to lessen the throbbing in her head, and with it ceased the wild, strange thoughts that had engulfed her. Suddenly reality returned, and she was once more a prosaic young woman in complete control of herself.
'What's been the matter with you, Carolyn?' Derek asked quietly. 'You've been acting strangely all evening.'
'Too much champagne and not enough food.'
'That's not the truth.'
'What is the truth?' she asked.
'For me it's the fact that I've fallen in love with you.'
'Don't say that! You don't know me.'
'I know you better than you think.' He moved nearer and caught her hand. 'I wasn't going to tell you so soon, but you look so beautiful tonight that I'm afraid I'll lose you.'
'Please,' she said quickly, 'it isn't any use. I don't want you to say any more.' In the glow of the lamps she saw his expression harden.
'Is there another man?' he asked.
; 'No. It's just that I—I don't know you well enough.'
'Loving someone has nothing to do with how long you've known them.'
'Is has, for me,' she lied.
'Then I'll bide my time. As long as you don't forget what I've said. I know you better than you think,' he repeated. 'You're in a strange country surrounded by people who hate you.'
'That isn't true!'
'Of course it is—you've said as much yourself. And that's the reason you're on the defensive. But there's no need to be defensive with me. I love you and I need you, and I'm prepared to wait until you feel the same way about me.'
Carolyn shivered and drew closer to Derek. Here at least was a person who did not look at her with jealousy or dislike.
'I guess I'm not thinking straight,' she murmured. 'Nothing has been real to me from the time I got to England and learned about Piotr.'
'I know. That's why I want you to know you can rely on me.'
She shivered again and he put his hand on her shoulder. 'You're cold. I'll fetch your wrap for you. Where is it?'
'Upstairs, in one of the bedrooms.'
'I'll ask a maid.' He led her to a hammock. 'Sit here where it's sheltered. I'll be back in a moment.'
He walked away and Carolyn curled more closely into a corner of the hammock and wished she was miles away. She closed her eyes and breathed in the scent that came from the flower-filled urns that lined the terrace. The sound of a soft laugh came to her ears and she turned her head and caught a fleeting glimpse of a flame-coloured dress.
There was the sound of a husky laugh, and recognising it she drew back closer into the hammock as Romaine Anderson and Alvin came into sight. Of all the couples that had to come out on to the terrace now, how infuriating that it had to be them. Alvin had one arm on Romaine's shoulder, but the other hung limply by his side, and as they half turned, Carolyn saw the scarlet- tipped fingers hover gently down his sleeve to caress the injured hand. The woman was tiny enough to make him appear much taller, and though they were now standing still, the slight breeze on the terrace swirled the red skirts around Alvin's legs so that the two figures seemed to merge one with the other.
Silently Carolyn stood up and moved down into the garden. The music behind her grew fainter and she continued to walk until it was replaced by the sound of the sea lapping gently on the shore. A stone bench was placed in an alcove and she sank down on it and stared out to where the lights on the Isle of White shimmered on the horizon. She didn't know how long she sat there and was startled into the present by the sound of footsteps. She turned, expecting to see Derek, and was disconcerted to see Alvin. 'Why are you sitting here?' he asked. 'It's cold.'
'I was admiring the view. It's beautiful.'
'More beautiful than the one from my office window?'
Her hands clenched at her sides. 'I'd forgotten that.'
'Of course. You profess to have a bad memory.'
She stood up. 'If you're going to continue insulting me I'm not going to stay here.'
'You can't leave me alone.' His hand came out and gripped her arm. It was unexpectedly strong for so slight a man and his fingers felt like steel.
'You're hurting me!' she gasped.
'I haven't even begun.'
'Why should you hate me so? I've never done anything to harm you.'
'Perhaps I see myself as an avenger.'
'For whom? For what?'
'One day I'll tell you.'
'You'd better make it soon. I'm doing my best to get away from this place.'
'You can't You're Piotr's guardian and you're forced to stay here.'
'I might be able to find a way of leaving.'
'Do you really think you can?' He stared at her intently, his glasses glinting in the moonlight 'Yes, I can see you do. Well, try, my dear Carolyn. Keep trying.'
'I will. Staying in this country is like being in a prison. If it weren't for leaving Piotr, I'd…'
'Yes?' he said. 'You'd what?'
'I'd go back to Canada and work again.'
'You're far too beautiful to need to work. If you hadn't spent all your time with de Mancy tonight I could have introduced you to some of my friends.'
'I'm not interested in your friends.'
'They're all extremely wealthy.'
'I couldn't care less.'
'A woman not interested in bettering herself! Come, come, dear Carolyn, don't expect me to believe that!'
'I don't. You're controlled by logic and I'm controlled by emotion.'
'That's a sign of weakness. Emotion passes, but logic remains constant.'
'If you live your life by that rule, you'll never be happy.'
'On the contrary,' he said coolly, 'I enjoy my life immensely.'
'Without love there is no life.'
The word caught him by surprise and he half turned away from her. 'I wasn't thinking about love,' he said half to himself. 'It's a feeling I no longer believe in.'
'Because of Rosemary? Is that why you refuse to admit you've got any feelings?'
'Romaine wouldn't agree with that remark!'
'I was talking about love,' Carolyn reiterated. 'That's not an emotion a woman like Mrs. Anderson can evoke.'
'How narrow-minded you are,' he mocked. 'Romaine is at least honest in her feelings. I know what she feels for me, and there's no pretence about it.'
'And you don't care?'
'Not at all. A relationship based on truth has a much better chance of succeeding than one based on emotion where people never see reality.'
'You and your reality,' she choked, 'you make me sick!' She pushed past him and ran back along the garden to the terrace. As she reached it she saw Derek, her coat in his hands.
'I've been looking for you,' he said. 'Where were you?'
She was too overwrought to answer and he came over to her and placed the coat on her shoulders. 'What's wrong, Carolyn, you're like a ghost.'
'I've been talking to one,' she said in a trembling voice. 'Take me home, Derek, I don't want to stay here any longer.'
'I'll fetch my car,' he said quickly. 'Come.'
Holding her hand as though she were a child, he led her along the terrace and around the side of the house to the garage. 'Luckily I kept my keys,' he muttered. 'The Irish in me must have given me a sixth sense that you wouldn't sit out the whole party.'
'I wish I'd never come,' she said stonily. 'The Tyssens of this world don't belong in my life.'
Derek opened the car door for her and she slid into the front seat. 'You need me,' he said as he got in beside her. 'I told you that a moment ago, Carolyn. You need me.'
'Perhaps I do,' she said. 'But you must give me time.'
'Time is the one thing I won't give you,' he said firmly. 'In the past few weeks I've seen a change come over you that I don't like. These people are trying to destroy you, Carolyn.'
'That's a melodramatic thing to say.'
'Is it? Then why are you behaving so strangely? One minute you're normal, the next you look as though you're being hounded to death.'
'It's the feeling of hatred around me,' she admitted. 'If I weren't Piotr's guardian '
'But you are, and you can't do anything about it. The boy needs you.' He leaned forward and pulled her against him. 'And you need me. Let me take care of you Carolyn, then you needn't be afraid any more.'
'Do you think so?'
'I know so.'
'But I hardly know you.'
'You've known me long enough to know you can trust me.'
'Yes,' she said soberly, 'that's true.'
'Then let's use that to build something more.'
Her sense of humour began to return. 'As a proposer of marriage, Derek, you're being very unemotional for an Irishman!'
'Only because I know you've had enough emotion for one evening. But give me the chance and I'll show you exactly how I can feel.' His lips were only a breath away, but she held him off and after a moment he drew back. 'Let the Nichols believe we're engaged,' he said quietly. 'It will give
me the chance to protect you.'
'Protect me from what?' He did not answer, and the fear that had lain dormant in her for the past few weeks returned more strongly than ever. 'What have I got to be afraid of?'
'Nothing,' he said, 'not now that you have me to take care of you.'
CHAPTER NINE
Carolyn did not come down until late the next morning. When Derek had brought her home she had been too exhausted to think, but she awoke at dawn and, able to review the position more logically, had known she could not allow her dislike of Alvin to propel her into an engagement with a man she did not love.
'I must go to the cottage and tell him,' she decided, and waited impatiently for the sky to change from the pale light of dawn to the clear lemon light of morning.
Hurriedly she dressed, gulped down a cup of coffee and set off down the drive.
She had rounded the first bend when a car chugged towards her, and with a throb of nervousness she recognised Derek at the wheel.
'I was coming to see you,' she said as he got out of the car.
'I beat you to it.' The smile left his face as he saw her expression. 'What's wrong, Carolyn?'
She drew a deep breath. 'I can't go on with the engagement. It's only a pretence, and it isn't fair to you.'
'Let me be the judge of that. I want Jeffrey and his mother to know you've got someone to take care of you.'
'But it isn't fair, you'll be hurt.'
'Don't worry about me. I meant what I said last night, Carolyn. I love you and I believe you need protecting.'
'From what? You must have some idea.'
'I tell you I don't know. It's just a feeling.'
'The whole thing's fantastic,' she whispered. 'When Peter asked me to marry him I'd no idea things would turn out like this.'
'Perhaps he knew. Perhaps that's why he asked you to look after his son. He might have been afraid that if Piotr came here alone they'd try to——- ' He stopped speaking and she looked at him with horror.
'They'd try and what?'
'Get rid of him, perhaps.'
Rachel Lindsay - Mask of Gold Page 13