by Kelly Favor
She pushed her breasts into him, wanting him to grab them, to release all the tension and sexual excitement she was feeling.
“Jake,” she moaned, pushing her hips into him.
“I’m going to throw you on the bed,” he growled.
“No, the floor. Fuck me on the floor,” she whispered.
His tongue was more insistent now, as he kissed her more deeply, his hands finally sliding up the front of her shirt and grabbing her breasts, massaging her nipples until they were so stiff as to be almost painful.
She couldn’t wait for him to be inside her, to climb on top of her and take her completely.
But just as the inevitable seemed to be about to happen, Jake’s cell phone began ringing incessantly. He tried to ignore it, but it kept on ringing.
“Shit,” he muttered, breaking away from her and answering his cell.
Raven was left breathless and dazed, standing in the bedroom and waiting to see what was going on.
“Yeah?” Jake said into the phone, his back to her, one hand resting impatiently on his hip. “Right, well I’m in Florida….no…no…I don’t plan to be back anytime soon.”
There was a long pause and Jake’s head was bowed as if in focused concentration, listening intently.
“I heard you,” he said, emotionless. “Yes. Yes, I understand how serious this is.”
Raven’s heart was beating faster now, and it had nothing to do with Jake’s hands touching her body, or what he might do to her on the bed or the floor. Now her heart was beating fast out of fear and anxiety.
“I appreciate you letting me know,” he said. “But I’m not returning to New York right now to deal with this. It can wait. It’ll just have to wait, that’s all.”
Jake hung up the phone and stayed still, not turning toward her again. His head was still bowed.
“Is everything okay?” Raven asked, knowing it wasn’t.
“Yeah, everything’s fine.”
“Do you—“
Jake cut her off. “I don’t want to get into it,” he said, his voice cold and harsh.
“Oh, okay,” she said softly, trying not to feel hurt from the tone of his voice.
He put his phone away and then stared out the window, taking a deep breath. “Beautiful day,” he said, but she could tell he no longer meant it.
“Yeah, it is.”
“Come on,” Jake told her, exiting the bedroom as if their closeness from a few moments ago had never even happened. “I called some of my people and had them get everything we would need for our vacation,” he told her as they walked.
They went back downstairs and Jake brought her to the kitchen, opening the refrigerator, which was stocked with plenty of food and drink, and grabbed a couple of pre-made gourmet sandwiches, and a couple of beers.
Raven was hungry, so she didn’t mind sitting at the island in the kitchen and eating with Jake, sipping her beer and enjoying the warm Florida air as it blew in through the back doors.
But still, she couldn’t shake the feeling that whoever had called Jake just then had irrevocably changed his mood and maybe even this entire trip—and not for the better.
Jake smiled and made small talk about the town, the beach, some of the kooky neighbors that they might run into, but none of it felt real or even sincere.
The smile didn’t reach his eyes.
Raven woke up in an incredibly happy mood. Jake was still sound asleep, but when she looked out the window and saw the beach in the near distance, and the blue sky, palm trees…how could she not feel ecstatic?
Looking at Jake again as he slept, she noticed that his brow was slightly furrowed, as if even in sleep, he wasn’t at peace.
That made her think back to the strange phone call that Jake had tried to pretend didn’t happen, refusing to discuss it even as his entire mood changed. The rest of the day and into the night, he’d been somewhat withdrawn, turning on the television and watching sports while nursing a beer, as Raven had sat next to him and tried to stay upbeat.
There had been no sex or touching then, either.
They’d fallen asleep with a huge gap between them in the bed, and Raven had been too embarrassed to try and get close to him. She didn’t want to be rejected, it would have been too painful.
Now, her mood threatened to sink, but she refused. Getting out of bed, she stretched, smiling.
I’m in a mansion in Florida, and it’s amazing, I’m with the man that I love. I refuse to be sad right now.
Raven changed into her red bikini (hoping the sight of it might snap Jake out of his sullen mood) and went downstairs, hopping into the pool and swimming, luxuriating in the pleasant coolness of the water.
Even early in the morning, the Florida air was warm, in the high seventies, and the pool seemed to be heated to a perfect temperature—not too hot, not too cool.
She swam for a bit, then got out and lay in one of the lounge chairs. She was in a screened in porch area that actually was big enough to include an outdoor kitchen with a huge grill that would be great for entertaining.
Raven let the sun dry her skin, breathing deeply.
After a little while, she thought of Skylar, and realized—with a huge pang of guilt—that she absolutely needed to check in with her.
Raven called, and Sky picked up almost immediately. “Hey!” she said, sounding chipper.
“Hey,” Raven replied, shifting to a sitting position. “I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch for a couple of days.”
“Don’t be silly,” Skylar said. “It hasn’t been that long, Raven.”
“I just—I feel bad. I want to be there for you.”
“You have been. I would be so screwed if you and Jake hadn’t helped me with my healthcare costs.”
Raven’s mouth dried up, thinking about Jake’s financial problems. What would happen if he could no longer help Skylar out, and she still needed treatment?
“Well, that’s all Jake—it had nothing to do with me,” Raven replied, trying to keep her voice light.
“Speaking of Jake,” Skylar said, “I need details. What the heck’s going on with you guys? I’ve been reading and hearing all sorts of stuff on the news, but I’m sure it’s all rumor.”
Raven sighed, getting off her chair and starting to pace around the perimeter of the pool. “Actually, a lot of the rumors are true—depending on which ones you heard.”
“So Jake’s cancelling his tour, firing everyone—all of that’s true?”
Raven nodded. “Yeah. He says he doesn’t want to live that lifestyle anymore, doesn’t want to pretend to be that squeaky clean boy band character.”
“And how do you feel about him quitting his tour?”
“It’s not really my decision,” Raven said slowly.
“Yeah, but it effects you.”
“I don’t know,” Raven sighed. “He’s been acting a little strange, Sky. It’s making me afraid that he’s going to somehow blame me for everything going wrong in his career and his life. And maybe I would too, if I were him.”
“That’s bullshit,” Skylar told her.
Raven laughed. “I love that you’re giving it to me straight, Sky.”
“Well, it is bullshit. Jake’s a grown man, he can’t blame you for his problems. He needs to figure it out, and you can’t take responsibility for any of it.”
Raven smiled. “You’re pretty wise, you know that?”
“I’ll take just being pretty.”
Raven’s smile faded a little. “How are you feeling, Sky?”
“I’m doing good,” Skylar told her, but her tone had changed slightly. “The day I get chemo isn’t that bad, but it seems like the days afterward I just feel worse and worse. I’ve been pretty nauseous and just so tired.”
“I need to come back there.”
“No, you don’t. My Mom and Dad are taking care of things, and honestly I’m mostly sleeping anyhow.”
Raven took a deep breath, shaking her head. “You’d tell me if you needed me, though—
right? Because I’ll fly back today—this very hour—if you need me.”
Skylar just laughed. “Don’t be a fool. I know you’re here for me and it means a lot. But you need to live your life, and you and Jake obviously have some stuff to figure out. So go and figure it out and stop worrying about me.”
“Okay, okay. I get it.”
“Good. Don’t take any crap from him.”
“I won’t.”
“Love you, Raven.”
“Love you, Sky.”
Raven got off the phone and sat back down in her lounge chair, wondering how she’d gotten so lucky to have such an amazing friend.
And she really hoped that Skylar was telling the truth, that she really was okay and her parents were helping her. Because if it turned out that Skylar was trying to protect her and just telling her things to make Raven feel better, it would be a terrible blow.
And the guilt hadn’t gone completely away, despite Sky’s reassurances.
Still, Raven told herself then and there that if she was going to be away from her best friend, she was going to damn well make the most of her time in Florida with Jake.
She wasn’t going to sit around feeling sorry for herself when she had her health, she was with the man she loved, and she was staying in paradise.
Getting back into the pool, Raven swam a half dozen hard laps, enjoying the invigorating feeling of using her muscles to propel herself through the water, the coolness on her skin as the sun warmed her from overhead.
When she got out, she squeezed the water from her hair and watched it splatter the ground.
“Morning,” Jake’s voice croaked from inside the house.
Raven gave a little gasp and turned around. “Hey, I didn’t hear you get up!”
Jake was standing in his boxers, no shirt, his hair mussed, yawning. “How’s the water?”
“It’s amazing!” she said, aware of the fact that they were both already almost completely naked. She was wearing the string bikini he’d talked about wanting to see her in, and she was still glistening wet from the pool.
Jake blinked at her, his eyes bloodshot. “Cool.”
“You should get in,” she told him.
He shook his head. “Nah,” he said, and began shuffling into the kitchen.
Raven watched him go to the refrigerator, as she picked up a towel and started drying off. When she was dry enough to go inside without dripping everywhere, she followed him.
Jake poured himself a bowl of cereal and then walked past her to the living room, where he turned on Sports Center and began eating his cereal as he stared at the TV.
“It’s amazing out,” she said. “Do you want to go for a run or a walk in a little bit?”
Jake didn’t take his eyes from the TV. Instead, he shoved another spoonful of cereal into his mouth. “Maybe,” he said, sounding doubtful.
“I mean, we could just walk for a little bit on the beach.”
“The cool thing about being in Florida like this is we don’t need to even make a plan,” Jake said, still watching television as he spoke.
“I’m not saying we need to make some huge itinerary,” Raven replied, “but I thought maybe it would be fun to walk on the beach together.”
“We’ll see. I just want to catch up on a few things.”
She stared at him. Catch up on a few things? She realized that he was talking about catching up on the highlights from games he’d missed the previous day. It was bizarre, and she wanted to tell him so.
But then she realized that this might be a reaction to suddenly having time off for the first time in years. His life had been incredibly stressful, and he’d been constantly on the go.
Let him have his relaxation time, Raven. Don’t push him or he’ll really start to resent you.
It was disappointing, but Raven decided not to let it get her down. Instead, she went upstairs and changed into shorts, t-shirt, and flip flops, then slathered sunscreen on her somewhat pale legs, neck, arms and face, and then went back downstairs to find Jake sitting in exactly the same place, only the cereal bowl was sitting on the table.
“I’m going to go for a walk around the neighborhood,” she said.
Jake glanced at her. “Nice. Have fun!”
She almost told him where he could stick his fun, but instead gave him a perky smile. “I will have fun,” she said, determined to stay upbeat.
She turned on her heel and left the house, smiling even wider as the sunlight hit her upturned face.
There’s nothing to be bummed about. Jake’s in a little funk, but it’s not my problem.
Raven began walking, smelling the scents of flowers and trees, fresh air and the sea, as she made her way down the secluded street. Her footsteps echoed on the pavement as her flip-flops slapped the ground.
Soon, she’d worked up a bit of a sweat and she was feeling good, watching as the cars drove by, waving as a cyclist and then a jogger went past.
There was an older couple walking an even older dog, and then a kid and his friend on skateboards—people were out and about and enjoying life.
But as she continued on, she couldn’t help but occasionally think about Jake’s demeanor and the sudden change his personality seemed to have undergone since the previous night.
Raven was frustrated, because they were there together and he didn’t seem to even want to touch her, although she very badly wanted him.
What happened to the making love all day long, the walks on the beach, all of the things he’d been promising?
Raven didn’t have any answers.
The next few days fell into a predictable pattern. Raven was up early, first for a swim in the pool, then she’d lay out for about half an hour, text with Skylar or her brother for a few minutes.
After that, she’d make herself breakfast, something relatively light and healthy—and then she’d go upstairs and change into shorts and a t-shirt, put on her running shoes.
Jake would still be sleeping soundly, and she’d try not to look at him for too long or think too much about the way he was acting.
Next, Raven would go for a nice long run on the beach. It was amazing, because the beach was private, so she had it mostly to herself, although it was shared with some of the other neighbors who also owned a piece of it. As she ran, she could look out at the water and then also up to the mansions that dotted the landscape nearby.
She would typically run for just about an hour, and then she’d go back inside, usually to find Jake eating cereal and watching television.
They’d make brief conversation, and Jake would usually be distracted, almost annoyed that she was disrupting his TV watching to converse with him.
After that, Raven would go take a long shower, pamper herself with makeup and creams and then blow-dry her hair. When she was all done up and ready, she’d go back downstairs to find Jake still in front of the TV.
Raven would make herself lunch, and Jake would join her, but he’d often be eating and then strolling back into the living room to watch television as they ate, almost like he was afraid of what he might miss—even though he was watching junk like Judge Judy and old movies.
Later in the afternoon, he would start drinking.
It wasn’t as though he was getting extremely drunk, but he would just sort nurse a beer through the afternoon, then continue into the evening.
His mood would get even more subdued, if such a thing was possible, and Raven had stopped bothering trying to join him. At first, she’d thought that maybe they could drink a little together, get excited, maybe tear each other’s clothes off.
But it didn’t happen.
On the fourth night, Jake passed out early on the couch, The Godfather Part II playing at top volume as he snored, a handful of beer bottles on the table next to him and a half-empty pizza box open beside that.
He’d ordered the pizza at around eight and was asleep on the couch by nine, leaving Raven to wonder just what she was doing there.
She was growing angry and b
ored, and also a little bit scared now.
Was Jake having a nervous breakdown or something? She didn’t know, but she was starting to feel like things were reaching a tipping point. Raven wasn’t sure how much more of this she could take, with no end in sight.
She began wandering the house, and that’s when she decided, for no particular reason, to check out the garage, which she’d never bothered seeing up until that point.
Jake never parked the jeep in the garage, never opened it, and hadn’t ever mentioned it before.
So when she opened the door, Raven was absolutely stunned by what she found.
The four-car garage had been converted entirely into a state-of-the-art recording studio.
She walked into the room, turning on all of the lights to get a good look at it. The place was clearly sound proofed, and there was a sort of control room with a large mixing board, computers with huge monitors, and plenty of space—enough that there was a large leather couch and a few comfortable chairs for people to hang out on.
Raven exited the control booth through a narrow doorway and found herself in a wide open room that had a few different microphone stands, lots of amplifiers, guitars, a grand piano, keyboard, and then a separate sealed off room with a full drum set.
Microphones were everywhere, wired up to record the musicians who theoretically might play inside this space.
She stared around, wondering when Jake had built this place, and for what purpose. Had he actually recorded any of his previous albums here?
It looked and smelled like it hadn’t been used in some time—there was a mustiness, and much of the equipment was covered in a light layer of dust.
After strolling around the studio, Raven finally decided she’d seen enough. Also, she was afraid Jake might come in and accuse her of snooping.
Giving the room one last parting glance, she turned off all the lights and closed the door behind her.
Raven went back into the TV room, turned off the television set. Jake stirred on the couch, groaning.
“What’s going on?” he asked, squinting up at her blearily.
“You fell asleep,” she told him.
“So?”
“So, the TV was on full blast and you weren’t watching it.”