by John Peel
I have to hand it to Solo and Chewie—they certainly know what to do when blasters are firing. They had us all aboard, the door locked, and the Falcon powered before the Imperials even managed to get close to us. Ben and I strapped in, Artoo and Threepio plugged in, and Solo and Chewie took us up faster than even I imagined possible.
But that didn’t get us out of trouble. There were Imperial cruisers in orbit—waiting for us.
This was the first time I’d ever been off Tatooine, but I didn’t get the chance to enjoy it because the Falcon was dodging shots. Everything was exploding all around us, and we were getting thrown around like crazy. Artificial gravity has its drawbacks, and one is that it takes a few microseconds to switch back and forth when the ship’s on violent maneuvers. Solo must have been at least half the pilot he claimed to be, because he dodged the fighters and took us to lightspeed.
And I was too shaken up to really appreciate it. But the change was still absolutely incredible. The universe goes all weird and then—wham! Lightspeed, and everything’s still, like you’re not moving.
Time in lightspeed isn’t really like time in the rest of the universe. There, time ticks away on chronos and things happen. Once you break the light barrier, though, it’s not that simple. I don’t understand the physics very well—I’m not sure anyone does, really—but you can work out exactly how far and how long you need to go in which direction to get you to where you’re going.
I just hoped that Solo or Chewie could plot a course the way they could dodge Imperial cruisers. If they could, everything would be fine.
All my life, I’ve longed for something to happen to me. Something important. And now that it has, I’m not sure how to handle it. I’m glad to be off Tatooine. But I still haven’t seen anything of the stars, or the galaxy at large. And, to be honest, I’m really just a passenger along for the ride. Ben says he needs my help, but I haven’t been much help so far. He had to save me in the cantina, and it’s Solo and Chewie who got us off Tatooine.
Maybe I’ll have something to do soon, other than practice trying to use the Force. Not that this isn’t a great challenge. Ben has already taught me the basics, like the proper grip and ready position. I never realized how important body positioning is. The idea is to start with just the right stance, so you’re immediately ready for attack or defense. And to avoid standing with your feet too wide apart, which kills your speed and agility. As Ben says, you must feel your center of balance.
My training consists of lots of drills. Mostly using my lightsaber against a seeker robot. The robot sends out laser bolts and I have to ward them off—which is no easy feat. And when I’m done with the drills, I’m instructed to visualize them!
Sometimes Ben stands behind me and guides me as I move from the first to the fourth defensive postures. As I listen to Ben’s voice, I try to empty my thoughts of everything, to use wide circular motions, fluid and confident, and to parry with a full movement. By focusing on the pattern of the drill, I’m supposed to tune the world out. That’s the goal: to let go of all rational thought and allow the Force to do the work.
Unfortunately, it feels like I’m doing all the work. So, to help me get the hang of it, Ben had me use my lightsaber—while blindfolded! I had to just let go and feel. And guess what? I really sensed something. Some sort of energy. It was incredible! It was almost as though I could see in my mind’s eye which way to move. Maybe Ben’s right and I do have some aptitude for the Force—like my father had.
I hope so. I don’t want to be in some great quest and great adventure and end up just being a passenger. I want to be able to do my share.
EIGHTH ENTRY
Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse, they’ve really plummeted.
Ben’s dead.
I’m still trying to sort out my thoughts and feelings. I mean, I’d only known Ben for a day, really. Yet I miss him even more than I miss my aunt and uncle… and I spent my life with them.
There was just something so special, so alive about Ben. Being around him was like being around the father I had never had… but always dreamed about.
And now he’s gone.
NINTH ENTRY
Ben was teaching me so much about the Force, and without him, I don’t know if I’ll ever hear about it again. So I’d better record what I can remember, while it’s still fresh in my mind.
If Ben was the last Jedi, then I’ll never become one. But I know what I have learned from Ben has made a huge difference in my life. I can feel the power around me and within me. I know his teachings are important enough to hold on to. And pass along.
Ben and I spoke a lot about the Force—the energy force created by all living things. Ben called it “an aura that at once controls and obeys,” although he said no one, not even the Jedi Masters or scientists, could find a true definition for it. I guess that’s because it’s in one’s mind as much as outside of it. It’s not something you can put your finger on to control and study. You have to believe in its power to access its power.
Anyway, if this seems confusing, that’s okay. Nobody understands it right away. Ben said that learning the Force requires great patience—that it’s a lifelong education. He seemed to think that even at his age and level of mastery, he was still learning.
Once, Ben said, the Jedi-in-training would spend a great deal of time contemplating and opening themselves gradually to the Force. But that’s when the Jedi were the leaders of the galaxy and the keepers of the peace. Things have changed. There’s no time for that now. Ben wanted me to train in a faster way. A more active, hands-on approach. Still, the essential teachings are as they always were. Learn to trust the Force. Learn to open up the senses and feel the Force.
Sometimes I think I can do this. But other times I’m not so sure. Ben told me to trust my feelings and to let go of trying to control myself. There are times when I have to divorce my actions from conscious control. I’m not exactly sure when to do this, but Ben said I’ll know when the time comes.
The workings of the Force aren’t always direct, but they’re strong. Because of it, Ben knew I was coming and would need his help when the Sand People struck. Somehow, if you’re open, the Force gives you information. Like knowing when someone is following you without actually seeing anyone. It’s a lot like having a sixth sense, really.
It can also help you influence the weak-minded, or those accustomed to obeying orders, like the stormtroopers. Ben demonstrated this numerous times. He would say something with such total confidence that others would believe anything he said—even repeat what he had said. It was unbelievable! It was like Ben hypnotized them.
I think one of the hardest lessons for me is not to be fooled by appearances. Ben looked like a shabby old hermit, but that wasn’t the truth. The Falcon looks like a pile of junk, but that’s not the truth, either. I have to confess, if my friends were around, I would have felt ashamed of Ben and the Falcon upon first glance. But I’m learning that appearances don’t count for much. Imperial troops look smart and impressive, but at heart they’re just cowards and bullies.
Ben told me that the Force can accomplish miracles. That anything is possible when you are open to the Force and you let it flow through you. That’s how I’m supposed to use my lightsaber—let it flow from me. It’s all about letting yourself go and trusting the Force.
Of course, very few men recognize or feel the Force. And even fewer can use it. But a Jedi feels the Force, just like any other physical object. A Jedi can harness its power.
One of the most important things Ben taught me is that if one man suffers, all men suffer. If evil is not stopped, it will rule over all men one day—whether they’ve opposed it or ignored it. And so, with Ben’s teachings under my belt, I mark my next challenge: to fight for justice against evil and tyranny.
I’ve always been afraid that I’d be stuck on a farm my whole life. But that’s no longer the case. For one thing, the farm’s gone. For another, I can feel a difference inside me. Maybe it’s
the Force. Maybe it’s just everything I’ve been through. But I’m not the same Luke Skywalker I was just a few days ago.
TENTH ENTRY
It’s so bizarre. Not much has happened in my life that’s worth remembering. And yet, in just two days, everything’s completely changed. I found a living link to my father, and lost him. And I even managed to rescue a princess on the way.
I’d better do this the way I’ve been doing everything, and that’s to try to tell it in order, and make some sense out of what happened. So here goes…
On the way to Alderaan, I kept busy with my exercises—especially deflecting the laserbolts from the seeker. I was excited to learn and was moving at an exhausting rate. But I couldn’t stop thinking about my aunt and uncle. What happened to them was so sick. So painful. At the time I didn’t realize how much my anger was building. Or that I should watch out for something like that. Most people would have told me I deserved to be upset, and that it was perfectly normal to feel this way.
But Ben warned me how easy and natural it could be to turn to anger, fear, and aggression—the dark side of the Force. He could see the anger in me, and the revenge I wanted on the Empire and Darth Vader for what they’d done to my family. Ben told me that such emotions are very strong, but that they tap into the dark side of the Force. And by entering the dark side, you strengthen its hold on the evil in yourself. “If you give in to those feelings,” he promised me, “then you give in to the dark side. You will become like Darth Vader.”
That’s the scary thought; I wouldn’t want to end up like that. But, at the same time, I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to give up my anger and desire for revenge. Vader and the others must pay for what they’ve done. I don’t know if Ben really understood what he was asking of me. He said that he did, that he had to give up his own quest for vengeance, too. I guess he meant when Vader killed my father. I know that upset Ben a lot.
So what do I do? I don’t want to end up seduced by the dark side. But I want to see Vader pay for his crimes. If the Force is with me, Ben said the correct path will become clear. I really hope so, because I could use a little clarity right now.
As I was thinking about this, Ben gave a cry and almost collapsed.
He assured me he was all right, but that he’d felt a great disturbance in the Force. Like a billion voices all crying out at once. He said he’d never felt anything like it before, and I could see that it bothered him. He didn’t know what had caused it.
I was afraid that the strain of everything was getting to be too much for him. I didn’t know how old Ben was, but he certainly wasn’t used to all of this activity anymore.
I should have known better by then—that Ben was stronger than he looked—but I didn’t completely trust Ben’s feeling for the Force.
Then Han said we were ready to come out of lightspeed near Alderaan. That was really exciting news, because I was picturing us landing at the royal palace, being greeted as honored guests… maybe even dining with royalty, that sort of thing.
But the Millennium Falcon didn’t come out into normal space next to Alderaan as planned. We came out of lightspeed in an asteroid belt, rocks of all shapes and sizes whizzing all around us. Han had to do some tricky flying to avoid getting us smashed to bits.
My first thought, of course, was that he’d messed up his navigation. But the truth was a lot worse than that. I could see that we were close to Alderaan’s star, and this was where Alderaan should have been…
But it wasn’t.
It took us a while to realize what we were seeing, and longer to accept the truth: the rubble and rocks were all that was left of Alderaan.
That was the disturbance in the Force that Ben had felt, the voices all crying out at once: the cry of all the people on Alderaan just before they died.
Now we were in serious trouble. I mean, we were stunned by the planet’s destruction and the deaths of all those people. It didn’t seem real somehow. I’d never been to Alderaan, but I’ve heard it was lovely and peaceful. And now it was dust and rocks, everyone on the planet gone.
What were we going to do now? The message from Princess Leia had told us to take the droids to her father, and that he’d know what to do with them. Now her father was dead. Han still needed to be paid, and we couldn’t cover the charge. All of these thoughts were whirling about in my head as we came under the attack of a TIE fighter.
This was the first time I’d ever seen a TIE in action. It’s sort of dumpy, with stubby wings, but it sure can move. This one fired off a single burst at us, and then ran for it. Han started to chase him, then realized something important. TIE fighters can’t go to lightspeed, so they always have Imperial cruisers nearby. But there weren’t any around. So where was this one from?
The answer was literally right in front of us. We all thought it was a small moon at first. As we got closer, though, we realized it wasn’t a small anything—it was a huge round space station.
And it had an unbreakable tractor beam that grabbed hold of the Falcon and dragged her in.
We were in serious, serious trouble. The question in our minds was whether this had destroyed Alderaan. And it now had a hold of us. Did they know we were heading here? Had they destroyed the planet to stop us from reaching it? Or had we just accidentally stumbled onto something that had nothing to do with us?
Ben and Han came up with a plan. Because of Han’s smuggling, the Falcon is equipped with hidden compartments to hide illegal cargo in case he’s boarded and searched. Instead of cargo, though, he planned to hide all of us. He rigged the records to make it look like we’d all abandoned ship at Tatooine and left the Falcon to make the jump to hyperspace herself. With any luck, the troopers would believe this story and go back to hunting for us on Tatooine.
Well, the first part of our plan worked without a hitch. We hid while the Imperials pulled the Falcon into the docking bay. Troopers came aboard and searched. They found the doctored log, and no sign of any of us in the sealed and lined compartments. They fell for the story and all filed out.
I was glad to get out of the hiding place. Being in a confined space with a Wookiee can result in serious bruising. They don’t like being cramped. We were free for now, but it wouldn’t last. We needed an escape plan, and Ben came up with one.
There had to be a tractor beam holding us in place. He’d deactivate it, and then the Falcon could take off. That is, if we weren’t chased by TIE fighters or whatever else this huge station had on board. It wasn’t much of a plan, but it was all we had, so even Han agreed to it.
He wasn’t happy about it, though.
The troopers had left, but they were bound to be back. So when two of them returned, Han and Chewie took them by surprise—and stunned them both. I winced at the noise they made, but nobody else seemed to notice.
Ben had Han and me dress up in the trooper’s armor and stand guard. That way, it looked like we were real guards on duty. The only problem was that I’m under the height requirements for an Imperial trooper. The uniform was kind of loose on me. Still, if I was seen at a distance I looked passable. I hoped!
We all snuck into a small command office near the Falcon. The gantry officer inside was taken out by a blow from Chewie and a blast from Han. With all the noise they were making, I thought we’d be found for sure.
Artoo managed to plug into the station’s computer. Like I’ve said before, he’s really smart and great at mechanical stuff. He broke into the station files and discovered where the main controls for the tractor beam were, so Ben could go off and sabotage them.
Before he left, Ben said something about detecting a familiar pattern in the Force. I didn’t pay much attention to it then, but later I realized what had happened: Ben had detected Darth Vader on board! He didn’t tell me because he was afraid I’d go running off to try to kill him. If I’d known, that’s exactly what I’d have done. It’s a good thing Ben didn’t tell me, because I might be dead right now.
Instead, Ben told us to stay put. I ha
d intended to obey him, but things changed. I mean, I wanted revenge on the Empire for what they’d done to my uncle and aunt, those innocent Jawas, and the whole planet of Alderaan. But I wasn’t stupid. This space station was the size of a small moon—not small at all. There had to be thousands of people on board. So trying to take them on for revenge was definitely the last thought on my mind.
But then See-Threepio translated Artoo’s excited beeping. He kept saying, “I’ve found her!” and “She’s here!” I’ve never seen a droid look so excited in my life, and it took a couple of minutes to get him calmed down to the point where he could tell us what he meant.
It was Princess Leia Organa he was talking about. Somehow, she was aboard the station, in the detention area! I couldn’t believe it. I mean, she’d been on that ship that had been attacked over Tatooine. I wasn’t sure whether she’d escaped or been captured or what, but I had never expected her to be here, of all places. On the station that had probably destroyed her home planet and all of her family, too.
And she was going to be next. Artoo told us that there was a termination order on her. They planned to execute her!
That was when I made up my mind that it was time for me to act. So far, all I’d really done was hang around and follow orders—mostly Ben’s, but with some of Han’s thrown in, too. But I couldn’t let them kill the princess. Mostly, I think, because she was just too beautiful to let that sort of thing happen to her. Also because she had been relying on Ben to help her out. Ben knew her and obviously admired her. I had to do something to get her free.
There was no way I could do that on my own. But if Han were to help me, I thought maybe we could manage it. Han complains a lot, but he’s really good with a blaster, and can be very inventive… especially when he’s in a tight spot.
So all I had to do was to convince him to help me rescue the princess. Well, the word princess alone grabbed his interest. He refused to risk his neck, though, until I pointed out that she was rich and would obviously give him a big reward for his help. I didn’t mention that probably most of her wealth had gone up in smoke with Alderaan. The thought of more money helped swing him around—and he agreed to help me rescue her!