I hope you don’t mind, I snapped this pic of you while you were sleeping. I wanted to keep it close to me always!
With that, I crawl into bed and wrap my arm around her, pulling her tight against my body. I love feeling her against my skin. I want to memorize every single thing about this—the way it feels, the way she smells like sweet honey, how the sound of her breathing is like a sweet lullaby singing just for my ears. I know this will be a bittersweet part of my dreams, helping me hold on to her when she goes back to Texas. I’m not sure how I’m going to let her go. I hope it won’t be for long.
I shift a little, putting my arm under her head so I can pull her even closer. I hear a soft sigh and feel her breathing slow even more, letting me know she’s still asleep. I’m not sure how long I lie here, just listening to her breathing with my nose buried in her soft hair. The last thing I think as I drift off to sleep is how I have Heaven in my arms tonight.
I must’ve forgotten to close my blinds. I throw my arm across my eyes. Wow, it’s hot in here already. It’s going to be a scorcher today. And here I thought we’d be heading for fall soon. I guess you never know what the weather’s going to do anymore. I suddenly become aware of the source of heat—it’s behind me, lightly snoring in my ear. What the hell? Then it all comes flashing back to me, how I came to Ethan’s house last night and we talked for a while, and, of course, how we made out against his wall and the couch. Damn, that was so hot. Just thinking about it is already firing up my arousal.
I’m still a little in shock; for years, everything I’ve ever felt about Ethan was in my head. I’ve never voiced how I felt to anyone, not even my girlfriends. Not that I’ve ever been that close to any of them. Now that I think about it, I don’t have any close friends aside from Ethan, and we just spent the past four years not talking. I’m pretty pathetic, I guess. Oh well, I’ve survived just fine, I think. Of course, it would’ve been a lot better if I’d been able to talk with Ethan the whole time, but like we both said last night, there was no point in dwelling on the past when we couldn’t change it anyway. It is what it is. The only question is what are we going to do with the future? Can I really go back to Texas knowing Ethan feels the same about me as I’ve always felt about him?
I can’t believe I crashed on him last night; our first night together and I passed out before he even came back to the room. I haven’t been sleeping well for a while and since I’ve been home, I’ve been tossing and turning, thinking about everything with Ethan. When I have slept, it’s been interrupted with crazy dreams filled with him. Some have even been nightmares. I shudder at the thought of the faceless baby that seems to randomly pop up in all of them. I’ve had a few since I found out about Kelly being pregnant, but I hadn’t had them in a long time—that is, until I came back home. I guess being around Ethan sparked them.
But I didn’t have any bad dreams last night. Now that I think about it, I must’ve slept like a log because I don’t remember any bad dreams—or even waking up at all through the night. It feels amazing to have finally slept, but even better to wake up next to Ethan.
Wait a minute; I better pinch myself to make sure I’m not actually dreaming right now . . . Ow! Nope, not dreaming at all.
I realize I don’t hear Ethan snoring anymore and feel his hard arousal pressed against my back. Mmm, if I wasn’t awake before, I am now. Holy crap, I think my body is on fire. I’ve been on a few dates before, but not once did I ever feel this turned on by a guy. I want him so bad.
I slowly turn over and look at him; he’s lying there with the sexiest grin on his face. Before I realize what I’m doing, I reach up and place my lips on his. I hear a throaty groan, and that’s all the encouragement I need. I pull his head down closer to mine, my fingers tangling in his hair, and push my body tight against his. He wraps his arms around me, holding me even closer. My breasts press against him, and I swear my nipples are so hard I feel like they’ll scratch him.
We continue this duel until we run out of air. Then he releases my mouth and trails his lips down my neck, leaving a burning trail as he goes. Suddenly, he shifts us, placing me on my back with him on top of me; he holds his weight on his forearms at both sides of my head, his hands cradling my head. I run my hands up and down his back, feeling each curve and dip of his smooth muscles. My head is still spinning at the thought of having him in my arms. I never could have imagined he would feel as good as he does. Damn, he has muscles I never even knew existed. I don’t ever want to let go!
Ethan pushes my shirt up, leaving my hard peaks exposed and vulnerable; my panties are sure to be soaked through. He leans back on his knees, staring at me for a few moments. Just as I’m starting to feel a little self-conscious, he lets out a sexy growl and dives back down to me. I can’t fight the urge to give his backside a tight squeeze, and he captures one of my breasts in his mouth while cupping the other and massaging it.
The gentle tugging of his lips on my nipple has my arousal at an all-time high. My core is already pulsing with need; I can’t recall ever being so wound up before. I’ve never been further than kissing with a guy before, but I can’t stand it anymore—I want him, and I want him now. I had never really worried about my virginity before; I always figured that when I was ready I would know. If this isn’t ready enough then I probably never will be.
I gently pull on the hem of his boxers, and I hear him chuckle.
“Eager girl this morning, aren’t you?”
My cheeks are suddenly on fire. I can’t believe I was so bold and he had the nerve to make fun of me! Before I can push him off me, he swoops in and captures my lips with his. At first, I try to put up a struggle, but who am I kidding; he’s such an amazing kisser that in only a few seconds, he has me all wet again.
“I can tell I embarrassed you, Andi, and for that, I’m sorry. I don’t ever want to upset you. I really was just playing with you, baby. I liked it. I don’t want to rush you, or any of this, for that matter. I’ve waited for years to have you in my arms, so we can take as long as you need, and go as slow as you want. The ball is in your court.”
I don’t say anything; instead, I pull his head back down to mine and kiss him with all the passion I’ve had locked inside me for as long as I can remember. This man, he is too perfect for me. My fingers are still tangled in his hair as he moves those talented lips back to my breasts. I can feel a jerk pulse through his hard-on, which is still pressing on my belly, sending a shock through my body, straight to my core. I flex my hips, grinding them against his, and I feel him shudder.
I’m still amazed that this is all real. I don’t ever want to wake up from this, nor do I ever want to wake up without Ethan wrapped around me again. I know I’m supposed to start my new job in a few days, but I can’t imagine letting go of him again. I don’t know if I’m strong enough to handle it.
“Are you okay, baby? You tensed up, did I hurt you?”
“No, Ethan, you’re amazing. I suppose I did tense up. Sometimes I can’t get out of my head, I guess. But no, you did nothing wrong. You feel really good, actually.”
“What is it, Andi?” Ethan leans on his forearms, looking me straight in the eyes. I feel bad though, I can see the worry swirling in the deep blue sea of them.
“Ethan, don’t worry, I’m okay. I was just caught up in the moment and how amazing I felt, how I never want to wake up from this dream and how I don’t want to ever be without you. Which, of course, led into how I don’t know if I can handle going back to my life in Texas. I worked hard to get this new job, and now it feels like a punishment for leaving you before.”
Tears spring to my eyes and I turn my head. I can’t believe how true the words are and how hard it hurt saying them. I’ve never allowed myself to feel bad about leaving before when it came to Ethan. Sure, I’ve felt guilty numerous times when it came to my parents, but with Ethan it was different. I guess because it was fueled by anger towards him for shutting me out, and at Kelly for stealing him away from me. I know I never would’ve accompli
shed my independence, not to mention the degrees I worked my ass off for, if I hadn’t left. But now I don’t care. None of it seems to matter.
Ethan rolls to the side, pulling me closer while tucking his arm under my head. He touches my chin, tilting it up towards him.
“Andi, please look at me.”
I lie there for a moment, trying to pull myself together; I hate to cry, and I sure don’t want to do it in front of Ethan. I finally take a deep breath then bite my lower lip, trying to make myself chill out. I look up in time to see desire flash through his eyes, which is quickly replaced by a gentler expression. He must be feeling some of the same battles I am. I find some comfort in knowing that, at least this time, I’m not alone in my feelings.
“Andi, you didn’t do anything to be punished for. You’ve done great for yourself, and I’m so proud of you. Don’t ever feel bad for accomplishing your goals. As for your new job, I assume you applied for it because it was somewhere you really wanted to work, correct?”
“Well, yeah. At the time I applied, I thought it would be a good opportunity for me. I wasn’t sure I was qualified enough, being a new grad and all, but I took a chance and apparently they’re taking a chance on me. But since I came home to visit with everyone, I realize how much I’ve missed the country life and everyone in it. Including you. My main goal when I came home was to see my parents and avoid you. It hurt too much to think about you, so the last thing I wanted to do was see how happy you were without me.” I can’t stop the tears from falling now. I feel bad that I was jealous of how happy I thought he was without me. But I lived through hell for four long years; it doesn’t go away in the blink of an eye.
Ethan puts his hand around my waist and pulls me tight against him, wiping my tears with the pad of his thumb, making me melt a little more.
“Hey, baby, it’s all right. I’m here, you’re here, and we’re in each other’s arms, okay? We’re right where we’re supposed to be. Like I said before, everything happens for a reason and while we may never know that reason, it doesn’t matter. We’re together, finally—that’s what is important. I don’t want to ever lose us again, so no matter what we do from here on out, I promise that I’ll be as honest as I can with you and tell you what I’m thinking as much as I can. I won’t ever let you take off mad at me again. Whether you like it or not,” Ethan says with a laugh. “So, not to change the subject, but did you have any plans for today?”
“Umm, it seems like I was supposed to something, but I don’t know what it is. All I know is whatever I do, I want to do it with you.” This brings a big smile to his face, and I can’t help but smile back.
Ethan puts his hand on the back of my head and pulls me to him, pressing a gentle kiss on my lips.
“I’m glad to hear that, because I want to spend my day with you. Are you hungry?”
As I’m about to say I’m fine, my stomach betrays me and lets out a loud growl.
Ethan laughs and says, “I’ll take that for a yes. Come on, let’s get dressed and go out today. That work for you?”
“Of course, let’s do it.” I place a quick kiss on his lips and then we get up. I grab my clothes from the chair where I laid them last night and go to the restroom, quickly take care of business, and get dressed. I dig through the drawer until I find a new toothbrush, smiling as I think how not much changes. Ethan’s mom always kept extra toothbrushes in the drawer; she said you never knew when you might have a sleepover, and you always should be prepared for it. I bet she wasn’t ever planning on me sleeping over in her son’s arms all night though. The thought makes me let out a giggle.
I finish quickly, placing my toothbrush in the holder next to Ethan’s. I’m sure he’ll notice, just as I’m sure he won’t mind me being here with him again tonight. I want to spend as much time with him as I can before I have to leave.
I come out of the restroom and see Ethan standing there smiling, his cell phone at his ear.
“That sounds great . . . Yeah . . . Oh, I agree, I think it’ll work out great . . . Uh-huh . . . Okay, well, we’re going out for a few hours, but then we can catch up when I’m done with that. Will that work for you?”
Hmm, I wonder who he’s talking to. It’s Friday, and I’m sure Dad is fine with Ethan taking the day off considering the circumstances, but maybe there’s a job that has to be done today. I’ll have to ask him about the shop when he gets off the phone. And I should swing by and pick up my car sometime today.
Ethan is walking around the house with his phone still to his ear; I don’t think he’s realized I’m out of the restroom yet. He’s already cleaned up and dressed, so I’m guessing he used his mom’s restroom and shower. Man, he’s quick.
He has his back to me, still on the phone with the occasional “yes, okay,” when he bends down, picking up his boots. Damn, he has a fine ass. My fingers throb at the memory of how awesome it felt squeezing it, the thought sending a jolt of electricity straight to my core. It’s amazing how quick he gets to me.
Suddenly, Ethan stands and turns around, catching me looking at him. I feel my cheeks burn, knowing I was busted staring at his backside. A cocky grin crosses his face, and I can’t help but smile myself; he looks so sexy, smiling with his tousled hair falling down on his forehead. I walk across the room and I lay a quiet peck on his lips, deciding to behave since I don’t know who he’s talking to. I sit on the couch and wait for him to finish.
I’m trying to get off the phone with Ron, but I don’t want to be rude. Andi is so beautiful and when she walked over and kissed me, it was all I could do not to hang up on him, scoop her up, and take her back to my bed so I could peel the sexy jeans off her and make love to her all day. I know we haven’t crossed that line, but I don’t know how much longer I can wait. I also don’t know how she feels about it. Besides, I know it sounds cheesy, but I really want our first time to be special. Andi means the world to me, and I want to show her that.
“Hello? Ethan, are you still there?”
“Yeah, sorry. Yes, I’m here. I must have lost you for a moment, what did you say?”
“Yeah, sure you did. Go have fun with Andi, but have her back at the house by around six tonight, okay? We should have everything set up by then. Don’t forget, it’s a surprise for her.”
“Don’t worry, I got it. See you then, bye.” Finally. I hang up and charge after Andi, who squeals as she realizes I’m coming at her. I jump on the couch, pulling her down on top of me. I bring her head to mine and place a hard, passionate kiss on her lips. Damn, I can’t get enough of her taste!
We finally have to break our kiss for air. She lays her head on my chest and I wrap my arms around her, holding her tight as we both catch our breath. After a few moments, she looks up at me.
“So, who were you talking to? And what’s going on later?”
Uh-oh. I quickly think back to make sure I hadn’t let any details out while I was on the phone.
“Uh, I was just talking to Ron and letting him know that I wasn’t coming in today, that we’re going to do some errands and we would catch up with him later. He said that was fine and to swing by and get your car since we aren’t going to be open tomorrow.”
“Dad’s closing the shop on Saturdays now? Since when?”
“Well, he’s open every other Saturday. He says life’s too short to be cooped up working our life away every day. We usually go fishing, or he does something with your mom. I think it’s been good for them; they seem to be happier than they were before.”
“Hmm . . . Well, I’m glad they’re doing that; I just didn’t know about it. But I was thinking I should pick up my car today anyway. I should be leaving tomorrow, but I’ve decided to wait until Sunday so I have one more day with you.”
She offers me a bittersweet smile. My heart catches a little at the thought of her leaving so soon, but I push it aside. I want to enjoy every last second I can with her; I’ll have plenty of time to drown in misery when she leaves. Placing a soft kiss on her lips, I squeeze her tight.
I don’t want to let her go, but I know she needs to eat so I ask if she’s ready to get some food.
“I’ll go anywhere with you, Ethan.”
Oh, this girl!
“I like the sound of that. Okay, let’s go.” We stand and walk hand in hand to the door. I open it, letting her go out ahead of me before I lock up and we head towards my truck.
“Oh, I guess I should take Mom’s car back to her so I can pick mine up later.”
“How about we take it to the shop and she can ride in with your dad, or we can take it to her later. This way, we can get something for breakfast. I know you’re hungry, you didn’t eat much at dinner last night.”
“You worry too much, but that’s fine with me. I’ll meet you at the shop.” She starts to walk to Bev’s car.
“Whoa, wait a minute, Andi.” Easily catching up to her, I grab her and turn her around, giving her a hard kiss. “I’ll see you in a few minutes, sweetheart. Be careful.” I give her another quick kiss and let go of her.
“Okay, see you soon,” she says, a big smile on her face. She goes around to the driver’s side of the car, gives me a wave, and climbs in. She puts her seat belt on before pulling out of my driveway. Good girl. Hey, I want her to be safe. I quickly run back to my truck and jump in, pulling out of the driveway and quickly catching up to her. I follow her back to the shop.
I’m glad I thought of this plan instead of her going home; I didn’t want to chance taking her to the farmhouse and Andi catching on to anything. The party plans are sure to be in full swing, and I agree with Ron and Bev wanting to surprise her. I’m sure she’ll be excited.
After we graduated, she told her family to cancel her graduation party. Apparently, she was angry about our fight and didn’t feel up to entertaining anyone. Also, according to Ron, if I wasn’t there then she didn’t want anyone there.
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