I tried to push the annoying thoughts away, but couldn't manage it until I'd dressed and done my makeup and was wandering through the game world checking everything. Not a trace of the disease was left anywhere, and I was both thrilled Andrew had succeeded and angry with myself for not having been more help.
Once I'd made sure the little contests and bonus gifts I'd planned for the special weekend were all still present and working properly, I logged out my official character and went back in with my player character. I found several of my usual game buddies, and we teamed up to kill dragons and monsters and protect the sacred grove I'd designed, although they didn't know that.
The company's rules were strict: no official business to be handled with the player characters, never even a hint of game play on the corporate ones, and no connection between them. A lot of my coworkers never played the game, but I'd loved online role-playing games for years before getting the job and I loved them even more now that I knew how much work went on behind the scenes.
After an hour or so, I heard Andrew shifting in the chair. A glance told me he wasn't anywhere close to waking up, but his change in position woke Ruby, who climbed down and wandered over to me.
I picked her up and hugged her. "You've got a new best friend, don't you?" I whispered. "Don't need me any more."
She gave a huge yawn.
"Too early for the drama queen act? I agree. Want your breakfast?"
I logged out of the game and gave Ruby her shot and food, then checked out the game's code while she ate.
Andrew had done a great job. He'd documented what he'd done and written up a few recommendations for how to prevent such a thing from happening again, and he'd even spotted another sabotage that was to take place in a few weeks. He hadn't wasted time fixing it last night but he'd noted where to find it and how to get rid of it.
And I'd been passed out on the couch dreaming of foursomes.
Such a weird dream. I shivered remembering the deep reluctance I'd felt and the agony of facing Julie. Andrew had been so sweet but he must have thought I was the biggest freak ever.
Ruby, finished eating, wandered over to him. I called her in a whisper, not wanting her to disturb him, but she turned her back deliberately and clambered up into his lap. Without opening his eyes, he wrapped an arm around her furry body as she settled down to sleep.
I watched them for a moment, impressed by how quickly he'd won Ruby over. She hadn't even sat on Sandra's lap until she'd known her for weeks. Maybe an overnight work session was good for bonding.
Wanting to let Liz know how much work Andrew had done, I went into my email but was sidetracked by a message from him with a file attached.
Rhiannon,
I knew you wanted to remember the dream, so when I realized you were having it I brought over my phone and used its voice recorder to capture what you said. It actually came out pretty clear, and I hope it helps.
Andrew
I plugged in my headphones and listened to the recording, which brought a lump to my throat at my own obvious sadness and his gentle encouragement to keep talking. How sweet, and what a quick thinker to grab his phone on the way over to me. Louisa would be thrilled to hear the recording at my next counseling session.
Once I'd emailed Liz to let her know how the night had gone, sending a copy to Andrew as well, I settled onto the couch with a glass of water and a novel about a woman struggling to prepare for her first marathon. I wanted a break from my computer, and I had to do something quiet so I wouldn't disturb my two sleeping beauties. My apartment felt different with Andrew there, even though he wasn't awake. It felt like home, and I didn't want that to end.
The comfortable peacefulness continued until eight forty-five, when a beeping noise began somewhere in the arm chair. Ruby was too deeply asleep to care, but Andrew stuffed one hand under the cushion and stopped the beeping. He pulled his cell phone out of the chair and rubbed his hand across his face, then looked over at me.
"Hey. Good morning." His voice, rough with sleep, sent a weird pang through my chest. I hadn't heard a man sound like that for a long time, or seen one waking up either. So intimate. "How are you? Did you sleep okay after..."
"I did, thanks to you. And thanks for the recording. I'm sorry you had to see all that."
He cleared his throat. "I'm sorry you have to live with it. I'm just glad I was able to help a bit. If I did."
"If? You're kidding, right? With that plus all the stuff you did last night? You're amazing."
He blushed. "Not amazing. And I didn't do that much, you know. I meant to fix the other sabotage after the disease was gone but I didn't have the energy."
"Gee, I can't imagine why. What time did you finish?"
"Um, four-thirty, I think? Maybe closer to five."
"So why'd you set an alarm for so early?"
"I figured I should be online before nine to make sure things were still okay." He shifted in the chair. "And also I didn't want to sleep all day and make you have to kick me out."
"The game's working perfectly so don't worry about that, and after last night you can sleep as long as you want. I'm so sorry I didn't give you a blanket or anything. You deserved it after all that work. I'm going to tell Liz to get you two ponies."
He looked down at Ruby. "I'd rather have this cat."
I held up my fists. "Don't even think about it, buster."
He laughed and ran his hand along her back. "Does she usually sleep in this chair?"
I nodded, and he said, "Thought so. When I took it last night, she gave me this look. So much disgust in such a cute little face."
"Gotta love a cat with 'tude'," I said, echoing his comment of the night before.
He grinned. "Most definitely. And she's a good heating pad so don't worry about the blanket thing. I was fine. And if the game's fine, I guess I'd better move her so I can get out of your hair."
I didn't want him to go. With Sandra away, I had no plans for the weekend, and I liked having him around. "You're right, you know. We probably should be online when the event goes live. You're welcome to stay for a while if you want."
"Are you sure?"
I nodded. "But if you have other plans, it's okay."
"I have to meet my parents at the airport tonight. They're flying in from Vancouver for a friend's wedding next week. Other than that, I was going to spend the day playing the game."
"You play?" I said, surprised.
He looked sheepish. "I know, it's nerdy, but I love it."
"What's your top-level character?"
"Level seventy-two wizard."
"Not bad." I gave him a big smile. "My swordswoman's a seventy-four."
"You play too?" He shook his head in amazement. "I didn't think anyone else there actually played in their spare time."
"Most of them don't. I'm a nerd too."
"The nerds will inherit the earth, you know."
"Let's hope so."
We grinned at each other, and he said, "So, should we get logged in?"
After an hour of uneventful supervision with our official characters, he said, "You wouldn't happen to have a bagel or anything, would you?"
I was so used to being hungry I hadn't noticed. I should have thought of him, though. Horrified at my continuing lack of hostessing, I said, "No, but there's a Griffin Café right around the corner. Stay here and make sure nothing blows up and I'll be right back."
"It's okay," he tried.
"It so isn't. I'm ashamed of myself for not feeding you. Five minutes."
Joel wouldn't be thrilled at how many meals I'd eaten off-plan, but I couldn't help it. A bagel wouldn't ruin things too badly, as long as I made sure it wasn't too big, and black coffee was permitted on the plan. I didn't particularly like it, but I was getting used to it.
Food acquired, I arrived home to be greeted by the sounds of Christina Aguilera. I set my purchases on the desk near our computers and said, "You're just full of surprises. Didn't expect you to be into Christina."
> He held up a CD case. "It's yours."
"That doesn't explain why you're playing it."
"I like her. Plus, she's fun to sing along with." He joined Christina, with a truly terrifying falsetto, but fortunately for only a few seconds before we both burst into laughter.
"You're an odd one, you know." I shook my head. "A martial artist who likes Christina."
"A computer nerd martial artist who likes Christina," he corrected. "So I'm even weirder. Ask me if I like Britney Spears too."
I narrowed my eyes and studied him suspiciously then said, "Sorry, I won't. I'm scared of the answer."
"You should be." He grinned at me. "This bagel mine?"
We monitored the game while we ate, then Andrew said, "I've never played with a swordswoman of the same level as me, you know."
"If I play with you, you still wouldn't have. 'Cause I'm higher than you."
"And you'll never let me forget it, will you?"
I made my best innocent face.
He laughed. "That's what I thought."
We sat in silence for a moment, then I realized that he didn't want to make me feel like I had to play with him. "I've never played with someone else in the room with me."
"No? Me either."
"We should try it," I said, and his grin made it clear I'd said exactly what he wanted.
Having him there was so different, but so much fun. We talked freely as we played, planning who we'd attack next and congratulating each other on good moves, and it wasn't until my stomach started growling that I realized it was three in the afternoon.
"Want some more pizza while we play?"
He glanced at his watch. "How'd it get to be so late?"
"Time flies when you're killing monsters."
"So true." He pondered then said, "Actually..."
My stomach twisted. Of course he had every right to leave, but I didn't want him to. How much I wanted him to stay surprised me, and scared me a little.
"Actually, my eyes are getting tired. Could I take you out for something to eat?"
Relief and happiness swept me, even though another meal with him wouldn't do my diet any favors. "You don't have to do that. If anything, I should be taking you out."
"You bought me a bagel and coffee."
"You bought me pizza."
He studied me. "How about this? I take you out and you take me out."
"That makes no sense," I said, smiling. "But sure."
*****
We parted ways after that late lunch, once we'd confused our server by requesting separate bills and paying each other's bill, and I did my best to convince myself we'd be back to business as usual on Monday. But when Liz called us both into her office to thank us for our work, just the sight of him warmed me deep inside.
Thinking of him now warms me the same way, and I let the sweetness of it flow over me, how we fit together, two nerds in a pod. Connecting with Bill was like a lightning strike; with Andrew it's been more like lava rising in a volcano. But in both cases, plenty of heat.
I flip open the laptop and make a file called simply "Andrew", then sit and stare at it for a while. If this is the last communication I get to have with him, what do I want to say? I don't know, so I just start typing.
Dear Andrew,
First off, thank you for sending me that rose background. It might be the last flower I get to see, and it's gorgeous.
And so are you. You're the biggest sweetheart on the planet and I'm so glad I got to know you. After Bill died I didn't know if I'd ever fall in love again, but you give me hope.
I'm so sorry about Joel. But I'm so glad you were there for me.
Do I really want to mention the stupid mistake I made? Or should I erase that part?
As I study the screen, excitement suddenly spills through me and I don't know why. Confused, I raise my head, and hear a sound that I must have unconsciously recognized.
A police siren.
Chapter Seven
I am so happy I can hardly breathe. This is it. Saved. Will it be a big burly man or a skinny one, or a woman? I don't care who it is.
The siren's getting louder, and I burst out laughing with sheer delight. Soon, so soon. I'm so glad I didn't eat those stupid cookies.
I'll hear the siren peak, then stop as the car stops. The cop will come down the hill toward me. I imagine him as an older guy, a little overweight but with kind eyes. He'll peer in the window at me and say, "You all right?" Then he'll help me get out, or get help if he can't, and it'll all be over. Soon.
My heart pounds so hard it hurts.
The siren's sound peaks.
And then it begins to fade.
My stomach twists as all my excitement turns to dread. Where is my cop going? He must know I'm here, so why didn't he stop? Surely he saw my tire tracks heading off the road.
I hit the horn as fast and hard as I can, over and over, even though I know it doesn't work. It might, even once, and that might be all I need. In case it's not, I also scream my loudest, and then abandon the horn and start clapping my hands and hitting the car's door and roof to try to augment my screaming.
I pause every few seconds to see whether I'm having an effect. Each time I do, the siren's pitch has dropped and it's a bit quieter, and then I can't hear it at all.
I drop my stinging hands to my side and sit, too shocked to move, staring vacantly out my crack-riddled window at the snow. Still falling heavily, it completely covers the tops of the nearby rocks and fallen trees. Maybe three inches of thick fluffy snowflakes.
There's a blank spot in my head, a place where my brain knows the truth but can't let itself accept and understand it. It feels numb and stupid, like how your lip feels after the dentist freezes your mouth. You know it's there, but it's utterly out of your control. The rest of my mind is keeping itself fully engaged with the snow. I have no conscious thoughts. I don't want any.
After a long time, though, I make myself say it out loud, make the blank spot admit what it knows and the rest of my brain hear and understand.
"If there's this much snow here in the trees, there's way more up on the road. The officer didn't see your tracks. Nobody will see them. You're on your own."
Immediately I doubt this assessment. Of course someone will see. People don't die like this, ten feet off the highway. I'm barely twenty minutes away from my parents' place. And I can't be on my own, because I can't get out on my own.
My head splits in two again. Half of my brain is screaming, "If you can't get out and they can't find you, you're going to die in here," and the other half took another shot of anesthetic. I can feel both parts. The stunned silence in my skull. The screaming echoing over and around it.
I cup my hands over my mouth and breathe, hoping to stop the shrieking in my head, and eventually I'm calm enough to think, at least a little bit. I need to analyze the situation.
Fact number one: that car did not stop.
Fact number two: if they were racing to another call and saw my tracks, the officers might not stop but they would send another car.
Fact number three: if another car doesn't come shortly, then they didn't see me.
These are not comforting facts. But they're what I've got.
Along with one more: my chances are far better if I get out of the car. I could stand by the side of the road and wait for another car to drive by.
Actually, duh. If I could go to the road, I could also get my stupid phone and call for help.
But it all depends on being able to go.
And right now I can't.
I try to wiggle my toes, pushing them up as far as I can. Through the awful splintery pain, I can feel the bones in the top of my foot shifting, pressing against the car. They're not moving very far, though, and my foot doesn't slide even a little bit.
If it won't move, maybe... probably not, but maybe...
Using my unhurt foot and both hands, I try to pull the car up, putting everything I've got into it. Then I try to push the floor down. No sur
prise, the car doesn't shift at all. I didn't think it would but I had to try.
I sit back, panting. The car won't move, so the only option is the foot. I already tried pulling it straight out, and it did nothing but cause a lot of pain. Could I somehow get myself onto the passenger seat, haul myself over the gearshift, and pull from an angle? Sneak out from under whatever's pinning me?
Or... open my door and slither out to pull from that angle?
When I push open the door, cold air and snowflakes spin into the car. I'd thought it was getting cool inside but that's nothing compared to what's outside.
There wouldn't be animals here, would there? What kind of creature would live beside a rural Ontario highway? Coyotes, maybe. I do not want a coyote in the car with me. Or any animal, for that matter. I don't even want a bunny rabbit.
But the door opened, and that's pretty much the first thing that's worked in my favor since the crash so I take it as a sign. I push my butt to the front edge of the seat then slide down onto the bottom of the door frame. My knee protests the twisting, since my foot is still facing straight ahead, but a free foot and angry knee is far better than a trapped foot and cheerful knee so I ignore it and pull, trying to turn my foot as I do.
When I first feel it shift, I can't believe it. It's such a tiny movement I'm afraid I imagined it, but I pull again and feel it for sure this time. My foot is sliding inside my boot.
But it hurts more each time I pull.
I twist even further and hang out of the car, supporting myself with one mittened hand in the snow and one clinging to the door frame. I give a mighty yank, and the pain that slams through me makes everything that came before feel like a caress.
Something is in my foot, and it's ripping it to shreds.
Whimpering at the agony flooding my body, I hold still. Now that I'm not moving the pain begins to ease, and as it dulls I can pick out its centre. It's focused around the top of my foot, near my ankle, so I'll have to pull my whole size-nine foot out, letting the object cut through it, to get free.
Toronto Collection Volume 1 (Toronto Series #1-5) Page 60