Shadows in the Grass

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Shadows in the Grass Page 37

by Beverley Harper


  He could see she meant it. ‘Cam should grow up understanding the Zulus.’

  She snuggled into him. ‘He’ll need brothers and sisters too.’

  ‘Indeed he will.’

  ‘And not too much younger either.’

  ‘Perish the thought.’

  She was reaching for him. ‘Don’t think me wanton or anything, my darling, but if we don’t go upstairs right now, I could very well ravish you here and now.’

  Dallas rose hastily. ‘Oh, all right,’ he pretended to grumble, then reached down and lifted her in his arms. ‘I love you very much,’ he whispered.

  TWELVE

  The next morning, anxious to hide nothing from Sarah lest she accuse him of deception, Dallas tethered the carriage outside Mrs Watson’s boarding house and, while Lorna was busy packing and organising the loading of both their possessions, walked the three doors to the house he had been expected to call home. There was no sign of his in-laws’ buggy. The maid admitted him and Dallas found Sarah in the front parlour. She greeted him warily.

  ‘Where are your parents?’

  ‘They left early this morning for the farm.’

  ‘Good.’ He chose a chair opposite her and sat down. ‘I have something to tell you.’ Now the moment had arrived, Dallas found he was quite calm. He owed his wife nothing, not even respect.

  Sarah’s eyes were accusing.

  ‘Why do you look at me as if I have let you down?’

  She lowered her lids. ‘Because you have.’

  ‘I?’ Dallas couldn’t believe his ears. ‘You have a strange way of regarding responsibility, Sarah. How, in your estimation, have I disappointed you?’

  ‘We are married,’ she whispered. ‘You took vows.’

  ‘Yes,’ he agreed. ‘With one arm twisted up my back.’

  ‘Many are forced into wedlock. They make the best of it.’ She raised her eyes to his, and he saw determination on her face. ‘You promised to love, honour and keep safe –’

  ‘It was preferable to the gallows.’ Dallas found he was growing angry.

  ‘Can we not try?’

  He waited a moment for his irritation to subside. Sarah was her father’s daughter all right. No sign of contrition, only concern for herself. ‘I have less inclination to try now than ever,’ Dallas said finally. ‘On our wedding night I showed you a letter and told you it was from the only woman in this world I could ever love.’

  Sarah nodded.

  ‘She’s here.’

  ‘What?’ The single word carried fear.

  ‘After leaving here yesterday I went to seek my old room at Mrs Watson’s. Lorna was there. I had no idea.’

  ‘A fine story,’ Sarah snapped. ‘Surely you don’t expect me to believe it.’

  ‘Believe what you like. I care little for your so-called sensitivities. The truth escapes you so often it may be hard to recognise.’ Dallas kept his tone mild but Sarah behaving as a wronged wife was intensely annoying. ‘You will hear the gossip soon enough. I’m telling you so that you are prepared, though, God knows, you don’t deserve that courtesy. Lorna and I will be living together. In all but name, she is my wife. We already have a son. Though circumstances in Scotland did not allow us to be together, out here we have no intention of hiding our love. I wish you no embarrassment, Sarah, and I’m not trying to hurt you. We would never have lived together, you know that.’

  ‘I had hoped –’

  Dallas shook his head. ‘You’ve told too many lies, Sarah.’

  She hung her head. ‘My father –’

  Dallas sprang from his chair, frustration bursting to the surface. ‘God damn it, Sarah. Despite your responsibility for this farce you have the audacity to threaten me with exposure. To hell with your bloody father. I have no wish to stoop so low, but you force my hand. Thulani would be easy to find. If needs must, I will make public the entire sordid story. Tell your damned father I said so.’

  ‘No!’ The word was wrung from her. ‘I’m trying to warn you.’

  He paced. ‘Unless I miss my guess, your father is well satisfied. Your happiness means as much to him as mine did. He cares for his reputation, nothing else. If his son-in-law behaves badly, he will go out of his way to play the martyr. In a way, that would suit him better than acting the doting father-in-law. He likes me no more than I care for him. If he so much as squeaks one word against me I will make good my promise to reveal the truth.’

  ‘I’ll deny it.’

  ‘Try. The baby’s colour will speak for itself. Thulani’s evidence will do the rest. There are only so many midwives in this town. Whatever your father may pay to buy silence, I can afford to double. Threaten my happiness any further than you already have and you will be forced to leave Africa, never to see your son again. Don’t make this harder than it already is, Sarah. You’ve done enough harm.’

  ‘It’s not fair,’ she cried out. ‘Nobody loves me. Thulani hates me too.’

  In a moment of clarity, Dallas saw the real Sarah. An only child, she’d been spoiled rotten. On the surface she appeared well adjusted and sweet, yet underneath lay a selfishness that would have been easy for her father to manipulate. Between them, they’d hatched a solution to Sarah’s self-imposed predicament – he to protect reputation, she for something deeper and more devious. Dallas had no idea whether her relationship with the Zulu was founded on love or lust. Sarah had been willing enough to invite him into her bed for those few nights Dallas stayed in this house. She had gambled and lost. The reality of that left her with nothing, capable only of self-pity. He stood in silence, wondering how far she would go to try to keep him from leaving.

  Sarah’s dark eyes filled with tears and she dabbed at them with delicate little movements. Furtively she kept glancing at Dallas to see his reaction. When she finally spoke, it was all he could do not to laugh outright at a blatant last-ditch attempt to get her way which was so transparently untrue that even Sarah didn’t look as though she believed it. ‘I could have loved you. I liked you well enough.’

  ‘Enough to lie, as we both know.’

  ‘I had no choice.’

  ‘Of course you did.’

  ‘You don’t know my father.’

  ‘Oh, I think I do.’

  Tears flowed unchecked. ‘It wasn’t my fault. Thulani forced himself on me.’

  Dallas shook his head. ‘Don’t try to make more trouble, you silly girl. For God’s sake, Sarah, stop deluding yourself. You played with fire and the inevitable happened. Face it.’

  She licked at the salty liquid running past her mouth. ‘I know what you think of me, Dallas, but I do love my child and it breaks my heart that Thulani took him away. I can’t go home, the baby is there.’

  ‘And well cared for.’ Dallas didn’t believe this story either. Sarah’s play-acting was getting on his nerves. He felt anxious to leave, get back to Lorna and all that was honest. ‘What will you do now? When the rumours start to circulate it will be very difficult for you here.’

  ‘My cousin, Caroline, has invited me to live with her in Pietermaritzburg. I said I’d wait and see. Now I may as well accept.’

  Dallas nodded and moved towards the door. Caroline was welcome to her. ‘With your permission I will remove my belongings from here.’

  ‘You can take them now. They’re packed and ready.’

  Mock martyrdom didn’t suit her any more than false repentance, outrage or pathos.

  ‘One day, for your own sake, Sarah, I hope you discover the person you really are. I give up. I confess, you completely confuse me. Goodbye. Stay well.’

  She turned her face away.

  Dallas found his things in two suitcases under the stairs. He supposed she’d packed everything. They were easy to carry the short distance to Mrs Watson’s, where he put them into the carriage with their other possessions. Lorna stood in the doorway saying goodbye to the landlady. He joined them, took Cam from Lorna and placed him on his shoulders.

  The baby crowed with pleasure.

 
‘Are you ready to leave, my dear?’

  Lorna had been watching his face, trying to gauge how the meeting with Sarah had gone. She smiled, reassured. ‘Yes, darling.’

  ‘Then we’ll say goodbye, Mrs Watson. And thank you for everything.’ He caught a whiff of something and removed Cam from his shoulders. ‘I do believe our son has a present for you, my love.’ When he looked back the solid wooden door was slamming shut. Its ultimate impact rattled several windows. ‘Nice knowing you, Mrs Watson.’ He grinned at Lorna. ‘Let’s go. We have the rest of our lives to live.’

  Arm in arm they walked towards the carriage. ‘The news will be all over Durban within twenty-four hours,’ Lorna guessed.

  ‘I hate to contradict you, my darling, but try six.’

  ‘Who cares?’ Lorna flung off the hat she’d been wearing and shook out her lustrous blonde hair. The pale skin Dallas remembered had taken on a light tan since coming to Africa. It brought out the blue in her eyes.

  ‘Your eyes used to be grey,’ Dallas commented.

  ‘Must be a reflection of the sky,’ she said gaily. ‘I’ve never seen such a beautiful colour.’ Lorna hesitated. ‘How did it go?’

  ‘I have no idea.’

  She lifted an inquiring eyebrow.

  Dallas shrugged. ‘Honestly, I don’t know. She went through every emotion known to women and didn’t mean any of them. Will you promise me something?’

  ‘If I can.’

  ‘Be honest. If you’re cross, be cross. If you’re sad, cry. Happy, laugh. Sorry, apologise. Will you do that? And could you do something else? Put Cam on the other side. He stinks.’

  Lorna moved the baby, then slid closer to Dallas, kissing his cheek. ‘I promise to be honest but you’ll have to get used to the smell. Babies are like that.’

  Dallas rolled his eyes in mock horror.

  ‘Da,’ Cam said happily.

  ‘Hear that?’ Dallas grinned. ‘He said dada.’

  ‘Rubbish.’

  ‘Da.’

  ‘There. He said it again.’

  ‘That’s just babbling.’

  Dallas gave his best lordly look. ‘I do believe you’re jealous.’

  ‘Am not.’

  ‘Dada.’

  Lorna tickled then kissed their son. ‘Disloyal little brat.’

  Dallas wondered how a person as small as Cam could smell that bad. He was amazed that it didn’t seem to bother Lorna. Looking over at her, at the flawless skin, the fashionable clothes, the erect way she sat, she might have been any one of a dozen girls he knew back in Edinburgh. But she was exceptional in every respect and Dallas knew he was a very lucky man.

  ‘You’re staring.’

  ‘Have you eyes in the side of your head?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘Then how did you know?’

  ‘The carriage is nearly off the road.’

  Dallas would have been happy to relax and enjoy every moment of each day with Lorna and Cam but he had much to organise for the next trip. It was all very well for him to rough it but he couldn’t expect a woman and baby to do the same. An extra wagon would be needed, properly kitted out for comfort and privacy, provisions less basic. The list of baby requirements was astonishing.

  ‘He needs all that?’

  ‘Yes.’

  Her tone said she was not prepared to compromise. Dallas bought the lot.

  Although their domestic arrangement had tongues wagging, neither Lorna nor Dallas knew enough people to worry about whether they were being snubbed. As Lorna put it, ‘If you have a fist full of money to spend, it’s amazing how quickly shopkeepers fall over themselves to sell their wares.’ While reputations were one thing, Dallas was known as a man who paid his bills and due deference was shown to both him and Lorna. What was said behind their backs, they neither knew nor cared.

  Cam thrived under his father’s attention. ‘He needed a man in his life,’ Lorna said one night. ‘I suspect there’s more than a streak of stubbornness in him. As his mother, I usually give in. You make him put it to good use; I can see that when you play with him. If Cam doesn’t get his way, instead of crying, he approaches whatever it is from a different direction. Guess who wins every time?’

  Dallas looked skeptical. ‘Are you sure? He’s only a baby.’

  ‘A miniature combination of you and me, my love.’

  ‘Good grief! What have we done?’

  Lorna giggled. ‘Unless I’m mistaken, we’ve done it again. I’m two days late.’

  Dallas folded her close. ‘Mmmm!’ He nuzzled her neck. ‘Perhaps we should make sure.’

  She nodded solemnly. ‘I agree. One should always have a contingency plan.’

  Two days before they were due to leave, on his way into town, Dallas, reacting to nothing more than a spur-of-the-moment whim, took a different route and rode past Jette’s aunt’s house. He nearly fell off Tosca on seeing the beautiful Danish thief outside in the garden. He reined in and sat still, watching her. She was picking flowers.

  Jette must have sensed something because she straightened suddenly and turned to look. ‘Dallas!’ Her voice held pleasure, nothing more.

  ‘Jette.’

  She walked towards him, stopping just inside the gate. ‘How well you look.’

  He nodded curtly. ‘You too, madam. That’s a lovely brooch you are wearing.’

  Jette looked down briefly. ‘Isn’t it?’ Her gaze challenged his. ‘An admirer gave it to me.’

  ‘He must have admired you greatly.’

  ‘Oh, he did.’

  Dallas dismounted and walked closer. She watched him approach, a tiny, unreadable smile on her face.

  Dallas found no rancour in him. Her gaze held steady with his and, instead of anger, he felt curiosity. ‘Why did you do it?’ he asked quietly.

  There was no guilt on her face. ‘I’m a thief, what else was I to do?’

  ‘Our time together meant nothing?’ Inwardly, Dallas winced at his masculine need for reassurance. It was pathetic, he knew that.

  Jette’s smile grew. ‘The others on board offered slim pickings indeed. Mr Logan was obviously financially embarrassed. Soldiers and sailors have never been my style. And the wretched Mr Arnaud was a bore. You were young, good looking and secretive about your past. It intrigued me. I expected nothing more than a pleasant interlude and, I freely confess, found myself far from disappointed.’

  Dallas was only human, a fact he’d had reason to acknowledge in the past. The smile that spread across his face came quite spontaneously.

  Jette continued, her eyes sparkling with amusement at his reaction. ‘Having discovered the two pouches, I nearly left them. You were so ill my initial instinct was to take pity. Fortunately or not, I pride myself on professionalism.’

  ‘You have good reason,’ Dallas rejoined.

  She gave a tinkling laugh. ‘Touché. If it makes you feel better, I have occasionally entertained a guilty conscience about mixing business with pleasure.’ Jette shrugged. ‘It soon passes.’

  Her candour was appealing. ‘Do you have any of it left?’

  ‘All of it. Not due to any feelings of shame, I assure you. I’m a woman who loves beautiful things. But I’d have sold them in an instant if I’d been short of funds. Fortunately my finances improved dramatically in Morocco.’ She pouted slightly. ‘I suppose you want them back?’

  ‘They are family heirlooms, the only contact I have with my father.’

  ‘How touching! You’re introducing an element I find tedious – there is no place for emotion in my business.’

  ‘Very well. Like you, I need the money.’

  Jette laughed again, totally relaxed. ‘You are indeed fortunate, Dallas. For once, Lady Luck has chosen to favour me and I am no longer in the predicament I was. Take back what is rightfully yours. A small request, however. May I keep this brooch?’

  He smiled. He couldn’t help it. She was so brazen. ‘You’re right about one thing. I admired you greatly. Yes, keep the brooch.’

 
Jette clapped her hands. ‘Thank you, for I am exceedingly fond of it. Tether that fine horse and come inside.’

  He could hardly believe his good fortune. ‘I did consider asking your aunt if she knew where you might be.’

  ‘You met her?’

  ‘No. Logan gave me the address but I never took the matter further.’

  ‘I’m pleased you didn’t speak to her. She had no idea of my . . . ah, profession.’

  ‘That’s what stopped me. You say had?’

  ‘She died.’ No explanation, just the facts.

  ‘I’m sorry.’

  Jette shrugged that it didn’t matter. ‘I hardly knew her. She left me this house and a decent inheritance. My aunt was a widow and yours truly is her only living relative. Today I am quite comfortably off.’

  Dallas didn’t ask how. He could imagine it well enough. All he said was, ‘Sultans are known for their generosity.’

  Jette inclined her head, indicating that they were.

  ‘How did you get away?’

  ‘That was easy. I simply slipped out at night and disappeared into the darkness.’

  ‘You were lucky not to be caught. I understand that harems are closely guarded.’

  Jette frowned. ‘Is that what you think of me? Dallas! I thought you held me in some esteem. Obviously not.’

  ‘What else am I to think?’

  ‘That’s up to you. With lack of knowledge nothing is a foregone conclusion. Hasn’t life taught you that?’ She shook her head. ‘No matter. As to my escape, I did have some help.’

  ‘Another conquest?’

  ‘There you go again. I would not entrust my safety to a mere admirer. Their thinking is invariably muddled by emotion. I needed a cool head, local knowledge and greed.’ She grinned. ‘Commodities easily bought in Morocco.’ Abruptly, Jette changed the subject. ‘Wait here. I’ll be down in a moment.’

  Dallas looked around the room while he waited. He had no idea how long Jette had lived here but noticed no attempt to erase what was obviously her aunt’s taste in decoration. Perhaps she didn’t intend to stay; someone like Jette would quickly grow bored. Her willingness to return his possessions had come as a complete surprise. If she were to be believed, the decision to take his jewels had been almost casual. Did the same apply to giving them back? Or was it the risk of reprisal? He didn’t think so. Jette seemed to fear nothing.

 

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