Secret Kiss

by Melanie Shawn

  Adam was good at coming up with cover stories, but he wasn’t sure how he’d explain that one.

  “I’m so sorry,” she whispered against his neck as he ran his hand through her hair.

  Snuggling into her hair, he assured her, “There’s nothing to be sorry about. I just didn’t want to embarrass myself.”

  “Kids, do you want coffee?” Walter asked them.

  “No,” they answered in unison as they settled back into their seats.

  Whether or not he and Jane ordered coffee wouldn’t end this dinner any sooner. It wasn’t like they could ditch Walter and Dolores while they were enjoying their after-dinner java. But, if turning coffee down gained him even a thirty-second advantage, he’d take it. Hell, he’d take a ten-second advantage.

  As Walter discussed why he’d switched to decaf, Adam was trying to process the fact that Jane really hadn’t had any idea that she’d been getting so frisky. He’d seen women play coy, but when he’d said that he wouldn’t have been able to be able to walk out of there if she’d continued doing what she’d been doing, it wasn’t coyness that spread across her face. She’d been mortified.

  That was cute as hell to Adam. That meant that Jane felt so comfortable with him that she hadn’t been thinking about where her hand had been. She’d been doing what had felt natural to her. And, holy shit, that had felt natural.

  The more time he spent around Jane, the more he saw that there was not a calculated or manipulative bone in her body, and that, more than anything else, was the thing that was breaking down the last of the walls he’d built around his heart.

  Those walls had been up a lot longer than he’d originally assumed. If someone had asked Adam where the walls had originated, he would’ve pointed to when everything had gone south with Alexis, but that wasn’t true. He’d never felt this connected, this open, this real with anyone in his life. Especially not his ex.

  He had never truly trusted her. Not with himself, at least. He’d trusted her not to do what she’d done, but being with Jane, even though he wasn’t really with Jane, was making him see that he’d never actually let Alexis in.

  In the short time he’d spent with Jane, she was closer to him and had seen more of the real him than Alexis had in a decade.

  “Oh, no. Let me get that.” Jane’s voice rose as she leaned across the table.

  Adam realized that the check had arrived and she was trying to keep her grandfather from paying it.

  “Walter, please. Let me get it.” Adam, having much longer arms than Jane, was able to easily reach the bill folder.

  “Oh, no, son. It’s our treat,” Walter protested.

  “Please. It’s the least I can do. I insist.” Adam didn’t want to wrestle the man, but there was no way he was going to let Jane’s grandparents pick up the bill.

  “Oh, Walter, let Adam pay.” Dolores swatted her husband’s arm before saying pointedly as she stood, “Thank you, Adam. Now, take me upstairs, Wally. That bathtub is calling my name.”

  When Jane’s grandfather heard that, he was out of his chair, moving with speed Adam hadn’t known the man possessed. He barely gave a wave before snuggling his wife close to him and whispering something in her ear that had Dolores giggling like a schoolgirl and swatting him again.

  “They can’t keep their hands off each other. Never could,” Jane said with a sigh.

  “I know the feeling.” Adam looked at her as he waved the waiter over.

  The smile Adam was finding to be more addictive than caffeine—or, from what he’d heard, crack cocaine—lifted Jane’s lips. In that moment, Adam had a flash of the future, one where he and Jane were at a restaurant in fifty years, still crazy about each other, and arguing over how much sugar Adam could have in his coffee. He’d never seen that kind of future, even with Alexis.

  “Are you okay?” Jane asked as she touched his forearm, her beautiful face etched with concern.

  “Yeah. I’m better than okay.” Adam grinned as the waiter finally arrived and he was able to take care of the check.

  He wasn’t just okay. For the first time in his life…he was in love.

  Chapter 22

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  The elevator ride was taking forever and going too fast at the same time. She was coming out of her skin with anticipation at the thought of getting into the room. But on the flip side of that was the realization that this night was going to be over soon and she wanted to be present, to really cherish every minute—every second—they had.

  For someone like Jane, that was easier said than done. Her mind was constantly racing with what could possibly happen next. What the worst repercussion could conceivably be for whatever was happening and how she would handle it. How she would survive it.

  That was another thing her therapist had told her was a by-product of having lost her parents. Professionally, that trait had been one of her greatest strengths. Personally, it had worked for her as well. She had known she could handle the outcomes of Disasters #1 – 5. Basically, the biggest fallout had been that she’d had to start dating again.

  Hindsight being twenty-twenty, she knew she hadn’t really been invested in the person she’d been with. She’d had relationships spanning years and she hadn’t felt a tenth of what she felt for Adam. How in the world was she going to go on with her life as if nothing had happened when this was over?

  Adam hadn’t spoken since he’d paid the check, and she wondered what he was thinking. Last night, in the garage, everything had happened so organically. She might have shown up on Adam’s doorstep wearing nothing but a silk robe, but the truth was that she really had gotten locked out of her house. This was different. This was premeditated sexy time which had sounded great up until she had stepped into the elevator.

  Now, she was in her head. She couldn’t stop thinking of everything that could possibly go wrong. What if last night had only been so hot because it had been spontaneous? What if tonight was less spectacular because it was somewhat planned? What if things between them weren’t as explosive as they had been against the wall or on the weight bench?

  The doors opened, and emotions buzzed through her like bees around a hive. She was nervous. Anxious. Excited. Scared.

  As they stepped onto their floor, Adam guided her to their room with his hand on her back. She wondered if he could feel her shaking. Would he know she was nervous? Was nervousness a turn-off?

  Jane had never been this freaked out about having sex, not even when she’d lost her virginity. She had been curious and a little apprehensive that it would hurt, but crawling-out-of-her-skin nervous? Not even close.

  Adam’s hand never left her back as he slid the keycard into the door and smoothly opened it.

  Walking into the room, Jane was starting to worry that Adam was having second thoughts as well. When he spoke, he didn’t put her nerves to rest. He amplified them tenfold.

  “Listen.” His voice sounded measured as the door clicked into place behind him. “We really need to talk.”

  Tears began to prick at the backs of her eyes. She wished she could just disappear. Vanish. What had she been thinking when she’d agreed to this? Of course he would have second thoughts. Look at him.

  “No, it’s fine.” She tried to keep her voice steady as she let him off the hook. The last thing she wanted was for him to know how devastating this was for her. “We don’t have to talk. Don’t worry about it.”

  She tried to move past Adam into the bathroom. She just wanted to get this stupid dress off, put her sweats on, and curl up on the sofa, because she didn’t trust herself to lie in the same bed with Adam. Her mind and broken heart might have known that nothing was going to happen, but her body had its own ideas—as was evidenced during dinner. She still couldn’t believe she’d been groping Adam and hadn’t realized it. Even now, it was hard for her to believe that it had happened. But it had. She’d been stroking the zipper line of his slacks.

  Hello? Who was she?!

  Apparently, a girl who felt men up while eatin
g with her grandparents, Jane answered her own rhetorical question.

  Moving to the side didn’t get her anywhere. Adam stepped in front of her and wrapped his hands around her upper arms. When he didn’t speak for a moment, she felt drawn like a moth to the flame and lifted her eyes to his.

  He was intently studying her face, and there was so much emotion there that it almost caused the threatening tears to jump the gun and join the party.

  “You’re upset.” Adam voice was strained.

  Yeah. No shit, Sherlock. Jane shocked herself when she thought up such a biting comeback. Hmm, it seemed that sexual frustration, no sleep, and extreme embarrassment turned her into a bitch with a capital B.

  “I’m fine.” She forced her mouth to lift in a smile as she lied through her teeth.

  “No. You’re not,” he shot back. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing.” She let out a small laugh, trying to act casual. Lifting her arms, she stepped out of his hold, turning her hands over she assured him, “I’m good. We don’t have to do anything, and we especially don’t need to talk about it.”

  He blinked and shook his head. “Wait. You think that I don’t want anything to happen tonight?”

  “Can we not talk about this?” She crossed to the right in a second attempt to make her great escape.

  Her plan was foiled once again, but this time, he didn’t just hold her arms. In one quick move, he had her up against the wall, her dress around her waist, and her legs wrapped around him. Grabbing his wide shoulders for support, she gasped as she felt solid evidence between her legs that told her that her earlier assumption might have been incorrect.

  Even through her lace panties and his slacks, Jane could feel the steel length of his erection pulsing urgently with need. She rocked her hips into the hardness that was pressed against her. She hadn’t meant to, but when it came to Adam, her body went rogue, moving independently of her brain.

  Adam’s forehead rested against hers, and their labored breathing was the sole sound in the hotel room, which was lit with nothing but the glittering lights of the city shining in through the windows. As her chest rapidly rose and fell, her heart pounded against her ribs. Every fiber in her being was alive with desire as her core rubbed enticingly against his rock-hard length, and she realized that her hips weren’t moving of their own accord. Adam’s large hand was grasping her backside, tilting her body up and down as his hands flexed, massaging her lace-covered butt cheek. His other hand was wrapped around the back of her neck, threading his fingers in the hair at the base of her neck.

  He asked, his voice sounding tortured, “How can you think I don’t want you?”

  Jane couldn’t speak. Not that she was sure she would know what to say even if she could. Now, her insecurities seemed silly, but a moment ago, they’d been so real.

  His fingers tightened at her neck, and the sensation shot straight between her legs.

  His breath was heavy as he continued. “All I do is think about you. I can’t stop thinking about you. Wanting you. You drive me crazy. How can you not see that?”

  Tears were once again forming in her eyes, but this time, it was because she was so overwhelmed with pleasure and emotion. Good emotions. The feeling of Adam’s masculine body pinning her against the wall, being totally surrounded and supported by him while he said the things he was saying, was so overwhelming in the best possible way.

  “I just thought,” she tried to explain, “when you said you wanted to talk… I thought you didn’t want to…”

  His entire body tensed at her words. He breathed through his nose as he continued rocking against her sex. Her panties grew wetter as her inner muscles began pulsing with release.

  Then his body stopped moving. His fingers stopped massaging her butt and pulling her into him.

  “That’s not what I wanted to talk about,” Adam rasped.

  “Okay.” She believed him. She really did.

  “I needed to tell you—”

  “No.” She stopped him. “It can wait.”

  After the emotional roller coaster she’d been on the last few hours—thinking this wasn’t going to happen, then thinking it was, only to question whether it should, then circling back to the beginning of the ride and thinking it wasn’t—she still felt strapped to the ride. Like she was at the top of the drop—the drop she wanted to plunge down more than she wanted to breathe. Talking could take her on a loop-de-loop she didn’t want to go on. She just wanted to fall. She wanted to fall with Adam. Because she knew he would be there to pick her up.

  “Jane.”

  She heard the warning in his voice, but she shook her head. “No. All that matters to me is right now. Tonight. I just want you, Adam. Please.”

  Never before had Jane begged to be with a man, and she couldn’t imagine she ever would again. But tonight…somehow, tonight would be worth pleading for.

  She moved her hand between their bodies and stroked Adam’s thickness. “Can we please just be together tonight, even if it’s not real? For just tonight, can it be real?”

  As a deep, tortured groan rumbled in his chest, she found herself being carried across the room with purpose. Next thing she knew, she was being lowered to the bed at the same time that her dress was being pulled off over her head. It was all happening so fast that it was a blur. Once she was freed from the confines of her dress, Adam was at the end of the bed, stripping his shirt and his pants off.

  With a boldness borne from the fact that tonight was all she had, she sat up and moved to where he was standing. On her hands and knees before him, wearing only her bra and underwear, she took full advantage of the fact that he’d removed his pants and boxers and wrapped her fingers around his shaft. When she felt the weight, her core tightened deliciously with need.

  She’d never actually taken a man in her mouth before. Disaster #3 had wanted her to, but she hadn’t been able to bring herself to. It had seemed so…intimate. She’d held a penis before, but she’d never sucked one. Her mouth watered at the small bead of moisture on his tip. She wanted to taste him.

  Going with her instinct, she leaned forward and licked the tiny drop. It tasted sweet, and she wanted more, so she flattened her tongue and licked again.

  “Fuck,” Adam hissed. “You really are going to kill me.”

  “Oh, sorry. I’ve never…” She sat back on her heels and looked up at him. If she was going to do this, she wasn’t going to hold back. What was the point? “I’ve never done this, so if that was bad—”

  “You’ve never given head before?” Adam asked in disbelief.

  She shook her head and her hair brushed over her shoulders.

  “And no one had ever gone down on you before last night?”

  She continued shaking her head.

  “But you weren’t a virgin?” he asked slowly.

  Jane laughed a little. “No. I wasn’t a virgin. But I can count the number of guys I’ve been with on one hand.” She figured that might give him glimpse into her experience—or lack thereof.

  “How did you not…” He was at a loss. “Who the hell were these guys you were with?”

  She shrugged. “The wrong ones. Obviously.”

  He stood, his erection proudly jutting out, but his hands were at his sides. Looking down at her, he breathed in through his nose and out through his mouth. Something was going on behind his aqua stare, but she couldn’t tell what he was thinking. Had she said something wrong? Should she have kept her mouth shut?

  “You weren’t doing it wrong. It felt good. Too good,” Adam spoke deliberately, his deep voice washing over her.

  “Oh, okay. Good.” A broad smile pulled at her lips as she brushed her hair off her face and secured it behind her ear.

  As she nervously licked her lips, his pupils dilated as he slowly blinked. It was so empowering to see the effect she had on him. Empowering and arousing.

  Her body was vibrating with anticipation as she leaned forward and covered his plump head with her lips. Her hand held hi
m at his base as she moved her head down, pulling him deep into her mouth. Her tongue ran along his shaft, and she licked his smooth skin as she sucked him down. When she took him as far as she could, she pulled back. Then her hand followed the path of her lips, easily sliding up his wet shaft.

  After several more pumps, Adam threaded his hand in her hair and guided her movements, his fingers spreading across the back of her head, tangling in her hair. Each tug on her scalp caused small shocks of tingles to explode between her legs. She squeezed her legs together as the carnal ache grew in intensity, her thighs quivering under the sensual strain.

  Jane couldn’t believe how good giving Adam pleasure felt. She loved the feeling of his hard column of flesh in her mouth. She loved his taste, his scent, his hand guiding her head to pump himself in and out of her mouth.

  He swelled even larger, more rigid, and then his body surged against her tongue. Fevered anticipation whipped through her as she began moving her head faster, squeezing her hand tighter. She wanted all of him. She wanted to taste him, feel him explode in her mouth. But just as she was bracing for that to happen, she was lifted up and laid on her back.

  She was going to protest, but her words were cut off when the bed dipped and her legs were spread wide. The urgency and passion in Adam’s eyes as he pulled the lace covering her mound to the side were almost enough to send Jane up and over the peak.

  His finger slid against her folds, spreading her arousal up and down her center. The way he touched her, so gentle yet commanding, caused every nerve ending in her body to come alive. Not just in the intimate area where his fingers stroked, but his touch also sent tingles down her legs, up her torso, and down her arms, pushing her to the edge of orgasm.

  Before she reached her release, Adam slipped her panties off and moved over her. In one driving thrust, he entered her possessively. Framing her head with his arms, he filled her to the hilt and stilled for a moment. His body started to move as he deftly removed her bra so that there were no barriers between them.