by Olivia Arran
She stayed silent, searching my face. For what? I didn’t know. I only knew I had to give her whatever it was that she needed to say yes.
Swallowing back all the words I wanted to say, I forced myself to play my final card. “You could stay … for your sister.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Leona
Be my mate… The words I had longed to hear. Well, kind of. He wasn’t exactly declaring that I was the only one for him, the one he was choosing the spend the rest of his life with. No, he was offering me a way out.
“No.” It was a tiny word, but it carried a punch that had him flinching. There was nothing I wanted more in this world than to spend my life with him, but only if he was willing to try and love me back.
I turned my attention back to the Mayor. “Can you arrange it?”
“I’ll rip your fucking balls off,” Austin growled, taking a menacing step toward him. Placing himself between myself and Carter, his eyes pleaded with me.
I made the ultimate mistake: I touched him, my fingers curling around his bicep and digging in. Electricity shot through my arm, spreading out through me in a lapping wave of heat. How did he do this to me? What gave him the right to make me feel like this? I let go. “You don’t need to do this.” Even to my ears I sounded unsure. Weak.
He stared at me like I’d sprouted wings and turned a funny shade of pink. “I don’t need to do this? Sweetheart, if you won’t agree to be my mate then you sure as hell don’t have a say in what I can and can’t do.”
“You say that as if it’s something you really want,” I muttered, looking anywhere but at him, “And not something you feel obliged to do. I get it, Austin, you’re a good guy. The best. But self sacrifice isn’t a good look.”
“Self sacrifice?” His voice was low. Insistent. “Is that really what you think this is?”
“Why else would you offer to take me as your mate?” There. I’d said it. Made a complete fool of myself. I glued my eyes to the floor, refusing to witness the pity in his eyes. Or, worse, the compassion.
“Because I love you.”
His words echoed in my ears. I dragged in a deep breath, air rattling in through my throat and out through my nose, the sound deafening in the silence of the room. Everything had paused while my mind struggled to comprehend. He loved me?
“Say something, sweetheart…” he whispered in a strained voice.
I risked a glance and I was lost, drowning in his stormy blue eyes. “I— I thought— You— I didn’t—” He loved me?
He moved closer.
I tilted my head back, still held captive by the emotions flitting across his face. He wasn’t smiling. Wasn’t blinking. He was waiting.
For me.
He wanted me to be his mate because he loved me. My hand hovered over his arm, my fingers cautiously feathering across the back of his hand. “Why didn’t you say something?”
“Because none of it mattered if you didn’t love me back.”
“And if I didn’t?”
His expression didn’t change, but his words did little to mask his pain. “Then I’d still love you.”
“You’d still offer to make me your mate? So I could stay?”
He stiffened, as if bracing himself. “Yes.”
“But I’m human.” A part of your past.
“And I love you for it, because of it, despite it. Why would it matter? You’re perfect to me,” he ground out.
“I’m sorry—”
“Dammit, Leona!” He grabbed my hand, twisting his fingers into mine and tugging me closer. “We could be good together. I’d look after you and do everything in my power to make you happy. We fit together, can’t you feel it?”
My chest bumped against his torso. Reaching up, I cupped his chin, scraping my thumbnail against the permanent scruff that dusted his jaw. “I know.”
His growl vibrated out through his chest. “Then—”
“I’m sorry to disappoint you, because—” sliding my hand from his jaw, I covered his mouth before he could cut in, “—I love you, too.” I could only see the top of his face, but felt his mouth drop open under my hand. I slid my hand away with a shy smile.
“When?” His shock had faded to be replaced by something that looked a little like wonder. Sliding his hand around my waist, he brought our joined hands up to rest between our bodies.
“I’m not sure when it happened. One day I didn’t, then the next, I did.” He had slid into my heart with his kindness and honor. Oh, and the fact that he was out of this world sexy. “I didn’t believe it could happen,” I murmured. At his cocked eyebrow, I continued, “Love at first sight. I thought it was the thing of movies and fairy tales. I mean, how could two people meet and fall in love, just like that?”
“When two people are perfect for each other, they know. The universe aligns and everything clicks into place.”
“You’re a romantic!”
He chuckled, pulling me even closer until our bodies were joined from toe to chest. “Don’t tell anyone; it’ll ruin my tough guy reputation.”
I tried to peek around him, but he was too wide and holding me too tight. “What about Mayor Carter?” I hissed as low as I could.
“He left a little while ago, snuck out while we were arguing and just before we claimed each other.”
“Oh!” I really had been distracted. Claimed… My stomach was performing cartwheels. He wanted me as much as I wanted him. “We were idiots, weren’t we?”
“Just two people trying to make the other one happy. Though I’m left wondering why you wouldn’t let me in your hotel room the other night, what had I done wrong?”
I winced, shaking my head. “I listened to someone who I shouldn’t have.” I explained what had happened that day at the cafe, describing the group of women and their advice. “So, you see, I got it into my head that I couldn’t possibly be the woman for you.”
“Because I didn’t drag you into my bed and bite you?” The corner of his mouth was twitching, but at least he had the decency not to laugh in my face.
“Well, you kind of did drag me into your bed…” I reminded him.
A bark of laughter escaped, the twitch sliding up into a full-fledged grin. “So I did.” His hand slid down to my ass, fingers spreading out and digging in. “Want to let me do it again?”
I pretended to think about it.
He moved his thigh between my legs, lowering his head until his mouth hovered over my ear. His tongue darted out, tracing the edge of my earlobe. “I’ll make it worth your while, sweetheart,” he growled soft and low.
“It depends,” I gasped out as he gently bit down, his other hand sliding around my back and up through my hair.
“On what?” His mouth moved across my cheek, skirting the corner of my mouth to nibble at my jaw.
My head tilted back at his silent command, exposing my throat. “On whether there’s biting involved.” The thick outline of his shaft dug into my stomach as he moved against me, dragging a moan from my throat.
“You’ve said yes, sweetheart. I guarantee there’s going to be biting. I’m going to mark you so every shifter here knows you’re my mate and off limits.” There was no mistaking the anticipation in his voice, nor the satisfaction that glowed in his eyes as they melted from blue to icy silver.
“When?” It came out on a breathy gasp, his mouth coming down on mine and swallowing the word as his lips slid over mine, demanding my full attention. I reveled in his taste, stroking his tongue with my own as I clung to him, my hands sliding around and fingers digging into the hard muscles of his back. “I mean, is it right away or will we wait?” I knew what I wanted, but I still wasn’t sure exactly how this worked.
He broke away, a low rumble vibrating up through his chest. “Soon. Why?” His eyes took on a devilish glint. “Do you still need a little—” he broke off, backing me up against the wall and caging me in his arms, “—convincing?”
It was on the tip of my tongue to say no, then he dropped to hi
s knees, crouching between my legs as his hand slid up my thighs and rucked up my dress. Oh. Oh! “That sounds…” My head fell back against the wall as his finger brushed against my core, words failing me. I squeezed my eyes shut, my hands dancing in the air and eventually coming down to slide through his hair.
Hooking my panties to one side, he brushed a finger through my warmth, teasing my entrance before pushing inside.
Air exploded from me, my knees threatening to buckle. We had only been together one night, but already my body knew what to expect. Knew how to react to his touch.
Hair tickled my thighs and I snuck a quick peek. The sight of his dark head nestled between my thighs looked so wicked and naughty, the vision had shivers rippling up and down my spine in delicious waves.
Molten hot wetness stroked into my core, probing deep as his finger thrust inside me, swirling and teasing and plunging relentlessly.
Okay. Yes. I needed convincing. Very much so. Oh … sweet heaven. My fingers curled into his scalp, digging in as he licked and stroked, exploring every inch of me over and over again. Sucking and tasting until I trembled on legs ready to collapse, my back arching and thighs clenching, trembling waves washing over me again and again, a throbbing pulse beating between my legs. Ready to explode. Teetering. His finger pushed deeper, harder, as he sucked and licked and—
My moan morphed into a cry as my hips jerked in his hands, pressing myself against his mouth as my orgasm crashed through me. A final whimper and my legs buckled.
He caught me, holding me up. Coming up off his knees, he brushed back my hair and tucked it behind my ear. “Any time you need convincing, just ask,” he murmured, “I’ll always be happy to remind you exactly why you said yes.”
Any time… Things like this didn’t happen; they just didn’t. Men like him didn’t exist.
My face must have shown my astonishment, because he smirked, “Better get used to it, sweetheart, because I love the way you taste and I have a large appetite.”
I didn’t have an answer for that, but the hard length poking my stomach? Now, that I did have an answer for. I brushed against him, sliding my hand down his stomach.
He caught my wrist with a strained chuckle. “I refuse to claim you in Carter’s office.”
I pouted. I knew I looked ridiculous, but I couldn’t help it. “Where?”
“Our bed. In our home.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Austin
My—our—cabin was only feet away when I pulled her to a stop, wrapping my arms around her and stealing a kiss. She hadn’t flinched away from me, but she still didn’t know everything that I’d done. Even though I was still reeling over the fact that she’d said yes, that she loved me, I knew that to start our relationship on half truths and a hidden past wasn’t right. She needed to know the man I was before she fully accepted me as her mate. I broke off the kiss, not bothering to hide my chuckle when her lips chased mine, not ready to let go. “There’s something I have to tell you,” I chided, giving in on a groan and meeting her lips with mine.
“What is it? Can it wait?” Her eyes were bright and her cheeks still flushed from her orgasm, she was so beautiful it hurt.
“After I’d been bitten I didn’t know what I was.” I swallowed past the lump in my throat, remembering those years of roaming wild, living more as bear than man. Never knowing what the next day would bring. “I was a rogue, though it wasn’t called that back then. I did things that I’m not proud of.”
She stilled, her eyes clearing and gaze steady. “We’ve all done a lot of things we’re not proud of, it’s what we do now that counts. You’re a good man, Austin.”
“I hurt people. I didn’t mean to; I didn’t know how to deal with it all.”
“Who? What people?”
“People that got too close. It takes time for us to bond and learn control of the change. Right at the beginning, after I’d healed enough to change for the first time, but before I’d learned control, I woke up naked in a field with only memories of the night.” It still haunted me now, that I couldn’t control it.
She frowned and my heart sank. I shouldn’t have told her, but how could I not?
“Did these people attack you?”
“Humans. They were humans and I don’t know for sure.”
I must have done a shit job at hiding my uncertainty, because her frown switched to a glare. “Quit hedging and tell me the truth. Did you believe that these people were trying to hurt you?”
“Maybe.” That earned me a smack to the chest. I faked a wince. “Okay! They knew what I was, they’d been watching me.” Hunting me…
“And what did your bear think?”
I shrugged. “It’s more feelings and emotions, but I know he felt threatened.”
“How long ago after your attack was this?” she asked in a calm voice.
“A couple of weeks, maybe less.”
“And you were dying for a week, right?”
Damn, she really had been listening when I’d spewed all my secrets. “Yup. Good for nothing.”
“Harper has been under observation for a week. How long do you think it’ll take her to gain full control and be okay on her own?” She didn’t wait for my answer, ploughing ahead, “And she’s had the full support of a team of Alphas, plus her own personal Guardian—”
I narrowed my eyes, wondering how she’d come across that particular piece of information, but she waved me off.
“—And she wasn’t ripped open. A little bite, that’s all she had to recover from.”
A little bite? “It’s a little more complicated than that—”
She folded her arms, her elbows digging into my stomach. “Oh, so it’s as bad as having your throat torn out?” She didn’t bother to hide her sarcasm.
“It’s—”
“What did they do to you?” Her tone brooked no argument.
I forced the words out, speaking the nightmare out loud for the first time. “They shot me in the leg. It forced the change.”
“And you don’t think that’s attacking you?”
“I hurt them. Really hurt them, sweetheart.” I smoothed my hands over her arms, half afraid that she’d walk off in disgust any second now.
“Did you kill them? Because I would have.”
“No.”
“So, they’re shifters now, then?”
“I don’t know.” And that’s what haunted me. These men could have been changed because of me, or they could have died from their wounds, but I didn’t know. I’d woken in a field miles away and when I’d returned, there was no sign of them. Either I’d gotten the wrong place or someone had found them. Back then, as a man I didn’t know how to track by scent. I’d been useless.
“It’s not your fault and certainly not your responsibility.”
“They could be looking for me, to kill me for what I did.” They should be; vengeance was something I understood all too well.
“Are you going to spend your life looking over your shoulder? Stuck in the past?” She stretched up onto her tiptoes and placed her hands on either side of my head, dragging it down a fraction until we were eye to eye. “I was happy in my life, happy with the boring days where nothing happened and the most exciting thing was saving a client some money in taxes. I didn’t go out, didn’t have a social life, but I was okay with it. I loved curling up on the couch with a bowl of cereal and a good book, heck, no way you’re going to stop me from carrying on doing that, but you know what?”
I shook my head between her hands.
“I was waiting. Stuck in a space where my life had started but I wasn’t ready to get on with it yet. I didn’t know what I wanted and was too afraid to go out there and find out. Then I met you. Men like you don’t happen to a girl like me. But you say you love me. Me. And who am I to argue?” She paused, then I realized she was done.
“Uh, thanks?”
She grinned, popping a kiss on my lips. “Silly oaf. You’d better get used to not understanding every word that co
mes out of my mouth, it’s a woman’s prerogative to remain mysterious. What I’m saying is that everyone regrets something, but you can’t change the past. You’ve got to let go and make new memories until the old ones fade enough that they don’t hold any power over you.”
Astonishment and awe swelled up inside of me, truth ringing in her words and pushing back the shadows that I had let rule my life for so long. She was right. It was time to let go of the ghosts. “New memories?” I growled, snagging her around the waist and swinging her up into my arms. “Like this?” I buried my face in her neck, nipping at her skin, her squeals threatening to burst my sensitive ear drums. But I didn’t care. She was still with me after hearing everything. “Mine,” I whispered against her skin, carrying her toward the cabin that would be our home.
Her arms snaked around my neck, tugging my face down to meet hers in a heated kiss that had me stumbling up the steps, my back knocking into the front door of our cabin. I jammed the handle with my elbow, shoving it open. Parting her lips with my tongue, I groaned against her mouth, drowning in her taste as I fumbled my way through the room, unable to tear myself away for a moment. Cradling her protectively against walls that leaped out to attack me, her nails dug into my scalp as she nipped at my bottom lip, her breath hot and heavy.
We slammed through the bedroom door, collapsing onto the bed. I rolled, tugging her on top of me so she straddled my thighs. “Thank fuck,” I growled, tugging her hips down as I thrust up against her. I was so fucking hard, it hurt. I could still taste her on my tongue, her sweet release as she came apart above me, thighs trembling and nails clawing my scalp. More…
Before she had a chance to protest, I lifted her until she straddled my face.
“Austin—”
My growl as I tugged away her panties and licked straight into her core was her answer. More… A tug and her panties were history. Holding her tight, I sucked and licked, encouraging her to rock back and forth, to use my tongue as her own personal goddamned vibrator. Circling her clit, I rubbed and teased, licking in long, wet strokes and sliding my finger inside. She clenched, her body writhing above me and knees gripping my head in a vice, her cries echoing around the room with wild abandon.