by Parker Blue
“Sharra, heal his wound first,” Gwen said decisively. “We’ll replace the blood afterward. Vincent, if you could get everything ready?”
Thank goodness someone took charge.
“Of course,” Vincent said, and Shade heard a door shut on the far side of the room.
HURRY, Princess urged.
“Okay,” Sharra said. “Let’s do this.”
Sharra knelt beside him, and Elspeth sat beside the couch on the floor. Princess laid with her nose on his leg, as if she could help him by her sheer presence.
“What do you need me to do?” Elspeth asked, putting her hand on Sharra’s arm.
His sister looked frozen in indecision. He didn’t have the strength to deal with this and was losing more with each moment that passed.
DO SOMETHING, Princess insisted, sounding frantic.
Fang’s fuzzy face appeared in his vision. The hellhound looked intense. TELL ME WHAT TO TELL HER.
Gratefully, Shade closed his eyes and let the thoughts of what needed to be done fill his head.
SHARRA, PUT ONE HAND ON SHADE’S NECK AND THE OTHER ON ELSPETH’S, Fang directed.
Shade felt Sharra’s cool hand on his neck.
NOW, FIND THE HEALING DIMENSION.
“I don’t know where that is,” Sharra said, sounding frantic.
YES, YOU DO, Fang said, continuing to relay Shade’s thoughts. YOUR FATHER SHOWED IT TO YOU. REMEMBER, THE ONE YOU GUYS SAID FEELS PINK AND FLUFFY?
Then, privately to Shade, REALLY, DUDE? HOW CAN SOMETHING FEEL PINK?
It just does, Shade thought defensively. Sharra will understand.
“Oh, okay,” Sharra said.
“I’ve been through this before,” Val said. “You need to draw healing energies from that dimension.”
“I’m trying,” Sharra snapped.
TRY HARDER, Princess insisted.
LEAVE SHARRA ALONE, Fang told them all. DON’T DISTRACT HER—UNLESS YOU WANT SHADE TO DIE.
Luckily, that shut them all up.
Then, slowly, Shade felt the familiar ebb and flow. The healing energies swept through Elspeth, then Shade, then back again. Undulating like a wave, consistent as a metronome, it grew stronger and more powerful with each sweep.
But . . . the energies felt strange, wrong in some indefinable way. Was it because he was used to being on the other side? Maybe.
No, wait. His neck felt dead somehow. It wasn’t supposed to do that, was it? Suddenly, a blast of memories assaulted him. Elspeth’s, his own, a myriad of other people whose memories she’d eaten. Thoughts, feelings, snatches of sight and sound . . . they slammed into him, painfully ravaging his psyche.
Dear Lord, this was worse than the memory cascade. He stiffened against the onslaught and almost passed out.
STOP, Fang yelled.
Shade felt the energies pause as Sharra faltered.
“Why?” Val demanded. “What’s wrong?”
THIS ISN’T RIGHT. SOMETHING’S WRONG.
I can handle the pain, Shade assured him. It’s part of the healing process.
BUT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO FEEL IT IN YOUR BODY, NOT YOUR MIND. I KNOW—I’VE WATCHED THIS BEFORE, REMEMBER? THIS IS WRONG.
“How?” Val demanded.
HIS NECK SHOULD FEEL PAIN, HEALING, GROWTH, NOT LIKE A DEAD PART OF HIM.
“Your neck feels dead?” Val repeated in disbelief.
Elspeth jerked away from Sharra’s hand. “We must stop. It appears that a vampire’s tissues are incompatible with a demon’s.” Her skeletal hand closed on Shade’s arm. “You must allow Val to act as template.”
No. Someone else from the blood bank? he suggested to Fang. Or maybe Micah could get someone here from the Demon Underground.
Fang repeated what he said.
“No,” Sharra said. “No time. It must be Val.”
“About time,” Val muttered, and knelt next to the couch where Shade lay, offering Sharra her neck. “Let’s heal him.”
Crap. He didn’t want to do this.
WOULD YOU RATHER DIE? Fang asked belligerently.
Maybe.
NO, Princess said. YOU DON’T MEAN THAT.
Okay, maybe he didn’t. But he didn’t look forward to it either.
Without asking for his consent, Sharra resumed the healing with Val as template, far more confident this time. Shade winced as the healing energies swept through him, but had to acknowledge this felt more like he expected. His neck no longer felt dead—it felt alive, too much so. Excruciating pain, physical instead of mental, filled him as damaged tissues began to heal. He gave himself to the pain, hoping it would overpower the feelings and memories.
No such luck. It was like trying not to think about blue polka dots. The more you tried, the more round blue balls appeared in your mind.
And so Val experienced everything he’d felt about her. Crap.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Val
“IT’S WORKING,” Sharra said with a gasp.
Good. The now-familiar sensations swept through me. Soon, Shade and I would feel each other’s emotions, live each other’s memories. Some part of me wanted it, wanted to know how he really felt about me. But another part of me dreaded it, too. Because maybe I didn’t want to know . . . and I sure as heck didn’t want him knowing how I felt about him.
But I gritted my teeth against the pain, knowing it had to be much worse for him. I relived the agony of his mother’s abandonment, his father’s suicide, and his sister blaming him for the events that were not his fault. I didn’t realize how deeply he felt, how passionately he cared about people, and how much it devastated him when they betrayed him, person after person after person. Including me.
He relived my leaving him with that slut, Dina. His hurt that someone else had left him, the closing off of his feelings, and holding back so he wouldn’t be hurt again. The sheer pain of it made me reel, wishing I could take back everything I had ever done to make him feel this way, wanting to assure him he was loved by Sharra, by Princess, by the whole freakin’ Demon Underground. And, of course, by me.
Princess’s love resonated through him. In his mind, hers was the only true, undemanding love in his life. It broke my heart.
That knowledge swept through him as well, and to my embarrassment, he experienced every emotion I’d ever had about him. Every heartfelt, humiliating, drooling episode. Desperately, I tried to stop the gushing flow of emotion, but the healing process laid my soul bare. I wanted to pull away, hide my schoolgirlish crush that couldn’t stand up to Princess’s standards, but I couldn’t until Shade was healed.
And I realized that Shade felt guilty for me losing my strength. Damn it. He thought he was bad for me, when clearly, I was bad for him. Humiliating.
At the height of my embarrassment, the final healing started. He closed his eyes as the agonizing pain hit him, and all emotion and thought ceased except for the crashing, swelling pain as tissues healed, the wound closed, and tendons knit back together. Shade’s suffering continued nonstop until Sharra was finally satisfied.
Then, she let go, and Shade slumped back to the couch, unconscious.
“It worked,” Elspeth said in wonder as she stroked the scars on his neck. They looked as though they had been formed a month ago.
Strangely, I didn’t feel as wiped out as I had when I’d been Dan’s template. Maybe because the strength spell was still in place. I nodded. “There are some benefits to having a shadow demon around.”
HE IS WELL, Princess said, sounding relieved and satisfied. She licked his face, then Sharra’s hand and said, THANK YOU. And with that, she returned to her puppies, who were crying out for her in the other room.
Of all of us, Princess was the only purely unselfish love he’d ever experienced. Yes, Princess. It b
oggled the mind.
WHEN SHE LOVES, SHE LOVES WITH HER WHOLE HEART, Fang agreed.
Gwen and Vincent came back in then. “We’re ready for him downstairs,” she said.
“Good,” Alejandro said. And he leaned down to pick Shade up as if the shadow demon weighed nothing.
“Boss, please,” Vincent said, looking horrified that the leader of the New Blood Movement had actually stooped to help a demon. “I can do that.”
“And so can I,” Alejandro said calmly, his long hair sweeping into his face. “If you wouldn’t mind opening the way?”
“Of course,” Vincent said.
Princess stayed upstairs with the puppies, but ordered Fang to keep an eye on her human. So, the rest of us trooped downstairs, following the leader of the New Blood Movement who carried Shade as if he were light as a pillow.
Vincent hurried to open the doors and operate the elevators. Once we were downstairs, Vincent hesitated. “Should they really be in here?” he asked, glancing at Sharra and me.
“They are our allies,” Alejandro said, frowning.
Vincent looked taken aback, but he couldn’t argue with his boss. Instead, he opened the door and hurried ahead to show Alejandro where to put Shade. Strange, it looked a lot like the hospital rooms I’d seen on TV. Why did he think we shouldn’t see that?
Alejandro laid Shade gently down on the bed. He was already barefoot, which made him look even more vulnerable. Vincent and Gwen busied themselves with IV poles and plasma to get good, whole blood into him.
Gwen glanced up. “We have this now. Maybe you could leave us to it?”
A polite way to say, “Get the heck out, you’re bugging me.”
“Of course,” Alejandro said smoothly. He gestured us to enter the room next door, which looked like the one we’d just left.
Sharra, Austin, Elspeth and I followed him inside. Sharra accidentally bumped into Austin, whose face was an unaccustomed stone-like mask.
When she saw who it was, she shrieked, “Get him out of here.”
“Calm down,” I said, unwilling to put up with her hysterics. “Austin was being controlled by Emmanuel. It could have happened to any one of us who was there. It just happens that he was the one who was caught.”
“No,” Sharra said, shaking her head vehemently. “It’s just an excuse. He hates Shade.”
“No, he doesn’t,” I protested.
But Austin stayed rigid and unyielding, not even backing me up. I glared at him, wishing he could read my mind right now so I could tell him to reassure Shade’s sister.
Alejandro glanced at Austin. “Perhaps as proof, you could show us the injection site?”
His mouth hard, Austin nodded and unbuckled his belt.
My face heated. I really didn’t want to watch as Austin dropped trou. “That’s not necessary,” I protested.
For once, Austin didn’t tease me. He just turned his back, unbuttoned his jeans, and used his thumb to yank down his pants about six inches, exposing a good portion of his butt.
Sharra looked appalled at the sight of tight male buns, and I wasn’t about to move any closer.
COWARD, Fang said privately.
Yep. And I wasn’t too proud to admit it.
BUT YOU WANNA TAKE A PEEK, DON’T YOU?
My face warmed even more. Shut up.
Elspeth was the only one brave enough to check out his ass. Peering at his exposed skin, she said, “There is indeed a recent injection site here.”
Alejandro nodded. “As I suspected. They ‘made us,’ as Ms. Shapiro said earlier and took advantage of our being separated.”
“How?” Sharra asked.
“Obviously they caught him by surprise from behind,” I said. Injection site in buttocks, no duh?
“No,” Sharra said. “I mean, how did they know who you were?”
Relieved that Austin had yanked up his jeans and was now rezipping them, I said. “I’m not sure, but they had one person there who didn’t fit the profile of the Penitente followers. He was talking into a mic, probably in Emmanuel’s ear.” I described the tan, bald man with the duster, adding, “And it was weird, but he had a bulldog with him.”
Sharra gasped. “That’s sounds like Diesel . . . and his hellhound, Max.”
And I’d stupidly assumed Emmanuel wouldn’t want any demons with hellhounds around him. “No wonder they were able to spot us.”
YEAH, Fang said. MAX WOULD BE ABLE TO SPOT ANY DEMONS AND VAMPIRES IN THE AUDIENCE.
“And they helped Emmanuel?” Sharra said incredulously.
Well, that wouldn’t help her opinion of Paladins. “I don’t think Diesel had a choice, either,” I told her. “Not if he was under the influence of Emmanuel’s blood.”
“But the hellhound?” she asked.
“The blood probably works on hellhounds, too,” I said doubtfully.
IT WOULDN’T NEED TO, Fang said. ALL EMMANUEL WOULD HAVE TO DO IS THREATEN DIESEL, AND MAX WOULD DO ANYTHING TO KEEP HIM SAFE.
I stared at Fang. You’d do that for me?
OF COURSE, he said, seeming surprised I would even doubt it. BUT DON’T LET IT GO TO YOUR HEAD, BABE.
No chance of that—he wouldn’t allow it. But I had to admit the capacity of these hellhounds to love was humbling.
I told Alejandro and Austin what Fang had said about Max. “Maybe we can use that,” I said. “If Fang talks to Max, tells him our plan, explains we don’t want to hurt Diesel.”
MAYBE, Fang said. IF WE ACTUALLY HAD A WORKABLE PLAN. IF NOT, HE MIGHT TURN ON ME.
I repeated that to the others.
“Good idea,” Austin said. “But first we need sleep. We can plan tomorrow.”
“What about Shade?” I didn’t want to leave him alone, with only vampires to keep him company.
“Shade is resting comfortably,” Gwen said from the doorway. “I’ll keep an eye on him.”
Elspeth nodded. “As will I.”
Okay, that I could live with—Shade trusted these two. “How long will it take?” I asked.
“A few hours,” she said. “He lost a lot of blood.”
Sharra shot Austin a dirty look, as if she wanted to blame him again. “I’ll stay,” she said. “He’s my brother.”
“He’ll be fine,” Gwen said. “And he won’t even know you’re here, so it’s no use for you to stay. Why don’t you get some rest, too? It’s been a busy day, and you’ll need all your wits about you to make that plan.”
“An excellent idea,” Alejandro said.
Sharra looked reluctant, but they slowly but surely guided us out of the underground lab. Austin personally steered Sharra into the elevator and made sure she rode up with us.
I headed for bed, wanting to be alone with my thoughts and what I’d learned about Shade during the healing. It wasn’t to be, though. Austin followed me in to my room.
I glanced at him wearily as I sat on the bed. “I’m really not up for this right now.”
He held up his hands. “I just wanted to apologize again. You know I would never deliberately hurt Shade.”
“I know,” I assured him. It wasn’t his way. “Everyone knows, Austin. It wasn’t your fault.”
“I’m not so sure Shade will see it that way,” he said with a wry twist of his mouth.
Maybe. “We’ll convince him. No worries. Now can I please go to sleep?”
He frowned. “You’re weak because of being a template for healing Shade, right?”
“Right.” And this conversation was making me even more tired. “So?”
“So, it’s my fault Shade needed to be healed, and that you had to use the strength spell which depleted Lola. The least you can do is let me help heal you. Help you recharge your batteries. Help Lola.”
I sighe
d, unsure if I wanted to deal with this right now, but Austin looked stubborn, and there was a haunted look in his eyes. Maybe I should do this to help him. Or, even better, shut him up.
Why not? After all, Shade still wasn’t willing to feed Lola. He was too afraid of his own emotions and too stupid to realize that I didn’t need him to leave me alone “for my own good.” Dumb. I was a big girl, and if I was willing to take a chance on him, damn it, he should be willing to do the same.
I glanced at Austin. No strings, no drama, no problem. And Lola was all of a sudden very, very interested, not to mention hungry. “Okay,” I said reluctantly and patted the bed. “Sit here.”
He sat and took off his cowboy hat, his short hair sticking out in strange places.
“You have hat hair,” I said with a grin.
He quickly scrubbed his head. “That better?”
“Not really.” The mussed hair had been endearing, making him look softer, more vulnerable.
Sheesh, what was wrong with me? Why was I seeing Austin as endearing fergawdsake? Must be Lola’s influence. Or I was really tired.
Sighing, I lay down on the bed, unable to muster the energy to do this sitting up. It was more of a mental than physical exhaustion, though the healing had taken its toll there, too.
Austin lay down next to me. “Take as much as you need,” he said.
Martyr much? But, understanding his need to atone, I decided to go ahead and do it. He was right—it was his fault Lola was so weak again since I’d had to use the strength spell to pull him off Shade. I rolled to my side and placed my hand on his chest. Our fields interlaced, and Lola reached weakly for the sustenance she needed.
Responding to Lola’s need, Austin put his arms around me and drew me close. I should have pushed him away, but it would help with the feeding. Or so I told myself. If I was honest, I’d have to admit it was more than that. It felt good to be held by a man again, good to feel wanted for a change, good to just be me.
Why not give in? No one would know. Austin was a gentleman—he’d proved he wouldn’t kiss and tell. And I so needed some affection right now.