“Let me give you a hint,” I said. “It’s Elliott Cooper.”
“Cooper, Cooper,” Dean said. “Any relation to James Fenimore?”
“No,” I said. “I’m Gary’s grandson and Jackie’s cousin.”
“Okay,” Dean said. “I think I have to placed. You’re that clever gumshoe from Hollywood, aren’t you?”
“Bingo,” I said.
“What can I do for you this morning, Mr. Cooper?” Dean said.
“You must have gotten laid last night,” I said. “What else could put you in this kind of rare mood?”
Gloria gave me a strange look. I turned away from her and continued my phone conversation.
“You got it in one,” Dean said. “But that’s another story for another time. What’s up?”
“Are you free for a few minutes this afternoon?” I said. “I’d like to stop in and run something by you.”
I could hear Dean paging through his appointment book. “I have a few minutes at three-thirty,” he said.
“Can I stop in then?” I said.
“Don’t bother,” Dean said. “My business is taking me pretty close to your office. Suppose I stop up there. Are you going to be around?”
“Yes. That works out perfect for me,” I said. “We’ll see you then. Thanks, Dean.”
I got off the phone and turned to Gloria. “What’s got into you?” I said. “You seem awfully touchy.”
Gloria shrugged and shook her head. “I don’t know what you’re talking about?” she said.
“When I…” I started to say before she interrupted.
“So Dean’s coming here?” she said. “What are you looking for?”
I paused and then decided it would be best not to pursue my questions with her mood. “I just thought I’d see if Dean might be aware of anyone in his records that may have used the fake cop M.O. in the past. I know it’s a long shot, but what else have we got?”
“No,” Gloria said. “That’s good. That’s one way to go that I hadn’t thought of. But if you wanted to check his records, it would have been better for you to go to him than to have him come here.”
“He was going to be in the neighborhood anyway,” I said. “I can at least feel him up and then go back to the precinct if this pans out.”
Gloria gave me another stern look.
“What is it this time?” I said.
“Feel him up?” she said.
“What?”
“You said you could feel him up.” Gloria said.
I shook my head. “Did I?” I said. “I meant feel him out. Why would that make you give me that kind of look?”
“What kind of look?” Gloria said.
“I don’t know,” I said. “I can’t put my finger on it, but it almost feels like resentment or tension, but I haven’t done anything to deserve resentment or cause any tension, have I?”
“You’re imagining things,” Gloria said. “I don’t resent you and I don’t feel any tension, either.”
“If you have a personal problem,” I said, “You can always talk to me, if you like. I’m a good listener.”
“I don’t have a problem,” Gloria said. “And I wish you’d just drop it. I’m just fine.”
I held both hands up in surrender. “Fine,” I said, and got up from my desk. “I have to go out for a while. I’ve got some errands to run. I’ll be back shortly.”
“Now who’s got a problem?” Gloria said.
“I’m not the one with the problem,” I said.
“Then why are you running away?” Gloria said.
I walked over to her desk just as she was coming around from behind it. I stood nose to nose with her. Neither of us said a word and then a moment later we threw our arms around each other and locked our lips in a long, passionate kiss. When we released a few seconds later, she looked into my eyes briefly and then looked away.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I shouldn’t have…”
“No,” Gloria said. “Don’t be sorry. I’m not.”
I grabbed her and kissed her again, this time longer. We held onto each other after the kiss and she hugged me tightly. I whispered in her ear, “You realize that this is probably a mistake, don’t you. I mean we’re working together. It could get in the way.”
Gloria pulled away and looked up at me. “I can separate business from personal,” she said. “I’ll still have your back on the job and I can still do my job without this being a problem. Can you?”
I thought for a moment. “Yes, I can,” I said. “What do we do now?”
Gloria smiled. “Just kiss me again, Elliott.”
And I did. Gloria and I sat on the leather sofa against the wall. I held her hand and she laid her head on my shoulder. I had to admit that she stirred something in me that I hadn’t felt for a long time and I liked it. I wondered what the future would hold for us.
Gloria raised her head and looked at me. “Why didn’t we connect the first time I worked with you?” she said.
“I don’t know,” I said. “I guess I didn’t think it was appropriate or maybe I thought that you might not feel the same way and I didn’t want to risk rejection.”
“Well,” she said, “You don’t have to worry about that.”
“Would you like to take in a movie after work tonight?” I said.
“No,” Gloria said. “How about if we just catch an old movie on television at my place tonight? There’s a Spielberg movie I’ve been waiting to see.”
“Really?” I said. “Which one?”
“It’s called E.T.,” she said. “From the early eighties. It’s about…”
“Are you kidding?” I said. “I’ve seen that one probably a dozen times or more. It’s my all-time favorite Spielberg movie. Haven’t you seen it yet?”
“About as many times as you have,” Gloria said. “I never get tired of it.”
“As you know,” I told Gloria, “I’m a bit of a movie trivia nut.”
“Yes,” she said. “I do recall something about that.”
“Did you know that the Mars Candy Company was approached by Spielberg about having an M&Ms product placement in the film?”
“Product placement?” Gloria said. “What’s that?”
“That’s where a company’s product is placed conspicuously in a movie, giving it maximum exposure,” I said. “The movie people get paid by the product company to show the product on the screen, almost like a subliminal commercial. In exchange, the product company agrees to promote the film along with its product. They both come out ahead.”
“And why are you telling me this?” Gloria said.
“I’m coming to that part,” I said. “Anyway, Spielberg approached M&Ms about having their candy featured in his film and those boneheads at Mars Candy turned him down. I guess they couldn’t believe that any movie about an alien would ever amount to anything special. Can you believe it? So Spielberg went to Mars’ competitor, Hershey and got them to agree to let him use Reese’s Pieces instead of M&Ms to lure E.T. out of the bushes.”
“I do remember that,” Gloria said. “I thought those were M&Ms. I’ll have to take a closer look this time.”
“Well,” I went on, “Needless to say, sales of Reese’s Pieces went through the roof and there’s probably a former advertising executive at Mars somewhere who is out of a job. He’ll be remembered as the man who turned down product placement in E.T.”
“Like the man at Decca Records who turned down The Beatles,” Gloria said. “He had his chance and said no, claiming that guitars were on their way out. So Brian Epstein, their manager, took the demo tape to EMI and George Martin signed them up and the rest, as they say, is history.”
“You’re no trivia slouch yourself,” I said.
“So, it’s my place tonight for a little E.T.?” Gloria said.
“Perfect,” I said. “What time is it coming on?”
“Eight o’clock,” Gloria said. “How about if you come over around seven? I can make us dinner before we watch it.”
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“I’ll be there,” I said, smiling warmly at her. “And if we get distracted and miss a little of it, who cares? We both know what’s going to happen.” Right after I said that, I winced and looked away.
Gloria gave me a quick kiss and stood up, pulling me up with her. “I thought you said you had some errands to run.” she said.
“Just one,” I said. “It shouldn’t take me too long. I’ll be back in plenty of time to meet with Dean.”
“I’ll be here waiting,” Gloria said and sat behind my desk.
I drove home and left my car running in the driveway while I ran inside. In the living room I opened my video cabinet and ran my finger across the DVD titles on the shelf. I stopped in the E section and pulled the DVD off the shelf—E.T. The Extraterrestrial. This is why I’d seen the movie so often. We wouldn’t have to rely on the television schedule or worry about commercial breaks.
On the way back to the office, I pulled up to the corner where a woman was selling flowers. I called her over to my window and bought one red rose. I paid the woman and tipped her a buck besides. I drove back to the office and pulled into the space in our parking lot. A few seconds later, Dean pulled in right next to my car, got out and walked over to my window. I rolled it down and looked up at him.
“I wasn’t speeding, officer, honestly,” I said. “And I’m mostly sober.”
“Cute,” Dean said. “I’ll have to remember that one. Are you going somewhere?”
“Nope,” I said. “I’m just coming back, and just in time, it looks like. Are you coming up?”
“Actually,” Dean said. “It might be handier if we drove back to my office. You wanted to see me about some perps, didn’t you?”
“Now how would you know that?” I said. “I didn’t say anything on the phone about why I wanted to see you.”
“Am I right?” Dean said.
“What’s going on here?” I said.
“I got a call from a Lieutenant Houser at the Burbank Police Department,” Dean said. “He told me that you and Gloria were asking around his department about a two month old murder case.”
“There’s no law against that, is there?” I said.
“No,” Dean said. “And Houser wasn’t complaining. He just wanted to know if I’d heard of you and asked what kind of person I thought you were.”
“And you said…”
“I told him you were legit,” Dean said. “And that he had nothing to worry about. Is that what you wanted to hear?”
I nodded. “You could have added something about how brave and trustworthy I am,” I said.
“You’re a P.I.,” Dean said. “Not a Boy Scout. So, what was it specifically that you wanted to know from me?”
“Climb in,” I said. “I’m getting a stiff neck looking up at you.”
Dean walked around and slid in the passenger side of my car. He picked up the single rose and sniffed it. “What’s this?”
“What does it look like?” I said. “It’s a rose.” I held my hand out and took it from him, gently placing it on the dash.
“You’re not wearing a suit,” Dean observed. “And your jacket doesn’t have a lapel, so I can assume that you didn’t buy it for yourself.”
I tried to ignore his wise cracks. “What I wanted to see you about was if you had any records of men who may have posed as cops in the past. Specifically, left handed men who may have posed as cops.”
“Why are you asking?” Dean said.
“It’s just a hunch for now,” I said. “Do you suppose I could have a look in your files?”
“Not until you tell me what this is about,” Dean said. “If you’re holding out…”
I held one hand up. “Dean,” I said. “I’m just following up a lead. If it leads somewhere, I’ll fill you in. If it doesn’t, I don’t want to waste your time, all right?”
“Sounds to me like you’re protecting someone,” Dean said. “I’ve been at this long enough to know.”
“Actually, I am,” I said. “He’s scared to death and we promised to protect his identity. So, can I see the files, or not?”
“Sure,” Dean said. “I’m going back there now. You want to follow me back?”
“I’ll be along in a minute,” I said, grabbing the rose off the dash.
Dean made an exaggerated motion of looking up at my building. “Might you be bringing that up to your office?” he said, with a stupid smirk on his face.
“I just want to put this in some water,” I said. “Do you mind?”
“Could the recipient’s name rhyme with euphoria?” Dean said.
I hiked a thumb in Dean direction. “Come on, out,” I said. “I’ll be along in a few minutes.
Dean slid out and walked around to his car, laughing the whole time. He drove away and I could still hear his laughter from the other end of the parking lot. I brought the rose upstairs and handed it to Gloria, along with the DVD of the sci-fi classic, E.T. “In case we miss anything on TV tonight,” I said.
Gloria smelled the rose and then stood on her toes to kiss me again. “Thank you, Elliott,” she said. “I’ll put this in some water. Dean should be here any time now.”
“He’s already been and gone,” I said. “I ran into him in the parking lot and he agreed to let me stop by and have a look in his files. I have to leave again.”
“Can I come along?” Gloria said.
“You’d better stay here and keep an eye on things,” I said. I surely didn’t want Dean giving us the fish eye when we walked in together. I still wasn’t used to the idea of Gloria and me being somewhat of a couple. I’d wait until we were more comfortable with each other before I started letting other people know about us.
I left the office again and drove over to the twelfth precinct. Dean was in his office and had four file folders laid out on his desk when I walked in.
“This is all I could find,” Dean said. “I mean, there have been others who tried to pass themselves off as cops, but these four are the only ones who are still alive and walking around free. I assume that’s what you were looking for.”
“That’s perfect,” I said. “Could I get copies of some of this material?”
Dean shook his head. “You can write down whatever you think is useful, but no copies.”
I pulled my notepad from my pocket and started going through the folders. I wrote down all four of the men’s names along with their addresses, employment information and general description. I flipped the notepad shut and returned it to my pocket.
“Thanks, Dean,” I said. “If this turns into anything, you’ll be the first to know, I promise.”
“Watch your back,” Dean said.
I had intended to drive straight back to the office and pick up Gloria before I started checking out these four names, but one of the men on this list lived between the twelfth precinct and my office. It was on the way, so I swung over to the thirteen hundred block of McCadden Place near Fountain Avenue. The house was one of three similar bungalows situated down a narrow alley. It was the middle house I was looking for. The small front yard was surrounded by a thigh high white picket fence with a gate near the front door. I stepped inside the fence and up one step onto the front cement slab that served as a porch.
I rang the bell and waited. I could hear footsteps inside and after a few seconds the front door opened and I was looking at a medium-height man in his late fifties. He wore a strapped tee shirt, commonly known as a wife beater shirt, dark slacks and no shoes or socks. He looked at me warily.
“Yeah?” he said. “What do you want?” He was holding a can of beer in his right hand. His left hand was scratching his butt.
“Jacob Finley?” I said, looking at my notepad.
“Who wants to know?” he said.
“My name is Elliott Cooper,” I said. “I’m wondering if you’re the same Jacob Finley I’ve been looking for.”
“Why?” the man said, sipping from his beer can.
“I’ve been hired to find one Mr. Finley in re
gards to an insurance claim.” I lied, hoping he wouldn’t notice. “The Finley I’m looking for may have some money coming to him from a deceased relative. It’s only a couple thousand dollars, but I have to be sure I have the right man.”
“I’m the right Jacob Finley,” he said. “You got some money for me?”
“Sir,” I said. “I’ll need to see a sample of your signature to compare with the one I already have. Could you sign your name on this notepad for me, please?”
Finley set his beer on a table just inside his door and took my notepad and pen from my hand and signed his name with his right hand, and handed it back to me. I looked at his signature and then flipped my notepad back to the page where I had written his name down in Dean’s office. I looked back up at the man. “I’m sorry to have bothered you, Mr. Finley, but the signatures don’t match. You’re not the man I’m looking for. Good day, sir.”
Before Finley could argue the point, I turned and stepped off his porch and walked back toward my car on McCadden Place. Once back in my car, I crossed Finley’s name off my list and checked the next name and accompanying address. It was a house near Lockwood and Vermont so I decided to stop by the office first and pick up Gloria. She might come in handy if it came to getting information from a reluctant man.
I stepped off the elevator and hurried down the hall to my office. Gloria was on the phone when I walked in. She talked a lot quieter when she saw me. I waited until she’d finished before speaking.
“Dean gave me a list with four names and addresses on it,” I said. “I have four men here who have records for impersonating an officer. It’s possible our guy might be one of these men. Can we close this place up for a while? I’d like you to come with me on these last three.”
“What happened to the forth guy?” Gloria said.
“It was on the way here,” I said, “So I already stopped there and he’s right handed and kind of old. He’s not the guy we’re looking for.”
“Sure,” Gloria said. “Just let me grab my jacket.”
“Who was on the phone just now when I walked in?” I said. “Another client?”
“No,” Gloria said. “I just called Clay to see how he’s doing.”
The Complete Cooper Collection (All 97 Stories) Page 190