Something started buzzing around in Adam’s head, like a mosquito in the dark. He couldn’t quite locate it to swat it and look at it fully. It was irritating him. Maybe if he waited, it could come back to him…
Stevie had taken a slow walk back to Adam. She had watched him find Danny in the crowd and take him off for a drink. It was instinctive, not the action of a man out to use a little boy to impress an ex or keep her onside. He had thrown back his head and laughed at something Danny had said and there had been real warmth there. She found herself smiling at him in thanks for being nice to her son. Coupled with the conversation she had just had with Pam, it occurred to her then that maybe she didn’t know the real Adam MacLean at all.
Pam bumped into Adam by the cheesecake. She was swaying quite a bit now.
‘Having a good time, Scotty?’ she asked.
‘I certainly am,’ he said. ‘Fabulous cheesecake–is it homemade?’
‘Of course, but not by me, by the baker on Lamb Sreet,’ and she let loose a laugh that could decimate a building. ‘So how are you and Stevie getting on?’
‘Great,’ said Adam.
‘Good girl, is Stevie.’
‘Aye,’ he said.
‘Be nice to think she was seeing someone who didn’t break her heart for a change. That bastard Mick…’ Pam shook her head in unmitigated disgust. ‘I don’t know how she held it all together really. Brilliant stuff she does. Have you read any yet? Then again, you’re a bloke so probably not. But for Matthew to go and do the same as Mick–to Stevie, of all people! She wouldn’t hurt a fly, Stevie. Never known a girl have as much bad luck with blokes!’
Adam pretended he knew what she was talking about and nodded.
‘He didn’t give her a penny–Mick, you know. Then he left her with all that shit to sort out. Stevie’s an absolute diamond, though, and I love her to bits. You look after her, Adam MacLean, or you’ll have us to answer to.’ She thumbed towards the crowd in the general direction of Matthew. ‘His loss, your gain, that’s what I say. I really like Matt, but he is being such a knobhead at the moment. In fact, I’m going to speak to him, right now. I’m going to tell him—’
‘Oh no, you’re not!’ said Will, appearing from the side and leading his wife masterfully off inside the house for some soft drinks and a cheese sarnie. Despite appearances, Will could handle Pam quite efficiently when he needed to.
And as Adam’s brain processed this new, albeit confusing, information, it occurred to him that maybe he didn’t know the real Stevie Honeywell at all.
For the remainder of the party the pretend lovebirds managed to give the perfect semblance of a truly together couple. They spent a fair bit of time apart with their separate groups of friends, but the clues were there in the times they sought each other out–in the small touches, the considerations which spoke far more than grandiose displays of snoggy-type affection. Then all too soon it was time for them to go home. Adam had been talking to Will and the gym guys, once again battling the merits of Well Life versus Gym Village, when he looked over and caught Matthew staring over at Stevie, who was chattering happily away to Catherine and a well-sobered-up Pam. It wasn’t the look of someone who had lost all his feelings for her, and Adam didn’t know why, but it annoyed him. He made his way over to Stevie, put his arm possessively around her and squeezed her, then bent his head to her to say that they were being observed. She felt for his hand and decided to put on a good show in that case. Stevie had never been one for holding hands, so she knew that if Matthew was watching this, it would strike a loud chord. Being swallowed up by Adam’s big meaty mitt, though, wasn’t anything like the rare slim-fingered Matthew-hand experience. Adam was stroking her knuckles with his thumb absently whilst they were talking to Catherine. It felt as intimate as a kiss, almost more so, and for that reason, she felt herself pulling away, just before Danny came along, yawning. She gave Catherine and Eddie and her host and hostess a goodbye hug, then they wended their way back to Adam’s car.
Danny was asleep as soon as he was buckled into the back seat and Stevie wasn’t far behind him. She hadn’t drunk much alcohol; the first glass of champagne had gone straight to her head and she didn’t trust her actions if her feelings were booze-distorted, so she’d mostly drunk tonic water. Still, she felt dizzy and exhilarated. She’d had such a lovely time and it had been more successful on the Matthew/Jo front than she could ever have thought possible. Jo had spent most of the evening trying not to look cross and Matthew just looked weary. His disgruntled face and Jo’s obviously snipey asides had added very much to the enjoyment of her evening, and if that made her a bitch, then so be it. She had caught Matthew staring over at them quite a few times, and once she thought he had been about to come over, until Jo had stopped him. What would he have said, she wondered.
And Adam had been…well, lovely actually. Even though he was faking the affection, it had been nice to imagine what it would be like to be wanted and touched and fussed over by someone who had her interests at heart. Matthew had liked to be touched and fussed over, but he rarely gave back the affection he expected. Every day, Stevie was becoming more aware of how much she had given out and how little she had received in return. It made her feel even more lonely and unwanted and stupid than she did already.
Adam drove in silence. The buzzing little mosquito had landed and he had swatted it in his head and examined it. It had been a very interesting little bug.
He carried Danny into the house for her, and deposited him gently on his bed. Stevie took off her son’s shoes and threw his cover over him. Then she asked Adam if he wanted a coffee and he said that he wouldn’t mind. She put a half-packet of ground beans through the percolator, then they went into the lounge and flumped down. Stevie reclined on the sofa and kicked off her sandals. Surprisingly, she had only been aware of her feet hurting since she had walked in through the door. She wiggled her toes and relaxed.
‘What sort of coffee is this then?’ asked Adam, taking a great big dreamy sniff.
‘Chocolate ice-cream. It’s nice iced, with a big blob of cream on the top.’
‘Sounds lovely.’
‘It is.’
They drank in a silence that was surprisingly companionable. For a while, she almost forgot she didn’t like him. However, that wasn’t to last.
‘You seem to like these books,’ he said, picking up a Beatrice Pollen Midnight Moon from a stack at the side of his chair. ‘I wouldn’t have thought someone like you might be into crappy romances like these.’
Had Stevie been a puffer fish, she would have swollen up to twenty times her normal size then and grown spikes.
‘Yes, but you don’t know me at all to judge me, do you?’
Adam couldn’t believe she had snapped at him. He had actually meant what he said as a compliment!
‘No,’ he said, thinking back to his conversation with Pam, ‘you’re right, I don’t. But I think I might get to know you quite a bit better soon.’
‘Oh, do you really think so?’ drawled Stevie, as all thoughts of goodwill towards him disappeared in a puff of smoke. Cocky git! The party was over, so was the pretence, and now he was back to being the local Loss Ness Monster representative.
‘Yes, I think we need to capitalize on the impact we’ve made tonight.’ He calmly sipped from his cup in stark contrast to Stevie, whose eyebrows appeared to be doing a tango.
‘Meaning?’
‘Meaning, it’s working so we have to give it our all.’
‘So, Mr MacLean, how exactly do you propose to do that?’
‘Easy, Miss Honeywell. Tomorrow I’m moving in with you.’
Chapter 39
‘Well, that was another great evening!’ Jo grumbled, throwing her clutch purse down on the sofa and ripping off her shoes. ‘I can’t believe Adam would even think about going out with her. Obviously, he’s doing it out of spite. What does he think he’s bloody trying to prove? I mean, as if I’d be jealous of a fucking ugly fucking dwarf!’
‘You think he’s trying to actually do that? Make you jealous?’ said Matthew, wincing at her foul expletives. Not even Jo with her posh accent could make them sound acceptable to him.
‘What else? He can’t actually like her, can he? He’s obviously using her and the stupid bitch can’t see it.’
‘Don’t be cruel,’ said Matthew with a weary huff. ‘Stevie hasn’t done anything wrong. She’s a good person.’
‘She can’t be that great if you left her at a minute’s notice,’ sneered Jo waspishly.
‘I didn’t leave her because she was horrible,’ said Matthew, but quietly because Jo was being quite scary and her comment hit his conscience in the bull’s eye.
‘You’re standing up for her?’ Jo looked at him with an expression so twisted it made her sweet face look quite ugly.
Matthew decided not to say that he was worried to death about Stevie and would have to step in soon to stop her from making the biggest mistake of her life. He knew it would cause this row to get even bigger and he was too tired, physically and emotionally, for that tonight. His head felt heavy and mixed-up and fit to burst. It was as if Jo was two different people sometimes and he was seeing less of the sweet, lovely one every day.
‘All I’m saying is that she didn’t deserve what she got from us and does anyone deserve to be a punchbag for him?’
‘Oh, don’t be stupid! Adam wouldn’t—’ Jo snapped off what she was going to say and flew into a different fury instead. ‘How dare he? With her! How long has it been going on, that’s what I’d like to know.’
‘Does it matter?’
‘Yes, of course it matters! No one is unfaithful to me. No one!’
She thought once again of how easily Stevie had let Matthew go. And she thought of how undramatic the scene had been when she had told Adam she was leaving. He had listened without saying a word and made no attempt to follow her when she went upstairs to pack her cases. He had even carried them downstairs for her and put them in the car. She saw that sadness was heavy in his eyes, but he still had done nothing to stop her going. In the car, she had pressed her nails into her arm in frustration and anger, hardly feeling the pain. How dare he let her go so easily? She had despised him as weak at the time but now she was sure this was all part of some greater plan, and it excited her. No one had ever let Jo go without a fight.
‘Jo, please explain to me why exactly would you be cross that Stevie and Adam have got together? How can you be bothered, after all he put you through?’
Jo’s mouth opened and then shut tight again. Then she started up the stairs, saying, ‘I’m going to bed, Matthew. Come if you want.’
As he heard the bedroom door open, Matthew knew that her back would be waiting for him in bed and tonight, for the first time, he really didn’t care.
In his cold, echoey, four-bedroomed house that night, Adam started to pack a suitcase. It was young Danny who had reminded him that there were only two bedrooms in that house–something that Finch would know. If he moved in, Finch would presume the obvious–Danny in one bed, he and Stevie in the other. Their plan was working better than he could ever have expected it to. He had seen how many times Matthew’s eyes had drifted over to Stevie at the barbecue. As for Jo, she was hurting; Adam was definitely getting to her. He could tell that by the way she sneered at him through the happy, party crowd, as if she was enjoying the thought that he might be suffering. Like a wasp, Jo stung to kill when she was threatened. Then he had witnessed how she’d treated the boy. It had altered everything, seeing Danny try to cuddle her and Jo shove him off as if he was something abhorrent. Something about the events of that night had shifted all the pieces around in his heart.
Then he thought of how slowly Stevie’s head had turned towards him when he had made the suggestion that he move in with her to Humbleby. He didn’t think it was possible for anyone’s eyes to open that wide without popping out and detaching from their optical nerves. It was all he could do not to burst out laughing, but he feared she would have whacked him with the nearest Midnight Moon rubbish.
‘One last big push and I swear to you that if they haven’t broken up in seven days, I’ll move out again. But I promise you they will have.’
‘Of course you’re joking!’ said Stevie breathlessly.
‘Naw,’ said Adam. ‘I’ve never been more serious in my whole life.’
It was obviously against her better judgment but she had soundlessly and slowly nodded her assent and continued drinking her coffee. Who would have thought they would ever have had to resort to these measures?
Chapter 40
At 15 Blossom Lane, the next day was a very strained affair. Matthew made Jo an early breakfast in bed as a peace-offering, although he wasn’t quite sure what he was apologizing for. He went out for a huge stack of Sunday newspapers and settled himself on the dining-room table as Jo went back to sleep. Was it his imagination or were there more debt articles than ever in the supplements? How to manage your money? Should I get a consolidating loan? How to stop spending…
His bowels started to cramp up as he read. He really could not afford, in all senses of the word, to delay the money talk with Jo any longer, so he wished she would hurry and wake up. She was still asleep when he called up at lunchtime, so he slunk back downstairs and reached for another newspaper with only a bacon sandwich and a bag of Cheesy Wotsits for company.
He heard signs of her rising just after four and waited patiently, chewing his nails, whilst sounds of the fully-turned-on bath taps filtered downstairs. He was almost physically deformed with anxiety by the time she came downstairs, an hour later. His heart sank as he saw she was dressed to go out.
‘Are we going out for something to eat?’ were her first words to him.
‘Now–say it now!’ urged a voice in Matthew’s head.
‘Er…Jo.’ He took her hands and pulled her softly down on the sofa. ‘I can’t. I’m a bit broke at the moment. I’m sorry.’ There, that was easy enough!
‘Broke?’ She looked confused. ‘What do you mean, “broke”?’
Matthew took the sort of breath one did before a bungee jump off the Grand Canyon.
‘The thing is, for a while…it would help if you could give me something towards the household bills–you know, the mortgage and…stuff.’
She stared at him as if he had just grown a pair of horns. Then she stood abruptly up. ‘You are fucking joking, I take it. Now, like I say, are we going out or do I pack a bag and leave now?’
‘We’ll go out,’ he said.
‘I’ll get my shoes,’ she said.
Oh bollocks.
As Matthew was dreaming that night of a big Visa card with Colin Seed’s cardigan on chasing him around work, Adam’s car was pulling quietly up outside Humbleby Cottage. Danny was asleep in the big bed that his mum would share with him for the next seven nights. Stevie would have preferred to stay in the back room, but the front bedroom had a lock on the door.
‘Hi,’ she greeted Adam nervously.
‘Hi,’ said Adam, bringing in a suitcase and a sports bag, which he dumped by the door.
‘I’ve put you in my room,’ said Stevie a little awkwardly. He raised his dark red eyebrows and she bristled in response. ‘I will, of course, be sharing with Danny. I’ve told him you’re having some decorators in and are just lodging here for a while.’
‘Fine,’ said Adam. ‘I’ll no’ confuse the boy.’
‘Good,’ said Stevie.
‘I’d have taken the sofa. You didn’t have to move out for me.’
‘I fell asleep on the sofa once after working late. Trust me, it’s not at all comfortable even for someone my size, so…’
‘You never said what it is that you actually dae for work?’
‘Anyway, if you take your case up I’ll put some coffee on,’ said Stevie, ignoring him.
‘I’ll take that as an “I’m no’ telling you, so bugger aff”.’
‘That’s it in a nutshell, Mr MacLean. You know where your room is,
of course.’
He laughed. ‘Yes, ma’am,’ he said, and saluted and obeyed.
The room smelled of something sweet like wild strawberries swirled in with the perfume she wore. He had noticed it on her at the barbecue–light and floral and violety–so unlike the heady, exotic, spicy scents that Jo preferred. Stevie had put fresh linen on the bed; lovely cool cotton sheets. She had left big white fluffy towels folded neatly on top of the duvet and she had cleared some wardrobe and drawer space for him too. This was not a woman who lounged about all day watching TV through a layer of dust, he thought, and wondered again what it was exactly that she did do all day then. He could have asked Will but he didn’t want to cheat. He wanted to crack her secret himself. It amused him to puzzle on it.
He came down to the beautiful smell of coffee hissing and spitting in angry protest through the percolator.
‘What sort is that one?’ he asked, ‘It smells divine.’
‘Crème caramel,’ she said. ‘Have you eaten?’
‘Don’t worry yoursel’.’
‘We had a big chicken for lunch. There’s plenty left, if you want a sandwich.’
‘Thanks, I might just do tha—’
‘I thought you might,’ she said, putting down a substantial plate of sandwiches in front of him, garnished with crisps and salady bits. ‘You don’t look like the sort of bloke who says no to food.’
‘Not unless you baked the bread yourself,’ he said.
‘No, you’re safe. It’s from Morrison’s.’
And then they watched a late-night murder mystery and munched chicken sandwiches and chocolate digestives until bedtime, like an old married couple who warred a lot.
Chapter 41
The first thing Matthew noticed as he opened the curtains the next morning was Adam MacLean’s car outside Stevie’s cottage, and it didn’t take an idiot to work out that he had been there all night. He presumed that’s why Jo was extra-agitated and stomping and crashing about and in a generally foul mood. They both knew there were only two bedrooms to that house. Neither of them said a word about it but it was obviously on their minds, and they were both cross that it was on the other’s mind, none of which helped to lift the mood of a day that had already been spoilt by 7.30 a.m.
The Birds and the Bees Page 25