Never known to fail. A moment of respite as he imagines reading over the confession when his attention is alerted to the commotion in the street outside. Beyond the grimed window pane he sees a guard pushing back spectators as they try to surge forward over the metal barrier. He has given instructions that there be no ugly scenes, no booing, no weeping women with rosary beads, beseeching O’Kane to confess. Journalists jump on windows and roof tops to catch a glimpse of the infamous figure and in the corridor he hears doors banging and footsteps flying. The ‘Fox’ has arrived. He does not go out to have a look. He waits until Francis, a young, conscientious guard puts his head through the door and then indulges his curiosity - ‘What does he look like, Flann?’
He smiles at the pragmatism of the answer - ‘He looks like any other young lout in an anorak and five days of dirty growth on his chin.’
The superintendent broods, winds his watch, listens to the lisp of the little tick, examines the sleek black hands, like sewing thread, as they meet over the digit eleven. In three days himself and his team should be congratulating one another on having a confession and he will celebrate with yet another glass of his milky medicine.
Interrogation
They are on first names, Gerry and Frank and Michen. Easy does it, as Gerry says, he being the smooth-talking one. He is younger, informal, pulling his shirt sleeves up to show that they are all mates together.
‘Bit of a rough ride over, had you?’ he asks and knowing there will be no answer he says to understand that the boys get a bit hyper once there’s press and cameras around. They sit across a varnished brown table, their three sets of elbows leaning on it, the castors wobbling this way and that. As Gerry explains in a soft reasonable voice, all they want is to make things as painless as possible for everybody.
‘How long will I be kept here?’ O’Kane snarls.
‘That’s up to you,’ Frank snarls back.
‘We’ll help you if you help us,’ Gerry adds.
‘I’m entitled to a solicitor,’ O’Kane says, then holds up his wrists, pink and ridged from the way they had handcuffed him on the drive over. He licks them.
‘Of course you’re entitled to a solicitor ... no one’s stopping you . . . but if you take my advice we’ll work it out here between the three of us . . . a solicitor will complicate matters at this juncture. Look, we have no papers, no pens, no note taking . . . it’s a nice easy friendly atmosphere . . . you and Frank and me,’ Gerry says.
‘Where’s Father John?’ Frank asks.
‘Precisely, we start with Father John . . . the whole diocese has gone hysterical . . . masses offered for him every morning . . . very popular man,' Gerry says.
‘What the fuck are you talking about.’
‘We’re talking about three missing people, a woman and a child and a priest.’
‘They must be joyriding,’ O’Kane says and sneers.
‘Don’t give us that shit,’ Frank says.
‘Easy now, Frank . . . Michen here has had a tough life . . . packed off to a home at ten or eleven . . . your poor mother dying. Do you want to talk about your poor mother? It’ll help. They say a grief like that, bottled up, is a bad thing for a child . . . what age were you?’
‘She was smothered in her coffin and I know who did it.’
‘Where’s the priest?’ Frank asks, leaning in close to him.
‘You have the wrong man,’ O’Kane tells him.
‘But you know they’re missing.’
‘You fuckers set me up . . . I’ve never heard of these people.’
‘A gun was taken off you at approximately nine thirty-five this morning ... it had been fired a few times . . . what were you shooting?’
‘A hit from a bullet doesn’t always mean that people die ... it can be a shot in the air.’
‘Mich . . . what’s the story? The sooner you get it off your chest, the sooner you will be out of here . . . the superintendent in this unit is as decent a man as you could find ... a family man ... if you co-operate so will he . . . he’s no sadist,’ Gerry says.
‘I was shooting vermin.’
‘What kind of vermin?’ Frank, at his most sarcastic.
‘So you were in the woods . . . maybe you came across people in the woods ... or you might have heard them . .. crying out for help,’ Gerry, still solicitous.
‘I want cigarettes.’
‘You’ll get your fucking cigarettes when you answer these questions . . . where are the missing people?’
‘You won’t get my dabs on them and you can’t keep me here much longer. I know the law . . . I’m here under Section Thirty.’
‘Section Thirty my arse . . . where are they . . . either you tell us or we’ll drag it out of you.’
‘Now now Frank . . . we’re all a bit het up. You see, Michen, there’s a fierce responsibility on our heads. The whole country is asking, not just two men in uniform. These people have to be somewhere in this locality and you’re the one that knows it ... you were seen with the woman and the child . . . people saw you in the back of her car, crouched down.’
‘She gave me a lift a few miles up the road . . . then I got out because I don’t go near towns.’
‘Where did she go?’
‘Ask the assholes in the town. She was a mover and shaker ... ye should have found her by now . . . get me my fucking cigarettes.’
‘Look if you don’t level with us, the boys from Dublin will handle this and they’ll put the squeeze on you . . . up in the upstairs room, if you get my drift.’
‘Knackers have them.’
‘What knackers?’
‘I’m not telling you. If I tell I’ll be framed.’
‘Are they alive?’
‘The woman and the child are alive ... I saw them Wednesday . . . they had food, they were watching ^V.’ ‘So they’re in a house.’
‘I’m not saying.’
‘Are they in this locality?’
‘No . . . they’re hundreds of miles away.’
‘And they’re hostages?’
‘I told you all I’m fucking going to tell you.’
‘Is the priest alive?’
‘It was a robbery that went wrong. The bathroom window was open and Joe and I waited inside . . . Joe conked him with an iron bar . . .’
‘Who’s Joe?’
‘I can’t tell you.’
‘Cunt. You’ll go down one way or another . . . you saw that crowd waiting outside when you were brought in ... there are men that will be more than happy to take you for a ride.’
‘I’ll get your wife and your kids, scumbag.’
‘You’ll be behind bars for thirty years, scumbag.’ ‘Look, Frank, why don’t you go and get a cup of coffee and Michen and myself will sort this out ... oh and ask one of the lads to go get cigarettes.’
‘Bastard,’ O’Kane says.
‘He’s a tough man, Frank, but don’t get on the wrong side of him. Anyhow, to get back to business ... if Joe conked the priest, does it mean that he killed him?’
‘I saw the blood pouring out of his head ... he was not afraid to die . . . ’
‘So he’s dead?’
‘He didn’t die straight away . . . they put him in a Janeway in a wood and shone the lights of the car on
him ... he tried to run away but he couldn’t . . . God’s brother.’
‘Who shot God’s brother?’
‘The knackers ... if she’s not dropped outside a shop by midnight tomorrow I’ll grass them up.’
‘In the name of Jesus, grass them now.'
‘Off the wall . . . off the wall,’ Gerry says as he flings his jacket down in frustration.
‘We know he’s off the wall but what have we got?’ the superintendent asks him.
‘He shot the priest ... he turned the car lights on in a lane in the wood and made him kneel down . . .’
‘We have him . . . he’s admitted to it.’
‘He won’t sign it ... he won’t fecking sign it.’
&nb
sp; ‘He will sign it.’
‘He won’t . . . sign . . . it.’
‘Go back in ... bring Kinsella with you, all twenty-two stone of him, hold the pen in the fecker’s hand and tell him it’s us or the Dublin crowd . . . the rat pack. No, on second thoughts, this is country business . . . we’re running this. He’s a country boy, he needs country muscle.’
Absolution
The elderly priest and O’Kane shake hands and stand in the little visiting parlour, each waiting for the other to take a seat. There is a tray with cups, saucers and a plate of biscuits. He is an old priest, Father Christopher, kind, quiet spoken, happiest when reading his missal, spring cleaning his soul for eternity.
‘How are you Michen . . . how are you doing?’
‘Bad . . . they’re bastards . . .I met you in Killar-ney . . .’
‘I don’t think so.’
‘You were at the tote window . . . you didn’t have your collar on.’
‘Well, I’m glad to see you now, to see you’re bearing up.’
‘I have things on my mind ... a lot of things.’
‘Yes, Superintendent McBride said you asked for a priest.’
‘I did ... I do.’
‘Is it in a confessional sense, Michen, that you asked for a priest?’
‘What else.’
‘Now . . . before we continue, I want you to understand something. It would be a very onerous position for me to be put in ... a position I would prefer not to be in . . .if . . .if for instance you had something of import to tell me.’
‘Is God like you?’
‘Oh no ... God is God. He is above everything . . . everyone.’
‘Is he understanding?’
‘He is . . . he is also all knowing and all seeing . . . omnipotent . . . omniscient.’
‘I don’t like the Pope . . . he’s a bastard, I wrote to tell him.’
‘Do you pray, Michen?’
‘I said a prayer for them missing people . . . did God see what I done?’
‘He’d see what you done and whatever you done he’d understand it.’
‘Will I be forgiven?’
‘I believe you will . . . remember Jesus in his agony in the Garden of Gethsemane . . . how he asked forgiveness for his executioners - Father forgive them for they know not what they do.’
‘I’m not a psychopath . . . I’m not mad . . . it’s them fuckers that’s making me mad.’
‘Tell me, Michen, did you know Father John?’
‘Not well.’
‘But you called on him.’
‘He was wearing a gold watch that had writing on the back of it ... it was given to him as a present ... I thought of fecking it off him but then I didn’t because I knew they’d frame me . . . he was a good man.’
‘As a lay person would you like me to act as a mediator between the guards and the detectives and yourself ?’
‘They’re assholes ... I want you to hear my confession.’
‘I would rather not.’
But O’Kane is already kneeling, blessing himself, saying the prayer that he said as a child when he went into the confessional - ‘Bless me Father because I have sinned.’ The priest takes the purple stole that he carries in case of coming on an accident and puts it around his neck and kneels and closes his eyes, dreading what will be revealed.
‘It was last Thursday ... it was a gang doing a house and it went wrong . . . pissing rain ... we found the top of the bathroom window open and the curtain pulled back . . . The priest drove the car into the garage and came around the side of the house . . . Joe hit him with an iron bar ... we tied him up and put him in the back seat ... I drove him to a car park . . . Joe followed in his car because he wanted no shit ... I had to drive the priest to my own area ... we spent the night in a house . . .I had a sleep . . . the birds wakened me in the morning and I brought him out.’
‘Did he take long to die?’
‘No, he went fast.’
‘Did he say anything?’
‘He asked me to spare his life . . . the woman is dead too.’
‘And the child, is the child dead or alive?’
‘I don’t know . . . with the knackers you can never assume . . .’
‘Where are their bodies?’
‘I won’t tell you.’
‘You can tell God . . . it’s God you’re talking to through me.’
‘You’re not to tell them out there . . . you can’t break the confessional oath.’
‘They must be told.’
‘You can’t ... I confessed before God . . . I’m not confessing to them . . . I’m not I’m not I’m not.’ ‘There’s a child, maybe alive ... just think of God’s rejoicing at this eleventh hour if you save a little lamb from the slaughter . . . just think.’
‘I don’t remember shooting him ... maybe he ran away.’
‘Why did you kill the priest?’
‘I had to ... he was going to baptise the devil’s child . . . the woman was a devil too, a she-devil ... a sinner.’ As the priest intones the words of the absolution they seem hollow, they seem a blasphemy to God and having finished he gets up shakily and goes out, torn between his duty to God and his duty to mankind.
The superintendent and the others know that the priest knows something but that he cannot tell them, so shaken was he when he came out that a guard was sent to the public house to fetch a large brandy and ginger ale. He is sipping it slowly, twirling the glass, looking out the window at people passing by and all he seems to see are young mothers with children and all he can think of is a child screaming over a dead mother, trying to bring her back to life. He can see the guards looking at him and respecting his plight.
‘So it’s bad,’ the Superintendent says.
‘It’s a shocker,’ he says quietly.
‘I have only ten more hours . . . then I’ll have to let him go.’
‘I’d tell you everything if I could.’
‘I know that Father. I know that . . . can you tell us if you think he would take a life . . .’
‘I think he would but then again it could be just fantasy ... he comes out with strange remarks ... for instance he said he saw me down in Killarney at the tote window with my collar off . . . I’ve never been to a race meeting.’
‘That’s baloney,’ Frank says. ‘That’s to put you off the scent . . . our little twister O’Kane knows his stuff . . . he’s been juggling the authorities since he was eleven years ... in one of the homes he was shown a piece of paper that said “My future”, and asked to finish the sentence he wrote “is very bad”. Send him out to the street corners of any slum in any city and he’ll see kids whose future is very bad and they haven’t turned criminal.’
‘What is it that warps a child . . . what is it that changes a child from being a child?’ the priest asks.
‘I can’t answer that Father. But if somebody had taken that pup ... his father or an uncle and given him the hammering of a lifetime ... we wouldn’t be crawling on our knees begging him to tell us where missing people are. The state spoils them ... all this pussyfooting, all this hand wringing ... his childhood, his loneliness, his mother . . . lots of kids with no mothers who don’t steal cars and don’t burn cars and don’t take women at gunpoint . . . little creep, little coward.’
‘Time, gentlemen, time,’ the superintendent says, holding up the watch he has had to remove from his wrist on account of a rash he has developed. His insides are scalding.
‘There’s something I feel I want to say,’ the priest says, rising, lifting his hands helplessly - ‘The day I was ordained, there were five of us and afterwards we were all told to hold hands and so we did. We held hands and then there was a white linen cloth wound around each of our hands, like a bandage and we were told to take it and keep it and give it to someone very special when the need arose . .. my mother died last autumn and I put that cloth in her hands in the coffin. If I had it now I would put it into that boy’s hands, but I don’t have it, I don’t have it . . . and
I am telling you in the only language that is permitted to me.’
‘I see ... I do see,’ the superintendent says grimly. Then laughter started up, loud peals, a baying and their heads turned to the door.
‘It’s your man . . . it’s one of his stunts,’ Frank says and they wait expecting it to stop, except that it doesn’t, it mounts, it magnifies, growing more macabre, more threatening with each bout and they look from one to the other in dismay.
‘He has been laughing now seventeen minutes,’ the superintendent says holding up his watch.
‘I make it eighteen sir.’
‘Eighteen minutes of animal laughter.’
‘Bizarre.’
The laughter went on unabated and there was something terrible, something eerie in it, as if it would never end and they would never stop hearing it, and even when it did die down, it would be like a poltergeist along those corridors, O’Kane’s curse on them.
A Plea
He is with his grandmother. Through the observation hole they see them kissing, embracing, crying and then sitting close as the grandmother takes clean socks and underpants from a pillow slip and lays them tenderly on his lap as if they are gifts.
‘How are you, son?’
‘Not so bad,’ he says and suddenly starts to laugh and the laugh frightens her because it is as if his insides are being laughed out of him. She holds him to contain it, to calm him in some way and eventually does.
‘Why do you laugh Michen . . .is it because you haven’t slept?’
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